Winter Night Under a Starless Sky

It's a fresh start for Starlight. New city, new school, new job, new everything. If only she could find new purpose as well.

Created for the 2019 Jinglemas event as a gift for NaiadSagaIotaOar.
I hope I did them justice.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 5 )

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NaiadSagaIotaOar

NaiadSagaIotaOar #1 · Dec 23rd, 2019 · 1 · ·

Thanks so much for writing this! Apologies for not commenting earlier, I read through part of this yesterday but got distracted and couldn't finish and wanted to read through the whole thing so I could comment on lots of things about it I'm glad to hear I made someone watch Rainbow Rocks, to me that's to this day one of the highlights of the FiM generation of MLP. And, erm. I hope you enjoyed the later Aria-containing EqG bits more than I did.

The uniforms looked cute, so there was that, but she wasn’t sure what was the purpose of making the staff look like elves other than scream “We’re capitalising on the holiday spirit!” though perhaps they hoped that by being so blatant the customers would find some sort of delight in the refreshing honesty of it all. At least the cooks hadn’t been forced to dress like reindeers or something like that.

This is a really nice opening! Or sort of close to opening I guess. Whatever. But I like how it takes that sort of disillusionment with the status quo that defined Equestria Starlight in her first appearances and transfers it to a new environment. But then in the human world there's not a concrete symbol of that status quo stamped on everyone, so of course it follows that this Starlight feels a little aimless by comparison. Great stuff!

Cakes were horrible.

This is a profane travesty of a sentiment >:B got a good giggle out of it tho :D

I'm not seeing quite as many, like, single bits that stood out to me once Aria comes into the scene, but I really like what you did with her. She's nice and introspective--and maaaybe opens up a little more easily than I'd have liked, but I think I can let that slide given the context. And I love how her perceptiveness is highlighted; I've always liked to picture her as being a bit trapped in Adagio's shadow, which would naturally mean she does a lot of kind of watching from the sidelines, and that translates so well to her picking up a lot of things from people without interacting much.

Overall, really nice stuff! I'll admit I was ready to be let down since I've read so many Aria stories that missed the mark, but this was lovely Thanks again for writing it, and I really hope you enjoyed your own gift too

Zaid ValRoa

Zaid ValRoa #2 · Dec 23rd, 2019 · 1 · ·

10001077
I'm glad you liked it!
I agree that Aria opened up too quickly. My original outline had a couple more bits with her in that conversation, but I felt they made the scene drag a bit. Overall, I think I did as well as I could've considering I this is my first EqG story and just first human MLP story in general.
I'm happy I managed to do a decent job with Aria. I watched Rainbow Rocks and a couple other shorts on a Sunday while taking notes, and then read a couple of Aria fics to get a good grasp on her character. Loved your Sunset/Aria fics, by the way..
Anyway, yeah. I'm glad you liked it. This was a great experience, and I'll be sure to try again next year.

SigmasonicX

SigmasonicX #3 · Dec 25th, 2019 · 1 · ·

This was a nice story. You did a good job at incorporating the Equestria Girls dimension version of Starlight, and both she and Aria were handled well. And nice that this got you to watch Rainbow Rocks, haha.

BorealStargazer

BorealStargazer #4 · Dec 31st, 2019 · 1 · ·

I don't feel like Aria was too fast to open. She's too easily lost in Adagio's shadow as a less-charismatic sidekick. Without Adagio taking the spotlight or Sonata to joke on, she had time for herself and I liked what I saw. There is a nice bit of personality there.

A set of irritating customers to illustrate the frustration is rather... trope-y, but it's just a background, the main focus is chemistry between the characters, and that was good.

FyreWright