• Published 16th Jul 2012
  • 6,581 Views, 618 Comments

If Smosh Were Ponies - Regidar



Ian and Anthony find themselves in the magical land of equestria

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Boxman in Equestria

Boxman sat alone. He had been forgotten by his friends, Ian and Anthony, never to been seen again. Boxman's era was up, so now he was committing suicide in the most horrible manner possible. He was going to watch a Jersey Shore marathon.

FOR ONE HOUR STRAIGHT.

Why would one choose such a horrible fate? We may never know, but fortunatly, someone stopped in to save him, right as he was about to press the button whoch would have caused his horrible demise.

"Boxman! I need you!" Elijah grabbed the boxed man and threw him through a random portal.

"Why the hell do you need me?" Boxman felt a little bit of joy ignite in his long dead heart.

"I'm running out of ideas, so, I thought I'd take a page from The Simpson's book and just put in a bunch of celeb cameos!"

Boxman felt the small bit of joy be brutally murdered. He stared at the ponies that had congregated around him.

"You want me to sing a song, don't you?"

The ponies nodded their heads.

"Fine..."

Boxman jumped to his feet.

"Woah! What's this? I'm in a kids TV show? Man, this is one place I thought I'd never go! When I thought Brony, I thought fag! But now I got some of this pony swaaaggg..."

Everypony stared at Boxman, unamused. "You suck. No wonder you havn't been around for a while." Carrot Top than lit Boxman on fire. Boxman screamed and ran around, flailing his arms to and fro, before falling off a conveniently placed cliff, where he died in horrible agony for twenty-six more hours then he would have if he had just watched Jersey Shore.

"Well, that was entertaining. I like liking things on fire! I think I'll go torch Twilight Sparkle's house!" Carrot Top trotted off, lighting small fires here and there.

The other ponies stared after her, then were about to go back to their daily routine when a Pewdiepony and Princess Luna ran by, screaming.

"I TOLD YOU TO STAHY AWAY FROM DAH BARRELS!"

"I TOLD THOU MY APOLOGIES!"

A large monster with a badly drawn smiley super glued to its face chased after the two heroes. Derpy flew behind it, whistling the tune to Spongebob and eating a muffin.

"This day couldn't get any weirder," said an annonymous background pony, whoom I have dubbed "Snubbles."

Then, a large couch landed on Snubbles, killing him instantly.

"Ian, watch it! I don't want you to stain the couch!"

"Sorry! I'm still getting used to this horn thing!"

Ian and Anthony sat down of the half-eaten couch which they now used to sit everywhere. Laughing, the two watched as the monster chased Luna and Pewdiepony around.

Ponies stared at the two. "What are you looking at?" Asked Anthony.

"We need you to do something to drive the plot forward!"

Ian sighed dramatically and rolled his eyes. "Do we have to? It sounds like work."

"Could this get anymore meta? I mean, honestly-" Anthony began, but was interrupted by the following events.

From the sky came an angelic chorus, and down from heaven descended...

Elijah.

"Never fear, for I will-" Ian shot Elijah in the face, killing him.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Anthony screamed.

"There! He's dead, and now we won't ever have to deal with his stupidity ever again! No more lame self-inserts, and no more doucebagery!" Ian put the gun back into the folds of the couch, where it joined an old bottle, three sticks of gum, a penny, and Fluttershy's very own copy of "Mares Gone Wild."

Something odd was happening, though. slowly, the world began to fade, ponies and scenery disappearing.

"What's going on?" Ian asked rather stupidly.

"You idiot, killing the author will make the story stop! We're all gonna die!" Anthony smacked Ian up a bit, accomplishing nothing, and letting the world degrade even further while they wasted precious time they could have been using to think of an idea to save them.

"Wait! I know," Ian said, taking a cue from the narrative. "We can write the story! Then we don't have to die!"

Ian produced a pen and paper from out of nowhere, and began to write.

"Do you seriously just carrry pen and paper around for just this occasion?"

"And you called me paranoid. WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, MOM?" An older, white maned pony smacked Ian in the face.

"I am! I found out about Equestria a while ago, and I've been taking all of your milk and replacing it with Big Macintosh's sperm! So there!"

Ian's eyes widened in horror, and he looked over at Big Macintosh.

"Eeyup."

Ian sat there, jaw hanging wide open, then came to the conclusion. "Wait... it actually didn't taste that bad." Ian's mom threw up her hooves in defeat and trotted away, while Big Macintosh stared in shock at Ian.

"Oh, give me that! We're going to stop existing at this rate!" Anthony grabbed the paper, and began to write.