Wyoming carefully watched as the unarmored Alien Elite made its way to the Banshee class aircraft. He was working on a long term project, and part of it here was ensuring that no one got that vehicle. However, if he destroyed it before the Elite reached it, it could conceivably repair the vehicle...or instruct the Sim Troopers how to. His contract with Omega was still rather vague, but the details he received from his 'partner' were frankly absurd. Admittedly, the Sim Trooper identified as Tucker proved to be effective - for a Sim Trooper - against the zealot troops guarding the facility...but they were zealots. A 'dippy-bird' drink topper with a button operated gun could take them out.
So he watched and waited, his rocket launcher braced on his shoulder as he stayed partially concealed. He watched calmly as the Banshee lifted into the air, seeing 'Tucker' waving happily at the Elite as it made a few passes, plainly showing off. Seeing its guard down, Wyoming fired.
"Ferdy, watch out!"
That scream caught Wyoming off guard. He saw it came from 'Tucker', and that the Sim Trooper had...leapt 30 feet in the air to catch the rocket before it could hit the Banshee? "How did he jump so high?" he murmured in surprise.
"Wyoming!" Texas voice snarled out as she dropped her cloak and took aim.
"What a surprise seeing you here, Texas!" Wyoming called back jovially while keeping his eyes on the Banshee, the rocket, and the Sim Trooper. "You are doing well, I ho-ly!" The change in his words was caused as the Elite twisted the Banshee into a side-on flight while Tucker swung out on the rocket, kicked off the bottom of the banshee, and turned it back towards Wyoming. "Well aren't you full of surpri-" Wyoming stopped and ducked as Tucker - hanging from the rocket by one hand - hauled out his assault rifle and opened fire with a spray to make Wyoming take cover. "-ses!" he finished jovially once he was certain none of the bullets would hit him.
"Surprise this, you Blurgath Shisno!"Tucker snapped as he released the rocket and slammed feet first into Wyoming's faceplate, knocking him back as much from surprise at his choice of insult as from the impact. After all, the Elite language was quite colorful and with deep meaning, and 'Blurgath' as a word - when used as an adjective - didn't translate into English in the singular, as it was a shorthand for a much direr insult. Roughly translated, it stated, 'I will enjoy hanging you off a cliff from a thorn bush by your own entrails to see if you bounce!' Quite colorful.
Wyoming straightened himself as Tucker leapt to his feet. "That's your only free hit, boy," he stated insultingly. "Enjoy it." He knew each of the Trooper's bios, and was deliberately trying to push his foe's buttons to make him reckless.
As expected, Tucker charged in recklessly. Much to Wyoming's surprise, he was better than anticipated. He wasn't quite at the level of a Freelancer, but Wyoming actually had to push himself to block and evade every incoming attack while landing his own blows, rather than completely dominating the Sim Trooper. "Well now, someone's been eating his Wheaties-GYAH!" His taunt was cut off as sharp pain shot through his left shoulder after ducking under the last punch. "What in-" Turning, he saw a rather large knife driven through the armor and into the flesh, blood leaking out. "How? You don't have any knives on you!"
Tucker chuckled as he flicked several knives between his fingers, only for them to seem to vanish. "Last picnic we had a talent show," he gloated. "I showed off sleight-of-hand, and the hand is quicker than the eye!" He lunged in again.
Wyoming backed away carefully, keeping his eyes on Tucker's hands to ensure another strike like that wasn't missed...only to grunt in agony as he felt a sharp pain in his crotch.
Tucker pulled back his knee strike, the knife he'd hidden under that armor plate specifically for the strike left behind. "So you should have been watching my legs."
"Indeed I...should have..." Wyoming grunted out as he braced himself. "I'll remember that...for next time."
Tucker brought out the Alien Key sword. "There won't be a next time," he growled out. "You tried to kill-"
"-Ferdy-what?" Tucker began as he came in on the rocket, so caught off guard he held on just a little too long.
Spinning under the too high strike, Wyoming fired off a specially prepared round. The load of paint slammed into the back of Tucker's helmet, and his armor locked up as the rocket slammed into the side of the cliff, the explosion blasting him back. "And that's that," Wyoming began as he turned face first into Texas' sniper round-
-as he ducked to the side into Texas' sniper round-
-as he ducked to the other side into Texas' sniper round-
-as he ducked behind cover straight into Texas' armor-piercing sniper round just as it finished punching through several feet of solid rock-
-as he just barely deflected Texas' sniper round with his own weapon by holding it at an oblique angle, losing feeling in his hand in the process. "What the hell happened to my trump card?" he demanded angrily as he turned and ran, limping along. Phantom pain from the injuries Tucker had inflicted - and the several shots to the head - remained, and made running somewhat difficult and painful.
Texas cursed under her breath as she lowered her sniper rifle. While she hadn't expected it when her sensors gave her the update 'Save State abuse detected, externalizing quantum sensors', once she understood what it meant she took advantage of it. Wyoming's unique tech let him hop slightly backwards along his own timeline to evade a negative outcome, and she knew enough about how he thought to know where he'd dodge to. Her own reaction time when she disabled her body's limiters was fast enough to take advantage of every shift to hit him with the right shot...but he'd managed to get out of range this time. The AP rounds wouldn't go through that much solid rock to hit him.
Ferdy quickly brought the Banshee in for a landing, Tucker cradled in her arms. He was locked up, and she was whimpering and 'Blargh'ing over him in frenetic worry. "It's just training paint-" Texas began as she approached, only to let out a startled oath from the update her scanners gave her.
Virus detected in paint load. Analyzing...
Alert: Virus has disabled suit's life support system.
Alert: Link to Key has quantumly externalized Tucker's perceptions. Subject has been running on oxygen deficit linearly since first paralysis through four loaded states. Remaining oxygen unknown.
"He's running out of air!" Texas called out worriedly. "We need to get his suit's life support reactivated somehow!" Her thoughts raced as she tried to come up with a possible solution. "Caboose! Do something!"
"What should I do, Mom?" Caboose asked urgently.
"Anything!"
Caboose promptly kicked Tucker in the nuts. Tucker convulsed as he clutched at his crotch. "Dammit Caboose, why?!" he demanded angrily.
"I think 'how' is the more important question..." Texas murmured in confusion as her sensors indicated the virus had been neutralized, as had the lock up.
"Tucker always bends over and makes funny noises when he gets hit in the nuts, just like Picture-Man!" Caboose declared happily. "We needed his suit to move so he could breathe, so I kicked him in the nuts!"
"Picture...Man?" Texas inquired curiously.
"You know, Gif!"
"Oh...Grif..." Texas shook her head in frustration. Maud had said Caboose's magic manifested oddly...
Tucker had plainly put the situation from his mind, focusing on reassuring Ferdy that he was okay, and reassuring himself that she was.
Flowers watched calmly from his place, still concealed. "Hmm...it seems the Narrative has shifted," he observed calmly. "Things should be...interesting..."
I hope Florida will be talking to Wyoming and hopefully he can be convinced to “switch” sides.
I gotta admit, I dropped off watching RvB about when the 'Zealots' first came in, so reading this is a dam trip.
You, sir, just lost a hand. Obviously, your card would be lost in the process.
Is Ferdy ok?! I need to know!
...Wyoming is not a character I remember, but then again, there's a lot I don't remember. The save-state abuse was not something I expected in a Red vs. Blue crossover (more of an Undertale thing), but it made for an entertaining chapter. And since I had to look up who Wyoming was, here's a fun little thing I found on the RvB wiki:
Quick Question. Since Ferdy is a female elite would she look something like this?
pre00.deviantart.net/e8c3/th/pre/i/2012/087/8/d/karas__ecstasee_by_proffesionalamature-d4u9tcd.jpg
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTLFl5LdCPjFyyKYV6Xuct4r0vH-uSZ-d3yBRLR-4TsyfZTSFNJ
9252778
Wyoming is per merc, he does not do sides, just contracts. He's basically the beta version of Late series villain Locus.
I can't stop laughing lol
You know...I'm not surprised the drunk simmon's tech that makes up the systems in Tex's body/suit refereed to Wyoming's 'trump card' as 'Save State Abuse' it's relatively the same and if he is this caught off guard by just Tucker I can't wait to see the reaction to the rest of the Blood Gulch crew. Lets face it while they are the Reds and Blues they are more of a group at this point.
9252851
At this point all the Freelancers are technically mercs. The whole organization had collapsed by this point with each agent doing their own thing. My point is that with Florida in play he could convince Wyoming to switch to his side. Because we all know Maud is going to school Wyoming when they meet and I bet Florida will want some popcorn as he watches that show.
yes can't wait for more love the chapter great story RvB is a amazing series this just makes it better in every way
9252805
Wyoming always had the ability to travel back in time. that;s how Church did it in canon
9252784
You gave up before getting to the good part of the show the first five seasons are pretty stupid in a zany cartoon away but after that it starts getting better
I'm not sure if oxygen deprivation or Caboose style crotch shot is a worse way to go. Probs depends on how good Ferdy is at kissing it better.
9252929
I'll have to take your word for it on both counts. I never watched all of RvB, and my memory of it's pretty fuzzy.
Save states really are overpowered... Is there a limit on how far back Wyoming can go? Probably a few seconds otherwise the idiot would just go back to before he engaged our intrepid protagonists.
I think the narrative shifted a long time ago.
I can see why Wyoming would be upset. Texas is awesomely OP, especially with that tech upgrade and magic.
Still, that section made my day, what with him finding out he somehow got boxed in with gunfire across all the possible actions he could have taken.
Good ol' Caboose.
"Texas?"
"Wyoming?"
"Connecticut!"
9252937
Yeah, I've seen some clips of the later seasons and it seems pretty good, but when I stopped, it was because I got through what I did, saw just how much of the show was left, i.e. a LOT (and it wasn't even finished at that point, not sure if it is even now), and decided I didn't have the dedication in me to get through the rest.
Finally back to normal
9252977
each agent had a special. Tex was invisibility and Wyoming's is the time jump
9253113
What were Washington, Maine, and Carolina's?
9253117
Carolina's was camo. Washington never showed his. and Maine.. no clue
9253058
Shh, it's too early for CT!
...To quote another fanfic: "That logic is either heavily flawed or infallible."
9253000
Yeah, honestly it probably got punted five steps sideways and three steps widdershins as soon as the PWNY entered the universe.
...Actually, make that six and four, plus one straight upward. This is Pinkie's sister, after all.
Probably.
Sleight of hand is such a useful skill as any Rogue will tell you.
Same way Pinkie Pie does anything. Rule of Funny.
9253245
Which fanfic?
9253245
Actually, in this particular instance, she is far more than simply Pinkie's sister. So you'll'' also need to divide by zero and then hypercube it. Tatsurou writes some trippy canon.
I forgot how annoying Wyoming and his Time Shifting was.
9253439
It’s a Zelda parody series - “Group of Weirdos”, by one Mr. Light Chicken Bulbs. Granted, you can tell he wrote the start of the first fic when he was just starting out, but if I remember right it gets better pretty quickly.
9253654
Oh yeah, good point. I just couldn’t remember whether her being the product of Jyggalag’s heart and Sheogorath’s mind was “proper” canon or a one-time joke, and I didn’t want to assume.
so............ (sets up a betting table) how long will it take for Wyoming to go 'what the fk is a pony doing here?!?' when he see's maud?? & how hard will church go full on 'papa wolf' on poor Wyoming?? place you're bets now guys!!
Man i love this story. I imagine maud manages to... 'convince' wyoming to join the reds and blues- or else. Mwahahaha
Never underestimate the power of the nut kick.
9254061
Maude: "...Gary, you will do as I say, understand?"
Gamma/Gary: "Affirmative."
W: "Wait wha-"
M: "On Wyoming's death, you will rewind time. Over. And over. And over. Until he finally has the sense to follow my orders...or he goes insane from dying so many times."
Tucker is such an awesome badass in this chapter. The only thing that would make it better is if he were to surf on the missile.
9253122 9253117
The way I understood it, Maine's AI's 'special' was that it was a master strategist, because it was The Alpha's "creativity". Probably the same thing Church was doing when he was working as Connecticut's AI, essentially freezing time by his perspective and planning out events step by step.
9254910
Maybe, just never mention what their special was.
9254969
Maine's special tech was the spherical shield.
9254982
No that was North Dakota's
9255035
Uh, no. Using it when it was experimental to protect everyone else while they were flying is how Maine lost his voice.
9255039
then they both had it because North used it before the AI's were made.
Okie day, Florida, why don’t you come down here and comment like a real man! 😡
9255039
Wait what? No, Maine lost his voice when someone decided to try and kill him by unloading an entire clip from a pistol into his throat...needless to say that plan didn't work and as for the shield, north Dakota did use it to save the pelican they were on. Aside from that, Maine had it because he had the module for it equipped.....that is if I remember it correctly
9255288
Oh, right. I get these things confused.
9255290
All good, we're allowed two goof ups a day
Feel? I'm pretty sure you meant some other word.
after re-re-reading this for like the 8th time i finally realized that when Gary was confused about 'Maud not = C' then corrected himself he was talking about Maud not being Carolina, but then settling on Maud being SOUTH Carolina and Carolina being NORTH Carolina. I feel stupid for not realizing that sooner
9253615
ye.
9255713
Well, that plus Gary is likely one of the few that know that Carolina is Director Church's daughter, and is confused that the Alpha considers someone besides her as one.