• Published 30th Jul 2017
  • 1,802 Views, 48 Comments

Mister Lonely Heart 2: What We Leave Behind - Eskerata



Mister Lonely Heart is a changeling "Grievance Councelor", who imitates ponies that his clients have problems with. Applejack wants to say a few choice words to a relative. A dead relative.

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What We Choose To Keep

“There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside of you.” –Maya Angelou


My life didn’t take a turn for the better until I betrayed my mother. Since she was Queen Chrysalis, every pony I know has assured me that it was for the best that I and the rest of my hive deposed the one who gave me life. Even considering how cruel she was to other races, I sometimes missed her company.

Before King Thorax showed us a better way to live, by sharing our love instead of hoarding it, I had never known what loneliness was. After all, how can one feel adrift in the world when one is constantly surrounded by thousands of fellow changelings?

After my reformation, I moved to Ponyville to become what I call a “Grievance Councelor”. I use my shape-shifting abilities to look like ponies that my clients have problems with. Terrible bosses, treacherous husbands, that sort of thing. I struggle against a torrent of awful-tasting rage and sorrow in order to dine upon the delicious catharsis that comes after the emotional baggage that these ponies carry around slips away.

A few ponies know my real name, but I call myself Mister Lonely Heart. At first it was because after living a drab, unsatisfying life of a slave under Chrysalis’s strict rule, I craved the emotional connections with ponies that were denied me my entire life. The other reason, I later realized, was that the lonely-hearted were my most frequent clientele. Their lives were just as wretched as mine once was, but for seemingly countless reasons.

The pony that sat before me rubbed one foreleg against the other as she studied the padded wall in my office. “What’s with the wall, mister? Do ponies get real violent with you or somethin’?”

Smiling, I replied, “No, Applejack. Some of my clients sometimes have to hit something, other than me, in order to work out their aggression.“

“Ah don’t think you have to worry about that from me. My doctor told me to come to you because Ah kinda hurt myself.”

“Yes, I’ve read your doctor’s diagnosis. You apparently had a slight heart attack that was most likely brought on by excessive stress.”

Applejack leaned towards me, cupping a hoof to her muzzle conspiratually. “Nothin’ leaves this room, right? Ah don’t want Big Mac or any other family member knowin’ that Ah came here.”

“Don’t worry about a thing, Applejack. Just like with any doctor, I am legally bound by the laws of counselor and client privilege between us. Even if a client demands that I give up another client’s information, I cannot and will not comply. If I do, my business will be shut down.”

She nodded. “Great. So . . . uh, how do we start?”

“Tell me what’s on your mind. Where do you suppose your stress comes from?”

She turned her hat round and round in her hoofs as her eyes drifted to the carpet. “Well, Ah had been workin’ extra hard. Ah guess maybe that’s it?”

“In somepony as young as yourself?” I smiled warmly. “Come now.”

She chuckled, but with little mirth. “Ain’t you a flatterer? My doctor told me that you can imitate anypony Ah want, right?” She squirmed in her chair. “Even if it’s somepony who’s . . . passed on?”

I blinked. This was the first time anypony ever asked me that. “I . . . suppose I could do that. The thing is, I’m not so good with voices. And I need to see pictures of the pony you had in mind.”

“Kinda figured that. Thing is, it’s been nearly a decade since my parents died. Since my family’s real big on recallin’ important dates like birthdays an’ such, Ah’ve been thinkin’ a lot about mom and dad lately.”

“I’m assuming you want to say your goodbyes, then?”

Her brow wrinkled and I tasted a coppery whiff of anxiety. “Ah want to say a lot more than that. Can Ah come by tomorrow with my family album?”

“That will be fine. I hope I can help.”



* * *



The next day, Applejack handed me a thick, well worn, apple-themed photo album. She sat next to me and pointed out several pictures of her father, Bright Mac.

She turned a page. A large red pony was sitting next to Applejack as she held a newborn foal in her forelegs. “That’s Applebloom. The fella starin’ at me is my brother Big Mac.”

“Have you always lived on your apple farm?”

Holding her chin up high with pride, she replied, “No other place Ah’d rather be. Big Mac does most of the heavy liftin’, but when Granny Smith ain’t around, Ah’m the one runnin’ the show.”

One picture had a mare with a jar for a cutie mark. Her long brown curly hair flowed over her shoulders as she smiled for the camera. Applejack tapped the picture. “That’s my mom, Buttercup.”

This wasn’t the first time a client had brought photo albums to my office. It took a while for me to understand why ponies kept so much carefully organized memorabilia in their lives. During Chrysalis’s reign, changelings weren’t allowed to mourn our dead. We lived only for tomorrow, for the past, as well as our dead brethren, was always useless to hold onto. When you aren’t allowed to have a life of your own, that makes perfect sense.

Having no past means having no perspective. Having no perspective leaves only selfless obedience. Which is the only thing my queen wanted from her children.

But once I saw why these ponies held onto their past, I realized how selective their sentiments were. Twilight Sparkle once told me some local wisdom; We are defined not only by what we leave behind, but also by what we choose to keep.

Applejack asked, “So, are these pictures enough for you to look like my dad?” Her voice tightened slightly as she laid the album onto the floor between our chairs.

“I think so. If you’re sure you want to go through with this.” I made sure to look her straight in the eyes when I asserted, “There’s no shame in backing out.”

“Ah’ve been wantin’ to do this ever since Twilight told me how you helped her with her personal problems.” She shut her eyes, took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “Okay. Let’s do it.”

Keeping the album’s pictures firmly in mind, I let my magic’s green fire engulf me once again. Bright Mac had a light red mane and tail and bright yellow fur. His cutie mark was a cross-section of a green apple.

I quietly said, “I’m ready. You can open your eyes now.”

She snapped open her eyes and suddenly went weak in the knees. I could almost hear her heart pound. As she tried to swallow, tears slipped down her cheeks. Applejack’s lower lip trembled as her ears flattened.

“It’s as if you never left,” she whispered.

Trying to regain her composure, she got off of her chair and paced restlessly back and forth in front of me. In my line of work, that reaction is common among new clients.

“Okay.” She said with a tone of finality, as if winning an argument with herself. “Ah’ve been wantin’ to say this for ten years. Dad?”

I pricked up my new pony ears attentively.

“Ah’m sorry you and mom are dead.” Her breathing sped up. “Ah’m sorry that Ah was too frickin’ stubborn to stay near you in the orchard.”

She stamped a foot in frustration. “Ah’m so dang sorry that Ah was too scared to save you! You’re both dead because of me! Ah wasn’t brave enough! Ah wasn’t fast enough!” With a deep breath, Applejack screamed, “It’s all my fault that there’s just the four of us on our farm!”

The sudden acid-flavored wave of self-hatred almost made my disguise slip away. Concentrating even harder, I stayed quiet as Applejack pulled out some tissue from a nearby box and blew.

“Not a day goes by when Ah don’t miss you something’ fierce. Every day Ah check the river near my our farm to make sure those stupid beavers ain’t makin’ a new den. When an extra-large thunderstorm dumped a bunch of rainwater into the river, it busted a den wide open.”

Applejack wiped away her tears. “Ah had never seen a flash flood hit so fast in all my life. It slammed into you and mom like a freight train!” Sitting on her haunches, she pointed at me. “It only took a second for the water to reach your necks. Y-you both reached out to me, beggin’ me to help . . . “

A primal groan rose from deep within her. She wasn’t in my office anymore. Her green eyes wavered and lost focus.

“And Ah didn’t help!” she cried. “Ah was just too scared to move that A-ah let you slip away! All Ah had to do was reach out”-she held out both hooves at me-“and just grab you!”

She stared at the padded wall. Looking at me, I quickly cocked my head at it. In a few quick steps, she reached the wall and slammed her hooves into the thick padding. “But Ah didn’t! One stupid little moment of hesitation took you away!”

Applejack’s powerful blows made the paintings near the wall tremble. I could feel the vibrations through the floor. “Ah’d give anything to bring you back! So would Big Mac!”

The paddings held firm against her weakening blows, much to my relief. Applejack was sweating and sobbing as she slowly returned from the past. “Ah just hope that wherever you are, that you can forgive me. ‘Cause Ah don’t know how long it’ll take for me to forgive myself.”

Sliding down the wall, she slumped to the floor in an exhausted heap. She put her hooves over her eyes and wept. I sat down next to her, still in her father’s guise. The catharsis from her venting slipped out in a thin but delectable stream. Feasting on that rarest of emotions, I kept an eye on my client.

After a few minutes, she had calmed down a little. “Could you change back, mister?”

Complying, I said, “Just let it all out, Applejack. You’ve been holding onto this guilt for, what, nearly a decade?”

“Yeah, but it feels like a century. When Big Mac found me, mom and dad were long gone.” Struggling to sit up, she continued, “He asked me if Ah saw them.”

Choking back a sob, she looked at me. “Ah could have told him the truth, but Ah was just too ashamed of what Ah’d done. So Ah told him no.”

“He still doesn’t know the truth, does he?” I delicately asked.

Applejack slowly shook her head. “The biggest lie Ah ever told anypony is still my biggest secret. This is comin’ from what Ponyville thinks is the most honest pony around.”

“Are you feeling any better?”

“A little, yeah. Ah guess this guilt’s been eatin’ at me for so long, Ah just let it get worse without even realizin’ it. Workin’ harder and harder every year must have been comin’ from that guilt, you know?”

Nodding, I replied, “Ponies are often motivated by negative urges. One thing you have to tell yourself is that you were only a filly at the time of your parent’s deaths. What could you have possibly done?”

“Ah was strong enough to leave home while mom and dad were away at the local hospital for Applebloom’s birth. This was before Ah got my cutie mark and Ah wanted to get it by visitin’ some relatives of mine, you see. Ah waited until only Big Mac and Granny Smith were the only ones at the farm.”

“How long were you away from the farm?” I inquired.

“Not long. After a brief trip to Manehatten, Ah came home. My parents were furious at me for leavin’ behind their backs. Ah was so caught up in my own personal goals that Ah forgot the first thing that my folks taught me and my brother; family comes first.”

Sighing wearily, Applejack replied, “Do you know what Ah sometimes see Big Mac doin’ with my sister? He pulls out the album Ah brought here and tells her his memories of mom and dad. The good times that we all once had. Times that Applebloom will never fully experience for herself.”

She put the photo album away in her satchel. “Granny Smith ain’t gonna be around much longer. Applebloom’s still in school so she can’t work full time just yet. One moment of faulterin’ changed everything for them. For me.”

“I still don’t believe that your parent’s deaths were anything that could have been prevented,” I stated earnestly. “It’s good to have regrets about bad decisions, but not if the outcome wasn’t anything you could have remedied.”

“Maybe I need another talk with my dad about that,” she said with a resigned shrug. “But not today, All that yellin’ and cryin’ has worn me out. Maybe we can pick this up next week?”

“You can have as many visits as you deem necessary, Applejack.”

We shook hooves, a sight that would have delighted Thorax and repulsed my mother. She trotted out the door, tired but a little happier than when she came in.

When the door clicked shut, I put my left hoof onto my chest and took a deep breath. When I slowly exhaled, I swung my left foreleg out. I was told by a colleague that this helped calm him down after the more intense sessions.

This did indeed help clear the air. But my job is never without drama for long.



* * *



Big Mac smiled as he sat down in my office. “You know who Ah am, don’t you?”

“Well, I’ve been in Ponyville for a while now, so I think I’ve seen you selling apples with your sister Applejack once or twice,” I replied with a careful, guarded tone.

He studied me critically. “Ah don’t suppose you could tell me if Applejack’s been seein’ you, right?”

I blinked. “Sir, I can’t tell you anything about any of my clients in any way, shape . . .”

Holding up one of his huge hooves, he cut me off. “Save it. You just told me what Ah wanted to know. She’s been here.”

“What?” I jerked my head, astonished. “I didn’t say anything about your sister.”

“Didn’t need to. You hesitated before answerin’ me. One moment of hesitation can change everythin’, you know.”

Trying to regain my composure, I looked over his paperwork. “It says here you set up an appointment as a new client. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

Leaning confidently into his chair, he replied, “Nothin’ too serious. Ah know that since Ah’m a client, you can’t say squat to my sister or anypony else about anythin’ Ah tell you, right?”

“That’s right, sir.”

“Good. Well, Ah got a whole lot of confessin’ to do, so listen up. Ah bet AJ asked you to imitate mom or dad, right?” He quickly added, “Yeah, Ah know, you can’t say nothin’ either way. Ah think it’s cute that she’s tryin’ to escape her past by havin’ you imitate it. You can never escape guilt, though.”

I squirmed in my chair, flustered by this arrogant display. “Sir, I don’t . . .”

“Just keep it zipped for a spell, all right? Believe me, there’s a point to all this. She probably told you about how she waited till mom and dad left the farm before she skedaddled off to Manehattan without even asking’ me or Granny Smith if that was all right.” He scowled at the bitter memory. “Ah wanted to kick her flank sideways for doin’ somethin’ that selfish. When she slunk on home, Ah had hoped that mom and dad would punish her.”

Snorting, he said, “But they didn’t. Ah guess havin’ Applebloom made them soft. All they did was swear to stay close to her on the farm so she didn’t get itchy hooves again till she was grown up.” Looking up at the ceiling, he gave a resigned shrug. “They always did have a soft spot for their daughter.”

“I can see why you would be bitter about that,” I admitted weakly.

“Not as bitter as Ah would soon be, I’ll tell you that for free. About a year later, we were out in the orchard near the river. When a nearby beaver den busted open, a flash flood knocked our parents off of their hooves. It don’t take much water to carry somepony away, you know.” Big Mac had the same faraway look that Applejack had. “Ah was too far away from the flood to help them, but Applejack could have hauled them outta the water.”

His lower lip trembled a little. The acrid taste of sorrow drifted off of him. “But she didn’t! She just stood there, shiverin’ like a coward! When they got yanked out of sight, Ah ran over to AJ. Since Ah still couldn’t trust her to be honest with, Ah asked her if she even saw mom and dad. Even after the way she treated us, Ah gave her one last chance to be honest with me.”

“W-what did she say?” I asked, knowing full well what the answer was, hating myself for not legally being able to tell the truth.

“She said no!” He barked. “Why would anypony ever tell a lie like that to her own dang brother is beyond me! That’s twice she broke up the family! Ah was so dang mad at her that Ah wanted to toss her into the flood.”

He pawed at the carpet, scowling. “But that would have been too good for the likes of her. A wild filly like Applejack would have wiped out the rest of the family if it wasn’t for me.”

I started to taste a slight hint of catharsis. “I don’t quite understand, Big Mac.”

“Oh, you will,” He remarked wryly. “Over the years the farm’s been doin’ pretty good, all things considered. Ah was worried that AJ might leave the farm for good when she got roped into savin’ Equestria over an’ over. But bein’ a hero won’t bring back our parents. Ah make sure AJ never forgets her one moment of hesitation.”

He smirked at my confusion. “Whenever AJ gets just a bit too uppity around the farm, all Ah have to do is pull out the family album, put Applebloom in my lap and talk about how great her parents were. That pulls the starch out of AJ’s sails real quick.” Nodding with satisfaction, he continued, “Ah’ve been keepin’ her on that guilt trip for half her life. She chose to leave our parents behind, so Ah chose to keep her on a leash.”

The stream of catharsis was pouring out of him now. Even though it nourished me, I didn’t like the taste.

“She’s been workin’ the orchard so hard, she had to get carted to the hospital.” Snorting in contempt, he groused, “Personally, Ah think she’s fakin’ it, but Granny Smith and Applebloom are all freaked out about this. Maybe Ah’ll hire some help, but Ah ain’t never lettin’ Applejack forget her failure.”

Struggling to keep my commentary as legally abiding as possible, I asked, “Why are you telling me this? How am I supposed to help you get through this problem?”

“Oh, there ain’t no problem at all, mister,” he replied cheerfully. “Ah know from the grapevine that you feed off of catharsis. You are the only one in Equestria that knows my methods of controllin’ my sister. Since you can’t tell her what you now know without losin’ your business, Ah can finally get this big ol’ secret off my chest.” He chuckled. “Feels pretty good.”

Trying my best to not scream at my client, I said, in the most cautious voice I could muster, “Is that all you have to say?”

Trotting happily towards the door, he replied, “Eyup! See you around, mister.”

My mother would have been proud of Big Mac’s manipulations. I pray that no mare ever falls in love with him. She might not like what she’ll eventually discover.

I came to Ponyville to not only devour the catharsis my practice produces from my clients, but also to find out all the myriad ways ponies live their lives. The longer I stay here, the more I realize that life for ponies is a domination game. Pony nature is elitist, prone to subjugating others. Queen Chrysalis always thought in broad, plain terms when it came to conquest, but ponies find far more subtle ways to hold sway over their own kind.

Applejack never paid me another visit. Whenever I see her at her apple kiosk or pulling a cart, she always looks tired. Bags under her eyes. Drooping mane and tail. Big Mac is always somewhere nearby, looking far more robust.

I often feel just as exhausted, for the same reasons. Like Applejack, I feel like a coward for not being able to tell her what her brother is doing. I carry a lump of guilt in my chest that never lightens no matter how many other ponies I help.

When I betrayed my mother, I left behind the most cold-hearted creature I knew. Some ponies, in spite of their cheerful appearance, are far colder.

I had never known what loneliness was until I saw how other ponies are bound to their grief and misery for their entire lives.

Can I ever find the happiness I’ve been hoping to keep ever since I’ve moved here?

Sometimes, on the difficult, lonely days, the answer isn’t so clear.

There might never be an answer.

* * *

“Everyone sees what you appear to be. Few experience what you really are.”—Niccolo Machiavelli

Author's Note:

One of the inspirations for this story was a long standing observation of mine that one of the biggest sources of guilt trips is the television. Every day, you and I are dutifully reminded that we smell bad, that we're fat, that we aren't voting for the right guy. We don't eat the right food, wear the right clothes, watch the right movies, etcetera ad nauseam.
We are surrounded by guilt trips every day. How many of them control you? Are you even aware of being controlled?
Something to think about, folks. (But don't let me guilt trip you.:eeyup:)

Comments ( 47 )

Oh damn... that was dark. That was really dark.

8334659
Thanks! I was hoping to get this kind of reaction.

I was expecting incest or pedophilia or both this..........this is far worse.

8334735
I'm glad I haven't lost my ability to get under my reader's skins. :pinkiecrazy:

God above... Now I just want to find Applejack and hug her...:fluttercry: Nopony should have to live with that kind of guilt, nopony.

8334774
Yeah, I want to hug her, too. This is the first Applejack-centric story I've done. I'm happy with the results.

8334811
Well, you should be. For the first AJ centered story you've done, you did quite well I say.

Technically speaking, while he legally can't go telling other ponies about his clients, he does have the right to report crimes a client has committed. What Big Mac is doing to Applejack is emotional abuse, and could be legally considered a crime. I'm not sure what channels would be involved here, but legally he could go to the authorities without risking his medical licence

8334663
I hope there's more with Mr. Lonely Hearts. This was pretty good.

So, if I'm reading this right, you're saying that Big Mac is a cold-hearted sociopath who is spending every waking movement doing his best to control and manipulate Applejack's life so she lives every waking moment in guilt driven agony until she works herself into an early grave, fuelled by his utter hatred for his sister because she got special treatment and was too afraid to save her parents when she was a filly? Thus spitting on his parent's grave because he's disregarding their lesson of "Family Comes First"?

...Why does this not have a [Dark] and [Alt. U} Tag?

What a cold-hearted bastard Big Mac is in this one; poor AJ... :fluttercry:

8334990
Considering how often Big Mac is depicted as a big cuddly teddy bear, I couldn't help but think of a quote from an episode of "Batman The Animated Series", which goes "The brighter the picture, the darker the negative".

8334970
Your analysis is correct. (Thanks for the censor bars, by the way.) Technically, every fanfiction is Alternate Universe. I used the tag on my Equestria Wasteland story "The Unraveled World", but that's because it was a Equestria Wasteland story.
As for the darkness in the story? Well, people who are touchy about depressing material steer clear of Sad-tagged stories, anyway.
I've written much darker stuff than this.

8334961
If I can come up with anything else, I'll post it here first. I'm glad you liked it.

8334882
I'll have to remember this if I write another MLH story. (Maybe mention your points the next time a pony asks MLH questions about privacy laws? Hmm. Possibly.):ajsmug:

8334882
True, but then again, so is (forgive me if I'm wording this wrong, English isn't my first language) failure to render assistance with fatal consequences. As in, choosing not help someone when said person is in danger of dying without a chance of dying yourself (which, given she's an Earth Pony and the story says that she would've been powerful enough to do so, is simply the case).

Sure, she might get out because she was a filly (and is a mare, you know how it is with sentences and genders), but I see no reason why Big Mac being harsh to the person who decided NOT to save his parents life would qualify as some sort of high treason or whatever.

The law itself is also fairly new and might not be in effect in Equestria. Before a change in... I think it was 2015 (?) such abuse was only a criminal offense when it... well, was abuse. Nowadays, the rules are:

  • Isolating a person from their friends and family
  • Controlling what they do, where they go, who they can see, what they wear and when they sleep
  • Repeatedly putting them down, such as telling them they are worthless
  • Enforcing rules and activity which humiliate, degrade or dehumanise the victim
  • Financial abuse
  • Threats to reveal or publish private information

I wouldn't say he's putting her down, per se, as he's not even talking to her. I mean, all he's basically doing is having her remember that she choose to let their parents die... Which she did. I wouldn't say it's humilation. Not even sure if you can call that shaming either.

Also.. it would not be good for business if he relied on that. If it becomes public knowledge that he adds a little "except when I choose to" to his "I will never tell anyone what happened here", his business is done for, or at least hindered.

Further, it would put Applejack in a situation where she can't even sustain the farm her family made and successfully screwed another family member over, which oughta go down like oil with her conscience... IF the penalities are even that harsh and it's not just a waste of time.

Then it's also his word against Big Macs, so unless they waste a truth spell on that (which they might do, granted, because well, female and celebrity), they can just brand the changeling a liar. Would Applejack stand against her brother? Or would she tell that she mentioned it in their session, possibly leading the changeling to false conclusions?

Also, he'd be allowed to REPORT it... Not tell the entire town. Again, this is probably a fine at best. We are talking emotional abuse here. You know, the thing a person experiences when you tell them to f**k off. I doubt it'll be that harsh of a punishment to be worth all the trouble that comes for it.

Bonus points if Applebloom figures out that Applejack took not only her parents, but her brother too. That ought to be hilarious drama...


On second thought, scratch what I said. The changeling playing whistleblower should be entertaining :pinkiehappy:

8335362
Admittedly its not a perfect situation, and perhaps Mr Lonely Hearts wouldn't pursue that path. I was just letting it known he legally could go to authorities with Big Mac's confession. What would happen after that I don't know. Might be good, might be bad, might be the same. Either way though, in his shoes, would you feel better keeping it a secret or doing something to try to help, as limited as it might end up being?

8335385
Personally... Yes, I'd keep the secret.
The first reason is personal: I rarely break my word. That also means I rarely give it... but it is what it is. Just the type of person I am.

Secondly, I hate to say it, but... If my brother were to kill my parents, I'd be pissed at him too. I know she just choose not to help, but you know... Tomato Tomato. And even if the story doesn't really say anything about it, Big Mac says that he only pulls it out of Applejack is being an arrogant show off. This is something I'd strictly put on the line of "get over it". Heck, it's not like Applejack was willing to tell her remaining family what she did either.

Finally, I feel like the ways it could go wrong would outweight any benefit. Even if everything goes through legally (and so many things can go wrong, from no or next to no punishment to it going the entirely opposite direction and AJ being tried for malevolent indifference), the only thing that would've been achieved is getting Applebloom to loose another member of her family to AJ. And she'd know, because it would come out as soon as there's a trial, one way or the other. Would you want Applejack to live in a world where her silblings, her only remaining direct family, hate her for what she did? I sure wouldn't.

It's mostly the third one and the fine line between putting someone down and keeping someone grounded in reality that makes the "No tell" for me, at least if I were the changeling.

8335431
Your reasons a good and I respect your opinion. I disagree myself, but only because Applejack was just in the hospital for a heart problem, which is why she is seeking a counsellor in the first place. Big Mac going to Mr Lonely Heart was simply to give himself more praise or potentially worse, to stop Lonely Heart from being able to properly help Applejack.

While Big Mac has a right to be angry, he has reached the point where Applejack's health and potentially life has become endangered, and by his own words, doesn't really believe he has crossed a line, and believes she is faking it, and so will continue his abuse in the future.

While reporting him might ultimately cause more emotional problems (and even then, Apple Bloom might react negatively towards Big Mac, rather then towards Applejack once the truth is learned), if it means Applejack's physical health can be saved, I think it is still the more worthwhile option. Emotions can hurt, but overtime they can be healed. A life lost can't.

8335443
I see what you mean, but don't forget: She KILLED two ponies. His parents. One lost life can't be healed? Well, try two.

The thing is that he did try his best to give her another chance. This is more than a lot of people will give their parents' killer. And she chose to lie. The truth will come out after the trial, and I honestly see Applebloom choosing "she killed our parents, and I'll make sure she won't forget it" over "I chose to let our parents die, and when your brother was bothering me about it, I removed him from our life too". Honestly, I think that's flat out psychotic.

Applejacks physical health could easily be saved. Namely, she could come clean and finally get over it. While the story is incredibly one-sided and heavily biased towards her side, the fact remains that the only reason he can hurt her is that she doesn't forgive herself. What Big Mac is doing is reminding AJ that she killed them. He doesn't directly put her down for that (if he did, I'd be more inclined to take her side on this), he just reminds her that she's made mistakes and shouldn't act as if she didn't make any.

Besides, you aren't really saving a life, aren't you? You're likely sending someone to prison (if something that big happens or anything happens at all), ruining his life, effectively ending it (trust me, it's not sunshine and rainbows in prison or the life after). You're not saving anyone, you're just making it worse for all parties involved. Sure, maybe Applejack'll live (knowing she just curshed another family members' life), but Big Mac is down for the count.

Also... it depends on what'll happen afterwards. In the story, I mean. Big Mac is currently convinced that she's bluffing (heck, maybe she is, you have to consider that too), but will that last? Further, what GOOD did it do? Would Applejack have abandoned her family later on? What do we know about who Applejack was back when her parents were alive anyway? Especially in an A.U.? And if what Big Mac is implying is true (the Orchard does so good because AJ is working hard)... wouldn't that mean her life would be an exchange for Big Mac's and Applebloom's? And despite him thinking she's faking it... he's considering to hire help. He has no intention of letting her die, for better or worse. So we'd be justifying ruining a life by banking on Big Mac letting her work herself to death, which would go against anything he'd want, because he thinks she's faking. If the author would've put in AJ actually dying... maybe, but like this...

Don't misunderstand, I can see what you mean, but the bottom line for me is: If you don't wanna regret something for life, don't do something you'll regret for life.

At any point in time, AJ could just get out the door and leave. Big Mac isn't threatening her, after all. As far as abusive relationships go, this is so mild that I honestly consider it a nonissue. She could just fess up what she did. After that, he can't control her anymore. She doesn't though. And that's her being a coward and it's her fault. And as someone who's BEEN in an abusive relationship (a modern one, I mean. No physical violence, just a constant reminder of worthlessness... which is again more than AJ has to endure), I can say that the only way to get out of it is to snap out of it. It's her choice, just like it was her choice when she let her parents die, and she'll have to live with it.

8335514
That's fair enough. You're right that story does push for us to emphasise with AJ and not Big Mac, and your other views I do understand.

I think this is an issue we aren't likely to agree on though. I'm glad we had this discussion, as it has made me look over the situation, but I still feel more inclined towards AJ then Big Mac. Again, I respect your opinion and absolutely see your reasoning, I just personally see Big Mac's approach to this situation, as wrong, whether or not it could be justified by AJ's inaction.

8335527
That sounds like a fair idea to me. Thanks for the discussion 😊

8335362
You've made some interesting points. The way it stands now, MLH is stuck for options. I'm flattered that you've put in this much effort to explain your thoughts about my story. I live to see this kind of reaction.:pinkiehappy:

I honestly liked this one more than the first. The conflict on this fic was pretty interesting, I really felt bad for poor AJ. Also Big Mac could bee an great villain.

U get a like, man!

8339376
Cool! I'm glad that folks like you like my story that much! Thanks for the fave.

And know i want to break big macs legs off bustard going way to far applejack and a fucking heart attack thanks to what he has been doing

amazing story, who knew that big Mac could be evil? I never really liked him anyway.

8335514

and when your brother was bothering me about it, I removed him from our life too

You're likely sending someone to prison (if something that big happens or anything happens at all), ruining his life, effectively ending it (trust me, it's not sunshine and rainbows in prison or the life after). 

Ahem

Again, this is probably a fine at best. We are talking emotional abuse here. You know, the thing a person experiences when you tell them to f**k off. I doubt it'll be that harsh of a punishment to be worth all the trouble that comes for it.

Not even a fine. This is below the authorities; a family issue.

8358836
I don't know the Equestrian legal system, so I wanted to point out that it's a lose-lose thing either way.

8358968
I doubt the Equestian legal system is going to send someone in prison to rot if they're not a threat to Equestria. What we've seen of it has been extremely forgiving. But fair enough.

It seems to me the solution here is the same as the one to the episode Green Isn't Your Color. Without getting into specifics. Lonely Hearts should strongly encourage Applejack to tell the truth. There's several reasons she should; it'll let her know what her family knows so she can evaluate their (namely Big Mac's) behavior in that context, it'll let her family know how she feels about the situation and that she does feel guilt, and it'll allow Big Mac to discuss his own feelings on the matter. Lonely Hearts can say that the imperative to come clean is based on his own expertise, and if he wants to get a little into the gray area, say he's privy to information that makes confessing imperative but can't say what that information was, or tell Applejack she actually has no idea whether anyone saw her that fateful day.

8335514
8335385

It seems to me your disagreement comes from the fact that there's a discrepancy in what Big Mac said he did, and the effect that's happening on Applejack.

Other than harboring negative feelings toward AJ and thinking she's faking being sick, all he's said he actually does explicitly is pull out the family photo album when AJ gets "uppity". He said he's been doing that for half her life, and that's made out to be like it's a constant leash of manipulation.

The troubles of Applejack is that she's constantly over-working herself 'til she has a heart condition and needs to go to the hospital and the depiction at the end of the story is of an AJ with bags under her eyes with a confident spectre of Big Macintosh always looming over her shoulder like a grand puppet master.

The two sides of the story don't quite fit. Is Big Mac telling us everything? If not, what's he doing to constantly control Applejack? Is the main culprit of Applejack's abuse Applejack herself, with Big Mac being a mere thorn not even privy to the full extent of her guilt, hence his thinking she's faking being sick?

We don't know.

Hence why AJ ought to make she she knows what her family does and does not know (by confessing), and make sure they know what she feels, so Big Mac's actions can be both more deliberated and more clearly deliberate.

You've inspired intimate conversation and discussion about this story and many things that happen in it. In my opinion this is on every of the better stories this site has to offer and you did a fantastic job throughout. As an aspiring psychologist, I deeply enjoy anything to do with a character centered around counseling and the idea of a changeling filling such a roll. The two stories show how this character and his role in the universe could be episodic, greeting client said every story while tying it together with the issue pertaining to Applejack. I never expected such in-depth and unique interpretations of the problems they would be going through and I loved every second of reading this. Thank you.

8391157
You are very welcome! :ajsmug: Thank you for the comments and for the fave!

Hmm... I think I might know a way Lonely Heart can alert Applejack without pointing to himself directly... :trixieshiftright:

8430295
I'm sure you do.:ajsmug: I'm glad you like my story.

8431099
I certainly do! I love both of them. :twilightsmile:

This was an interesting tale that earned a fav and thumbs-up for the subjects it touched, and the commentary it raised from other users.

I personally would love to read more of Lonely Heart's experiences with the ponies around him, though like a user said, convincing Applejack to come out clean to her family would be the best solution.

Despite Big Mac's opinion of her being able to save their parents from the flash-flood, I still believe that it would have resulted in her death due to her size back then. The three of them would have been dragged to drown. Thus, this family issue is far more thorny than what most professionals would like - which renders the situation very hard to handle professionally.

So, two individuals who are screwed for different reasons, with one blaming herself for her cowardice to this day, and the other who blames her for her cowardice and lying to this day.

The only solution would be questioning themselves: can a foal be capable of rescuing two fully grown ponies from a flash-flood?

Why didn't Big Mac get down to it, then?

Too many questions left with no answers. *wink-wink*

Holy shit, i did not expect to gain a burning hatred for big mac out of all of this. This is really dirty, and i wonder if real therapists have to live with this kind of crap.

on an "totally overthinking it"note. I wonder if he'd ever realize just how much he's setting his family up for failure by emotionally compromising the only other dedicated farmhand by the time they both get granny's age

Oh and throw in some "something something hypocrisy"

8569032
Therapists probably do have to endure the pettiness that this story's villain revels in. As for what the long term consequences that you mentioned? You make a good point. Thanks for the comments. :ajsmug:

9040724
I'm glad you liked it. Sequels tend to get fewer views, but I couldn't not write this one.

Sweet Baby Moses are you sure Big Mac isn't suppose to be a freaking villian WTF!
I never thought I would be mad at someone but I want punch him in the face. Making AJ feel guitly, then making much worse. I hope AJ doesn't work herself to death, and you get the same thing

I feel like he was way OOC

9252964
This was the only time that the villain didn't get punished in one of my stories, so there's that. I had to write a story where the villain got away with his deeds otherwise the story simply falls apart. At least for me. I'm glad that you feel this strongly about my story; it means that I did my job right. The stories that don't inspire some kind of reaction from the reader are the stories that fail. (I've had a few that have done that.:ajsleepy:)

By the way, thanks for the fave on "Mister Lonely Heart.":twilightsmile:

I hope that you continue this series. Its interesting

10505067
I'm afraid I don't have any more ideas for Mister Lonely Heart. I'm glad that you like my stuff.
Right now I'm in cartoonist-mode, cranking out dark humor toons in my blog.

10505093
If you have any more ideas in the future, I’d like to see this series continue

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