• Member Since 26th Aug, 2016
  • offline last seen 8 hours ago

CAPTAIN YOSHI HD


E

Sweetie Belle wants to do something. And what does she do? She goes to the beach with her sister and they have some fun.

A rewrite of https://www.fimfiction.net/story/374249/at-the-beach by https://www.fimfiction.net/user/253853/Evictus.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 6 )

Your descriptions, title, and cover art are all vague. You need to replace those with something that'll grab the attention of the readers here. Like, what happens at the beach? Anything bad happen?

And you rewrote one of Evictus' stories? Lol

8474237
well, if you read the story, you will know.

8474331
What is there to attract me, or any other reader to the story, though? You tell us they go to the beach; that pretty much sums it up.

Thanks for the rewrite!

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