If I eat myself, will I disappear or grow twice my size? - Ouroboros
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When Rainbow Dash got Lightning Dust kicked out of the Wonderbolts Academy, she never thought of what Lightning might do afterwards.
Rainbow Dash had crushed the dreams of somepony who couldn't care less about others getting hurt and shrugged off nearly killing five ponies. Didn't she ever think that there may be consequences?
Awesome artwork by Grim_Grin.
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What were Civilians doing at a military training exercise in the first place????
Dark! This is an interesting concept and I like how it's ambiguous enough to not know whether or not Lightning really could do that. I didn't realize the first part was a dream until Luna showed up, but glad it was.
Nicely done!
8252828
It's a kids cartoon. Why question it?
Besides, one of them is royalty, so...
Also, the Wonderbolts are stunt ponies, not military.
8252975
Thanks.
My goal was to make everyone think that it wasn't a dream until Luna showed up and clearly that worked. I think Lightning is capable, but only if she were put in a position/situation that would worsen her mental state... which I am going to put to use in a future story.
8253269
Twilight was still a unicorn. The Wonderbolts are military they seem to be based off the real life blue angels.
8253587
...Oh, yeah. Twilight was still a unicorn at the time...
Well, anyway, I don't see how any of this stuff relates to the story.
Nothing really I just find it kinda strange that the Mane six get free passes on they're behavior even when it causes harm to others, but others like LD get the book after one mistake.
8253269
But i remember an episode saying that the Wonderbolts are technically a military branch. The stunt performances are a side thing in times of peace, comparable to when an air force would use its aircraft for occasional performances.
Interesting concept, though I'm honestly not sure what to make of this version of LD.
What interested me was seeing RD vulnerable, that for all her bravado. That she isn't invincible, but she isn't alone, she has friends and family who will be there to support her in her time of need through thick and thin compared to LD who is a singular average Pegasus mare that RD could kick her ass in a millisecond.
Though the second chapter feels a bit lackluster for the length and abruptness of the ending. I was expecting a little more from the conversation between LD and Luna.
8254806
Really? Huh... Which episode was that?
Well, simply put, this version of Lightning Dust is a monster... or at least has the potential to become one.
As for the second chapter, it was just an epilogue, which is why it was so short. It's just there to show Luna trying to reason with Lightning and teach her a lesson when she proves to be unreasonable.
Anyway, I'm glad you liked how I portrayed RD here and that was certainly what I was going for.
By the way, what did you think of the dream sequence at the beginning? Were you fooled? Or did you pick up on the signs before Luna showed up?
8255195
I saw the comments before reading so i was spoiled.
I think it was the episode in which RD had to learn about the Wonderbolts' history for a quiz or something like that.
8255400
Dangit.
Hmm... I'll have to rewatch that episode.
Well, anyway, what do you think of the cover art Grim made for me?
8255653
I remember the episode irritating me because RD was so ignorant of the Wonderbolts that it was shameful for someone proclaimed to be a Wonderbolts megafan!!!
8255661
Though I understand why you would be irritated by it.
Meh, it seemed pretty in character for Rainbow to not be too deep into the history of the Wonderbolts. After all, Rainbow isn't one to study things to the bone like you and I (and Twilight).
So, um... The cover art?
8255667
Is okay, all things considered.
Though one would think RD would know a thing or two about the individuals of the Wonderbolts like Easy Glider and such.
8255673
Perhaps she forgot? After all, the episode makes it clear that Rainbow learns things in a unique way. That may have something to do with her lack of knowledge: She was trying to learn like everypony else did and it didn't stick.
8255679
That might have some merit.
8255682
The reason I liked the episode (other than the usual reasons) is because I can relate to Rainbow's situation. As someone with Aspergers, I know what's it like to need to be taught differently from other people; having a special way of learning.
8255686
Yeah, it's what the episode is trying to convey to kids and general audiences.
8255690
Oh, on a side note, there's a story I released a long while ago that I would love to get your thoughts on.
8255697
?
8255702
Derpy's Parents Come to Visit. One of my proudest works...... Did I say that right?
8255705
Yeah, i was just asking what story. I'll check it out eventually.
8255749
It's about 4100 words long, just so you know. So, whenever you get the time for something of that length.
And I answered?
...... Oh, it's because I typed the title like this. That's just how I write titles in comments; I wasn't trying to be like 'this story, simpleton!' or anything like that. 
8255762
On a sidenote, have you made any progress on the Diamond Tiara story or the fic of three guys hanging out?
8255774
Once I finally get the next chapter of Saving the Siren written, I'll get to Diamond Tiara's Diary. As for the other one? Well, only time and my strangely wired brain will tell.
8255779
Your strangely wired, single brain.
8255803
That's a crow calling the raven black.
8255873
Caw caw Caw caw, the Politically Correct term would be African American. I'm just teasing since it seems to be a sore spot for you.
8255879
Racial jokes don't bother me as long as they're not done with any malice. In fact, that goes for all jokes. Heck, I few days ago, I joked to Amethyst about coming for his butt (He was fine and played along with it).
Fun fact: I use the phrase 'crow calling the raven black' because it makes more sense than 'pot calling the kettle black'. Ravens and crow are always black, but pots and kettles are sometimes different colors. You feel me?
8255884
I feel you but now i realize you're the Butt Stabber!
You went after Amethyst Dawn, and now...You're gonna shank me!
OHHHHHH MMMMMYYYYY GGGGGGGOOOOODDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!
8255896
Oh, don't worry. I was just gonna rape him, not stab him.
8255903
It's still technically anal penetration.
8255896
Also, I got the Markiplier and possibly Trolls 2 references.
8255908
Depends on where you stab. Could be the cheeks after all.
8255909
Heh so you caught both references!
8255911
Guess it does.
Hehehehe, awesome
I like this story, except the part where Scootaloo was being tortured.
Also, it could be interesting to see a story where Lightning is reformed or something like that.
8300770
To the first part, that was just a dream, you know.
To the second part, there's already tons of fics with Lightning being reformed. This is one of the very few where the opposite happens.
8300800
But, I guess I knew what I was signing up for when I clicked a story with a horror tag.
To your first part: True, it was pretty obvious, but it still was terrible seeing her in such pain.
As to your second comment: Really? I've never seen a fic like that, do you have any recommendations of Lightning reformation stories?
8301200
I get'cha.
And, dude, just look to your right on the similar stories.
8301200
Also, you have to remember who was really being tortured and really was in such pain: Rainbow Dash.
8301893
True.
8301274
Oh, thanks, didn't notice those.
This was different.
Kinda wished there was more. 
Still, not bad for a Dusty fic.
8305245
Different how?
8305249
That is assuming I’m correct about Lighting influencing Rainbow’s dream? I wasn’t sure at first what was going on.
I’ve never read a Dusty fic based off her dreams before. I certainly never expected things to work in the dream realm like you wrote it. It was different from what I’m use to is all. A good different.
8305301
Well, I'm glad you didn't know it was a dream at first. It means the twist worked.
Anyway, if what you're getting at is LD has some dream realm powers, that's not the case. It's just that Rainbow's subconscious suddenly realized that she had made an enemy of a morally bankrupt and potentially dangerous person, causing her to have a dream that displayed the worst case scenario.
8305362
You must let me know if you ever plan to make a sequel. 
Ahhh. That makes sense. Cause Luna made it seem like the dreams were affected by one another. At least that’s how I read it. So Lightning’s dreams compared to Rainbow’s was a coincidence then? That makes more sense. Still loved it.
8305586
There will be a sequel of sorts, but it will actually be a sequel to my other story, The Darkest Hour: Return of Sombra. The sequel will be connected to this story in that it will deal with Rainbow Dash and Lightning Dust.