• Member Since 23rd Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen 47 minutes ago

The Albinocorn


Super smug spectacular star student: Sunset Shimmer.


T

After one night of drunken passion, scientific research, and magic, Sunset and Twilight wake up to discover they built an android. Upon effectively becoming parents, they name their artificial child, Dawn.

But on top of being unprepared for parenthood, Sunset and Twilight learn that Dawn might not be as well put together as they thought.

All magic fades eventually. What happens to Dawn when her spark goes out? While she explores the ups and downs of friendship and love, her mothers struggle with questions of whether or not she's real, and how much are they willing to sacrifice for their artificial daughter?

Concept inspired by Crydius.

Thanks to Novel Idea, Justice3442, and Oroboro .

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 63 )

Oh hey you finally published this. Neato!

Sorry I never got around to editing that second chapter. Whoops.

Oh this is going to be interesting.

:facehoof:*Trying to remember where this came from*

:pinkiehappy:*Finally remembers where it came from*

Well, didn't expect this to come out. Let's see how this goes...

Will there be an evil robot?

aceina #5 · 2 weeks ago · · · β. ·

oooh loving this already so when is pressure gona be put on sunset and scitwi to be married

I love the comics that created Gamma (aka Dawn), so I'm gonna love reading this! :pinkiehappy:

This is going to be an interesting ride.

Fangren #8 · 2 weeks ago · · · β. ·

Well, this is fun (for now, at least). Although the prospect of getting the magical robot girl of uncertain origin and nature to be friends with the human versions of the CMCs is...a little terrifying. A disaster, or series of disasters, waiting to be happen probably.

I look forward to it. :pinkiehappy:

Dawn...I have a feeling that that name was also chosen because Sunset Shimmer and Twilight are parts of day as well. Also, awesome story!

This will be interesting.

Instant like and follow because your writing is what makes me not want to leave this site

While I generally gravitate towards lighter and more comedic fare, I'm looking forward to seeing where you take this premise, especially given the way you write Sunset and Twilight.

“Mother Units, this woman is hugging me without my permission. Should I activate my sexual assault alarm?” Dawn asked.

:facehoof:

Well. At least she has the standard option package.

By the way, if you want, I could draw Dawn?

Love so far.

Shilic #16 · 2 weeks ago · · 1 · β. ·

Didn't Justice already do this? Not complaining, though. More Sunset is always good.

The very concept of this story, while not necessarily anything new, is amazing. This is exactly the sort of situation where your Sunset and Twilight will thrive, and I can't wait to read more. Which is why I'm going to read the next chapter. Right now.

Damn it albinocorn! I have things to do! Places to be! People to meet!

...

Well, they can wait, I guess.

“Oh, you know. We just modified some existing software and enhanced her response potential.” Sunset grinned widely, hoping Dawn wasn’t programmed to only be honest.

I really don't know if you should be joking about this, Sunset, considering this sort of thing might run in her--

*is jabbed in the arm for that other series reference*

Yep, I still love this. All of the reactions are pretty much exactly as I expect, which I mean in a good way. Dawn is adorable, and at this rate she stands to remain adorable for awhile until I get tired of her. Thankfully, based on the synopsis, I doubt that will be an issue.

The story is still too fresh to invite a much deeper analysis, so I'll leave things here.

Holy shit. Someone competent decided to write about that silly android idea? Looking forward to something actually entertaining to read for a change. Hurry up and finish. :D

This was adorable and hilarious and it really gets to the feels in the life brought to Dawn and her relation to Sunset and Twilight.

I'm liking this already! Please continue! :twilightsmile:

JMP
JMP #25 · 2 weeks ago · · · α. ·

I'm still following Don't Drink and Science. That story was hilarious

Was smiling all the way through from all of the cuteness overloads and the comedy. Rarity's reaction was the best and it's good to see them all getting ready to help Sunset and twilight raise Dawn. Hopefully Dawn will win over Applejack soon enough.

This sounds like an interesting concept... I'll give it a go.

Yep. Definitely an interesting concept. I think I'll stick, and see where this goes.

More so than anything, I think, is the revelation that their trepidation comes not from guesswork and uncertainty, but their realization that they created a soul. That is so much more than just a hyper-advanced AI capable of self-awareness, and suddenly implies a whole lot of different stuff. Like: Is it the same kind of "soul" as Twilight and Sunset?

Well presented and intriguing. The prose fell flat at times, but as a whole it was an enjoyable experience.

Premise reminds me of the story where a guy buys a Rarity... thing, that you put together yourself and it's just like the real pony, but he got his off-brand, and it ended up being all sorts of messed up, like calling him Dining instead of Darling, being in pain all the time, having trouble walking, ect. He loves it anyways and treats it like a child until it dies three years later. Then he buys a new, proper one to fill the hole in his heart, but it's not the same.

The only thing that makes me worried is Dawn's core. We don't know how stable that thing is or if it can run out.

“Good morning, Mother Units,” a young, female voice said. It was light and cheery, though it carried a robotic undertone. “The time now is nine o’clock. As requested, I have come to deliver your morning wake up call.” The teal eyes flashed an emerald green, and Sunset heard a light scanning noise. “It appears you are both low on hydration, reaching only fifty percent of optimum levels. Would you like water?”

Is, this based on that one crackfic that was (probably) written just Justice3442?

“Guh.” Twilight stared off into space, her glasses still askew from sleeping on her side. She took a long sip of her water, swished in her mouth before swallowing, and took a deep breath. “Sunset, what did we do?”

Apart from each other?

Spike shrugged as well as a dog could. “The basics. You girls came barging in, giggling and going on about how you wanted to make a baby or something.” Twilight let out a mortified groan. “Then you went into the garage and were working all night. I got bored really fast, so I went to sleep. But it looks like you did it.”

I love this dog.

mortified groaned

Groan.

Twilight kept flipping through the notes. “Well, she doesn’t seem dangerous.”

“Isn’t that what you thought about the first magic device?”

That is a VERY valid point.

Sunset understood then. They hadn’t just made a robot. While it was still mechanical and synthetic, they had done the impossible.

They had made a soul.

A mechanical soul. You did something not even the guy who made Data from Star Trek could do. What took him no doubt years if not decades, you did in a night while half drunk.

From there, many ideas were formed. Justice decided to take a more comical approach to the subject with his Don't Drink and Science, while Oroboro and I decided to take things a little more seriously.

That's about what I figured.

Sunset shrugged. “They don’t have to know Dawn’s half magic. You’re their prodigy kid; I’m sure they’d believe you if you just told them we built her from scratch.” Twilight opened her mouth, but Sunset beat her to the punch. “And it’s technically not lying because we did build her, we just don’t know how.”

She has a point. She's good at that.

“You… built her?” Night repeated. “When? How?

In order, yes, last night, and no idea, they were drunk.

“Every parent wants grandkids, I guess.”

I suppose so.

“I have three hours logged into my active status.” When and Night and Velvet giggled, she tilted her head. “Oh, did you mean my designated age? I am designed to be fourteen years old.”

Huh, interesting.

Applejack recovered first, working her jaw for a bit before saying, “Let me get this straight. Y’all got drunk, and instead of going at it like jackrabbits like normal people, you went and built a robot in one night that runs on magic, and you decided to call it your daughter?”

Yes.

“Mother Units, this woman is hugging me without my permission. Should I activate my sexual assault alarm?” Dawn asked.

Oh neat, you have that.

“Thank you, Mother Unit Alpha.” She walked away, taking quick steps to keep up with Pinkie’s skips. Her optic lenses managed to look a little apprehensive.

Everyone is at least slightly apprehensive about Pinkie Pie.

A growl of disapproval came from Applejack’s throat, but she said, “Ah trust you two. But until proven otherwise, Ah’m keepin’ my guard up.”

That's perfectly fair. I'd probably do the same.

Twilight beamed and wiped a tear from her eye. “You girls are the best.”

They are. It's good to have friends that support you like this.

8471800
Justice3442 and Albinocorn's stories were both inspired by the comic done by Crydius on deviantart.

Looking great! The amulet is a very good touch.

Ri2
Ri2 #36 · 2 weeks ago · · · α. ·

8471800
Maybe Data's dad could've done it faster if he got drunk?

8472575

Maybe. But, he's dead I think, so he likely won't get to find out.

Ri2
Ri2 #38 · 2 weeks ago · · · β. ·

Oh my god Dawn's adorable though if she DOES survive whatever's happening to her, what kind of future does she have as an eternal teen?

8471182
I'm not going to say no, but she's not exactly my character, so I can't say yes?
Do what you will?

8472633
Oh. What do you mean by not exactly yours?

8472651
The actual character was made by Crydius on Deviantart.

After 24 hours and another chapter. Yep, still interesting. Though I hope for some more vocal development. She might have a large vocabulary, but her speech pattern is very unemotional :P

Rarity giggled. “You know what they say. ‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ And if we set her up with our sisters, I’m sure we’ll find plenty of time to spend together.”

Waaaaaait.... I thought they were worried about the robot being dangerous?

Setting her up with them would only guarantee the danger. And tree sap. :rainbowwild:

Through this whole thing I couldn't help but think of this.

With that ominous description, I don't think Dawn is the primary menace here. Still, best to enjoy things while they last, same as with anyone. I look forward to seeing where you go with this.

And if we set her up with our sisters, I’m sure we’ll find plenty of time to spend together.

Why do I hear the bells of doom tolling? :rainbowderp:

Ohoho this is gonna be a fun ride all around. Just waiting for her to have a reason to bust out the ion cannon

Ermahgerd, yes. All of my yes.

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