Natural Emotions

by MetalJrock

Autumn Discussion

It was really starting to bug me even more than usual now. This sudden feeling in my chest everytime I even thought of so much as the name Sunset Shimmer. And it all came down on me that one Summer evening. None of it made sense.

So, I did what any sane pony would do... I researched it, looked at every guide to friendship Twilight owned in that library. Every book I could possibly get my hooves on. I visited her as often as I could before the Summer ended to see if things remained the same for me. I had to figure out what made this different than being with Twilight, Spike, Trixie, or Sunburst as friends. Otherwise, it probably would've literally torn me apart from the inside just by not knowing.

Luckily, I had a caring mentor willing to help me figure things out when I nearly lost my mind.

---

Season 3: Autumn Discussions

Rain poured from outside Starlight Glimmer's window, leaving extreme wind, thunder and lightning in its wake. The Running of the Leaves was only two weeks ago, and the autumn chill began to make itself known. The sky was a dull gray and dull colored leaves began to blow onto her window as a result before vanishing in the wind like always. Nopony was outside today.

This gave the unicorn an excuse to refocus her efforts on discovering the meaning behind these new feelings she was having towards Sunset. For the past month she had been reading everything she can in the library of the castle to even get a clue or something. But nothing answered her questions, her dilemma. And it was driving her up a wall at this point, having been working nonstop all day.

In fact, she had been at this for a while, spacing her life and tending to finding the answers she desires at some point.

"Come on!"

She slammed another book closed and rolled up another paper with her magic, crunching it up before throwing it in the trash can with the other failed papers. Her eyes wandered to the magic journal, and she let out a sharp groan at her disappointment. Her hooves reached for her head and her face planted on the desk. "Ugh! Nothing! Again!" she shouted in annoyance.

A soft knock could be heard on Starlight's door, her small rage dimming down, "...Starlight?" came the voice of her mentor, Twilight Sparkle, "Is everything okay?"

"Y-Yeah!" Starlight replied in a cheery tone, hoping Twilight wouldn't decide to intrude on her matters.

"..." silence came from the alicorn, "I'm not buying it, Starlight. You've been couped up in there all day, I can hear your groans of frustration three rooms over." she said, "I'm just worried about you is all."

Starlight paused, and bit her lip, and looked to the pile of worthless papers then to the stack of books. With a defeated sigh, the unicorn simply replied, "Yes..."

With that said, her door creaked open and walked in Twilight Sparkle, concern evident in her eyes, and then the alicorn spotted her 'research' as she called it, "What's been going on with you lately, Starlight? You've been in here reading book after book and sounding more frustrated for the past month. And this large stack of papers..." she noticed, her voice calm yet firm.

"Nothing...? A f-friendship lesson?" Starlight gulped, hoping her teacher wouldn't pry any further.

Twilight shook her head at the thinly-covered lie, "I'm not going to force you to explain... But I wish you did. You know you can trust me with anything right?" she asked her student. Starlight slowly nodded at that question, knowing deep down it was true. "I promise that whatever is said in here won't be shared."

The unicorn's eyes bolted across the room, then back to the magic book with the sun on the front. She closed her eyes, using her magic to close the door for privacy, "...Fine." she exhaled, "But you have to keep your word... None of this leaves this room." she demanded. She saw the alicorn give an assuring nod in silence.

"It's... A-About Sunset." Starlight finally revealed.

Twilight tilted her head at that, sitting herself on her student's bed, "What about her?"

Starlight groaned, "That's just it, Twilight! I don't know! Everytime I'm near, when I so much as think about her... It doesn't make sense to me! What am I feeling and why?"

"..." Twilight paused, "What is it about her that makes you feel... the way you do?" she wondered.

"She's smart, forgiving, funny... Confident... She's known the pain of redeeming for her mistakes and what it takes to earn the trust of others and able to pick herself up from that face... I can relate to that well... And I'll admit she's kinda cute." Starlight blurted out at last, as if a huge weight had been lifted from her chest for some reason.

The alicorn paused, "And you don't feel this way about any other pony?" she asked.

Starlight shook her head, "I love Trixie, Sunburst, Spike, all of you, believe me I do... But Sunset makes me feel different, like nothing else matters when I'm around her and only seeing her happy does..." she held the side of her head as her eyes widened, "Am I neglecting my other friends, Twilight? I can't have or pick a favorite! Oh, now I feel like a jerk..." she sat on her bed. "I knew I never changed."

Twilight frowned and wrapped a wing around Starlight, "You're not a jerk, Starlight... Far from it, actually. You love all your friends dearly still, and there's no such thing as picking favorites." a knowing grin formed on her muzzle, "In fact, I think I may have a small answer to your dilemma." she revealed.

Hearing those words, the unicorn wiped a stray tear from her eye, "Y-You do?"

"It's something Cadance explained to me many times over the years, and an emotion I once felt for someone in that world: I think you have a crush on Sunset Shimmer." Twilight finally deduced.

Starlight blushed upon hearing that, "What!? N-No, I don't! What are you talking about?!" her hoof stomped the bed as she tried to deny this, her voice studdering. "S-So what if I think she's cool, smart, and pretty. Or the fact that everytime I see her I get this weird feeling in my stomach everytime I look at her? I feel that way about all my friends...!" she added with a light squeak, her eyes darting over to the magic book once more.

Twilight's smile grew slightly at her denial and Starlight's face darkened from embarassment, "I've never heard you gush about your other friends like that before. There's nothing wrong with it, Starlight. Trust me." she eased her student, her wing never unwrapping from Starlight to calm her nerves. "It doesn't mean you think of us any less..." she said in a calm tone.

Starlight frowned, "But I'm still learning about friendship... If I do have a crush on her... That's a big jump to make." she gulped nervously at the idea. "I-I don't think I can handle that easily, especially knowing my track record with friendship."

"If you do..." the alicorn began, "...Then I can trust you to make the right decisions on this. You've already learned so much about friendship, and you and Sunset are both capable of figuring things out together."

"Can we not s-share this with her, please?" suggested the unicorn.

Twilight nodded and added, "Of course. I promised that much to you. You are right in that she's a lot like you though... But I don't add to what she already told you out of privacy. I'll just say the two of you recovered better than ever from your mistakes and I'm honored to have the two of you learning friendship under my wing..." she grinned at her accidental wordplay, "Literally."

Starlight let out a snicker and jabbed Twilight's shoulder playfully, "Oh come on, that was forced."

"I do mean it though." said the alicorn sternly, "The two of you get along fine and I'm sure something will come of it if you really do feel that way about her."

Sighing, the unicorn replied, "Maybe you're right..." a smirk grew on her muzzle now, "...So you have a crush?"

"..." Twilight blushed and smiled back, "Oh hush. You won't find out who he is."

Starlight replied with a knowing smirk, "I will next time we head to the Crystal Empire. He's a pretty nice guard." Twilight's eyes widened upon hearing that, and chose not to add to the conversation at hand now. "I knew it..." teased the student.

Comments

[jnear19]

Now all twilight needs to do is give starlight "The Talk".

[OmniFox]

Freaky Fall.

[ynfiltra]