• Published 13th Aug 2017
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The Second Life of Moztrot - CrackedInkWell



What if the pony counterpart of Mozart was given a second chance to live in modern day Equestria?

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Chapter 30: Comfort and Joy

There is one advantage to meeting somepony that lived long before you were born: to them, you’re a blank slate. All of that hero worship evaporates, all the fanaticism is nonexistent; to them, you’re merely a pony like any other. They don’t put you on a pedestal because, at that point, we are equal.

The same applied to Rock Hoof and later to Flash Magnus, a fellow that captured perfectly what Papa had told me of the Pegasi past. He was once of a legion who had to be brave and loyal. But to my delight, it also turned out that he had a mischievous side and set maturity aside for the sake of fun.

“Here’s a good one,” said I, taking my sip of ale. “Do either of you know what rounds are?”

Both the legionnaire and the giant glanced at one another in confusion. “We don’t think so,” Rock Hoof answered. “Is it a game?”

“My favorite one too,” I grinned. “It’s very simple, I’ll start off singing a short little tune, and at certain points, I’ll point to one of you to start to repeat it, words and all before I have the other join in doing the same thing at a certain point also.”

“Seems simple,” the Pegasus shrugged. “But what’s the catch?”

“Ah, that’s where it gets fun. You’ll also have to listen carefully when you sing because I’ll be adding on top of that simple song for you to sing also. Now if any of you mess up in either the tune or the word, or even laugh at said words, you down your drink.”

“So, this is a game of memory?” the Pegasus inquired.

“Exactly,” I nodded. “So then, are you two up for such a challenge?”

“Oh, this I have to see,” Somnambula wandered over to the bar intrigued.

Stygian too came over to the bar, wanting to see how such a musical game played out. “Out of curiosity,” said he, “does this round have a familiar tune or is it one that you’ve just make up on the spot?”

“Well… while the music itself isn’t mine, I did rewrite the lyrics several years ago. But it’s still fun nonetheless.”

“How does it go?” Flash asked, and I was more than willing to start.

Lick my plot nicely, lick it nice and clean,” I began singing and the reaction was immediate. While the Southern Equestrian mare and the scarecrow unicorn had their jaws hang down in horror, the two other stallions busted out laughing.

“Good Goddesses!” the pegasi warrior said between his fits of laughter. “That’s actually real?”

I giggled, “Oh we haven’t gotten to the good bits yet,” I smiled. “So remember, the object is to listen and sing back the whole tune without laughing, missing a word or note. Gentlecolts, are we ready?”

And just like so, the canon began with me repeating,“Lick my plot nicely, lick it nice and clean. Nice and clean, lick my plot.” I pointed to Flash in which he echoed back the song as I continued on. “That’s a greasy desire, nicely buttered, like the licking of candied honey, my daily activity.” The two ponies who were once horrified found themselves rolling on the floor. I pointed to Rock Hoof for him to start the canon, then to Flash as I filled out the last part of the song. “Three will lick more than two, come on, just try it, and lick, lick, lick. Everypony lick their plots for themselves.

This managed to throw them off, to which they both took a swig.

“That has got to be the most disgusting thing I’ve ever heard,” Somnambula said once her laughter died down.

“I don’t know,” the legionnaire replied. “Sounds like a fun Saturday night to me.”

Now it was my turn to laugh like a maniac. “I like you two already, just the right sense of humor for my liking. So then, shall we begin again?”

“Could you sing the whole thing out this time around?” the giant asked, “That was a whole lot more difficult than I thought it would be.”

“I have to agree,” Stygian agreed. “It’s extremely hard to remember all of that while you are singing it and have to listen to two ponies at once.”

“All right, fine,” I rolled my eyes and sang out the whole canon with none of the other voices. And I had to sing it a few times just so that they got the tune down. “So, are we ready?” I asked them. When told that they did, I started the canon once again. This time it went a little smoother as they managed to grasp the full lyrics without stumbling… to a degree. Not to say that it was flawless as they did manage to forget a line or hit the wrong note. However, impressively enough, they managed to learn this short round pretty quickly.

However, we did have to stop when we heard someone clear their throat. There in the doorway was a servant. “Lunch is ready in the Dining Room.”

“It’s noon already?” Stygian blinked, looking at the clock. We did the same as well to find that it was already close to twelve. “Well, in that case, let’s not keep them waiting.” He then turned to us, “Uh… can the three of you walk straight?”

The three of us said that while we did feel rather tipsy, we still managed to walk straight… ish. Now and then as we made our way out of the Gaming Room to the Dining Room, Somnambula and Stygian did pause to push us upright and get us to go where we needed to be. All the while, that amusing tune still fresh in our heads, we spontaneously started up the round once more. Come to think of it, I think we were still singing it by the time we entered the Dining Room.

We met the Princesses, Mage Meadowbrook, the blond unicorn who’d been chasing Flash, and two other unicorns that I’d never seen before. One was a stallion that had a beard wearing a blue cloak with stars while the other was a mare with a curved horn who, somehow, looked much older than the stallion. However, my attention was not towards them, nor the table, but rather towards Sunbutt.

“Drunk already?” she sighed.

“Your Highness,” the healer spoke up, getting out of her chair. “Ah think Ah got somethin’ ta sober them up.” Mage walked up to us, taking a bottle out from her dress. “Ya know, Ah reckoned that somethin’ like this was bound ta happen, didn’t think it’d be this soon.” After uncorking the bottle, she let the giant first to take a gulp of the strange liquid before moving on to me.

In truth, I nearly spat out whatever it was; one moment, my mouth was on fire before fading to an aftertaste of something sweet. Whatever was in that concoction, something rather curious happened, my dizziness and the foggy mind of alcohol evaporated away until I felt none of the effects at all. At first, I was confused as I asked her what we had just swallowed.

“You wanna let that settle fer a while,” she told me. “Because Ah’ve just given Y'all some of my potions for instant sobriety.”

I was amazed at this, “Hold on,” I said as she pushed me to a chair to sit. “Are you telling me that you’ve made a cure for drunkenness?” She nodded as she settled the other two down. “But how? There’s no hangover cure in the world that clears up the senses like that.”

“You’d be right,” she told me as she helped set Flash Magnus down. “There ain’t, but what Ah’ve given ya is something that helps clear up yer head in a minute.” She then helped the giant to his seat. “Of course, it works if you rest a bit fer best results.”

“Most ingenious this potion,” said I. “I never knew that such a thing existed.”

“Well, technically Ah only made it last week,” Mage returned to her seat.

“Are you feeling better Mr. Moztrot?” Celestia asked.

After licking my chops, I responded, “Sober… Oddly sober. With a taste of honeysuckle.”

“That should be useful,” the Night Princess finally spoke. “Especially for New Year.”

“Her creativity knows no bounds,” the oldest looking stallion agreed. “Even after a thousand years, she’s still innovating new cures.” Then he noticed me and asked, “I’m sorry, I don’t believe that I’ve seen you before, who are you?”

“This is Wolfgang Moztrot,” Celestia introduced for me. “He’s the last invited guest to arrive.”

“Pardon me, Your Highness,” said I. “But who are these two?”

“The one on the left is Mist Mane, and on the right was my teacher, Star Swirl.”

It was a good thing that I didn’t have anything in my mouth because otherwise I would have spat it out. “As in, ‘The Bearded’ Star Swirl?” He nodded, “I have now officially seen everything. Then again, it doesn’t surprise me anymore.”

This made the old wizard to raise an eyebrow, “How so?”

“Well, once you’ve been flung out of your own time, met more than one alicorn princess, become more famous than you could ever dream of being, been to a city that was once a fairy tale and now encountering those that have been taken out of their time too, the shock value seems to diminish somewhat.”

He shrugged, “I suppose that’s a fair point. Although did you say that you were taken out of your time as well?”

Celestia explained my situation for me as the servants brought lunch to the table. Displaying every kind of fancy food for this feast that one could imagine. From sweet and spicy carrot salad to roast beets, a hill of rolls and even pitchers of the smoothest hot chocolate. It was a buffet for the senses from the cranberry and orange sauce to wobbling, colorful towers of jelly. By the time the Day Princess had told them of my circumstance, my plate was piled high in delectable treats.

“That was rather sweet of him,” the ancient mare is known as Mist Mane commented. “To put on that concert of his family’s and friends’ music.”

“Which reminds me,” the blond unicorn finally spoken up, turning to the other alicorns. “How was the concert in Manehattan aunties?”

“We thought it was marvelous,” Princess Luna said. “And it introduced to us to a few composers that we hadn’t known existed. Like that zebra fellow that wrote that violin concerto. Or the one from your son.”

“But the best was the new carol at the end,” Celestia pointed out. “I’ve still got that tune stuck in my head.”

I smiled, “Well that’s the mark of quality when even a Princess finds something you wrote memorably.”

“Um…” Somnambula raised a skeptical eyebrow. “By ‘memorable’ do you mean shocking?”

This got the blond prince’s attention, “What do you mean by that?”

“Let’s just say that he taught Rock Hoof and Flash Magnus a new kind of drinking song,” Stygian responded between bites of his roll. “The lyrics of which were perhaps the most vulgar I’ve ever heard.”

Celestia giggled, “I think that’s Moztrot in a nutshell. He may be a vulgar and at times immature stallion, but I promise you that his music is not.”

“Don’t forget funny,” the pegasi legionnaire added. “That round thing was the most hilarious thing I’ve ever heard.”

“What kind of music do you make, young stallion?” the aged Mist Mane inquired.

“Oh, what haven’t I made?” I responded. “Dances, songs, solos, sonatas, concertos, symphonies, operas, choir pieces, I don’t think there’s anything that I haven’t done.”

“Like fugues?” Star Swirl asked after a spoonful of soup. “Where I come from, that is the most complicated form of music there is.”

“Oh, I have my fair share of those,” I waved a hoof. “In fact, I’m able to improvise one on the spot if I have to.”

“Forgive me if I find that rather unlikely,” he said with a doubtful look. “Sure, I have dabbled in music now and again, but writing fugues is very difficult, even for myself.”

“I don’t think they’re that hard as you say,” it was then that an idea came to mind. “In fact, perhaps after lunch, I could demonstrate it? Just give me a theme and I’ll see what I can come up with.”

“Master Moztrot,” the giant interjected, “you don’t need to on Hearth’s Warm-”

“No, no. I think it’ll be fun. Show me a keyboard, give me a tune and I’ll give you both a prelude and a fugue without any mistakes from me.”

Star Swirl’s eyebrow didn’t drop from its risen position. “Forgive me if that, to my ears, sounds rather unlikely.”

“Tell me, sir, are you a betting stallion?” I smirked.

“I only gamble with my life, never with bits.”

“Who said that I’m wagering money? How about this: if I can improvise a flawless prelude and fugue, then you must come to my opera on Hearts and Hooves day. But if I can’t then, I’ll write an opera about everypony in this room, and do it in a week.”

“What’s an opera?” Flash inquired.

“It’s like a play only the actors on stage sing throughout,” the blond prince explained. “And trust me, they can certainly drag on longer than they’re intended to, even if the whole thing is in Equestrian.”

Star Swirl hummed in thought. “You’re rather confident about this, aren’t you?”

I nodded, “More than just confident, I know I can do it.”

“Either way, it’d be nice ta hear some music,” Mage said.

And just like that, he agreed to the bet.


One trip to the toilet later to relieve myself from all the beer and ale I had drunk that morning, I headed over to the music salon. A place that I had come to know very well in the eighth century. That particular room was the place where I first met Princess Sunbutt; just to be there was considered a high honor for any musician that had caught the attention of the royal family.

Celestia had told me that they’d meet me in the “old music room” to hear me play. No doubt she had to show them the way; still, they got there before me. Before I could set hoof in there, I was brimming in confidence in showing a pioneering wizard what a genius like me could do.

However, before I could do so, I heard Star Swirl’s voice saying, “Between you and me Celestia, I don’t quite grasp why someone like Master Moztrot is here.”

“That’s because I invited him,” Celestia replied.

“Don’t think that I don’t see your generosity, but doesn’t it make him seem out of place considering what we’re here celebrating?” I paused at this. “He said so himself that he’s from the eighth century, and we have been gone for a thousand years. I’m sure that you have a reason for inviting him here today.”

“Truth be told – I feel sorry for him.”

“In what way?”

I heard her take a calming breath, “Unlike us and your pillars, Mr. Moztrot is truly alone. While all of us have a connection in that we grew up around in the same time period, despite the cultures we came from, Wolfgang doesn’t have that luxury. He’s the only one. As much as we may tell him that it’s the year 1,007, in his head, it’s still 791. As much as I’m impressed by how he’s been able to adapt and make friends with his staff, he has no living relatives. The same goes for his friends in the past; even if there were descendants, I highly doubt they would be like the same ponies that he made friends with. He may not show it, but he’s lonely. I invited him here today, not just because of the fact that he has nopony to celebrate Hearth’s Warming with, but all of you know what it’s like by now to be displaced in a world that has changed significantly. While Moztrot’s music is making a revival, fame won’t be enough for his well-being.”

“So he needs friends?” Rock Hoof inquired.

“I think it would help in a way. What he needs is connections to those that won’t make him feel isolated.”

“But you do know that there’s a problem in your logic, Princess,” Star Swirl pointed out. “I don’t know if we could connect with him. As you said, he too is from a different time period that any of us are familiar with.”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Flash interjected. “The guy has a unique sense of humor, has a catchy drinking song and he can hold his alcohol, I mean what’s not to like about him?”

“And when you hear him play,” Celestia added, “I think that music wise, he might be on the same level as you are.”

“I doubt it,” Star Swirl replied. “I have lent an ear to some modern music and I can’t exactly say that I’m impressed. So, I hope you would understand why if I find this Moztrot could impress me.”

Cueing my entrance, I pranced in, “Oh ye of little faith, if I didn’t think that I could, would be this competent?”

He sighed and he held up cotton balls in his aura, “And do you think I would have these if I didn’t doubt it?”

“I don’t think you’ll be needing those,” I went over to the keyboard, opening the lid. “Here, I’ll let you give me a theme that I can improvise on.”

With the other ponies gathered around the piano, the wizard lifted a hoof, “How about I give you two themes to use? One for the prelude and the other for the fugue – or is that a little too much for you?”

“By all means, let’s hear them.” So he did; he constructed two melodies in C Major and then he stepped back. “Good luck,” said he as he folded his forelegs.

I sat there for a solid two minutes, putting the themes together like a puzzle. I expanded, shrunk, turned them upside-down and even changed their key signature in my head. A quick listen in my mind I build the themes for both the prelude and fugue, making sure they wouldn’t clash with any of the voices required. With a nod, I placed my hooves on the keyboard.

At first, I started slowly in adagio, giving the first few bars some extra chords and trills. For the first minute, all seemed calm and unchallenging; a quick glance at the wizard showed that he was indeed unimpressed. However, I smirked as I knew he was in for a surprise. Just when it looked that the prelude had run out of energy, I let it pick up at an andante pace, giving my right hoof some gravitas while my left continued with the theme.

Ideas for variations came easily. One moment all was dark in A minor then the next, it was a busy pizzicato that climbed up and down the higher register. Each one expressed a different shade in color and texture like a painting. A fantasy in chords and emotion. As I looked over my shoulder, Star Swirl’s expression went from unimpressed to curious.

About six or so minutes in, he asked, “When are you going to begin the fugue?”

His answer came at the end of the variation I’d been performing, returning it all to C Major. For a moment, I impersonated Buch as I sat upright with a snooty mask on my face as I began the wizard’s second theme. From one voice, came two, then three and four voices that blended together in harmony, with not a note wrong with it. My greatest joy as I played out this improvised fugue was the look on Star Swirl’s face as it registered how flawless it all was. The theme rising and falling and weaving together to form this fugue might be on par with the Master of music himself. And I won a victory to see his doubt change into belief.

For the other living antiques, they could do nothing but stare as I played out the fugue while Celestia looked satisfied. And by the time I played out the final chords, so was I.

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