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Spike is a full adult and has lived for hundreds of years. The elements are long gone, a memory. Celestia and Luna have moved the capitol of Equestria to Ponyville and have moved into Twilight's old castle. Spike has been summoned back home at the behest of the royal sisters but for what he does not know. But if Celestia asked Spike the Guardian of Equestria...he will answer.
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This was cool like to see more.
Okay, so, just reading the description, it implies that the entire mane six, including Twilight, are dead. But isn't Twilight an alicorn? Both dragons and alicorns have been shown in the cartoon to live for thousands of years. If this is an AU where alicorns aren't actually immortal/might as well be immortal, why are the two sisters, Celestia and Luna alive, yet Twilight is not?
Edit: I've skimmed the first few paragraphs and it seems that there are a lot of places where commas need to be added. Despite the large word count, the dialogue so far is rushed and it seems like you're skipping sentences or chopping them in half and sewing them together, rather than writing a full, flowing conversation. It sounds like an oxy-moron, but they're like rushed run on sentences. I suggest getting an editor for now! That would probably fix one of the bigger problems with the story so far :)
8359274
haha well only born alicorns are immortal, Also it has been said Twilight will not outlive her friends so I just went with that as the world that would look like that.
8359280
Thanks for replying! Also, would you mind if I volunteered as an editor for your stories, if you don't already have one? I don't mean to be rude, but there are quite a bit of grammatical errors here, and a few spelling ones. Just to catch the errors!
This is so well writen the fells are real.
8359280
Wrong. At least, i think so.
Didn't celestia and luna say flurry was the first time an alicorn was born? Meaning that they themselves weren't born as alicorns? I also believe it was mentioned somewhere that it was starswirl who assigned them the task of raising/lowering the sun/moon, further backing up that they earned their alicorn status just like cadence and twilight.
8359349
Celestia and Luna were born alicorns. It is said in the actual sisters book and a few other sources. Also an interview with Lauren Faust said that twilight wouldn't outlive her friends. This is just how i wanted to story to play out.
8359361
Hey don't worry. Npt here to argue about your story, you can have that play out however you want.
I just enjoy discussions about the whole topic of alicorns and immortality and let that get the better of me
Gonna be reading your story once i'm in the mood
as for as i recall from the thread, there's gonna be an undead dragon that gets taken out in the good oldfashioned way?
8359367
haha read and find out
8359361
The more I see that elusive comment by Faust saying that Twilight will not outlive her friends, the more that I really think that the other mares in the Mane 6 are gonna become alicorns at some point, and as a result get the benefit of extended longiveity (if not immortality). After all, one could say that each of the mane 6 are complete examples of the parts of friendship: Honesty (Applejack), Loyalty (Rainbow Dash), Generousity/Inspiration (Rarity), Laughter (Pinkie Pie), Kindness (Fluttershy), and the Magic of Friendship (Twilight Sparkle). Considering that Twilight ascended to Alicornhood, it's not that much of a stretch to think that the other mares could earn Alicornhood as well. Of course there could be the possibility that something happends and all six of the Mane 6 perish together in some gargantuan battle or other significant event that cost all of them their lives...that would also complete the adage of "Twilight will not outlive her friends".
8362704
I leave it vague in this story because I don't want to go into detail because it might pull away from the story itself, but if you want me to I will put it in the epilog I'm writing next chapter.
are there going to be more of this story or is this finished with and open ending?
8362744
It's supposed to be a one shot but I left it open for an epilogue and others that might want to keep writing it. I might do more with it a little later.
Yeah. I never once liked Bray. Fuck Bray.
Please can you do a squeal?
9200225
You want me to?
Yes please it was just so heart braking i just need to know.
Found this for you and while I don't do punctuation Abort mission and.... is right about the commas.
and then recondition dawned on her [ recognition ]
That was beautiful