• Member Since 7th Jul, 2017
  • offline last seen Yesterday

YourDashOneDawn


Those that live in darkness have one advantage: they will fight to keep what little light remains.


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My first story, and hopefully not my last. I understand that most of the fandom despises alicorn "OC"s, but I wanted to put this one out there. I didn't base this on Sunset, but looking back, there are some similarities. Just a few.

She was another student of Celestia's, who passed the tests, and got everything she could have wanted, until something changed, and she made a mistake. Lives were ruined, including her own. Now Dawn wants to right her wrongs, but doesn't know how to get back on track.

Chapters (9)
Comments ( 5 )

I'll check this out later. I have no problem with alicorn OCs, as long the story is a good read.:twilightsmile:

I'd love to know what you think, once you get to it. I'm still learning as I go. :pinkiehappy:

Hhmm. A quick start... too quick to be honest, and a bit being lect in the dark. Nearing the end I have to say that there is no way an alicorn would be forgotten so easily in a decade. Especially when it had been fighting close to Ponyville with the Changling Queen.:moustache:

There is also a slight lack of details about our main character but I assume that will be added later.

A bit of a short chapter which could have used more details and more world building. Also the character interaction started on a slight "too good note".

And how come she knows of Starlight's wrong doing from across Equestria when can't keep track of what is happening in the small town next to her "house"?

This is not banttering mind you, these are things that are standing out to me. :twilightsmile:

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I plan to rewrite almost the entire story later on, but I don't seem to have as much free time lately. When I go back through, I'll use all of the advice I've gotten, on-site and off. Thanks for the help! :twilightsmile:

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