• Published 3rd Jun 2017
  • 1,633 Views, 89 Comments

Pinkie Asks Rainbow Dash a Weird Question - King of Madness



During a random conversation, Pinkie asks Rainbow an odd question.

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Would You Do It For a Million Dollars?

"And I remember this one time when he dared me to hop the fence into Mr. Houndkeeper's yard, which had, like, a hundred dogs in it." Rainbow Dash told her friends. "And half of them were out for human blood, if you know what I mean."

"Did you actually do it?" Sunset asked in disbelief.

"I'll admit, I was gonna back out on that one. I'm daring, not stupid. But he said he would give me ten dollars if I did it." Rainbow held up her hands. "I know that doesn't seem like much, but I was ten. Ten dollars might as well have been fifty!"

"So, you did it?"

"What kept them dogs from eatin' ya hide?" Applejack asked.

Rainbow smirked at Fluttershy, who sat beside her. "Well, let's just say, I had an animal expert to help me out." She said as she lightly punched Fluttershy on the shoulder.

Fluttershy smiled shyly. "They really weren't that vicious. They were actually really nice."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Only to you. If I had tried to talk to them, they would've eaten my butt before I could've said three words!"

"What about the rest of you?" Pinkie asked.

Rainbow gave Pinkie a dry look and pursed her lips. "...They would have saved it for later." She deadpanned.

Applejack laughed. "Hehe! Ya know, this talk'a dares reminds me of somethin' Granny Smith told me.

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Is it another 'looong story about life on the prairie'?" She asked with her best Granny Smith impression.

Applejack gave her a bemused look. "Will someone slap her for me?"

Pinkie took the offer and smacked Rainbow upside the head.

"Thank ya. As I was sayin', Granny told me about one of 'er friends back when she was my age. He was a dude named Dusty Brown and he had a reputation for takin' any dare he was dared to do. From wrestlin' an alligator to drinkin' fifty mugs'a cider in fifty minutes to racin' through a field littered with bear traps, he did it all!"

The other girls were quite impressed at the sound of this.

"Why, he sounds absolutely fearless." Rarity mused.

"I hope he didn't hurt the alligator or vice versa." Fluttershy said with concern.

"Wow, that guy sounds about as awesome as me." Rainbow complimented.

"Fifty mugs in less than an hour?" Twilight adjusted her glasses as she thought to herself. "How did his liver survive?" She muttered.

"Did he really take every dare?" Sunset asked.

"Well, there was one dare he wouldn' take." Applejack admitted.

"What was it?! What was it?!" Pinkie asked as she bounced in her seat.

Applejack suppressed a laugh. "Heh, it's a funny story. See, one'a his friends dared him to kiss his other friend on the lips in front of the entire school. Dusty could handle fightin' alligators and steppin' on bear traps, but wasn' about to kiss no guy in front of a crowd." Applejack paused to think. "...Though, he did tell Granny Smith that if they had offered him a million dollars, he would'a done it right then and there without hesitation."

Pinkie thought for a moment when an idea popped in her head. "Hey, Rainbow Dash, would you kiss Fluttershy for a million dollars?!"

Rainbow spat out her soda, drenching Rarity in the process.

"Hey! Watch where you're spitting!" Rarity scolded before looking down at her stained outfit. "Eww."

Fluttershy blushed and slid down in her seat, trying to hide herself behind her hair.

"And it couldn't be a quick peck on the lips either." Pinkie continued. "It would have to be a passion-filled tongue fight and it would have to be where people could see you!"

The others looked from Pinkie to Rainbow.

Rainbow opened her mouth... then closed it... then opened it... then closed it as she thought about the proposal.

"Rainbow Dash!" Fluttershy's blushed got redder.

"What?! I mean, yeah, it would be gross and embarrassing, but... A million dollars?!" Rainbow defended. "Y-You gotta think about that. If it was, like, a hundred dollars, I would be like, 'No. I ain't about to french my best friend in front of the whole school for a hundred dollars! I'll just get a job to earn that money. There's certain stuff I won't do.' But for a million?!"

Fluttershy's blush faded a bit as she thought it over. Rainbow did have a point. A million dollars was a lot of money and there was so much one could do with that kind of money. "It is a lot." She admitted.

"But then again," Rainbow continued. "That would be really bad for our reputations. I already have enough people that think I'm gay without giving them 'evidence'. And I would never live that down!" Rainbow started realizing what the consequences of the act would be and it was horrifying. "I would never be able to recover from that!" She continued thinking. On one hand, there would be so much awesome stuff she would be able to do with a million dollars. On the other hand, her precious reputation would sustain eternal damage. Finally, she looked to her friends for help. "What do you guys think?"

Sunset shrugged. "Well, what would you care about more? The money or your reputation?"

Twilight tapped her chin. "Well, either could compensate for the other, so..."

"I say go for the money, Dashie!" Pinkie cheered. "So, what if you have to make out with your best friend to get it. Who cares?"

"That's easy for you to say, Pinkie." Rainbow deadpanned. "I don't think you even have a sense of shame."

Pinkie opened her mouth to reply, but then thought about it. "...Good point."

"Well, I, for one, do not think that money would be worth the humiliation, even if it is a million." Rarity answered as she tried in vain to clean herself. "After all, money is only there for a while. A reputation is forever.

"Ah disagree." Applejack retorted. "Ya gotta do what ya gotta do. People will get over it eventually."

Rainbow looked to Fluttershy, who simply shrugged. Not having an answer, Rainbow decided to just brush it off. "Eh, it doesn't matter. I mean, who would offer me a million dollars to kiss Fluttershy anyway?"

"You'd be surprised." Pinkie answered.

"Whatever." Ignoring her oddball friend, Rainbow went to change the subject. "Hey, did you guys hear about the Daring Do movie coming out?"

Soon, the question faded from their minds; never to be addressed again.

Author's Note:

Well, what can I say? I was watching Blastphamoushd on Youtube and one of the things he said entered my mind while I was thinking about Equestria Girls. Then this happened... But I enjoyed writing it and I've decided to make this a series. A series of one-shots with the Human 7 having weird, random discussions.

This should be fun. :pinkiecrazy:

Also, what would you do? Would you passionately make-out with your best friend in front of a bunch of people for a million dollars? And I mean best friend as in 'like a sibling' not 'my gf/bf is my best friend' or 'I got married to my best friend' or stuff like that. (Apparently, I have to make that clear)

Comments ( 89 )

Cute story;)

I would passionately make out with my best friend for free:rainbowlaugh:

8206926 Glad you liked it. Though, if so, would you mind hitting the thumbs up button? I've notice that people tend to forget to do that.

I would passionately make out with my best friend for free:rainbowlaugh:

...That's unsettling. :twilightoops:

Considering I married my best friend, yeah. :rainbowlaugh:

You've got a couple of typos at the beginning:

"Did you actually do it?" Sunset asked in disbelieve.

"I'll admit, i was gonna back out on that one.

Other than that, nicely put together. I enjoy these slice-of-life inane what-if conversations, and you captured the personalities well. Looking forward to more of your series!

8206940 I meant, a best friend as in 'like a sibling'. Not best friend as in 'could end up as a couple'.

Anyway, glad you enjoyed it. I'll take care of those spelling errors. :twilightsmile:

8206936
Ahhh, you're right. Sorry. I just did it. ;)

Meh. My best friend would probably kiss back. Or, slap me really hard and then laugh.

XD This was great! I wanna see more of these stories! More ridiculous antics and discussions!

8207022 Glad you liked it. :twilightsmile: And, luckily, stories like this are easy for me to write. So, all I need is something for them to discuss, which isn't hard. So, expect them to be popping out soon. :pinkiehappy:

8207030 Here's a discussion topic for them: Favorite shows as kids like Power Rangers or cartoons

8207040 I'll make that the next one. Just for you. :raritywink:

They should revise the question like: Would you have raw sex for a Centillion dollars?

Boy, if I had a nickel for every time I've had this out-of-nowhere type of conversation, I wouldn't need to take that bet.

Would you passionately make-out with your best friend for a million dollars?

Uuhhhhhhh... *clears throat* oh boy...

8207287 This is a family-friendly kingdom, brother. I want my content to be as Rated E as possible.


8207488 It would have to be in front of people too. :ajsmug:

Also, what would you do? Would you passionately make-out with your best friend in front of a bunch of people for a million dollars?

sure i just need to find me a girlfriend now [cuz if your gf aint your best friend your dating wrong]

Shit son, my best friend is my girlfriend

8207786 True... But I meant best friend as in 'like a sibling'.

8207849 I meant... You know what, I'll just edit my author's note.

Also, what would you do? Would you passionately make-out with your best friend in front of a bunch of people for a million dollars? And I mean best friend as in 'like a sibling' not 'my gf/bf is my best friend' or 'I got married to my best friend' or stuff like that. (Apparently, I have to make that clear)

Hopefully, now the question is clear to everyone.

8207761
Idunnomaybeifshedoesntmindwhitelightdontkillmebutimightdoitforahundredidontknow!? :raritydespair:

8208137 Her name is Whitelight? Well, it's for a million dollars, so I'm sure she'll understand. She may ask for half of it, but she'll understand. :raritywink:

8208208 You know what the best part is? This is only the first of a long line of 'strange discussions with the Equestria Girls' stories! You'll soon be asking yourself more strange and awkward questions then you can believe! :pinkiehappy::pinkiecrazy:

8208249
I... look forward to it? :rainbowlaugh:

8207852
i your friends like that then you just tell em about the money and do it anyway they will understand

I already have enough people that think I'm gay without giving them 'evidence'.

Hmm that is true, there's no particular reason in my mind to characterize RD as homosexual aside from the outlandish pick that her rainbow colors could represent the LGBT flag. :applejackunsure:

8208758 There's also her very tomboyish personality. In fact, that's why the whole 'Rainbow Dash is gay' thing really bothers me; it feels like stereotyping. :ajbemused:

8209134 I've never viewed Tomboys as automatic lesbians, but i guess that's how our society works in it's mindset?

8209145 Exactly! It's so stupid and it really bothers me.

8209196 Hmm i wonder if this implies there's still discrimination in modern society, albeit in a different way than the traditional definition.

8209202 Unfortunately, my friend, there always has been and always will be discrimination in whatever form. :ajsleepy:

...But lets not mop about that. Let's focus on more positive stuff, like... What would you do (Regarding the question in the author's note)?

8209241 I'd rather preserve whatever dignity i have left on me so no, i wouldn't make out with my BF.

In fact, I'm not even sure i have one? :applejackunsure:

8209246 Dignity? I assume that means you would go for the million? :ajsmug:

8209250 Take the million either through force or subterfuge but not going with the dare.

8209253 I guess it's just not worth it to you, is it?

8209255 Honestly, not really.

8209260 I really don't know what I would do. I mean... Actually, I don't think I have a best friend. I have a few friends, but I can't say any of them are my 'best' friend... But if I did, making-out with them in front of a bunch of people... I can't see myself ever doing that, but for a million dollars... I really don't know what I would do. :twilightoops:

8209263 I have no BFs either.

8209272 Sorry to hear that.

...You know, now that I think about it, I wouldn't be able to go through with it even if I wanted. So, I wouldn't take the dare.

8209275 Though what'll be the next topic of these conversation one-shots?

8209282 I'm taking suggestions. :twilightsmile: The next one, as requested by Arcana down below, will be them discussing their favorite childhood TV shows.

Have any suggestions? As long as the suggestion doesn't conflict with the E Rating and my 'No Ships' rule, I will do it. I Pinkie Promise! :pinkiehappy::pinkiecrazy:

8209289 Hmm maybe Superheroes?

Ohh maybe a childish, over the top Batman vs. Superman debate?(Team Superman!)

8209298 You got it! Any others?

P.S. TEAM BATMAN, SUCKA!

8209303 Well maybe the debate could be between RD(Pro-Superman because Superman is f**king awesome!!!) and either Pinkie or Sci-Twi(because it's in character for Pinkie to be immature or Sci-Twi cuz she is a NERD!!!)

8209309 I feel that was directed at me. :ajbemused:

Comment posted by Temnizziv deleted Jun 4th, 2017

8209311 Kinda but also because Batman is all about tech, science, and mystery so i feel like Sci-Twi would be inclined towards that. :pinkiesmile::ajsmug:

8209318 Yeah, well, let's just agree that Batman and Superman are both awesome in different ways. Let's leave the childish potshots to Rainbow and Twilight, shall we? :ajbemused:

Yes, I'm mad.

8209327 Yeah, I'm just joking with the potshots and i do like Batman as well.

8209329 If you're just joking around, then would you kindly put a :trollestia: in the comment so that I know your joking? It's commom courtesy here in the Kingdom of Madness.

Also, I apologize if I seem a bit too offended. I'm still recovering from dealing with the incident with JadeSaber, so I'm a bit tender for now. :twilightsheepish:

8209339 I simply forgot. :ajsleepy:

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