• Member Since 21st Apr, 2015
  • offline last seen 8 minutes ago

JackRipper


Real eyes realize real lies.


T

They're gone... and they're never coming back.

It was a spontaneous decision, one that I regret every waking moment. At the time, when I had to choose between my friends and all the alicorn magic in Equestria, I didn't answer the question fast enough.

They're dead now, and the worst part? I won.


Pre-read by randome284.
Edited by Dreams of Ponies.
Proofread by Nightmare Darkness and additional post-edits by AAIQU.
Cover art by dream--chan on Deviantart.
Featured 7/15/17 - 7/18/17, thanks guys!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 125 )

...At times, many wish they could go back and change It. Their greatest mistake. What they'd done leading to it, anything that could have even remotely been related to It...

Because they hate the result that they'd gotten. And often times...

...They forget, that in the rush to undo themselves...

They inflict that same pain on others.

Well done, very well done. You show a great deal of promise my friend, and I'm glad to have been the first to comment and like this work. I look forward to seeing such in the future.

Sincerely,
Hunter Redflame.

8299803
Thank you, that means a lot to me. :heart:

8299807
*Gives a polite bow.*

That was deep... Really deep.

8299816
Thank you, that was the goal. :scootangel:

8299816
Well you nailed it in one, incredible piece of work.

Huk
Huk #8 · July 15th · · ·

Sad, but inspiring at the same time - thank you.

One can only imagine, how Twilight (or any real person for that matter) feels, after surviving something traumatic, when his friends/family/comrades have died. Survivor's guilt is a real bitch :applecry:

P.S.
Thanks for the SFM, Thomas Bergersen and 'Two Steps From Hell,' once connected with the right video, can make anybody cry :fluttercry:

8299849
My editor told me he got mad vibes from it, so I linked it in the A/N for anybody who hasn't seen it to watch it. Truth be told, I'd forgotten about it while writing this, but I'm glad he brought it up. :twilightsheepish:

I'm quietly singing "Vale Decem" to the five that turned the dark shadows that lurk the night into the peaceful light of the moon, the five who return order and harmony, when chaos itself has divided them, the five that fell when they chose the path, the path they chose to give a chance for their home, their friends, their family to broke free from the clutches of a demon. may they rest in peace.

8299857
That's certainly a poetic way to phrase it. :twilightsmile:

Huk

8299851

My editor told me he got mad vibes from it

Well then, he is not alone...

Somehow, reading about how Twilight describes the silence, reminded me of this:

Somehow, this seems appropriate too :fluttercry:

8299862
Anything that makes it better, right? :pinkiesmile:

Huk

8299870

Hmm, you know, when you think of it, this is funny in some twisted kind of way - both the story, as well as the linked songs, makes you feel somewhat depressed... but good at the same time. Human psyche is a mess :twilightoops:

That ending was a little too dark for my tastes but, overall, this was well done.

8299886
Well, the tragedy and the dark tag are a pretty nasty cocktail. Thank you, though. :heart:

8299893
Heh, I didn't even see the Tragedy tag.

So deep, dark and depressing. Make it written well, like you wrote this one, and it's one of my top favorites. Outdo yourself and make it this amazing? It becomes one of my all-time favorite stories on the site. :twilightsmile: You did such a good job on it, Jack.

Have an upvote and favorite

8300011 You're welcome.

... now, I'm gonna cry for an hour... over a gallon of ice cream...

8300014
You know what you signed up for when you clicked on the story and read the tags. :raritywink:

8300018 Yes... yes, I do... doesn't make it any easier... :raritydespair:

Will you do one on Discord, I can see luna confronting after this chapter to inform him of Twilight's death.
to further drive more guilt into him, i love Discord but in this fic the outcome was all his fault.

8300033
If enough people clamor for it, I don't see why not. :scootangel:

Very nice! A few errant errors here and there, but nothing glaring. Well done!

8300098
I'm doing editing and it now, and thank you. :heart:

This is so sad but so good. Great job!!!

Suicide? Should've taken Luna up on a new friendship and learned from her. But I guess a short story deserves a fast ending.

8300514
I hadn't really planned to make this a super big story, it just kind of came to me spontaneously. :twilightsheepish:

Wait how did they die? The curious in me wants to know. (I'm hazarding a guess it has something to do with the bubbles closing and crushing them into pulp, but...)

That was a well written story that I wish I had never read. Have a like. I shant be reading a story like this again.

8300549
I had an idea in my mind as to how they died, but to describe it in detail would lead to me having to change the rating. :unsuresweetie:

I think it's best if it's left up to the reader's imagination.

8300556
That's fair. Though I mean I wouldn't say no if you were willing to PM it. :scootangel:

Wow. I don't know what to say except wow. My emotions are currently a mess. Take a well deserved like friend.

Now that was a fine story. Dark and lovely with a steady pace. Sometimes victory comes at a high price. Good job!

Haven't I seen this before?

8300887
There was a similar one; Twi got the Alicorn Amulet.

8300887
Heck if I know, I came up with this own my own. :derpytongue2:

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