Roll for Initiative

by David Silver

18 - Welcome to My Parlor

The unseen force thrust Spike onto a comfortable couch with brown cushions and purple trim. It was a perfectly nice couch, more the shame that it was also upside-down. Spike dug his claws into the fabric quickly, expecting to fall from the ceiling he had been placed, but it seemed the couch had its own gravity that held him to it.

"You look tense." Discord was there, stepping out of his kitchen and walking across the room, just barely dodging a spurt of lava from a small volcano. "I really should replace that, it's getting past its fun." He vanished and reappeared beside his detached arm, taking it back simply by virtue of assuming the correct position. "Now, I hear you've been searching for me. What's on your little mind?"

Spike tilted his head at Discord, who was upright while Spike was still facing the floor with his head. "Um, I don't suppose I could get to the floor without falling? I mean, no offense or anything, but this is a little..."

Discord rolled his eyes dramatically, spinning in full three sixties away from one another. "If you insist. Fluttershy approved of this one." He seized Spike at either of his sides and put him down on the more musical sofa that let out a piano note when his scaly bottom rested on it. "There you are, head up, just the way you like it."

Spike shuffled, finding any time he touched another cloth key on the piano, it let out a sound, and not always that of a piano. "That's kinda interesting... Oh, right, that's not what I'm here for. It's about the game."

"Mmm?" He leaned in. "The girls are ready to start whenever you are."

"Right, but we usually only play when they're not here."

"And?" Discord looked baffled at the problem.

"And... they can't be in two places at one time?"

Discord huffed. "That sounds more like a personal problem. They really should fix that."

Spike crossed his arms. "Yeah, but, you know, mares, right?"

"Tell me about it." Discord extended a claw towards Spike. "So what's the plan?"

"I got everypony to agree, twice a moon." He held up a finger. "At the start--" He extended a second. "And right in the middle. At sundown, as normal. Work for you?"

"Sounds dreadfully predictable." He had a sly look on his face. "Don't blame me if I spring a little... something on you all off the clock. Adventure doesn't wait until you're ready, after all."

Spike cocked a dubious brow, though was distracted as a singing tea bag drifted past. "Uh, how do you get anything done in here?"

Discord snatched the lively tea and stuffed it in a box that wasn't there a moment ago. "I thought I had put those away ages ago. Well, now that the 'business' is handled, welcome to my humble abode." He gestured grandly across the chaotic mess that was his house. "To think, you got to see it before Twilight."

Spike cracked a little smile at that. Beating Twilight to something was a little victory. "I wasn't racing her," he demurred. "Nice place though..." His eyes wandered to the stairs that lead nowhere at all and what seemed to be a jacket stand covered in popcorn. "Very... interesting."

"I try." He bowed a little before turning to regard his abode. "I think it's past time for a remodel. Can't have myself getting into any ruts, now can we?" He snapped a finger sharply, and the house became a castle, with long tables, hanging tapestries, and flickering candles. "There we are, now isn't this more suiting the occasion?"

Spike hopped up from the couch that had turned into a wooden bench. "Huh, this is actually pretty nice." He looked to the tapestries and saw that all showed different parts of Discord's life, from his time of tormenting Equestria to the current day. There was even one showing him speaking to Spike on the bench he just stood up from. "Freaky. Does it come with servants too?"

"Of course!" He clapped his hands in a light golf clap.

Immediately, a second Discord in maid's attire stepped out from around a corner. "You rang, sir?"

Spike blinked softly at the cross-dressed god. "Oh, uh..." He considered a moment. "I don't suppose you have a ruby flaked ice cream sundae?"

"I'll be right back with that." And off the maid capered.

Discord, the original, grinned at Spike. "All the amenities of an old-timey castle."

Spike rubbed his chin. "I'm not complaining, but did they have ice cream on demand back in the old days?"

Discord shrugged. "Why wouldn't they? If there isn't anything else, I'll send you back now."

"Sure thing." Spike gave an emphatic thumbs up. "It'll be in just a few days. Looking forward to it."

Discord thwipped Spike across his snout and he staggered back, bumping against the door to Twilight's castle.

He blinked, looking around to see that he had returned to Equestria. "Aw man," he kicked a small rock out of the way. "I didn't get that sundae." He oofed as a bright red bowl was shoved against his midsection. The ruby-encrusted dessert had arrived. "Well, nevermind..." He dipped a claw in and scooped out some of the cool treat before sampling it. "Mmm, Discord's not a bad chef."

Happy, he headed inside to fetch a proper spoon and enjoy himself.

---

Twilight made careful notes with a quill she couldn't see. Her eye was pressed to the viewpoint of a telescope. "Fascinating," she spoke to none but herself as she peered intently. "This star has been moving erratically for the last--"

"Twilight," came a new voice. Applejack approached the stargazing princess. "Ah need to talk to ya."

Twilight pulled away and sat up with surprised blinks. "Hello, Applejack. Is something wrong?"

Applejack nodded firmly as she sat on her haunches beside the cushion that Twilight had parked herself on. "It's about Spike an' Big Mac."

Twilight smiled gently. "They've been getting along quite well. It's nice for the both of them to have a--"

"--It ain't nice!" Applejack clopped a hoof on the ground. "He's filling mah brother with strange thoughts, and ah don't like it not one bit."

Twilight stood up and stepped off her cushion. "Strange thoughts? That's not the Spike I know. What are they doing that's so odd?"

Applejack frowned, stalking after Twilight. "'Course you don't find it funny at all, yer a unicorn."

Twilight went still a moment before turning to Applejack. "Because we are friends, I will give you a chance to explain what you mean by that."

Applejack put up her hooves quickly. "I'm not tryin' to talk ill of ya, Twi. Yer a friend, like ya said, but ya didn't even notice."

"Notice what, exactly?" She cocked a brow at her irate friend. "That Spike has a friend he trusts and can be himself with?"

"That's all well and good, but no." Applejack circled to be in front of Twilight. "When we came home, Big Mac wasn't himself. He had a big ole unicorn horn." She raised a hoof and tapped herself where a horn would be. "Right there, and he was usin' it too!"

Twilight shook her head. "So he was playing pretend. What's the harm in that?"

"And ya don't think a pony just 'pretendin'' ta be another kinda pony is a bit... odd?"

Twilight rolled a hoof at that. "I personally helped Rarity, a unicorn, get wings, like a pegasus. You've been a breezy. No, I don't think a little experimenting is going to hurt a pony. Is he acting oddly?"

"Yes!" Applejack huffed with growing indignance. "He doesn't show respect at all."

"Respect?" Twilight's brows went up together. "He's your brother, your older brother, may I point out? What respect isn't he showing?"

Applejack shrank back. "Well, yeah, maybe... But ah'm the one that--"

Twilight leveled a hoof at Applejack. "--Cut that thought right there. Do you think he doesn't know you've saved Equestria a dozen times?"

"So why isn't he listening to me!" Applejack fumed with a growl. "If he knows that, he should be payin' attention!"

"He loves you, Applejack." Twilight put a hoof gently on Applejack's shoulder. "He thinks the world of you."

"Then we shouldn't be fuedin'!"

"No, you shouldn't." Twilight drew her hoof back. "I don't think he wants to. You know, when I was in Princess Celestia's school, I had a few passing thoughts of my own." She chuckled softly at the thought. "I had Spike right there... Since I was forced to be his mother, well... I wondered..."

"Ya didn't..."

"I did." Twilight spread her wings wide. "I tried being a dragon. Not my preferred way of being, but I wasn't hurt by thinking about it, or even trying it. I'm still a unicorn, all these years later, aren't I?"

Applejack struggled to think of a more stereotypically unicorn than Twilight, but that nopony was quite the fit. "Ya never told yer parents, did ya?"

Twilight colored a little, her cheeks warming. "No... but I don't tell them a lot of things. They would have laughed at me, not yelled at me, not that I wanted either, so, no, I didn't tell them about my foalish experiments."

Applejack sank to her haunches. "What if he really does like unicorns more than earth ponies?"

Twilight shrugged. "They're both ponies. Is that so bad?" She cracked a sudden smirk. "Could be worse. He could decide he likes griffons."

Applejack paled at the thought. "Don't even joke!"

Twilight giggled, undisturbed by the humor. "My opinion is unchanged. If he isn't hurting anypony, and he's having fun, there's no reason to get in the way."

Applejack took a slow breath, then nodded slowly. "Alright, ah think I know what has to be done."

Twilight smiled radiantly. "You'll let him play?"

"Ah'll join him." Applejack nodded firmly. "Ah'll see exactly what he's up to for mahself. Maybe yer right, and it's nothin' and ah'm just bendin' myself in knots for nothin'. 'Sides, we're siblings, we should play a little, right?"

Twilight raised a hoof to her chin. "I'm not... entirely sure that's the best course of action."

"I'll ask him tonight." She spun away from Twilight. "We'll get this settled."

Twilight watched Applejack descend the stairs before shaking her head. "I'm going to warn Spike." Her astronomy entirely forgotten for the moment, she winked out of existence and appeared in front of Spike's door. She knocked gently. "Spike?"

The door opened quickly. "Hey, Twi," replied a sleepy-looking Spike. "What's up?"

Twilight smiled at Spike. "Sorry, I didn't wake you up, did I? I wanted to talk about your game."

Spike perked right up. "What about it?"

"You're not in trouble," she assured quickly. "It's about Applejack and Big Mac."

"Huh?" He tilted his head a little. "What about them?"

"Applejack is upset that Big Mac is pretending to be a unicorn. She's decided to join the game to see what it's all about. I thought you should have some pre-warning before she shows up. She's likely to be very guarded and suspicious."

Spike swallowed audibly as he worried his fingers together. "What should I do? Applejack can be a little... forceful."

Twilight shook her head. "Well, to start, this is your game, and this is your home. If she starts making things unenjoyable for the rest of the ponies there, you have every right to ask her to behave, or to leave. I will back you up on this."

Spike's expression brightened to a smile at the promise of support from Twilight. He hugged her suddenly, squeezing her dearly. "Thanks! I mean, she's, and I..."

Twilight wrapped a leg around Spike. "You've been my assistant countless times. I can return the favor here. This game is obviously very important to you. I think it's important to Big Mac too, and I don't want it being ruined. How did you get Discord involved, by the way? I never heard that part of the story."

Spike nervously laughed. "You can blame Fluttershy for that part, but it's alright. He's a good part of the game now, and he has as much fun as the rest of us." He stepped back and noddd. "Thanks, again. I hope I won't need your help, but knowing I have it is a big help."

"Anytime. Goodnight, Spike."

Author's Note:

Will Applejack get things sorted out, or will things get more prickly?

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Comments

[SideWinder]

If you want to play you have to be a guy or wear an awesome moustache
Just like his emoticon
...

[FanOfMostEverything]

I do love the exchange between Spike and Discord, especially mares and their inconsiderate inability to bilocate. It felt wonderfully organic.

As for the game... This could be complicated. At least Twilight's gotten Applejack down a step or two, but she could still prove highly disruptive, and that's putting aside the Bearer of Honesty trying to pretend she's something she isn't. I almost hope Discord forces her into a different gender, tribe, or even species, but I don't want the group alienating someone who might genuinely enjoy the game.

Of course, if she's a bad sport from the word go, then bring on the girdles of masculinity and femininity.

[Booster Spice]

Discord could be particularly vindictive, and let Applejack play as herself. Super Powered Earth Pony of Absolute honesty with all that implies.

Spikes short. Anyone up for a bit of Wizzard tossing?

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Glad to see Twilight sticking up for Spike and Big Macintosh. Maybe once Applejack ends up in a situation in the game where Big Mac's unicorn powers come in handy, she'll change her tune.

[OmniFox]

Kind of ironic the fact that Big Mac pretend to be a unicorn since he's falling in love with one.

[zaku666]

for some reason ive left your story as tracked.
get faved son

[David Silver]

8525451
Thanks kindly!

[howard035]

Oh dear. How will Applejack react to the plotline of Big Macs character's parents being murdered?

[redmar]

Twilight did the right thing in warning Spike about Applejack. If AJ becomes too prickly Discord can turn her into a cactus. Rainbow Dash would probably enjoy Applejack's presence at the game and might cause some surprises as a result.