• Member Since 1st Apr, 2012
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I'm a brony and a Pinkie Pie fan but I like all of the mane six, as well as Spike. I hope to provide some entertaining and interesting fanfics for the Brony community.



This story is a sequel to My Little Pony Friendship is Magic What If?: Volume 4

Five times the rewrites, five times the speculation, five times the drama! It's here once again, that series which dares to ask the question: "What if that episode had been written differently?"

Since Season 7 is still ongoing at the moment, we've got episodes from Season 1, and Season 4-6 up for a rewrite, ten to be exact. They include one episode being expanded in a two parter, another taking place in a timeline with a different episode order, and even two bonus chapters involving a different character being the star. But what episodes will make the cut of this ten episode collection? Well, you'll have to read to find out.

Yet again, I must reiterate that all of the episodes that appear here and are rewritten are the result of my personal opinion, so don't get upset if an episode you like is on the list or an episode you didn't like isn't on the list. I'll respect your opinions, so long as you respect mine, and again know that you are not obligated to read any of these chapters if you don't want to.

And in case it was ever in doubt, I mean no disrespect to Hasbro, the DHX writing and directing staff, or the people who like the episodes rewritten here. The intent of this fic, like its predecessors, is for entertainment purposes only.

Curious as to what other episodes have already been rewritten? Be sure to check out volumes 1-4. You can find them below:
For Volume 1, click here!
For Volume 2, click here!
For Volume 3, click here!
For Volume 4, click here!

(Apologies for the image, again it was the best I could do.)

Chapters (10)
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Comments ( 31 )

Hey there. Excellent start on the rewrites in this Volume. Yeah, I can definitely see the reasoning for the rewrite that you did in the author's notes.

At any rate, excellent job on the characterizations, exchanges and wrap-up in this rewrite. I definitely agree that the episode works A LOT better as a flashback to explain how Pinkie knows about the Parasprites. I also really liked how Twilight is already learning to be more appreciative of Spike.

Anyway, now I'm on to the next chapter.

Again, superb work on the re-write. :-D I truly appreciate you liking a couple of my ideas enough to use them. Again, you gave some excellent reasoning for the re-writes in the author's notes.

Anyway, once again, the exchanges, characterizations, episode wrap-up and future episode set-up were quite well done in all the right places.

And - now, I'm on to the next chapter.

Again, thanks very much for liking another one of my ideas enough to use a modified version of it. I am glad I was able to inspire you in such a way.

Anyway, excellent reasoning for the re-write in the author's notes once again. Also, VERY good job on the exchanges, characterizations, chapter wrap-up and future "episode" set-up in all the right places. And, yeah, I LOVED the nod to Tibbles from the comics.

And, now, on to the next chapter once again.

Once again, excellent job on the reasoning for the re-write. The exchanges, characterizations and episode wrap-up were quite well done. I loved how you went into more details concerning the methods AND gave the culprit a deeper motive.

Anyway, I will very definitely be looking forward to more of this, but will also be quite willing to be patient.

Again, excellent job on this rewritten chapter. I can definitely understand the reasoning behind the re-write. And, of course, the exchanges, characterizations and episode wrap-up were all quite well done in all the right areas.

Now, I have a couple of possible ones for "What IF? Volume Six"

"Hearts and Hooves Day": Twilight sees through the Crusaders' reason for wanting the book on love potions quickly enough to deny it to them. Thus, they have to stick to more comparatively honest methods of match making (including stuff that contains elements of both Mac AND Cheerliee's biggest interests and stuff that allow them to get to know each other on a deeper level [but still WELL within an "Everyone" rating]). In other words, it has a couple of elements of "Hard To Say Anything", which ties directly into the next idea.

"Hard To Say Anything": Mac tries to help Party Favor court Sugar Belle, much as the Crusaders helped him in courting Cheerliee a couple of years earlier.

"Triple Threat": Spike, Thorax and Ember have to deal with a team-up of Chrysalis, Garble AND the Diamond Dogs WITHOUT the help of the Mane Six OR Starlight (after all, with an episode title like "Triple Threat", it would make sense to have the problem come from a team-up of three of the show's past villains [which it probably WOULD BE in a more adventure-oriented show] and it would make sense for Chrysalis, with her resources GREATLY diminished, to go looking for help in the form of allies with enough muscle to be useful, but enough stupidity for her to easily control [and, more importantly for the plot, they would have to be menacing enough to last 22 minutes without any of the good guys having to hold the Idiot Ball, but stupid enough for Spike, Ember and Thorax to realistically outwit on their own]).

Of course, I can completely understand if you don't like any of the ideas. Plus, at any rate, I will very definitely be looking forward to more of this, but will also be quite willing to be patient.

8404817 I could maybe see about the first one, "Hearts and Hooves Day" is pretty good but Twilight's role is shoehorned in and the bit with the book always does throw me off. Why would someone put the recipe for a love poison that crippled a kingdom into a book displayed in a public library, especially without a disclaimer warning not to attempt recreating it? That's the very reason why there's the warning "Don't try this at home", because you never know when someone might be foolish enough to try something they read or heard about from a fictional source.

"Hard To Say Anything" could maybe work if you replaced Big Mac with Party Favor and just had him fighting Feather Bangs for Sugar Belle's affections. I'm tempted to say Rarity should be the one suggesting he make grand gestures, but at the same time I could perhaps buy Double Diamond or Night Glider doing the same.

And "Triple Threat", I don't think I'll go with that idea. Really, I already know I'd cut out the map and have Ember and Thorax meet much sooner.

Hey there. Thanks greatly for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. Once again, very good reasoning behind the re-write. Also, excellent job on the characterizations, exchanges and future chapter set-up in all the right places. Clever inspiration concerning the casting too.

Well, on to part two. :-D

Again, excellent work on the re-write. Splendid reasoning once again (particularly in the Mythology Gags mentioned in the author's notes). In addition, the exchanges, characterizations and wrap-up were, once again, quite well done.

I'll very certainly be looking forward to more of this, but will also be more than willing to be patient.

Awesome job, Now that 28 pranks later we wanted

Again, great job on the re-write. :-D The reasoning you gave in the writer's notes was perfect. :-D And, yeah, it makes A LOT more sense to make Discord the subject of the episode instead of Rainbow. And it ALSO makes more sense for the "cookie zombie" thing to be for real rather than a city-wide hoax.

At any rate, excellent job on the exchanges, characterizations and "episode" wrap-up in all the right places.

Indeed, pranks SHOULD be reserved for those that can specifically take it (or, like most of the targets of Bugs Bunny or the Warner Siblings, is being a big enough jerk to deserve it) and, even then, should never be taken too far.

But I digress.

Anyway, I will definitely be looking forward to more of this, but will also be very willing to respect that real world concerns have to come first.

i can't help but feel like you're setting something up with the Filthy Rich family..

Something along the lines of divorce and/or court. Maybe it's just me and biased opinion of hating Spoiled Rich

8415637 I'd very much like for that to happen, but at least for now in this series I don't forsee that being the case.

Hey there. Once again, thanks immensely for getting the second-to-last rewrite in this volume up. Again, excellent reasoning for the re-write. The characterizations, exchanges and wrap-up were, of course, quite well done. Makes me wish, again, that YOU were one of the actual writers for the series.

I'll definitely be looking forward to the final rewrite in this volume, but I will also certainly respect that real world concerns have to come first.

Hey there. Very little I can say beyond excellent job on the last rewrite in this volume. You make VERY valid points in the author's notes, as usual, PLUS you did a great job on the characterizations, exchanges, action and wrap-up in all the right places. Altering the focus to Soarin' and Fleetfoot makes FAR more sense as you pointed out.

Of course, now that Rainbow is a full Wonderbolt, Fleetfoot is only the SECOND faster Wonderbolt (two words: Sonic Rainboom), but that's another story.

Now, for another rewrite idea (either for the next volume or for Volume Seven [because I already KNOW there IS going to be a Volume Seven]):

Daring Done: Instead of it being obvious that Callberon is framing Daring, it's more of a case of Villain Has A Point (after all, even Superman only OCCASIONALLY stops to help repair the damage caused in his fights). Plus, it is made clear that Rainbow allows herself to be captured ON PURPOSE specifically to motivate Daring to get back in the game (even if only temporarily). Also, instead of a Bond Villain Stupidity based confession on Callberon's part, Daring simply acknowledges that she needs to learn to be A LOT more careful and agrees to donate the proceeds to the book sales to help out the villages she does her adventuring in.

Of course, if you don't like the ideas or if you already have a better one (both of which, I will concede, are entirely possible) I profusely apologize for wasting your time.

At any rate, I will very definitely be looking forward to more of your work, but will also respect the fact that real world concerns need to come first.

8418801 Daring Done isn't high on my list of rewrites at the moment, assuming I ever wanted to rewrite it that would probably not be for least three more rewrite volumes, assuming I can keep cranking out one or two a year.

Fair enough. I can completely understand that.

8419308 I didn't consider the error with Fleetfoot, but I could shrug it off in that she's referring to full time members, Rainbow Dash is only part time.

An extremely valid point. I didn't think of that myself to be honest. Good eye on that. :-D

I read most of these chapters in this and other volumes, and I actually enjoyed how more fleshed out your interpretations of those episodes were, even the ones the fans had trouble with.
You think you might write another volume having most of the season 7 episodes once that season is done? I'd like that. Of course it's your call. Keep doing what you like to do.

8486494 I do intend to do another volume involving Season 7, with eight episodes included from it and two other episodes. Then I'm thinking I might have something later next year for the comics, and have that as something of a frequently updating series.

Bah humpony
Scrooge McPony
You're a mean one, Miss Frost...

I see a cold wind blowing...

...The stars around...

Great story, though I find it a weird having Twilight call Spike "her son" and having Spike call her "mom". Pretty sure Twilight was around seven when Spike was born. Plus, they have more of a sisterly/brotherly relationship, and even then they don't call each other "sister" or "mom" and such.

This is, no doubt, way better than the original episode! Discord would've been a much more suitable character for "28 Pranks Later" rather than Rainbow Dash.

I have thought about rewriting one of my fanfics. In my version, I made my OC Thomas Mercer, who is Fluttershy’s son, have a character named Timber Todd and be foalsat by Ash Hatchet while his parents attend a delegate’s party somewhere else, but he’s also like Tiny Tim, but I kept Merry and Flutterholly, and have some parts relate to A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens.

Is it okay if I use Ash Hatchet, but leave the rest be as you wrote?

10809697 As long as you give me credit as inspiration for the names.

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