Dreams and Invective (Part 2) (Edited 07/23/20)
The Shadowbolts sat still, lost in a haze of guilt and self-doubt. They wondered what they could say to them. Many of them wanted to bring up the nice things he did, but that clearly didn't sway him in the slightest. How can they prove they changed?
"Do you really want me to be honest?" Sugarcoat at last asked. Sunny and her friends felt nervous, since Sugarcoat was using her blunt voice. The one she used when saying a pretty nasty truth.
"OK, be honest," Shining said unhappily.
"Dealing with Twilight was like banging my head against a brick wall," Sugarcoat said. Lemon Zest lightly kicked Sugarcoat on the shin, but she continued regardless. "Your sister was one of the most annoying, awkward, and obnoxious-"
"Sugarcoat!" Sour scolded. "What is wrong with-"
"He wants the truth," Sugarcoat said plainly, "I'm gonna give him the truth. That's exactly how we felt about her."
"But-,"
"No, I want to here was she has to say," Shining said. Oddly enough, he didn't sound remotely upset by Sugarcoat's words. He sounded curious. "Now Sugarcoat, please tell me why you found my sister to be all those things."
"Every time you talked to her, she was always looking away, she was always going off into tangents," Sugarcoat continued. The rest of the Shadowbolts were mortified by Sugarcoat's remarks, with Sunny's face falling into her hands. "I remember one time she asked me about my day, and then she started talking about ionic fields," Sugarcoat's lip pursed with frustration. "She was always showing off in front of the teachers and making us look bad. She was complete athletic failure." Sugarcoat took a short breath, before continuing. "Socially speaking, she was a complete train wreck."
"And it never occurred to you to just...tap her on the shoulder and tell her she was doing something wrong," Shining said in a neutral voice.
"So wait." Sugarcoat with some anger. "Who's the older sibling? Me or you?" Shining was taking aback by that question. "I didn't really feel responsible for someone like that. I'm sorry to tell you this, Mr. Armor teenagers don't want to be friends with people like that . You would willingly be friends with someone like that?" Sugarcoat asked Shining, her tone stern and uncompromising. "How many awkward people did you go out of your way to befriend when you were our age?" Sugarcoat asked. Shining continued to look at Sugarcoat with a stunned look. "Mr. Armor, tell me how many socially inept did you include in your friend circle when you were in high school?" Shining looked stunned, unable to respond. "I'm not trying to excuse our behavior. But, I'm gonna tell you now, I am not inclined to be near people like that, let alone hold their hand."
,
"If this how you feel," Shining said in a quiet voice ,"then why do you want to search for her so badly?"
"I realize that how...we behaved wasn't...much better," Sugarcoat said, sounding almost chocked up.
"And what you made you realize that?" Shining Armor said in a tone that was both soft and stern.
"Well," Sunny began. "You know about...Juniper right?"
"Yeah," Shining said.
"Well," Sunny said. "When she first came here, none of us really liked her or wanted her around us." The Shadowbolts grimaced, remembering with shame about how they were all too eager to throw Juniper under the bus. The very thought of doing that was almost impossible to imagine now. "She acted a lot like Twilight: she was a wimp, she was annoying, she showed off in front of the teachers, and she talked about stupid facts."
"So why did you hang out with her?" Shining asked.
"The only reason why we hung out with Juniper was because your wife told us to," Indigo said remorsefully. Shining didn't look remotely surprised. "And because Sunny...made us."
"You see," Sunny said, "I felt horrible about what I did. I mean, back then, I didn't understand how much of a jerk I really was. But I had a whole lot of guilt, and I didn't know what to do. So I went to church, and told my priest a little bit about what happened." She took a deep breath. "He told me the way for me to make it to Twilight was...being nicer to someone like Twilight." She let out a small smile. "But the truth was, I only saw Juniper as a way to feel better. I didn't really want to be her friend. I was almost ready to ditch her after her first day."
"Why did you change your mind?"
"Cadence told us about all the cool things that Twilight did," Sunny said. "How she built a treehouse when she was 12, how she figured out her college credits even before she learned how to drive, the story about how she dove into a pool to save Spike," Sunny said with a smile, but stopped when she realized she was making Shining more miserable. "The point is, there was a whole other side to Twilight I didn't bother to find out about, so I figured maybe...Juniper might have a whole other side to her."
"And, well, she did," Lemon Zest said with a small smile, "she had a really great voice, she chugged a whole bottle of hot sauce, she went to all these different countries, she's a mean pillow fighter. She even became friends with Sapphire Shores."
"Sapphire Shores," Shining mused. "That name sounds familiar. I think I've heard her on the radio a few times."
"She graduated last year," Sour said. "She's like a celebrity now. She's the coolest person and Crystal Prep. And...Sapphire liked June."
"And she was kind of a wimp," Indigo said, "but with some training from me, she's in much better shape. Not only is she going to the gym with me, she's doing mixed martial arts," she finished, sounding like a proud parent.
"And its thanks to her big brain that we know Twilight was alive," Sunny said.
"The point is, Juniper turned out to be a really good person when she was given a chance," Sugarcoat said in a solemn voice. "And I realize if we gave Twilight a chance, she could've been the same way."
"Yeah. But that wasn't the only reason we realized we were wrong," Sunny said.
"What was the other reason?" Shining asked.
"Well," Sunny said uneasily, rubbing her arm. "After I went to your house, I really wanted to be Juniper's friend, but I didn't really understand what it was like to be a loyal friend. There was one girl who really, really didn't like her."
"Was it the girl who dumped rotten milk on you?" Shining asked.
"Yeah, Suri," Sunny said uneasily. "She was also the girl who humiliated Twilight at that party with the paint." Shining's eyes narrowed a bit. "She was the girl who hated Twilight more than anyone else. She's the person who led everyone into hating her. I mean, I knew deep down that it was wrong, but no one wanted want to stand up to her."
"Because she was the most popular girl in school?" Shining asked.
"She was also...our friend since kindergarten," Sunny said uneasily.
"We knew her longer than we knew Twilight," Sugarcoat said with a hint of shame. "I'm not trying to excuse giving into her, but she also was loaded and had connections-,"
"She was more useful to you than my sister ever was," Shining said simply. It wasn't said with anger, but sad acceptance.
"Yeah," Sugarcoat said, sounding utterly drained.
"Suri hated Juniper as much as she hated Twilight," Sunny said. "And when I invited her to that party, Suri got mad. So...I lied and told Suri that Juniper whined to Cadence for an invitation." Shining looked at her with a small amount of scorn.
"I knew it was wrong," Sunny said with a quiver, "But I thought that if I could make Juniper cool, Suri would like her as well." She clenched her fists. "But Suri...just hated her. It wasn't that she was annoyed by Juniper. It was...like...Suri saw Juniper like she was a cockroach. Even when she did cool things." She took a deep breath.
"Because of my lie," Sunny said regretfully. "Suri tried to dump rotten milk on Juniper's head."
"And then we found out she drew this really horrible picture of Juniper fucking a pig," Indigo said, still furious over that, "and put it in her locker". Even Shining Armor looked a little bit shocked.
"So that's when you decided to boot Suri out," Shining said, remembering what Cadence said. "She turned out to be...just horrible."
"Yeah, but Juniper still found out about my lie," Sunny said on the verge of tears. "I thought she was gonna hate me for what I did." The other Shadowbolts also looked utterly ashamed. "She was really mad at me, but then she hugged me and told me it was OK, and that she forgave me."
"And then," Indigo said, "she saved Coco. Coco was kind of Suri's lackey. Coco helped Suri with her pranks. Juniper was really mad at Coco for what she did. But when Suri attacked Coco the next morning, because she wanted revenge, Juniper was the one who saved her life," Indigo said with a proud smile."Even when Suri knocked of June's glasses, she still beat her into the ground to save Coco." Shining's eyes widened in surprise.
"And then, we had to tell her about...what we did during the Friendship Games," Sour said, also cracking up. "And, even though she was upset, she still hung out with us even when she knew how horrible we were."
"And then, those Wondercolts," Sunny said, "also hated for what we did. They didn't want to let us make up for what we did. But still, Cadence and the other Twilight begged them to give us a chance. And they did."
"And I remember we went to a party at Canterlot High," Sour said, rubbing her arm. "Everyone treated us the same way we treated our Twilight. At one girl was so angry with us, she said we should've dropped dead. But the other Twilight stood up for us and said that we deserved a second chance."
"And, when I thought that we drove Twilight to suicide," Indigo Zap said uneasily, "I was so angry, that I sent myself to the hospital." She saw Shining's glare. "I'm not saying that to get you to feel sorry for me. I'm saying that because...Pinkie Pie baked me a cake. She was really mad about how mean we were, but she still wanted to make sure I was OK."
"And when Cadence called us into the room after the Friendship Games," Lemon Zest said, tears flowing back into her eyes, "I thought she was gonna yell at us. I thought she was gonna blow up at us. But instead...she hugged us and told us it wasn't our fault."
"I see," Shining said some contempt. "You're saying that everyone forgave you, so that means I have to."
"No," Sugarcoat said. "I'm saying....that's how we should've been to our Twilight." Shining frowned a bit. "I'm not gonna lie and pretend Twilight wasn't obnoxious and annoying. I'm saying...there were better ways to deal with it," Sugarcoat's lip quivered a bit. "We screwed up far, far worse than Twilight ever did. But people still gave us a chance, even when they were mad at us. I realize now that...even though Twilight was annoying, treating her like a lost cause and making her feel miserable was wrong," Sugarcoat began crying, "It was wrong of us to make her cry, to treat to her like trash, and make her feel alone, and I'm-I'm, sorry," Sugarcoat finally broke down, as did the rest of her friends. After a few moments of crying, they got themselves under control. Shining looked more and more morose as they finished.
"Did Twilight really act like that?" Shining asked Sugarcoat after a few moments. He didn't sound angry. His question sounded more like a plea. "Did she really behave that way?"
"Yeah," Sugarcoat said. Shining Armor got up from the table and looked out the window.
"Before she came to Crystal Prep, our psychiatrist told us that Crystal Prep wasn't for her," Shining said tears forming out of his eyes. "Our therapist said that she needed to be people...like her. Told her she was autistic, and she wouldn't fit in." To the shock of the Shadowbolts, Shining's words weren't directed at them, but seemed to be directed at himself. "But...I was so obsessed with her being at Crystal Prep, following in my footsteps, that I didn't listen." Tears started flowing out of his eyes, and he fall back into his chair. "She was miserable, and I didn't care, she was upset and I didn't care." Shining mused. "She had problems, but instead of dealing with them, I ignored them." His voice started cracking up. "I cared more about the girl I wanted her to be than the girl in front of me." His lip started quivering. "But I realize now, I've been angry at you....for doing the things that I should've been doing," Shining stopped and soon he started crying himself. For a few minutes, he bawled and bawled. He stopped when he found someone placed a hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw Sour looking at him with kind eyes.
"You know, when I was ten years old," Sour said. "My mom wanted me to be a ballerina."
"So," Shining said, still whimpering.
"I hated being a ballerina!" Sour bellowed. "But my mom made me do it anyways."
"And my mom tried to make me take one of those manners courses," Indigo said, also walking to Shining, and putting a comforting shoulder on the other man's hand. "I thought the course was stupid."
"And my dad signed me up for skiing, even though I hate winter sports," Sugarcoat said. The other Shadowbolts came up to the desk with comforting looks.
"The point is," Sunny said empathetically. "All parents make their kids do things they hate. All parents do that because they think they're right. Your not a bad brother. You just made the mistake all parents make."
"She was miserable," Shining said with self-loathing. "And I told her she was being silly."
"It isn't like you expected this to happen," Lemon Zest said. "You thought Crystal Prep would be as cool for her as was for you. Maybe it wasn't our jobs to teach her things, but like Sugar said, we could've been a little nicer to her."
"And besides, her parents died unexpectedly," Sugarcoat said, her blunt voice being kind. "It's not like you could've known how to be the perfect dad overnight."
"I still ignored her," Shining said.
"And we did too," Indigo said.
"I guess we're both guilty of that," Shining said solemnly. After a few deep breaths, the man brought himself under control.
"OK," Shining said.
"OK, what?" Lemon Zest said.
"OK, you can help look for my sister," Shining said. A small smile appeared on their faces. "Look, I'm still mad at you," Shining said with a small glare. "But I realize you five do want to be better. You've also been honest with me. And," his morose expression returned, "a lot of this was my own fault. That's why I can't be too mad at you."
"But we still have to find her," Indigo said with unshakeable resolve. "Whatever mistakes you made, we screwed up far worse."
"And I promise you," Sunny said with pleading eyes, "that we will nicer to her. We will be better friends to her." Shining didn't look pleased.
"There's one more thing," Shining said in a serious tone. "I understand your sorry, but after everything I've learned, I'm not gonna send her back to school with you." The Shadowbolts looked upset. "The fact that your sorry doesn't erase what you did to her. I don't want to send her back to a place where she was abused. This all happened because I didn't listen to her, and the only way I can make it right is by doing what I've should've done, and taking her out if she wants too"
"That's fair," Lemon Zest said sadly. "I mean, we do deserve it." The Shadowbolts also quietly accepted this.
"But if she forgives you," Shining said," then she can go back to school with you. But I'm not gonna force her to forgive you. Cadence told her to turn the other cheek, and...this is what happened." He let out a small frown. "Like I said, after breaking her trust, you have to earn her forgiveness back. And if she wants nothing to do with you, you have to accept it. But don't let that stop you from being better people." He let out another sigh. "OK, you girls can go to class now. I said what I had to say."
Soon the Shadowbolts piled out of the room solemnly, except for Lemon Zest who stood in the room.
"Can I ask you a question," Lemon said meekly.
"Yeah," Shining said.
"Can I come over to your house," Lemon Zest said, "and together, we can, like, brainstorm ways to make it up to her?" For the first time since he spoke to them, a real smile appeared on Shining's face.
"Sure," Shining said kindly.
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Incredible work. Shining desperately needed that closure. This is coming together nicely. Keep going!!
Very nice
I'm glad I read these two chapters together. I would have been really pissed at Shining if I had only read the first part, given how he went after the girls while completely ignoring his own mistakes. It took some bashing over the head, but he's finally admitted to someone else that he screwed up too. But they've all made important steps here.
That is an interesting restriction on Luna, and is a creative way to avoid instant resolution.
10251686
Shining hasn't really gotten closure. Yes, he has gotten rid of some of the animosity he feels for the Shadowbolts, but he still lies awake at night, wondering what has become of his sister in a world he knows nothing about.
10251758
Thank you.
10251888
I originally was gonna wait a week to publish this for purposes of suspense, but I decided I really wanted to get this part out of the way.
I understand that Shining Armor comes across as an angry jerk. But I felt it would've been unrealistic for him to come around so quickly. I wanted it, like the Shadowbolts learning to be more tolerant people, to be something that happens through a combination of time, growth, and a bit of prodding.
But this is just a first step.
I want to avoid a resolution that requires a single spell to solve. If it would've been solved that way, then the Elements would have revived human Twilight without much fuss.
That is an interesting restriction on Luna, and is a creative way to avoid instant resolution.
10251436
I guess its just my philosophy that hatred, no matter the reason or how justified it is, is too exhausting to hold onto. He actually frightened me with what he was saying.
10252108
Uh....
Not to get into a debate, but I don't think life is that simple. Like all emotions, hatred is a part of all of us. The question is, how much do you let it consume you.
Twilight, under Cadence's advice, did not react at all to the bullying that she went through. Because of that, it just got worse and worse.
Juniper's hatred for Suri is what motivated her to put her in her place once and for all. Canter Zoom's barely masked hatred for CPA's schoolboard meant he had the strength to protect her niece from their machinations.
There are moments where you do need to feel hatred. The issue is not letting it consume you to the point you hurt someone who did nothing to you.
10252352
My own personal experience coloring my opinions, I suppose. I've never personally encountered anyone that inspired such utter rancor in me, and my hatred for people I can't do anything about (certain people in the U.S. government) without resources I don't have just leaves me tired and wondering what the point of getting mad was.
It doesn't change the fact that this is an incredibly enjoyable story that I look forward to reading every time it shows up.
10252386
Well, there are people who do inspire such hatred. And sometimes...non-violence and turning the other cheek isn't really an option.
One specific example are the Pashas: the perpetrators of the Armenian Genocide. These men had committed unspeakable crimes against millions of Armenians, Greeks, and Assyrians. They didn't just kill people. They destroyed ancient communities that had lasted for centuries.
None of them, in the end, faced in international trial. Largely because Turkey was able to beat back occupation under the resistance of Ataturk. Which was good for Turkey, but it meant Armenian civilization was forever destroyed in Anatolia.
One of the Pashas was shot by an Armenian nationalist in Berlin. The court sympathized with the Armenian man, and he was let go.
Do you think the Armenian man was wrong to do what he did? Do you think he shouldn't have taken revenge? My belief is revenge and hate do have their place, but only as a last resort, and only when other options fail you, and only when your revenge doesn't hurt others.
10252407
I never said that I believed in non-violence and turning the other cheek in all things. I don't believe in revenge. Revenge lessens everyone involved.
That being said, I'd call what happened to that Pasha simple Justice.
In context of the story, I believe that Scitwi would be in the right if she defended herself and, like, broke Sour Sweet's jaw with a right hook or something like that. Midnight Sparkle would be revenge, and something I'm against.
I don't support hatred. Hatred cripples the soul. I do believe in appropriately directed anger.
I don't support revenge. Revenge never makes you feel better. I do believe in seeking justice.
But that's just how I feel. i won't try to change your mind either way, and I don't think I'm better or worse for the way I feel.
10252425
I think a different situation requires a different remedy.
Sci-Twi's situation wasn't solved by turning the other cheek.
I think the Shadowbolts and Cinch deserved at least a punch in the throat for their behavior.
10253551
Are you planning sending the Shadowbolts to Equestria to search for Twilight? In a world where the magic of Friendship is as real as physics, five friends looking for redemption and their missing one may have a better chance than princess Twilight herself.
Is the Cutie Map still online?
10255860
Well...you'll see.
"And, when I thought that we drove Twilight to suicide," Indigo Zap said uneasily, "I was so angry, that I sent myself to the hospital." He saw Shining's glare.
She
10482698
Made the correction.
What did you think of the chapter?
say to him*
nice things they did,*
want to hear what she*
was a complete athletic failure."*
with people like that.*
hold their hand!"*
voice,*
what made you*
make it up to Twilight*
person at Crystal Prep.*
wanted to stand*
locker."*
knocked off*
Twilight. This one girl*
needed to meet people... like her.*
Sometimes I wish all parents were like that, mine too.
Thx Shinning Armor.