• Member Since 1st Sep, 2017
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

TheOnlySaneDraconequus


According to the voices in my head, I’m completely insane. … Mind you, they say they’d have to be as well, since they hang around with me all day.

Sequels1

T

The gods must have a strange sense of humor. Without even bothering to consult me, they sent me from Earth to Equestria, and changed me into a Spirit with no identity of my own. In order to find out who, and what I am, I'll have to meet with a cast of crazy ponies, but will end up finding my place in the multiverse.
(In later chapters will contain light M/M shipping, so if you don't like that kind of thing, don't read it.)

Chapters (11)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 102 )

I rather like it. As far as your editing, nothing sticks out. Your pacing seems good. Its not to fast, not to dragging.

Personally, I really dislike how the majority of the "Human In Equestria" stories have the human suffer from verbal diarrhea , and instantly tell everyone that they meet that they are aliens from another dimension and that Equestria is a cartoon show. Personally I think that it is the dumbest thing someone in that situation could possibly do. It would be smarter to keep vague and quiet. So I appreciate that you curbed it a bit. I really like your first chapter and I will look forward to more.

Keep up the good work.

The Monk

(In later chapters will contain light M/M shipping, so if you don't like that kind of thing, don't read it.)

So in other words you're going to take it in the bum from the king of the crayola bug-horses? At least, that's ehat I assume with Thorax in the tags...

You have my attention, i soon hope you have my interest. :moustache:

8407026
Thank you, I appreciate the compliment! I tend to do the verbal diarrhea thing in real life, so I’m glad it didn’t spill into the story too much.

8408232
Thank you! I've been writing large chunks of the story in my spare time, but nothing's finished yet. :raritydespair:

Comment posted by darktempest deleted Nov 22nd, 2017

And please don't tell me it's for plod convenient because I think the only convenience is that everybody always uses the same thing. If you ever try to make another story please give the main character a better spine. But other than that please continue

8431173
8431184
That's like saying "I'm Vegeta, prince of all saiyans! No-one is a match for me!"
Then getting his ass handed to him my Frieza on Namek.

The potential for power is there, he just hasn't unlocked it yet.

Ok the first paragraph describing the Draconequus could you break that up a bit? it's a pretty big wall of text there, especially with it going between describing different parts of him and Fluttershy's reaction.

Maybe its just me, but that felt more like a show of power than an introduction. "A new draconequus? Better all get togeyher and politely intimidate him into compliance." Seriously, a "sentence"? It honestly makes it sound like they're already planning on getting rid of him.

Also, Thorax when? Is it gonna be super cute?

8434642
They weren’t trying to intimidate him, they were just trying to figure out what to do with having a new Draconequus on their hooves. They weren’t sentencing him to anything, Shining Armor was just joking that they were because he knew the Princesses can be scary unintentionally. :trollestia: (Also, he’s had to sit through a Twilight lecture as a colt, and it haunts him still…) :twilightoops:

Thorax should pop up in a few chapters, I’ve got it planned out, I’m just a slow writer. :raritycry: I don’t know if it’ll be cute, but I hope so.

8434725
My guess is they meet at one of Spike's games. Speaking of which, any experience with dnd woukd likely shake up one of his OnO games interestingly. That or he says "You know what Spike? I havent met all the local royals. Why don't you introduce me to your friends Thorax & Ember?" "Bu-, how did you know about them?" "Oh, I know lots of things. LoTs Of tHiNgS."

Eh, this chapter kinda bugs me. Aside from Fluttershy, Discord, Twilight and Spike (maybe Pinkie? Its hard to tell about her) I really don't see much real friendliness about equestria. Everyone seems, I don't quite know the word... distasteful? Unwanting? I just feel disinclined to believe their sonh, it doesn't seem genuine. Though Twilight herself seems like she's putting effort into him, plus she seems fully aware that the Princesses saying they're "sentencing" him implies a threat of very unpleasant things. And i'm not saying the chapter is bad, just that some of the characters actions have left me somewhat dissapointed in them.

8482120

To be fair, most head cannons have the ponies being friendly to ponies while having real distrust and even bigotry to other races. Many Authors have diamond dogs, zebra, humans, and griffons getting dirty looks while simply walking down the street. Often having ponies switching to the other side of the street, rather than walk by them. So the reactions posted in the chapter are quite mild by comparison.

The Monk

8431290
Thank you for pointing that out! (Sorry, I didn't notice your comment until just now. :twilightblush:) I edited it, hopefull in a way that breaks it up better while still making sense. If not let me know.
Ta!

*shrugs* Seems fine to me. Its not like this is anywhere in the established timeframe of the show, so people acting a bit different is to be expected.

And I was right, it was super cute.

Comment posted by deathcombo99 deleted Nov 22nd, 2017

And of course par for course for a Draconequui it had to be a Tongue Twister...

Both kinds of magic? A bit cliche, but fits the theme well.

8562924
Yyeeeeeaahhh ... Cliches are usually all I can manage. :facehoof: Thank you so much for sticking it out this far! It means a lot to me. Your comments help keep me going, and inspire me to be slightly better as I go along. Have a moustache :moustache: and my thanks. :twilightsmile:

8561741
Well ... yes. Of course, naturally. I couldn't make it easy for them, now could I?:trollestia:

Comment posted by deathcombo99 deleted Nov 22nd, 2017

8565450
If Sec be the spirit of duality, and Thorax is a changling, does that mean they can have babies together via gender bending magic powers? 'Cause that would be both epic and sweet, a touch of sleep deprivation with lemon zest!

8607417
Sec's a Draconequus, he can do anything! :rainbowdetermined2: I'd actually had one or ten ideas on the subject :rainbowlaugh:, but I'd rather save them for a possible sequel.

You've got some unicode at the end of this chapter and the last one.

Disclaimer to anyone wanting to read this:

Main character is a misanthrope.

What's up with the character-substitution ciphers? I don't want to have to figure out the key...

8657051
Sorry, those keep popping up by accident! Thanks for pointing that out!

“They make good substitute friends when you can’t be with your real friends. They take you out of a bad situation, and put you somewhere wonderful, where you can live a life of adventure and wonder, since sometimes real life isn’t enough.”

:fluttercry: It's true! :raritycry:

Dammit, I need a new update now! I need to see Sec obliterate a portion of the world to get Thorax back ;-;

Well sombra has a not so friendly lovecrafteion horror after him say goodbye to your life and or sanity sombrero

Sombra's a dead thot walking~~~~~~~~!! Gonna be reeeeeeaaaaaaallll dead~~~~~

Don't worry, this is about as dark as it will get, the forcast shows a 100% chance of the usual, tooth-rotting fluff returning soon!

I love this story! But when is the next chapter?

8737354
Right now! I actually have the rest of the story written, but since I'm half evil, I've decided to drag it out, and post a chapter a week. :trollestia:

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!