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The Man. The Legend. The World's Strongest Writer

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"Life is suffering." - Buddha

Decades after leaving Ponyville, Spike is consort to Dragon Lord Ember, and father to her children. Settled into his role as her diplomat, relations with Equestria have never been better. His life as a proper dragon is going well.
Until one day he receives a letter, a summons he can not refuse.

Written for the Make Spike Suffer contest.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 58 )

Ohh... I think I need a drink, after reading this... Ohh...

Welp, I'm gonna go cry my eyes out....

Welp. I need a stiff drink after that...

This story just showed the true meaning of life you only live once so make the most of it and go to the fullest of your life's potential and never say never

8253603
I don't agree with Y.O.L.O. (You Only Live Once).
You only die once.
You have a chance to live every day.

... did you have to kick my Feels that hard...?

I'll be billing you the tissues I wasted from crying.

Good work there, Mr. Shakespeare.

When 111 years old you reach, look as good, you will not.

...................:applejackunsure:

This is the one thing that doesn't sit right with me. Don't get me wrong, I (of all people) love and appreciate a Star Wars reference, but this doesn't feel like it was done right or well. Having it down to the exact wording makes it stick out to me, imagining Rarity say it, and without some form of further context. It isn't said if Rarity's mental state is a little off, Spike doesn't give a reaction I would expect like saying "I can't believe you remembered that line, we saw that movie so long ago" or something along the same line.

It feels like it was placed in there just for the sake of having a reference.

Other than that, great story.

:fluttercry: I don't think I like this contest.

orig01.deviantart.net/a232/f/2017/155/a/1/crimson_ruby_didit_by_hillbe-dbbkh4f.jpg

At the funeral the love children showed up..' They could understand Raritys secret with the dragon - But the changeling was another thing all together....


:facehoof: nope nope nope nope nope nope. . .Pinkie?

"Life is suffering." - Buddha

Do I even need to read the story?

Oh boy...

8253678 Originally it was more along the lines of, "We'll see how you look at my age," etc etc. The key point sill being that Spike is still really old, but not for a dragon. I considered not making a reference, but then I was like,

#notsorry

Oh come on! No one caught that lion king reference in the opening paragraphs!? Also I think you're missing an 'A' in the paragraph. "Drake walked...

8253746


Nevermind, that's his name. Weird. Knowing who he is before Who he is.

8253749

"Still?" she asked, still facing away.

"Always," he answered, resolutely. She slowly turned back to him.

AH well this looks fun, heh. Can't wait to read it, thanks for submitting it!

The pacing was a tad fast but the concept and execution were on point. The only thing this fic needed was more room to breathe. Give the character's emotions more time to settle.

These feels hurt so good.:raritycry:

8253764 Thank you. It's a story idea that I'd been meaning to write for months. Your contest was a suitable deadline to get it off my to-do list.

5/10
Has potential, but seems rushed and a little clumsy in several places. :twilightsmile:

How It Should Have Ended... (heh heh heh)

Rarity, "Spike, I'm going to become compost..."

Spike, "That sucks. And I'm gonna live, like, an indeterminate amount of time because the show really hasn't said much about my species as yet."

Rarity, "Yes, quite. But, as a final show of my astounding generosity and obsession with you which has become even more of a fanatical devotion that yours to me, I want you to... EAT ME!!"

Spike... O________________________________o

Rarity, "THEN WE SHALL BE TOGETHER FOREVER AFTER YOU DIGEST MY FLESH AND BONES!!"

Spike backs away slowly, then runs for it, chalking the whole thing up to dementia at Rarity's age.

:trollestia:

Boi, good entry. I look forward to judgement day.

Of course, on further inspection, I noticed this:

Beside her, helping her down was Fluttershy. She hadn't aged a day. Discord's meddling, Spike assumed.

I swear, a few years ago there was a story all about that premise. I'm not knocking you or anything, I'm actually just curious if you're familiar with it.

On the other hand, this story is good in premise, but only moderate in execution.

The emotional parts seemed so hamfisted. Like, Spikes confession came out of nowhere and seemed very... weird. I get what you were trying to do, and I love the idea of it, but it was way too in and out. Not to mention, the idea of Rarity confessing on her death bed or something of that nature is something ive seen quite a bit as an idea overall.

This story would've worked better as a drawn out scene in a longer story, I feel. But, as I know, we don't always have the time or interest to do that.

It's very obvious youre a talented writer, far more than me in most areas, i imagine, but I think you could've done a bit better here.

Either way, this was a decent fic and I look forward to the competition judging.

Damn it... you didn't have to do that....

You did not have to make me this sad...

Damn it... that picture at the end killed me...

Well that hit me like a bloody pickup truck..... :applecry:

Not bad, not bad. Could have been cleaned up a bit, but you gave the overall premise of the story nice and clearly.

8253746
Oh no, I picked it up at the first line of dialogue.

Well that was a bit fast, but nice regardless.

8254823
Y-YEA b-but, I was first!!!

Story was Eh... Fluttershy living forever? Twilight living forever? Yet the others just wither away? Spike marrying Ember? I just don't see it. Spike is just so into Rarity and even she has show him the same affection. So I just can't see this happening. And dragons and ponies not having offspring? Hello qilins or kirins? Haven't you see the awesome OC Laveder?
derpicdn.net/img/view/2015/5/22/901466__safe_artist-colon-carnifex_rarity_oc_oc-colon-lavender_alternate+hairstyle_boop_chair_cute_dracony_grabbing_gritted+teeth_gums_hair+bow_hug_hyb.jpeg
Rarity gets that dragon juice inside her and boom! She has the longevity of a dragon in terms of aging.

If you are going to give us the sap man stick to what we love to see you write. And I think you know what sap I'm talking about. :ajsmug:

8255683 I want to expand on Fluttershy's part of this story in a sorta-sequel.
Don't worry. I've still got plenty of... sap to write. I just like to take the occasional break from writing... sap to hear how much people like reading my... sap.

8256490
You monster! How dare you make my feels hurt!



Great story though. Also, that song. Did you make it up or is it from something?

Almost cried.

8257378 Half of it. The other half is canon.

This was amazingly well written and a huge tug on the feels. But personally I hate stories like this. Rarity is not being generous in this. Not by a longshot. Indeed, she has done one of the most selfish things imaginable: she took the choice away from Spike. No matter how you look at it, she decided his present and his future based on what she believed to be best. She did not consult him or anyone else.

Oh I understand why she did it, and I don't fault her reasoning. But she's lying to herself if she thinks that giving up a life with Spike is the "most generous thing [she's] ever done." And I so wish that Spike had called her out on it.

I do want to reiterate that this is nothing against your storytelling abilities. Indeed, to make me feel this strongly shows just how good you are at this. But I had to say something.

8260208 Thank you.

But she's lying to herself if she thinks that giving up a life with Spike is the "most generous thing [she's] ever done." And I so wish that Spike had called her out on it.

Does he not?

"But- but how is that at all generous!? You were the only thing I ever wanted and you kept me from it!"

8262414
I didn't read it that way. I read it as him being upset with the decision she made to be away from him, not the fact that she took any part in the decision away from him. A fine line perhaps, but an important one I think.

Another amazing work from the awe-inspiring Shakespearicles! Honestly, I always hated the "Sparity" ship... but in this light, it's not so horrible. In fact, I loved this story. As if there was ever any doubt~ :trixieshiftright:

It's got great emotion to it, and that is what I'm aspiring to with my story I'm writing... Something that will tug at the heartstrings. Thank you for giving me this amazing read to help me at least a bit!

A great little story. Short, sweet, and very touching.

Sir we have chatted for hours in the author chats, we have pm several times, i have read several of your story's.
but i am going to be 110% honest hear, this is by fare the best story you have ever wrote.
i am going to go get a beer and cry now.

8368673 Thank you. That really means a lot to me.

Eh, only thing I felt was that Rarity was a selfish cunt. As for not having foals together, from what I've heard (least in many game/movie/book-verses), dragons can almost always breed with any species.

The part about Discord and Fluttershy's relationship was utterly horrifying.

"Life is suffering." - Buddha

"Always," he answered, resolutely. She slowly turned back to him.

Spike, have you become Professor Snape?

Sad story, but I'm glad Flutters is still alive cuz of Discord, and that Spike and Ember got together.:fluttercry:

8796535 There will be a FlutterCord sequel to this later this year.

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