"Wow, I never thought something this beautiful would reside in the Everfree." Twilight said, completly blown away by the scene before her.
After hours of trudging through thick shrub and the mysterious unknown, the group of seven came to a clearing at the base of a waterfall that crashed down into a crystal clear lake. The lake sat still only being disturbed by the ripples from the colliding water. A soft surrounding of short grass being the only thing separating the trees and the pool.
It was such a sight that even Rarity had broken her focus from the 'icky' mud.
"I think here is as good of a spot as any to set up camp, what do y'all think?" Applejack asked, placing her bag on the grass.
"Look at that water... It's absolutely magnificent!" Rarity squeed.
"Last one in's a rotten apple!" Spike shouted before tearing off his shirt and making a beeline for the lake, only to meet the ground mere feet before the water's edge. He looked up as there was a splash, sending a few drops over him. "What the fuck, Dash!"
Rainbow Dash laughed at Spike's misery as Applejack and Pinkie Pie rushed into the water.
"Spike, Watch your language!" Twilight scolded him only making Dash laugh harder.
Spike got up with huff and was just about step into the water when a hand on his shoulder stopped him.
"Oh don't worry about them, Spikey. We're all here to have fun." Rarity said before kissing him on the cheek and running to her swimming friends. The now blushing dragon forcefully calmed himself as his newly grown wings threaten to extend against his will. Another huff escaped his lips before he joined them.
Back on dry land, Twilight and Fluttershy were laying out a picnic blanket and collecting the abandoned hiking bags and clothes when Fluttershy noticed something was off.
"Twilight..." She said, gaining the attention of her alicorn friend. "Do you see that tree over there?" Fluttershy pointed out to a tree on the tree line.
"You're going to have be a little more specific, Fluttershy." Twilight replied, slightly amused by the question.
"That one there."
Twlight followed her hand and sure enough there was indeed... A tree.
"It looks like a tree to me."
"I don't like it." Fluttershy said almost upset.
"Well don't look at it." Twilight was confused by how 'funny' her friend was acting. "Fluttershy, are you feeling okay?"
"I guess I'm just a bit nervous. A small family of squirrels came to my cottage early this morning, they were worried about the forest."
Twilight's confusion did nothing but grow. "Why are squirrels worried about a bunch of trees." She quizzed.
"They think that something is changing the other creatures." Fluttershy whispered, sending shivers through Twilight's fur. As spooked as she was, though, Twilight shrugged it off so they could enjoy today.
"I'm sure what ever it is isn't that bad. We can handle anything in this forest now... I am a princess."
Both mares giggle before returning to the fun they were suppose to be having. Just in time to have their attention caught by a certain drake shouting from distance.
"Look out below!"
All six mares looked to top of the waterfall to see Spike as he was about to jump. The drop was about thirty feet, so nothing too dangerous, but still enough to cause alarm to the more paranoid of the group.
"Spike! What are you doing up there!" Twilight screamed.
"Bah, I've got wings." He says while shrugging.
And away he jumps. The group gasped as Spike's body sliced through the surface of the water, making quite the splash. There was utter silence as worry grew since time was ticking on and Spike hadn't surfaced yet.
"Do you think he's alive?" Pinkie asked, breaking the ice.
"Yahoo!" Spike cheered as he burst through the surface with a fist pump before sinking back down. "What a rush." He continued as he swam back to the others in the water. Dash, Applejack and Pinkie cheered and highfived Spike.
"The food is out if any of..." Twilight didn't even get to finish her sentence before a soaking Pinkie was sitting on her lap, munching on a sandwich. "You could've at least dried yourself before doing... Whatever it is you just did."
"Where's the fun in that?" Pinkie replied simply.
As the group ate their lunch, unnatural movement in the tree line caught the attention of a watcher. Said watcher saw that this group was in much more danger than they realise, especially since they were about to encounter the infection.
The leaves of a bush were slowly pushed apart as a large, heavy body slithered through with utter silence and skill of a predator moving on its prey.
"You don't need to be on a beach to bathe in sunlight, darling." Rarity said as she layed on a beach towel, soaking in the sun's rays.
"Amen." Spike whispered to himself before sitting bolt upright and a face of terror.
The group notice and voice their concern, asking if he's okay, to which he replies
"Manticore!"
All seven of them jump to their feet as the hulking beast pounces for the nearest which happens to the white unicorn, Rarity. Spike reacted fast and with an extremely powerful beat of his wings, he rocketed straight in the way to have his shoulder crushed within the the beast's strong jaws.
"Spike!" Rarity screamed,
"Get back!" Spike demanded and Rarity backed away to the the others.
Spike faced the manticore, their faces inches apart before taking a pained breath in and releasing a torrent of green flames right into it's eyes. The manticore reared back with a deafening roar. It forced itself to the ground, knocking Spike down. The beast was readying to the clamp its teeth on the drakes throat. Spike closed his eyes, not noticing the heavy vibrations in the ground below him.
*Thud* *THUD* *THUD*
A huge being swung its enormous arm, hitting the manticore in the side and launching it across the clearing were it collided Into tree trunks.
Spike stared at the being and it stared back. It was a giant stallion... Made of trees!
"Spike! Your shoulder. Are you okay?" Twilight shouted, rushing to his side. She glanced over where the manticore had latched on, only finded scratches.
"I'm fine, my scales are tough." He replied with a wince.
A furious roar resounded through the forest, snapping the attention of everyone present to the manticore as it charged back the beast. It's eyes were glowing a vibrant green, something manticore don't have. The giant readied itself in a stance and went to attack but was caught off guard by the manticore pouncing into it. The beast's claws dug into the being as did its teeth. The being cried out before throwing the beast into the ground with a hard thump. Before the beast could recover, the being raised its right arm as it formed from a hand into a spear. The being thrusted it's spear arm down slicing straight into the body of the manticore. The beast cried and thrashed around as droplets of blood spurted from the soon-to-be fatal wound. The thrashing and crying turned to forced breaths and whimpering as the life left the beast.
The giant whispered in an ancient tongue before ripping it's own arm off, leaving it in the dead manticore.
The group were absolutely shell shocked by what had unfolded infront of them.
The severed arm started moving. It twisted and grew, extending branches from the top and a thick trunk at the bottom. The trunk eventually swollowed the body and the branches grew leaves which bloomed into a beautiful flower as the transformation was completed
The being turned to the group which became ridged from it's gaze.
"Are you... Okay?" It's voice was rough and deep, but also slow and full of wisdom. When recieving no reply, the being spoke again. "Do not be... Afraid... I am..."
"An Ent! A real life ent!" Twilight shouted in joy. This broke the trance of the others and they all looked to the purple alicorn with clueless expressions.
"A what now?" Applejack asked.
"It's an ent. Ancient guardians of myth that are said to be a part of the forests. They watch over all the creature and protect the innocent from any evil that threatens their homes." Twilight explained, only getting more excited. "Wait..." She exclaimed, putting her excitement on pause. "Why did you attack the manticore? If anything you should have attack us for intruding on your forest."
"Don't give him ideas." Dash said as she subtly hid behind Applejack.
"That manticore was no longer under my care... She was infected." The giant said as he glanced at the new tree before returning his gaze.
Fluttershy gasped in realisation, this is what the squirrels meant.
"Yes, miss Fluttershy. I was the one who sent that small family to your door." The giant said.
The group became on edge as the giant spoke Fluttershy's name.
"How... How do you know my name?" Fluttershy asked meekly.
"I know many things." He said mystically.
There was a slight *pop* sound as Twilight wrote out a letter in her magic. The giant watched her as she passed the letter to Spike, which he engulfed in flames. The giant turned and started walking.
"Wait where are you going?" Twilight exclaimed.
"You wish for me to meet your mentor, do you not?" The giant replied
"How did..."
"I suggest we do not keep her waiting, Princess Sparkle."
"How did... What have we found?" Twilight rhetorically asked her friends. Before the seven followed the tree man.
I. Am. Groot!
So what this story bout anyway?
I know this is completely unrelated to the story, but I feel it only appropriate considering it revolves around Ents.
Around the time when the movie came out, my family and I were nuts over Lord of the Rings, and still are to this day. Personally, I consider it the nearly perfect trilogy of movies next to the original Star Wars trilogy and the Dark Knight trilogy.
That's not the point... anyways, when the movie came out, I was still pretty young. And I remember that at the house I lived at, there was this one tree that allowed me to climb to the top of my roof whenever I felt like it. I named it Tree Beard, and every time I would climb it, I would look down at my parents and say I was climbing Tree Beard. It caught on, and that's what we named out tree...
Add 'the' between to and top
Hmm. This has promise. May need to slow down just a tad, but otherwise it will be interesting to see how this goes.
8250944
I’d go with Treebeard myself but he was talking rather fast for him, everything else fits with though.
I'm pretty sure the writer just committed Deus ex Machina by giving Spike wings just to save Rarity... If he had them to begin with there is no reason Twilight would have worried about him being up so high. Other than that I'm enjoying this story.
More please
8250959
Huh. Cool
My big sisters named this one huge rock close to our home "Big Kiss"
No idea which of my big sisters came up with the name
8251746
It may not seem like it, but I pictured Spike with wings before I came up with the idea of him saving Rarity. And the whole Twilight being worried is because she is the more "paranoid" of the group, as it was put in the story, thus creating concern where it would normally be deemed invalid. I'm also quite glad you enjoy the story! And to show how glad I am I have some jokes for you.
If you don't like dark humour, don't read:
-whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sledge hammer, the other is a watermelon!
-Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.
This has potential, just take it slow and steady.
You know, to write 1,5 k words and land on the hotpage... I shall watch you. Nice choice of words and well described all over. As stated somewhen before, take your time, as you roll along.
8251588
Indeed. Will be interesting to see how this one goes. Probably should have it's own genre by now. 'Plant Beings living in the Everfree Forest'. There has been enough stories about them by now lol
"I am on nopony's side, because nopony is on my side, little dragon."
DO IT.
please have a groot refrence please have a groot refrence please have a groot refrence
Psst, found you your cover art!
Right here!
so i guess spike is a few years older, or he managed a brief greed growth without going over board like last time.
8251809
Big kiss? Cute but, why exactly?
8252297
"We're not dragons; we're ponies!"
"Ponies? Never heard of a pony before. Sounds like drake mischief to me."
8252506
I was implying that he was talking to Spike.
8252673
It's another quote from the same scene in LotR mate.
"We're not orcs, we're Hobbits! Halflings! From the Shire!?"
"Hobbits? Hmm... Never heard of Hobbits before. Sounds like Orc mischief to me."
On the story itself:
Needs some pretty heavy polishing but it's not bad.
Two weird things that stood out to me:
Spike saying "Fuck" instead of "Buck" or another softer exclamation. (He is fairly childish in appearance and behavior.)
Spike has wings in this? If he does that's fine, but they should be introduced via a method other than a passing mention during his rescue of Rarity.
Pretty much what I'm thinking is: it jumps straight into the "meat" (the Everfree and the Ent) of the story too quickly. Some characterization, setup, and context prior to the "big moment" via a scene in Ponyville and/or on the way to the pond would help greatly.
Formats errors appears
Please oh please let his name be Treebeard!!!
8253227
that only works if he actually has a "beard"
I feel that, regardless of what ent-mythology has inspired you, fleshing out it's/his/hers dialogue would help a lot with the "ancient and wise" feel it has so far. Also slowing the pace would work wonders but, I personally wouldn't be able to tell you how, as I usually end up with a much too slow pace in what little I write.
As a side note, the grammar isn't spot less but, it's perfectly understandable.
8250944
sideshowtoy.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/902220-product-feature-740x4481.jpg
8252495
I have no idea!
8253273
Good point
Meh. Seems a little rushed. I figured there would be a little more mystery about the ent.
*<>* if this is about some ultimate ring o power ...oh boy
Cool. I loved the Ents from Lord of the Rings. Nice to see them again.
Keep it up!
8252876
I have to agree. I felt as though I was jumping in too fast, but I also felt that because it's pretty much a given that everyone knows the characters except for the ent, so I though "why not just give a swing?"
8253293
I'm surprised at how well I'm doing since I was never any good at English... At all.
Pretty good so far kinda fast on the development thats all i have right now,,
8253492
You're doing far better than par.
The best advice I've heard or given to self editing: listen to your chapters with TTS just before posting them. You'll pick up errors in a flash when you hear them spoken aloud. There are a few extensions or plugins for Chrome and Firefox to do it directly on the page, to make things easier.
So thanks for that.
I find it kind of funny how Spike took a serious injury and Twilight still has him send a letter. Kind of messed up as well but still. Nice job by the way!
so far? too rushed. other wise, OK
Not bad. The pace is a little too fast, but otherwise, it has potential.
I recommend adding something to build up to the confrontation.
Ooooh, this looks interesting! Got me watching.
Also, if you're looking for names for our nice Ent, I vote for Quickbeam.
8292217
Quickbeam? Why Quickbeam?
8301610
Cause your Ent seems rather hasty for a traditional Ent, and in the LotR novels Quickbeam was the name of a hasty Ent.
8301634
Fair enough... But unfortunately I've already got a name for him.
8301681
Ah, okies. i bet it's a good one.
Interesting cant wait for more.
hmmm, rather inTreeguing
8626998
bad
8626998
Boo
8626998
Bad pun lol