• Member Since 29th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen 12 hours ago

Learn for Life


Comments ( 20 )

What will gonna to happen to fluttershy in the next chapter?

8345467
I honestly don't know all of the details, but I will say more of the same that's already happened.

The part I like best is when Fluttershy tries to get out from under the flow, but the bee just shoves her back and makes her drink some more.

:derpytongue2: Oh, I know how the next chapter’s gonna go! :derpytongue2: Fluttershy’s accidentally fallen in with a cell of bee revolutionaries. These drones want to overthrow the old queen and rule the hive themselves, with Fluttershy as their puppet queen. First, they need to fill her with honey until she’s big enough to pass for a bee...

This both a personal attack and a blessing. I can never find good honey stuff, and it's worth best poney, and it's big fatty stuff two?! This amazing, and as usual, tour writing is top notch. I already want a sequel, an animated series, and three crappy DS games

8345815
Don't ask for a sequel yet! There's still two more chapters to get through. Hope to see you there!

8345554
Mate, this is my first foray into a fully-fledged inflation story. I can't have that sophisticated a plot quite yet. But if you'd like to do that, then feel free.

You telling me there's moar coming?! Sweeeeeet.

8346550
It wasn't intentional, but I got too much into the first part, and deadline came up. Hopefully this first chapter was good.

8346980
Honestly it felt like it could be a standalone story just by itself, more is like icing on the cake! So yeah, I'd say it's good!

Edit made: Chapter 1, I took out an instance of the drone blinking, as bees can't blink.

8345554
Why not just have the honey contain mutagenic properties and have this be a part of a ploy to use flutters as a means of communicating with ponykind thus convincing ponies to trade with them and turning the entirety of pony kind into bees...which are actually a mutant form of changeling that drank to much love from zebra's thus causing stripes to appear and eventually leading to the eventual bee genetics.

This mechanic is based on the Season 6 finale reveal and the fact that Thorax's mutation isn't the first one.

Can't wait for both new installments!

fun read so far

Gotta love the setup for that last scene. Inflation caused by miscommunication or accidents is simply the best.

Fluttershy’s portrayal in this whole story is amusing. I get the impression that on some level she wants to become huge, but her inhibitions stop her from admitting this or acting on it. Except all these opportunities and accidents are enough to overcome her inhibitions, or at least make her not fight back as hard as she thinks she should.

Also love that ambiguous ending. How long does it take before Fluttershy’s friends come to find her? How big does she get before they arrive? I know what answer I prefer...

and for a moment she wondered if they were anacondas there to keep her company.

That’s a wonderful Fluttershy moment right there. That when the topic of snakes comes up, she thinks of them as friends first and foremost.

A few more minutes passed, and she felt like a sock fresh out of the dryer was wrapped around her hooves. Then it felt like a vice was being wrapped around them, slowly getting tighter and tighter.
...
What had once been her withers crept over the top of her head, like a kitty cat was trying to climb on and get a good spot to sleep.

Some great similes right there. Imagery like this is what keeps a story from being a bland recitation of events.

I made Fluttershy talk normally throughout, and I couldn't replicate "tubby speak," or when a person's dialogue is hindered by their cheeks. "Thunk yu vury munch" instead of "Thank you very much" and the like. That it my image of the story, and I didn't deliver.

I didn’t mind the absence here. I’m not a fan of tubby speak in general; I just tolerate it when other authors include it.

I'd say for a first effort it turned out pretty well all things considered. As for being unhappy with the final product, I think all creative types are like that to an extent.

Great work! It turned out really well, methinks, especially for your first inflation story. The pacing is, in my opinion, really sweet and entirely fitting for the theme of the plot (heh). This is absolutely a good start if you ever want to do another one of these! :D

I really loved this story, you have some great descriptions

This fic is even more amusing now, in light of “A Health of Information”...

The insect equivalent to hoofs are tarsen

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