This suit is... surprisingly comfortable
It was the sunlight making its way through a gap in the curtains that woke me up. My eyes opening slowly as I hated the sun and took stock of the fact I woke up in my living room.
Everything seemed normal at first glance, right down to the dust on the glass coffee table.
Sitting upright I noticed I was wearing pants with one purple leg and one red. This was particularly odd because I knew for certain I had no clothes of either colour in my house.
Rubbing my eyes, I mumbled under my breath, "I need coffee," before a puff of purplish smoke appeared with a poof sound and my favourite coffee mug appeared on the coffee table, with the faintest traces of steam wafting up from it.
As I cautiously reached for the mug, I noticed a purple sleeve on my arm and decided to finally actually take a look at what I was wearing. I stood and looked down, I took in the strange suit with unusual swirls and lines that was vertically split between red and purple, a fairly loose-fitting belt with a silver buckle holding a blade near my left hip and an older-style of neat, white cravat tied around my neck.
And yet, it was all very comfortable. Nothing tight or restrictive, nothing stiff or hard. I honestly don't think I've ever had even a set of pyjamas as comfortable as these clothes.
"Where in the blazes did theee..." I trailed off as I heard what I was saying come out in a thick Scottish...ish... accent.
'I need a mirror,' I thought when in another puff of purplish smoke a full length mirror appeared beside me.
And I immediately started to panic.
I fell backwards into my glass coffee table, smashing it instantly, and given the age of it and the sentimental value of it being around for as long as I could remember, I snapped out of my panic over becoming a Daedric Prince and started panicking over it, and started muttering, "It can't be broken," over and over, when it too was consumed in smoke, suddenly intact. The glass actually looked new and the old metal legs looked freshly polished!
With the combined shocks somehow balancing each other out, I was able to take a few minutes and gather myself enough to properly examine myself in the mirror that had appeared earlier.
The first thing I noticed was that my hair was now white, when it used to be a dark coppery red.
The second was that it was longer than I had ever let it be before.
Then I noticed how much I'd been aged. Overnight, I went from early twenties to forty-something, at LEAST.
Finally, I came to the beard.
...
It's a good beard. Perfect length to stroke slowly and make people feel uncomfortable around you.
Then the realisation hit me on who I appear to be and that everything that was happening, the coffee, the mirror and even the coffee table fixing itself, must have been because of my doing through magic, or power, or... whatever you'd call what Sheogorath does.
And then, of course, being the game nerd I am, I had to drop some quotes while watching my reflection.
"You know, I was there for that whole sordid affair. Marvellous time! Butterflies, blood, a fox, a severed head. Oh-ho-ho! And the cheese! To die for."
I probably would have gone on with more, but there came a knocking at my front door. Peeking out my window I could hardly believe what I saw.
Ponies!
Ponies everywhere, and a group of little ones approaching my doorstep.
Of course, being a Brony myself, I immediately recognised the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Pipsqueak, Rumble, Snips, Snails and Dinky Doo... And had to take a few minutes to cope with the fact I was apparently in Equestria as well.
That said, I felt some modicum of relief when there came a knocking on my door, snapping me back to reality. Whichever one this happened to be.
Of course, being a bigger geek than I was a Brony, so of course I opened the door with another quote.
"Do you mind? I'm busy doing the Fish-stick. It's a very delicate state of mind."
And with that, they all ran away screaming, except for Rumble and Pip, who both just stared at me.
"What?, were you expecting some tentacle monstrosity or something? Because that's more Hermaeus Mora's thing."
Pipsqueak spoke up first. "Hi! We were just wondering who you were since your house appeared out of nowhere on the empty lot! My name's Pipsqueak, and this is rumble," he said, gesturing to his friend, who seemed a bit stunned considering all he could manage was a nod an a half-hearted wave.
"I know who the two of you are. So tell me, how can I help you?"
"We were just wondering who you were. And if you don't mind us asking, what are you?"
As I racked my brain, I realised I couldn't remember my own name, but given how direct his query as, I felt compelled to answer with, "The name's Sheogorath, and as to the what, I suppose you could say I'm a God of Madness! Or more accurately, THE God of Madness. Although, that's not entirely accurate either. I'm actually the Daedric Prince of Madness."
Of course, I never expected them to both exclaim, "Neat!", but I know I should have.
After a brief moment of awkward silence, I asked, "If you're not too busy, would you care to come in for some snacks? You can tell me about your little town," and as I finished the sentence, my coffee table was consumed in smoke and on it had appeared silver trays filled with an assortment of biscuits, including Oreos and two cups of piping hot tea in plain mugs.
Their eyes widened a little, but I think that was from the magic, and they smiled as they came in and sat down, immediately chewing through a few.
"So, tell me," I started as I went over to the TV and started changing some wires, "What brought you and your little gang of Junior Heroes to my door this mornin'?"
Rumble, having his interest in the snacks and drink fall to curiosity over what I was doing answered. "I don't know about the others, but I was just tagging along with the group."
"And you, Pip?"
Quickly swallowing his mouthful, he said, "My mum told me to be polite and introduce myself to the new pony in town. I bet she'll be surprised to learn you're not a pony at all!"
"Ah."
As I continued screwing around with the wires behind my TV, they must have started checking out my book-case, because I heard Rumble say, "You have a lot of games here, don't you?"
Without looking, I answered, "Absolutely. There's a few there that are almost as old as I am."
A brief pause as I processed what I had said.
"Well, not as old as I am as Sheogorath, but as old as the me that lives in this house. Does that make sense?"
I should have expected them to both say, "No," in perfect unison.
And with that I finished setting up the good old Nintendo 64, and started up Mario Kart, plugging in three controllers, quickly garnering their attentions as I offered them a controller each.
Of course, before we could actually start a game, there came another knock at the door.
With a sigh, I got up saying, "You guys pick the track and your characters, while I see who's at the door. Don't start without me."
Opening the door, I was met with a... slightly irritated Twilight Sparkle and surprisingly calm Thunderlane.
Before either of them could say anything, I opened the door fully, making the two colts visible, while saying, "Rumble, your brother's here."
Looking away from the TV, Rumble waved and then turned back almost immediately, clearly not realising that he never told me about his brother, and I saw most of the tension in Thunderlane's muscles relax.
"Care to join us? We're about to start up a racing game," I offered as a fourth controller, which I'd never had before appeared near the system, to which the older pegasus, gave a small smile and gave his thanks for keeping his little brother out of trouble as he trotted in and set himself up on the lounge, above the two younger colts.
Looking back at my door, I asked, "So how can I help you, Miss Sparkle?", clearly catching her by surprise with the fact that I apparently knew her name, given the way she was stuttering in confusion.
This was of course an easy fix, because when I booped her on the nose, the purple unicorn went cross-eyed before glaring at me as I pulled my hand away.
"How do you know who I am?" She asked, with great suspicion.
I threw her a non-committal shrug. "Cosmic powers or some-such. Now, what do you want?"
"I want you to tell me what you are and what you're doing here," she answered, pointing with her hoof, presumably in what was meant to be an accusatory manner.
"No."
The hoof came down slowly. "What?"
"Well, why on earth would I tell you anything when you asked so impolitely?"
"Because you and your... residence appeared out of nowhere?!"
"Well, that's no excuse for bad manners, now is it?"
With that she took a breath and calmed down a little. "Would you please tell me who and what you are and what you're doing here?"
"Much better. Now, you can call me Sheogorath, and I'm a Daedric Prince. As for what I'm doing, I'm just getting settled in."
"And can you tell me how you got here?"
"Nope."
And the calmness started fading from her face. "Why can't you?"
Keeping myself calm, I answered, "Because I've no bloody idea myself."
And then her eye started twitching. "Then can you at least tell me what you're planning on doing with Pipsqueak, Rumble and Thunderlane?"
"Well, I was planning on enjoying a few snacks an-," I managed before getting cut off by a beam of purple magic was blasted into the centre of my chest, but to me only felt like a mild warmth.
Looking down at myself, I could quite clearly see she hadn't even so much as disturbed my suit, much less done anything to even remotely hurt me, despite the cloud of smoke obscuring me from her vision.
As Twilight stood there, both enraged and stunned at my indifference to her attack, she started spouting something about how I was some 'pony eating monster' and that she would see me 'banished to Tartarus', only to stop and start gaping once the smoke cleared, revealing that all she'd achieved was to piss me off.
I let bit of my geek show again and shouted, "How rude! Can't even be bothered to allow a mad god to entertain a few guests without attempting to assault him! Harrumph! I say I'm quite done with you. I bid you good day now, so Leave Me Be!"
With that, Twilight seemed to visibly stiffen and started stepping back away from my door as I shut it, barely noticing the various startled ponies who'd ben going about their day before the incident started.
Turning and heading for the lounge, I grabbed an ANZAC biscuit and sat next to Thunderlane, picking up my own controller, saying, "We'd best skip ahead to Rainbow Road, because I think I'll be getting a visit sometime soon from the Princess."
He looked at me with some confusion. "Why do you think that?"
"Because I believe I just scared the living daylights out of Twilight Sparkle, and she's more than likely written to her by now."
Of course, we didn't even make it to Rainbow Road before there came yet another knocking at the door.
With a sigh, I got up again.
"Visitors all day today."
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Promising beginning, though it is a little to similar to that 'eldritch horror' fic, but seems to be aware of it already.
Just a tip though, 2nd person tag applies to stories where 'you' is used instead of 'I' when describing what the main character is doing. You are using first person, so the tag does not apply.8290688
I did make this to be in much the same vein as My Life as an Eldritch Horror.
And I've fixed the tag.
I was quite horrendously sick and could barely think straight a few nights ago when I got started on this, so I'm surprised I didn't make more mistakes than that.
8290708
I love this and it reminds me of it sooo much. You are doing good so far, a few grammar things but I enjoy the story so far.
8290731
Thank you.
That's very encouraging.
8290751
Welcome and I love comedies like this
Don't forget that Sheogorath is also the Daedric Prince of Creativity.
More
8290778
I'm just leaving it at Madness.
If I went into ALL of his titles, it'd be several times the length it already is.
A bit similar, but I'll track in the hopes it doesn't become as... odd, as Eldritch has.
Not a big fan of its weird, rambling story.
8290782
No.
Not yet.
I'm pushing my physical limitations as it is, given I was blowing wads of blood out of my nose when I started this fic.
I'm going to leave starting the second chapter until I'm fully recovered.
8290785
Doh!
8290784
I make no promises.
This one's just started, and I have no idea where I'll be taking it.
Just... don't expect consistency in terms of chapter release.
As it is, I'm rather horribly ill and won't even be STARTING chapter 2 until I've recovered.
OH MAH GAH! Must Read!
8290791
That’s how I originally wrote MLaaEH.
Also I hope you get well soon.
That's brown-orange...
I feel a bit overwhelmed that I inspired this. On reading, I couldn’t stop laughing. I mean this.
Also When Eldritch and Sheogorath meet.
E: “Weird, we’ve got the same introduction.”
S: “I know! It’s brilliant! It’s like the cosmic powers who write us were aware of something We’re not.”
*Both look over at pinkie.*
P: “What?”
E: Well that’s disappointing.”
S: “Right, totally killed the mood.”
I am... curious, about where you are going with this so... welcome to the tracking folder.
well this will be a fun ride to be on
gods i love a good dose of mad god. can you do it right? i shall see
More please
We should probs keep Sheo AWAY from Discord.
this is AWESOME
Loving it, keep working it 👍
8290791
You should totally to take some inspiration from the story called Discord vs Sheogorath. That story was amazing, and it'll be great to see some scenes like that story in the future.
I am immediately intrigued.
great so far
I love this already.
This sounded like a Displaced story, except without the merchant and the displaced universes.
Dang, this is one of those fake crossovers, isn't it? Like, it's not actually the interesting character Sheogorath being crossed over with MLP, but yet another SI with a cheap mask pretending to be that character.
Seriously, these stories should not be allowed to have the crossover tag. It just should be SI and nothing else, because at the end of the day, this is not Sheogorath from the Elder Scrolls, but an SI.
I noticed you got featured. Congrats.
Derpy: “Eld... Why are there so many foals running around?”
Eldritch: “Hmmmm? Oh Sheo brought over his set for a play date kinda thing.”
Sheogorath: “It’s simply delightful! Look at them all!”
Derpy: “Well it is kinda cute. How do you keep track of them all?”
Eldritch: “Like this. Children! Xbox LAN Party! Halo CE! Prisoner Rockets!”
*All three get covered in foals.*
yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES yes yes yes yes YES. Keeep going this is good stuff, it's like pizza with pie's stuffed into the crust.
8291821
Thank you for recommending it, I'll check it out when I have time.
8292158
I did?
...
Huh.
Would you look at that?
...
I would question the sanity of all the people who seem to like my work, but that would be contradictory to what this fic's about, wouldn't it?
8292406
Indeed. I asked the same thing when mine started blowing up.
Kinda disappinted that it wasn't the real Sheogorath that this happened to. The title implies this is about the real Sheogorath, given it only makes sense if it was really him commenting on the fact he isn't in the Shivering Isles anymore, so it almost feels like clickbait.
This is great man! And did I spot some Anzac cookies?
8292532
We don't call them ' Anzac cookies' in Australia.
It's just plain... weird... to call them 'Anzac cookies'.
They're biscuits.
...
...
...
I've got to get myself a Jumbo Cookie next time I go past Muffin Break.
8292560
Thing is... I am Australian
8292562
You watching the Origin?
8292563
No, not a sports fan myself
8292562
Also, that just makes it even weirder.
8292565
Fair enough.
8292566
I am not what one might call... a traditional Aussie, but I was born and raised here
8292563
But I do hope you have a good time watching it
8292566
I probably should've mentioned that I said cookies on accident, just been a while since I've had one is all
8292168
so much yes in that statment
8292585
I'm a PlayStation man, so it went over my head.