Letters from an Evil Empress

by zackepic22

I Give the Biggest Brush-Offs

Dear Twilight Sparkle,

First off, I’m not exactly sure how to respond to that ‘friendship lesson’ you gave to me at the end. I think you need to do a bit more studying regarding ‘false’ friends and allies. Such things can’t always be confirmed so quickly…

I also think you need to do a bit more studying on Griffon culture. I know I haven’t sent you very many books on the subject, but, I thought that what you would at least read what I did send. I’m feeling a bit irritated with you to be honest, Twilight. You may be my best student now, but, I still have standards to uphold, and, I expect you to uphold them to the best of your ability.

Although, perhaps it’s not strictly your fault. You might have not felt any reason to read on them up to this point, or, perhaps you’ve only read about ‘Nomad’ griffons, the ones who’ve broken away from mainstream griffon society. Or, maybe you thought she was just another immigrant like Gustave le Grande, who found a way to integrate himself into pony society quite nicely.

Well, you’re mistaken. She’s a citizen of Griffonstone-Though, I use the term ‘citizen’ very loosely, and, I’ll explain why in a future letter-the main capital of Griffonkind. And, much to my surprise, I’ve found out she’s the granddaughter of old Gruff himself!

That old buzzard. I never thought his son would have a chance in Tartarus with a lovely griffon girl, but, clearly, I’ve been proven wrong. He still owes me 50 bits. I knew he was cheating somehow when he showed that talon of aces. Do you know just how astronomically rare it is for someone to get a full hoof of aces? Still, he’s a clever buzzard, and, probably the one griffon I know the best. And, you know why he would never admit to cheating?

Because the griffons of Griffonstone have pride! Theirs’ is a magni stupen It’s a really nice city, okay? Trust me.

Anyway, their own form of bullheaded pride comes with an arrogance almost surpassing even mine, along with a deep set of trust issues. If they won’t let themselves be made foals of by other griffons, they’ll definitely object to a pony doing so. It’s in their nature.

Granted, I still like playing the foal on occasion, but almost everyone’s smart enough to know not to mess with me. And, if they haven’t figured out before then, well- They certainly do right after~

But, griffons will alway see themselves with something to prove. The majority of them are greedy, possessive, and distrusting, and, one doesn’t find the right way of reasoning with them, there’s a high chance you’ll make an enemy for life when you mess with a griffon.

Read up on your griffons, Twilight. You will need it for the future.

Also, I’m thinking of giving Fluttershy that free ticket for the next Iron Will seminar in Ponyville instead. I know one can be all sweet and soft in their own time—though, don’t you dare be getting any ideas about me—but, I think she need tos toughen up a bit. Trust me, Iron Will knows what he’s doing~

Also, keep the pink one under control.

You know not what horrors she might unleash…

It makes even me shudder to think about.

Listen to me more,

Empress Daybreaker

Mmmmm...UGgghhhhh! What is in this stuff?

Sister, did you try to poison me again?

Well, I’ll admit it, it is a very rare one...Unfortunately for you, I’ve been drinking little sips of this type for centuries. I am completely immune by now~

Awwwwww, don’t be upset, you couldn’t have known!

...Tell you what, I’ll help you plot the demise of that noble who tried to have you committed. Sound good?

Yes, you can give his corpse a few good kickings once we’re done.

Comments

[The Bricklayer]

...I don't think Twilight is turning out the way Daybreaker hoped. Good for her.

[redmar]

I get the impression that Twilight has the wrong idea about what Daybreaker expects of her.

[WorldWalker128]

...Tell you what, I’ll help you plot the demise of that noble who tried to have you committed. Sound good?

Yes, you can give his corpse a few good kickings once we’re done.

Lol, Luna Moony wants to beat a dead horse!