Episode 11: Meet The Griffon
Sunbro4life's Comment
MagicLover2128's Comment
You shake your head and clear any water away while looking up and giving the laughing pair of ponies the Stink Eye.
“Ha Ha Ha! We got you good you weird monkey thing!” Dash laughs with tears in her eyes.
“Yeah Skelly,” Pinkie giggles, “But look on the bright side, you got a bath and your laundry done, tee hee hee!!!” You then begin to feel a chill coming on as the water seeps in and makes your body become freezing as heck. You wrap your arms around you and your teeth start to chatter with the cold.
Dang stupid sporadic pony weather! I’m gonna…NO! you will yourself to stop your teeth from chattering, and make your wrapped arms look like a crossed arms pose. I won’t give them the satisfaction of pranking me. You then force yourself to have a blank face as you give the two pranksters a bored look. The best way to ruin a prankster’s fun is to not give them a reaction after all. It seems to work in Dash’s case as her laughing winds down.
“What? Not even a claw shake at us?” she asks you, to which you only raise an eyebrow. She just stares at you for a good few seconds before she huffs in annoyance.
“Come on Pinkie, there’s plenty more on the list for today.” She then launches herself into the air.
“Wait up Dashie! Bye Skeletor!” Pinkie then waves and follows after her friend. As the two ponies leave, you get a wonderful idea. An awful idea. You get a wonderfully, awful idea.
“What is up with that creepy smile?” you hear Foxtrot ask her partner. You don’t correct her because you are in fact sporting the Grinch’s plotting smile.
It'll take awhile to get the supplies I need, but that doesn't matter. Pinks and Skittles just ticked off the wrong human. I have so so so many delightfully torturous ideas to get back at you two. Watch your backs, because the Prankster of Revenge has gotten a new target!
Ah yes, the Prankster of Revenge. You earned that title for always pranking the bullies at school, and you always made sure to make them as over-the-top as possible. Of course your style of pranking has gotten you into trouble a good decent chunk of times, (not to mention a few trips to the Police Station and ER) but that satisfying feeling of revenge always made up for it. You begin to fondly remember the last prank you pulled before being brought to this world.
I wonder if his hair ever grew back? After pondering for a few seconds, you just chuckle and decide that you don’t want to know. Sometimes expectations are greater than reality. Speaking of reality, you are brought back to it as a gust of wind flaps at your damp poncho and you involuntarily shake.
Alright, screw this. Twilight can go get pranked on her own time, I’m getting new clothes right freaking now. You then turn back to your two escorts and gesture for them to hurry up as you then make a sort of quick march towards where you hope Carousal Boutique is.
Okay, when I get there I gotta just hope she likes charity because I don’t have a cent to my name. I could make some drawings of me doing manual labor or some chores for her in exchange. I’d do just about anything for a new set of duds. Your feet begin to get uncomfortable in the soggy hobo shoes you still wear as you half heartedly give each of your legs a shake to clear any water that may still be sticking to you.
Heck, I would even settle for a towel or something right about now, you growl as the annoyance of Pinkie's and Rainbow's prank really starts to set in.
Greatness942's
Stupid prankster ponies and their stupid water buckets. And on the same day I had a good dream! GRA-
“There he is Bon Bon!” Your mental scream is interrupted by, of all things, Lyra and Bon-Bon. Turning to your left you see the unicorn and earth pony sitting on their usual park bench. Bon-Bon is about as perplexed as a drunk weasel that just watched a twenty-four hour compilation of ECW matches and episodes of Teletubbies, while Lyra is more overjoyed than Jeffrey Dahmer on bargain day in a knife shop.
"Wow! See, Bonnie, I told you! And on the same day a real life Griffon gets invited! Rainbow Dash has been bragging about her friend and-I'm getting ahead of myself. Hi again, Skelly!" she says, clearly remembering Pinkie saying your preferred name.
Once I’m able to communicate better, I’m adding Lord to the beginning of my name. Pinkie and Lyra are Okay, but more ponies should know to give respect to Lord Skele-
"L-Lyra!" Sweetie Drops/Bon-Bon gasps, a hoof over her mouth, "I-I'm shocked. You really weren't crazy when you talked about those bipeds, huh?"
"Nope! I've told you so!" Lyra brags, "I wouldn't have found out about them, though, if my granddad didn't tell me about the time he met one!"
...Wait, what? At your confusion, she continues.
"Oh right, I didn’t mention that to you?” she asks and you shake your head no. “Oh, sorry. I just so caught up letting my Canterlot friends know about you. Minuette, Lemon Hearts and the rest are very eager to meet you. But yeah, my Granddad always told me that when he was little he-*SPLAT*” she is interrupted as a tomato hits her in the face, making the whole thing red.
"Haha, nice one, Pinkie!" Dash says, before flying off in search of more ponies, Pinkie bouncing in tow.
Stupid interrupting tomatoes! Always at the most inconvenient times! Yeah, this isn’t the first time you’ve been in this exact situation.
"...Um, Lyra? You okay?" Bon-Bon asks her friend, who is no longer speaking. After a few eye blinks, Lyra wipes the sauce from her face and declares in determination.
“Oh, It Is ON!” she then trots off after Pinkie and Rainbow Dash leaving you and Bon Bon in the dirt.
“Wait Lyra! Um…Nice to meet you. Bye,” the earth pony declares before chasing after the upset unicorn. You slump your shoulders and sigh.
And the plot thickens. At this point it’s turning into a conspiracy. But I’ve already got so many quest lines… Alright, think of it this way, brain: Main Quest: Become a weird hybrid of Skeletor and Joseph Joestar and finally defeat any universe hopping He-Men I meet. Side Quest 1: Find Megan. Side Quest 2: Investigate Lyra's claim. There! Hey, maybe I should keep a record of this...
And thus, you pull out your sketch pad and write your objectives down (in English. It's not like anyone else will read them, after all). You also give your notebook a once over to check for any water damage. Thankfully it seems your notebook was spared from Pinkie's and Rainbow's prank.
Oh thank God! If I lost this thing then no one would be able to understand me. Worse I wouldn't be able to convey my 'psychic' visions. Though how did you stay dry while the rest of me got wet? You double check your notebook, and yet still no signs of damage. This causes you to 'hum' in thought.
Interesting...maybe this is cartoon logic at work? Maybe Celestia put some sort of spell on it? Oh...why can't I ever just understand something immediately when I notice it?! Is it too much to ask for a straight up answer universe!? You shake your fist in anger towards the sky at the universe for making your life difficult, but this display is interrupted by a cough.
"Knock it off, you’re scaring the populace." You shoot a quick glare at Foxtrot before looking around. It is as she says, the ponies around you are either looking at you weirdly or in straight up eyes widened fright. This causes you to awkwardly lower your fist.
Stupid ponies and their need to jump to conclusions and having to be scared of creatures they don't know! I'm not that scary dang it! With a shake of your head you put your focus back on finding Rarity's shope. You can worry about the skittish ponies later. I wonder if I'll ever be on their good side...?
With that thought you continue your search with your escorts in tow.
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
After a few more minutes of looking around you finally found Rarity's place. In that time you've seen the prankster duo prank almost everybody in town. Half the town looks like a paint nuke went off, and the other half is covered in all assortment of props.
You honestly think that their spree has gone a little too far, and you can't tell if this was supposed to happen or if you did something to make the results of their pranking this crazy.
Ugh stupid show only showing them pranking the other main characters! I really hope this was supposed to happen...and that they don't get sued for property damage. Well Pinkie at least, Rainbow on the other hand... Shaking your head you turn towards your two escorts and point at Carousal Boutique. Foxtrot gets your attention and turns to her partner.
"Alright. O'Carroll you watch the front, I'll keep an eye on it inside." Your eye twitches at that as you think,
I'm not an it! I'm a he! He God dang it! Get it right you stupid prissy guard or I will devour your soul!
Foxtrot seems to notice your frustration and simply smirks, which only aggravates you more. But you quickly take a few deep breaths before you do anything drastic. With that, you and Foxtrot head over to Rarity's door and you...
Kazuma Michishige's Comment
Start to knock when you remember that this place is a business and you don't need to knock. You open the door and the both of you walk inside.
"I'll be there in a minute!" You hear Rarity call out from somewhere further in.
Huh, she must have some sort of spell to let her know when a customer arrives.
*Cling Cling* You look up to the bell chime hanging from the door.
Or it’s something much more mundane. You find a tiny chair and carefully sit down, hoping that this one doesn't fall victim to your size. (So far, you’ve broken at least a dozen)
Freaking ponies and their chairs, you'd think that they would make seats for other species but noooo. Foxtrot, meanwhile, just smiles smugly before sitting at the chair opposite of you. You give her a quick bird (which she still doesn’t understand) before you proceed to ignore her till Rarity shows up.
Just as Rarity promised, she shows up in about a minute. "How can I help- oh it's you." She doesn't seem very happy to see you.
Well screw you too. You attempt to be nice and smile and wave, but all she does is glare at your damp poncho as if it were a living creature just waiting to strike. You then snap your fingers a few times, bringing her attention back to you.
“Hmm? Oh yes. Well what is it you want? I don’t recall today being the day I am forced to babysit you.” You roll your eyes before drawing your request for her to make some clothing for you.
"You want me to make clothes for you?" She asks. You nod and point at your drawing of pants, shirts, and even the almighty Skeletor outfit. Her eyes follow all of these before she finally looks up back to you. "Do you have bits to pay me?" You slowly shake your head. "I'm sorry, but no."
What? You scream mentally, I thought you're supposed to be the Element of Generosity! You're supposed to be 'of course I'll make you clothes!' then it gets awkward when you measure me and you give me clothes for free and stuff! It happens in every fanfic ever! You proceed to draw out your complaints and frustration. Rarity, understandably, doesn’t get your drawings. It’s only when you draw her Element Necklace and point at it over and over again that it clicks.
"Generous I may be, but I'm not a charity case darling. I run a business and I don't have the time to waste money trying to make clothes work for an entirely new species that I can't even use for other projects. Maybe we can work something out when you have a way to compensate me for it. Until that time though, please leave, I have several orders to fill." With that said she turns around to leave, and when she does you swear you hear Foxtrot hiding her laughter behind you.
Not good! If I don't get those clothes then who knows how long it'll be before I can actually make some cash! Come on brain think! Think! Thin-
And like that you had an idea. You quickly...
To make a good second impression with Rarity, see if you can intercept those flowers laced with sneezing powder. The hard part, of course, is to intervene after she has seen the flowers but before she falls prey to them.
Start to convulse and make sure to cause as much noise as possible as you do. Rarity looks behind to inspect the noise, and her eyes widen at your little display.
"What the-What is going on?! Are you having some sort of seizure!? Oh I knew I should have taken that med course back in high school!" Before Rarity can freak out too much, Foxtrot comes to her rescue.
"Relax ma'am, it's just having a....*sigh* vision. This is perfectly normal for the creature." Rarity blinks a few times in confusion before she asks,
"A...vision?" Foxtrot nods and continues.
"Yes. Apparently the creature has some sort of psychic abilities. It can predict the future, but it happens at random. Usually when it’s most convenient for the creature." Foxtrot scoffs. "Honestly I think it’s a bunch of bullspit. The creature is probably just faking to get out of trouble, but not everypony seems to share my views on it. Even my own partner believes it."
You know for a guard you sure do talk a lot. Also HA, you are so totally the Lassiter of this universe...wait does that mean the other guard is Juliet since he believes me? Won't that mean-you know what focus on the task at hand. Rarity raises an eyebrow at this before looking at your still convulsing form.
"Oh really...I wonder what he is 'seeing' now?" You take that as your que to get things started. So you quickly take out your notepad and draw a picture.
You draw Rarity's cutie mark accepting some flowers, then have an arrow point to her sniffing them. Then another arrow pointing her to sneezing like a mad mare with tiny dots around her nose and the flowers, and a final arrow pointing to Rainbow and Pinkie's cutie marks laughing. You end your convulsions as Rarity begins to investigate your prediction. She makes a 'hmmmm' sound in thought before she looks at you and asks,
"So you had a vision of Rainbow Dash and Pinkie making me sneeze with flowers?" You nod your head at this, to which she sighs.
"Well dear thank you for the warning, though I highly doubt this 'vision' of yours will come true, I’m not allergic at all. Anyway, as I said, I’m busy so ta ta for now." With that said you find yourself lifted up via magic and thrown out of the building. You lay on the ground for a good couple of seconds before your anger gets the better of you.
That bitch! You flip the double bird in her direction, How dare you have logic and self interest! Even after I helped you avoid a sneezing doom! Damn you Tabitha! Damn you and your amazing voice to hell!!! You slam the ground with a low growl that sends nearby ponies into a panic. Your overdramatic display is quickly stopped by the laughter of one Foxtrot.
"Oh sweet Celestia, you have got to be the most unlucky creature in the universe! This job is going to be so much more fun than I thought!" she chuckles and leans onto O’Carrol for support. You just give her a glare, show the two guards a picture of Sugarcube Corner, and leave in a huff.
That’s it you whorse, you’re now on the list.
You then flip to your notebook page which is titled “List of He-Mans” On it are a list of characters from the show that you feel must be punished. You put her name under the others.
You’re just a jerk missy, like Angel Bunny, but I will get you back. Though you’re low key compared to the others. You glare at the other names.
Spoiled Rich, Zesty Gourmand, Suri Polomare, Chimera that tried to eat Applebloom, Green Dragon that tried to kill Spike and Twilight, Unnamed Griffon who left Rainbow to die in that canyon, and of course…
Svengallop! I swear by the Power of Greyskull, you will pay. Heck, I might just make an exception and eat you. I do need the protein to bulk up after all… You then shake your head from these thoughts and place the notebook away.
Okay, I’ve got to calm down before I do something drastic. Today was just a bad day to get out of bed. Better just go back and sleep my life away before anything else can go wrong.
And sleep in you did.
...
...
...
What? That's it, get on with the time skip already.
THE NEXT DAY
This morning has been far better than yesterday, at least in your opinion. Your poncho has dried off, and you found some old cooking magazines to turn into new shoes. And Pinkie is currently in the bathroom laughing her butt off while being covered in ketchup, so you'd have to say that today's been good so far.
...
...
...
Right, should probably explain that. See you decided to get you revenge against Pinkie and Rainbow early this morning. You...
But to get them back your gona need time and supplies to prank them back and you get a few good ideas how but the one that your mind comes to first is putting ketchup packets under a toilet seat
Put about a dozen of ketchup packets under the toilet seat in Pinkie's bathroom, but you didn't stop there. You spent a good couple of hours setting up ketchup bombs all around the bathroom. Where and how you got the supplies for said bombs is a mystery that no one needs to know about…Okay, you took them from Pinkie’s closet. There, not so mysterious and exciting now is it?
Anyway, when Pinkie sat down not only did she pop the ketchup under the seat, but also set off the ketchup bombs around her. Needless to say her bathroom now has a nice shade of red. You’re actually kinda proud that you were able to pull it off considering Pinkie's...Pinkieness, but the fact that it covered the whole room thanks to cartoon logic was an added bonus. This leads us to now, with you standing in Pinkie's room laughing airily as Pinkie comes out of the bathroom a nice shade of red.
"Wowy! That was a super neat prank Skelly! I don't think I've ever been covered head to hoof in ketchup before!" she declares with a huge grin on her face.
With that said she proceeded to lick all the ketchup off of her ala Scooby Doo. If it weren't Pinkie that did it you would have questioned the physics behind it. Instead you just nodded your head at the physics breaking pony.
"Oh! Are you gonna prank Rainbow next? Are ya!? Are ya!? Are ya!?"
Oh you have no idea you adorable pink pony you, you smirk and pat her poofy head. With that thought you reach behind your back and pull out...
For Gilda, sneezing powder-laced catnip. For Dash, a rainbow cupcake. Do NOTHING to the cupcake, her paranoia will do it all. When she refuses, eat it in front of her with great joy. Cackle Skeletor, cackle!!!
A simple rainbow frosted cupcake. Pinkie gains an excited look as she starts to bounce up and down.
"Le gasp! You made her a cupcake!? Is it laced with hot sauce? Itching powder? Oh I know, you put laxatives in there didn't you Skelly?!" She then becomes serious, "Ooooh, you’re good Skelly real good, maybe even the best! Well...besides me and Rainbow I mean."
I...didn't do anything to this thing. Just gonna make her a paranoid mess because she'll think I did something. Also they have laxatives in this world!? Geeze that must be double as disgusting... Shaking it off you just smile mysteriously and hand her the cupcake. Pinkie takes it and gives you a salute.
"Gotcha, I'll give Rainbow this laxative cupcake right away! I won't tell her a thing besides that you made it. See ya Skelly!" With that Pinkie zooms off, leaving you thinking that it might have been a bad idea to not tell her you did nothing to the cupcake.
Eh, future me’s problem. With that thought in mind you exit Sugarcube Corner with your escorts in tow to enact your plan that you thought up last night. Not before grabbing some sneezing powder Pinkie left in her room though, just in case. If the timeline is still on track Gilda should be in town today. For all I know she might attack me on sight, or Rainbow might do something rash and she'll get involved. Hopefully nothing happens, but you never know.
As you and your escorts start to head towards the market square (with an excuse that you’re meeting up with one of the Elements there) you start to think about the Gilda situation.
Denneylaw's Comment
You know considering what Gilda will do to poor Fluttershy I should try to stop it from happening. An image of a crying Fluttershy pops into your head, and you can't help but glare. Maybe use my 'psychic' visions to warn Fluttershy to stay away from Gilda? Not only do I avoid Fluttershy crying and Rainbow losing a long time friend, but I could also get Fluttershy to be less afraid of me! Maybe if I'm really lucky she might give me an appreciative hug!
You gain a huge smile at the mental image of Fluttershy hugging you, and you have to stop yourself from giggling from the adorableness. You quickly snap yourself out of it as you continue to think,
Besides this will be better then never having it resolved, even AFTER her reformation. I mean come on, what's the point of reforming a character if she never comes back?! If Ex Cult Leader Starlight can become a main character, and Trixie her best friend, then why can't Gilda?! She was adorable as a filly! Seriously Hasbro come o- Before you can continue your rant you realize that you've reached your destination.
Huh...I guess letting your mind wander does make time fly, you look around in surprise before shrugging. Whelp, time to get to work.
And so you...
BrownDog's Comment
Start setting up some flattened cardboard boxes, you draw the money symbol on one, and set the rest as a stage. Your escorts look at you in confusion, but you ignore them and their jerkish faces.
Really only one way to make a buck when you’re a strange creature in a strange land. Side show attraction work. You wait till you gather an audience and then, in full view of the lunch crowd, you begin Beat Boxing and Breakdancing your heart out.
Many of the ponies are absolutely mesmerized by your skills. They especially seem awed by your robot moves, accompanied by your sound effects. You can even see Foxtrot out of the corner of your eye looking at your awesome moves in fascination.
Hmmm. Keep being impressed Prissy Pony and I might relegate you to prank victim… You continue to showcase your Rad moves, as the audience clops their hooves and cheer. Quite a few place some bits in the soda cup you pulled from the trash.
Yes! Yes! Give alms to your dancing God little equines! Muhahahaha!!!
And at one point, you see Vinyl Scratch walk up smile at you and give you a "Heck Ya" look, as she drops a generous amount of bits into your cup. She then smiles at you sympathetically and pats her own throat, before nodding and walking away.
Alright, a famous background pony! Still haven't met Derpy yet...Wait a minute, Vinyl's never spoken in the show! Is she Mute Too?! By the time you get up off the floor and look through the crowd you lose sight of her. You decide to add meeting up with her to the list to find out how a mute pony acts in this world. Could be helpful.
After what could either be hours, or only minutes (it’s hard to tell when your dance moves are this awesome), you hear chuckling from the crowd.
"Heh, you must be that demon monster thing Dash was talking about. Pretty sick moves you've got there."
And that's how you meet Gilda.
The crowd of ponies practically rush to move out of the griffon’s way. You would have rolled your eyes at this if you weren't so shocked that she ran into you and not the other way around.
Great, still haven't thought up a plan for you yet and you show up! Also, demon monster? Really Dash? Couldn't think of anything better? Noticing your deadpanned stare the griffon chuckles before saying,
"Yeah, Dash was never good when it came to nicknames. Always was too general with them.” This only serves to confuse you.
Okay one, why are you telling me this? And Two, why are you friendly with me? If Dash told you about me then why are you acting all nice and not like a total jerk like the show? Before your mind can spiral down a tunnel of questions Gilda asks you,
"Hey, why don't you come with me for awhile? I want to ask you some questions.” You scoff and point to your money sign and your dance floor.
“Hate to say it pal, but your audience kind of took off,” she gestures around her and you finally notice the ponies have dispersed. Most likely to avoid being around her.
Oh Come On! I had a good thing going here! You groan before sighing. You then look at Gilda for a good couple of seconds to try and see if she's up to anything. After not finding anything you...
KingDouchePrick's Comment
Nod your head.
Might as well, I can always dance again later. I may not have a plan, but I do have sneezing powder if things go wrong. This is a perfect opportunity to try and see if modifying the timeline will cause any major changes. And if it does, hopefully it only gets rid of the poorly written episodes
Gilda smiles at this, though it’s kinda hard to tell with the beak and all that. As she starts to walk away you follow after picking up your cup of Bits. Your escorts shrug at each other before following. As you walk you check just how many Bits you had, and to your surprise you have 25 Bits.
Huh. Not bad. Guess ponies are more generous than I thought, unlike Rarity!
SOMETIME LATER
As you walk with the Griffon, she starts chatting with you.
“Yeesh you are freaking tall. I saw a Minotaur once, ugliest monster I ever did see. I think the ugly stick was a bit kinder on you though,” she chuckles.
Umm, thanks? She sees your confusion and just chuckles again.
“Dash has told me a few things about you. Whatever you did to tick her off must have been big, though she won’t tell me exactly what it is.” She then glares at you. “Rainbow is my best friend, so if I ever find out it was something bad, I will beat you up no sweat understand?”
Why is every creature in this place hostile towards me?! She then drops the face just as quickly as it came.
“But I believe in seeing things for myself. Besides, you can’t be all bad if you knocked out that annoying hyperactive Pink Idiot.”
She then laughs out loud, which causes her to miss your scowl at the insult to Pinkie. Before you can voice, or rather draw your disapproval, you realize something. Something very important. You’re in the middle of Gilda's 'true colors' scene from the show. You see Granny Smith up ahead, and where Gilda will steal the apple.
Alright, time to derail this episode! You get up ahead of her and start walking in the completely opposite direction. She raises a brow at your change of pace, but she follows you and continues on with the questioning.
“So listen, Dash told me you couldn’t talk right?” You nod in the affirmative. “But you can still draw some stuff out,” she points at your notepad. After another nod she stops and gets a sheepish look.
“Anyway…Rainbow Dash told me you were psychic, and that you predicted me coming here, even before she told anyone…” she lets the question hang, and you nod and show her said “prediction” page.
“So Cool…” she gasps before looking at you nervously and scratching the back of her head. “Can I…Can I ask you a question about my future?”
Okaaay, where’s this going? You think even as you hear Foxtrot sigh in frustration.
“I just want to know…am I ever going to get out of that dump of a town Griffonstone?” You are thrown for a loop. The sincerity in which she asks the question, and the combined look of hope and fear on her face makes you want to console her.
Poor Cat-Bird. I can’t tell you that, because even I don’t know. Besides, you have to stay there to make friends with Gretta and Gabby and make the town better. Well, aside from that one Griffon that left Rainbow Dash to die, she can be plucked for all I care but… Gilda suddenly pitches forward, almost eating the dirt.
“Oomph! Hey!” Gilda turns around and barks behind her.
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” a timid voice sounds off and your eyes widen.
“Why don’t you watch where you’re going?!” Gilda yells and you finally notice Fluttershy with her ducks who have backed into the Griffon.
OH CRAP! I skipped the other true color events and jumpstarted this one! Fluttershy is starting to wilt down, and you know what will happen once Gilda stands back up.
This is my chance! I can stop her before all the bad stuff happens and make her reformation not take Four Years! Adorable Little Kid Gilda will live on in this fluffy Bird Cat! With only seconds to spare, you decide to do the only thing you seem to be good at. You...
Punch the griffon for being mean, but then pet it better. It is part cat after all. Maybe get her a treat to lighten her mood?
Punch the griffon in her foreleg, causing her to fall forward onto the ground completely.
“Ow! What the heck?!”
“Oh My Goodness!” Fluttershy sputters.
NO! That’s not how you reform things! Bad Skeletor! Crap What Do I Do Now?! The full anger of a bird and a cat are going to…wait, that’s it!
“What’s the big idea you chump?!” she gets up and glares at you. “I ought to sock you right in the-HEY! What are you-Stop That!”
NEVER!!! You mentally scream as you start petting her. You know she's part cat, and you figured she might follow cat logic.
"Cut it out!" she fights back, but you continue. "That feels...good. Stop it!" she purrs as her back arches.
Yes! Who’s a good kitty? Who’s a good kitty? You start scratching under her chin and she starts relaxing and purring more.
“Th-There’s ponies watching. C-cut it out you dweeb,” she strains.
“Oh…My…” comes the embarrassed voice of Fluttershy. You look over to her and see her hiding the eyes of the ducks from your petting antics. Looking around, you see other ponies, mostly mares, gawking at you in outrage.
What?! This is just petting! It’s not anything weird you freaking perverts!
With you momentarily distracted due to ranting, Gilda attempts to break free from your entrapment, but this only causes you both to tumble into each other...and for fate to once again screw you over as her lips land on yours.
You would curse whoever's out there for causing you to yet again kiss a non human, or for Fluttershy and the other mares on the street for thinking that you initiated this, or the fact that Gilda seems to have a faint blush and a dazed look in her eyes. You would do all that normally, but in this case you don’t because the thing is…beaks are sharp.
AAAAAHHHHH!!!! My F@#$ing Lips!!! You mentally screech as you sit up and blood drips from your cut lips onto the dazed Griffon below you. Whatever expression Gilda had disappears when she finally realizes she has some shiny human blood on her face.
"AAAAHHH!!! It's Bleeding On Me! It’s in my eye! EW EW EW!!!" Gilda cries out, trying to scramble away from you. She succeeds and flies off. When she does you get up and check your lip, and to your relief it doesn’t feel serious, but it still hurts like hell.
Oh thank God, I thought my whole lip got torn off or something. Stupid beaks and their sharpness.
“Oh My Gosh! We need to stop that bleeding ASAP,” Fluttershy gasps with her hooves to her mouth, her ducks quacking all around her. “Does anypony have any napkins?” Fluttershy asks to the crowd who look at your bleeding mouth in shock.
Oh right. Looks like I stopped that incident, only cause another one. But hey, at least Fluttershy isn’t crying. And wait a second, wasn’t Pinkie Pie watching all of th-
“SKELETOR!!!” Pinkie is suddenly clutching your side, as if she was there all along. “Oh No, Oh No! Skelly! What did Gilda do to you?!” she shouts in panic.
What? Oh Crap. I didn’t just make her a target did I?
“Her beak cut his lips up Pinkie Pie. But don’t worry, it’s going to be alright” Fluttershy explains as she hovers close and presses a wad full of napkins against your cut, and they start turning red immediately. “Oh my…” she gags and seems faintish.
Ok, I’m glad you’re coming around to me Fluttershy, and I really appreciate the first aid, but seriously haven’t you ponies ever heard of-
“Oh that settles it then. I thought she might just be a jerk, but she’s downright evil!” Pinkie yells in anger.
-Phrasing…Damn it! The more I change, the more it stays the same somehow!
WHAT DO YOU DO?
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Okay, so, this is bad. Don't worry, not every change will be like this. I mean, by the time I get my Stand, the show's canon will probably twist and turn more than a silly straw. Okay, let's try and fix this.
You immediately begin drawing, careful to keep the notepad away from your lips, weaving the tale of Glynda preparing to accost Fluttershy, and you absolutely humiliating both her and yourself at the same time.
"...So, wait, you saw that she was going to mess with Fluttershy?"
Nod.
"So you punched her in the leg,"
Nod
"Began...petting her? Or is that an ear scratch?"
...Yes? Confused Nod
"And then she kissed you for some reason,"
Don't say it like that! Scowling Nod
"...Like that changes a thing! She was still gonna hurt Fluttershy, or at least hurt her feelings. She's nuts!"
You try to hold your arms out to stop her, but she hops off, more huffy than normal.
Well, my luck can only improve from here.
"Huh...you were trying to protect the Element Bearer, huh?" Alabaster Foxtrot said, "Maybe you're not...bad-bad. I'm keepin' my eye on you, though."
To her confusion, you suddenly smugly smile. Told ya. Keep doing that and I'll definitely take you off the He-Men list. To stroke my ego further: Your next line shall be "Those weird smiles are still creepy though...stop that!", am I right?
"Those weird smiles are still creepy though...stop that!" Alabaster says, which only makes you more smug in your grin.
Pop a balloon to distract everyone before rushing for the cake. Stomp on it to save Gilda because she is a good/bad part cat that needs more petting in the future. Try and convince everyone to be nice to her so that she stays and you can be BFF's.
Also, my favorite fuck up was that one scene where Rainbow hits the glass roof above Rarity. Either that or the one with AJ launching Rainbow and she crashes into the library. Pretty much any fuck up scene where Rainbow gets hurt. I don't know why, it is just funny.
Ok, knowing whats gonna happen, if Gilda can get over what happened just than, you could use those 'psychic' powers of yours to show her what will happen, but than again, it might also fuel her anger toward these ponies even more. So maybe you can try and help derail this by setting off the pranks yourself, or defusing them if possible.
Ed from ed, edd and eddy was always the funny one to me , I guess the episode were he got grounded was one of the main character F#%k up one kinda
-----------------------
Grab pinkie and hug her tight then sit her down and have a " vision " yes foxtrot be annoyed it's the slow burn of Skeletor's wrath as she sighs again .
After your vision draw the events that happen but you also draw that the events of the show and make it clear it needs to happen but maybe tone it down a bit , it seams when you try to change too much it seams it backfires and might make it still happen but maybe slightly less or more worse or in some way come back and cause yourself harm like just a few moments ago.
Then you start to ponder maybe you could go see Luna soon , she could use a friend who knows how she's might be feeling maybe you and pinkie can go see her maybe make her a moon pie or something or get her something nice she is like your first real friend here besides pinkie .
at gilda's party skelly and gilda should share a beef sandwich in front of all of the ponies. the ponies of course get freaked out because of skelly's meat eating ways.
You sigh as Fluttershy continues to apply first aid to your lips, I really hope that getting comically injured isn't going be a pattern in my life now.
"There we go," Fluttershy says as she finishes patching up your lip, "Let me know if it starts bleeding again okay?" You nod at her and she gives you a cautious hug before walking away.
You turn your attention to Gilda, who has an odd expression on her face. She rubs the back of her head ,"Hey so about that-"
You're interrupted by a loud growl from your stomach, scaring away the other ponies nearby. You huff in frustration, Come on! Why do oyu freaking ponies need to be so dang skittish?
Gilda chuckles, "Hungry huh? Hey, I know a good place in town to eat, we can talk there." You nod and follow her.
Some Time Later...
I have seen the heavens, You think as you stare in awe, And it is in front of me.
Gilda smirks, "I knew that you'd like this place when I saw those teeth of yours. I made it a point to find a place that served meat here before coming to visit Dash." The both of you sit down at a table and wait.
An awkward silence passes by for a bit.
You cough slightly and get Gilda's attention, So about earlier, you covey this question by gesturing to your lips and drawing a scene of what happened.
You swear you see her blush for a quick second, "Honestly, I should pummel you for doing something like that. But seeing as it was an accident, I'll let it slide." She puffs up slightly, "Just don't be petting me like that again without telling me!"
You blink, confused.
She glares at you, "Look, it felt great okay? I'm not going to let that happen only once. This doesn't mean I like you or anything, but I might want the petting to happen again." The glare intensifies, "But not in public, or where anyone can see me."
You nod, still a little confused, Did I just make Gilda a tsundere?
After that, the two of you order some glorious meat, and when it arrives, you are granted the glorious sight of a roast beef sandwich. At least that's what it looks like. You take a bite and your taste buds sing as they taste meat in who knows how long. Tears forms in your eyes at the glorious taste of MEAT.
At this point, anytime Gilda starts to be mean to ponies or get mad, Skeletor will forcibly calm her down via petting, redirecting her aggression towards him.
You have another idea. Another wonderful idea. Another wonderfully terrible idea. Why not have Foxtrot set off some of the pranks instead of Gilda? This way, she will get her just desserts for laughing at you earlier, as no one laughs at Skelletor and gets away with it! Nyeh!
Purposefully knock Pinkie out to stop her from spreading the fact that Gilda is evil. Somehow the ponies watching see this as an accident. While all the ponies are distracted trying to help Pinkie, run off in the direction Gilda left (The guards stay to help Pinkie as well). When you find her try to convey being sorry as well as you can, somehow accidentally kiss her again.
"You are the first one to show me love in a long time," she says, as she forces her beak back upon you.
'MY LIPS! AHHH MY POOR LIPS!' you mentally scream as her beak digs into the cuts that are already there. You try to back away, but she stays right with you. In your attempts to back away, you trip and fall backwards into a back alley. Gilda, of course, falls on you. When you hit the ground you try to let out a scream of pain because your back landed on a particularly pointy rock, but Gilda takes your open mouth as invitation and begins to forcefully make out with you. Her tongue reaches far into the back of your mouth, making you gag. You try to hold back what is coming, but ultimately the gag reflex is too great a foe for Skelator, and you throw up in her face.
Gilda gets off of you and freaks out, and then runs away again. You do not pursue again, out of embarrassment and the fact that your back hurts so much that you can barely get up.
Your guards show up finally and find you laying in a pool of your own vomit, your face covered in blood. The guards think that Gilda did this to you (which is kind of correct) and, with the help of Ponyville, drive out Gilda; and all you can do is watch.
8383338 has a good line of thought. Follow it!
I have no idea what to add on to this?
Besides trying to stop or at least persuade Pinkie Pie to not think so bad of Gilda by having Skeletor show images of the griffon having a temper problem and cases of jealousy along with slight racial problems which she shows through her anger and hidden side of discomfort and awkwardness that she masks behind her stern and rude attitude.
Rarity comes running up to you as she is in a sneezeing fit as she opens her mouth to talk ,you hold up a picture basically saying I told you so and then you look over to foxtrot and her partner and you hold up a drawing of her partner telling her so only we're she can see it .
She gives you the stink eye as her partner comes over and bumpers her " see fox I told you it can see glimpses of the future" she glances back to you with a heavy glare as you give a grinchy grin and start strutting away as your Skeletor complex starts to spark once more .
There should still be some kind of blow up by Gilda at the party, maybe it's at Dash herself since Rainbow will rag on her for hanging out with You, instead of her.
Of course, the blow up doesn't get too bad with you there to calm things down.
Also, devolve the party into a food fight so that everyone has cake and pranks on them, which also serves to keep Foxtrot from retaliating against you for all the pranks you made her set off.