Enlisted by famed adventurer Daring Do, Rainbow Dash and Quibble Pants head to the Crystal Empire to find the legendary Chalice of Rhinyorgrun, a mysterious yet powerful dragon artifact. Will they be able to solve the various puzzles that impede their progress? And what is the true secret behind the artifact?
[Some violence, though "Gore" is a stretch.]
Special thanks to my wife 'Cheetoy' for supplying all the artwork!
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Well, you got my attention. Can't wait to see more!
Tracking.
I'm liking this so far
Here are some bits of critique and praise (minor spoilers)
The writing could use some general cleanup, such as using "said" in place of more descriptive terms (descriptive terms are okay when not overused, otherwise dialogue tends to get slowed down.) I also don't know how necessary the second cut to Daring and Ember is, but it's not much of a problem.
I love the character interactions, especially Dash and Quibble's bickering. I also like when Quibble reveals humility. The fact he's helping Daring and Rainbow because he feels he owes them is sweet.
I also dig the visuals of the parchment puzzle, and enjoy the story's overall tone. There is a sense of adventure being built up, and I as a reader can't wait to learn what happens.
My favorite line is:
Forget Caballeron … the publishing companies are the real bad guys in the world!
I'm looking forward to reading more. Keep up the great work!
I was not expecting you to combine my username with the name of Paul Revere's horse. You, sir, just made my life.
I'm liking this. There needs to be more stories with Quibble on this site. You write him pretty well.
I admit I had no intention of reading your "Fluttershy Attends a Rock Concert" story...until now. You managed to sell me on it. Nice work.
I'm gonna need a more detailed explanation of how all of those work >.>
The story is interesting so far. However, the watermarks do get in the way of seeing the pictures clearly.