The Truth About Girls (Vol. 2)

by TheMareWhoSaysNi

Rainbow's Blues (part 1)

She scratched the arm of the velvety chair, unsure of where she should start. To be here again after so many years felt almost unreal. If she’d been told she’d come back off her own initiative, Rainbow Dash wouldn’t have believed it. Yet, she knew, she wasn’t there for no good reason. She needed it.

It was hard to accept.

In front of her silence, Dr. Horse felt she would need a little help in order to start the conversation. It wasn’t easy to be back in therapy after she did without anything for so long.

“How do you feel?”

She looked up from the chair, her eyes on him furtively before she sighed, and started to stare at the carpeting instead. Back then, there was no carpeting but a wooden floor, she remembered…

“I’m not feeling very well. I mean… not quite comfortable.”

“On the phone, you’ve said you wanted to talk about what happened to you this weekend. It was your mother’s death anniversary, wasn’t it?”

“It was”, she sighed again. “Last Saturday.”

“Fine. Then, tell me about Saturday.”

Once again, it was a bit complicated for her to know where to start… There was so much to say about this unordinary day.

Like every year, when she had woken up, she had felt heavy, with the deep desire to go back into bed and to spend the whole day crying under her blankets.

But like every year, she had chosen the second option which always bloomed in her brain after the first one. And which wasn’t any better, in fact.

Yes, she probably would have to start here.

----------------------------------------

They were holding hands, in each other’s arms. Rainbow Dash displayed the delighted smile of great excitement, but Fluttershy was shaking from head to toes. It was an experience she never thought to be going through one day.

“Are you ready?” the multicolored-haired teenage girl asked.

“I’m not.”

“Come on, don’t be such a sissy. All you have to do is dare. Close your eyes, sometimes it helps. I’m counting to three and we do it at three, alright.”

“Not alright.”

If she listened to her, she would never answer any other way, and they would never dare. When known how much the activity for both costed, it would be a great waste. Rainbow Dash forcedly dragged her friend with her, and jumped. Fluttershy had no other choice than to follow.

If one of them kept her eyes closed as recommended, the tightest she could, the other one kept them opened wide. She wanted to see everything, to feel everything – the danger, the sensation of being about to break her neck, and the pleasure launching after the rise of adrenalin.

The high-pitch shriek Fluttershy let out all along the plunge had nothing in common with Rainbow Dash’s, rounder and more enthusiastic. Even when their fall was stopped by the bungee cord, she didn’t shut it up. She needed a few more comes and goes, less violent than the first ones, so they finally both stabilized and so that the voice of one of them stopped to resound in the valley.

A supervisor came to look after them, in order to get them off the necessary equipment. When he was busy taking off her harness and the rest, she was able to see how bad Fluttershy’s state was, worse than on the roller-coaster at the latest fun fair. She wouldn’t be surprise to see her throwing her breakfast up in the grass… if she had one.

To be honest, the young woman wasn’t Rainbow Dash’s first choice to be her companion in bungee jump. Soarin, Rarity and Sunset Shimmer were working, Applejack had a practice session, Twilight was devoting herself into the writing of a thesis, and Pinkie Pie was helping the Cakes with a big order for a wedding. She was the only one free, so through spite, she had begged her to be her partner to try this new thing.

It was some sort of an unsettling experience. The goal of this was to test her limits, to prove herself she was alive by flirting with death. Yet, what was supposed to help her focus on something else had many similarities with the accident she was trying so hard to get out of her mind. Despite it all, she had liked it. Enjoyed it, even.

To the extent that she tried to convince Fluttershy to climb back for another jump. The second time, and now she knew what to expect, it would be different. A bit less double-edged, she thought.

But it happened to be impossible to know whether or not this would be true. Her friend was pale, complaining about her head spinning, and being on the verge of apoplexy. She even was crying. It seemed clear there was no way she would climb back up, no matter how much money her friend had paid for it.

It already was huge, as impressionable as she was, that she had agreed to come in here, and that she’d been able to make her jump the first time. Insisting would be taking too much advantages of her limitless kindness.

And so, she didn’t insist. At least, she could say she’d done it. What a pity it left her a bit dissatisfied. This awful day was still young, and she would have to find something else to do in order to fill it. She didn’t even want to envision the other option. Surely because it was too safe, too comfortable…

------------------------------------------

The phone rang, cutting Rainbow Dash short in the middle of her sentence. She looked at Dr. Horse making a sign with his hand and picking up. The person at the end of the line might be saying something really important since the psychiatrist didn’t open his mouth before at least one minute.

“Fine… Give her ten milligram of Tercian, it’s enough.”

Then he hung up, focusing back on the young woman in front of him, nervously playing with the rims of her skirt. The first time he saw her facing him in this same office, she had one side of her head shaved, a distant look, messy hair and her face was covered with bruises and scratches.

Now she was starting at his bobble loafers, as if the simple fact of looking into his eyes would mean nothing had happened between her first day here and now. As if she hadn’t changed, hadn’t grown up. Hadn’t learned anything.

“Still with Tercian, uh?” she whispered, almost for herself.

“Yes. It remains the most effective remedy in some of the cases…”

Silence. Brief memories went through her mind. Screams. Fright. Darkness. More screams. She shook her head, in order to focus back on the present days, and finally rose her eyes to meet Dr. Horse’s.

“Probably.”

“You were saying you were feeling bad to have force your friend Fluttershy…”

“Ah, yes. That’s what I was saying, yeah.”

The young pink-haired woman barely had talked to her since they were back from bungee jump. Even far from the place, she kept on shaking, and had refused Rainbow Dash to give her any kind of comfort.

A bit earlier in the morning, she’d confessed him she had a date with Big Macintosh, for a romantic day together. They would only take a walk, a few pictures on the way, and then eat something. Although it was nothing unordinary, there were no need to explain that this little something pleased Fluttershy, who was feeling happy just by spending a few minutes by her boyfriend’s side.

Because she didn’t want to be alone today, Rainbow Dash went with her to meet the boy. Like most of the time, he was accompanied by Zephyr, Fluttershy’s brother, who had decided it was his duty to give his blessing to each of their date together. In fact, this detail always outraged Rainbow Dash. His sister was old enough to know what to do. She didn’t need a chaperon as if she was some kind of retarded.

As soon as they arrived, Fluttershy flew into Big Macintosh’s arms, as if she had been the victim of the most violent of aggression. Alright, she never really been the brave type, but all the same… What was the use of acting such as a big baby?! Did she really want her moron of big brother to keep on treating her the way he did? And, she made her appear as the bad one.

“What have ya done to her?” Big Macintosh questioned, unsure of how he could get comfort to his girlfriend.

“Say what! Only bungee jump. Please, she’s not dead!”

“I’m not but I could have been!” Fluttershy whined, looking up, on the verge of tears, at her boyfriend.

“Ya know she’s easily scared. Why didn’t ya ask to somebody else?”

“Like me”, Zephyr intervened.

“Like not even in your wildest of wildest dreams, you dimwitted!”

The worse of this all was that Rainbow Dash realized how odious she was behaving with everyone. She wanted to talk to them in a very different way, but she just couldn’t. She couldn’t help it… They had a way of making her go on pins and needles. All of them were acting as if everything was for the best in the best of all possible worlds.

Couldn’t they see how life was a disgusting thing?

She was lucky they weren’t too annoying, and most importantly, that they knew she had mitigating circumstances. Not answering her provocations, Big Macintosh, still holding Fluttershy in his arms, offered her to come and share an ice-cream with them.

It was a very kind offer, but too little compatible with what she felt like doing. To tell the truth, since months, she had something in mind, and she was thinking that today was the perfect day to get this idea on track.

“Don’t you rather want to go and get a tattoo with me? Sunset Shimmer told me if we wanted one, she would make a special price for us!”

“It’s nice of you but I had enough strong sensations for today… or even for the whole year”, Fluttershy whispered.

“Come on, please… No need to make something huge, just a small one would do.”

“A tattoo must mean something to ya or it means ya don’t really need it.”

“You’re nothing but a bunch of chickens! I’ll go on my own, too bad for you”, Rainbow Dash finished, shrugging.

Once again, the fact she was talking to them this way hurt her heart deeply, and yet, she was unable to display a single hint of benevolence. Each time they opened their mouths and said something, she felt as if her friends had all been watered down into glucose syrup.

She turned her back on them and decided she was better off alone, since things were this way. The couple’s voices resounded behind her, telling her goodbye, and she answered with a wave, not turning around.

A few seconds later, she saw Zephyr walking by her side, a wide smile upon his juvenile and stubbly face.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

Yes, being on her own was going to be difficult, however she wasn’t yet so desperate she needed company at any cost, especially when it was such an unbearable one.

“You’re right, they’re a couple of chickens… I’m going to get a tattoo with you.”

“Like, for real?”

“I swear!”

This scenario changed the rules. To get a tattoo was a fancy, a sudden and reckless desire. For all that, she had her head screwed on right. If Zephyr got tattooed with her, she would have a witness to tell everyone how brave she’d been, and how stoical she’d remained once in front of the needle.

As a little girl, her mother congratulated her or bought her a lollipop each time she didn’t screamed nor cried during her vaccines and the application of disinfectant on her many boo-boos.

Don’t think about it, don’t think about it, don’t think about it, she repeated to herself.

“Well, then, follow me. But I’m warning you, if I catch you boohooing, it’s seriously going to piss me off.”

“I won’t boohoo. Come on, I’m a man.”

“Stupid remark…”

Despite this cutting comment, the young man stayed by her side, never losing his smile. One needed to see the pride with which he was strutting in the streets of Canterlot, just because he was alone with her. Unceasingly, she rolled her eyes and gave him single-syllable answers each time he asked her a question, yet he remained in the sunniest of moods.

They arrived in front of the tattoo workshop when his cheery face vanished away all of a sudden. Behind the window, one of the employees showed a patron what the various needles she was using looked like. Zephyr froze, and turned paler than a corpse.

She heard him swallowing, and as she was pushing the door open, Rainbow Dash saw the young man wasn’t following.

“Get your ass off! It takes very long and I don’t have all day!”

“Well… All things considered, I’m staying here and I’ll wait for you to be done, alright? I don’t think I want to get a tattoo after all…”

“Sheesh, don’t wait for me and go back home. I don’t want to be seen with such a wimp!”

Usually, such a comment from her would have been enough to make him change his mind. Not today. Today, he didn’t need to be asked twice to turn back and flee as fast as he could, far from mean, mean needles.

Rainbow Dash shrugged and stepped into the workshop. She would never have bear him for so long, anyway. This guy had a gift to make her mad when she was feeling good, so there was no need to insist on this very special kind of Saturday…

The bell announcing a new costumer resounded above her head. Immediately, Sunset Shimmer, who was at the reception desk, looked up from her magazine and smiled happily at her. She had tied her red and yellow hair in a ponytail, and was wearing a white tee-shirt with a mustard yellow jacket, along with black jeans torn all along her legs which appeared when she leaned against the counter in order to wave her friend.

“Are you alone?” she asked, pleased to have a familiar face at her working place.

“Yeah, I see Pinkie Pie tonight but for now, everybody let me down.”

“Not cool… Are you here for me or did you make up your mind for a tattoo?”

“Option number two.”

“Awesome! Do you know what kind of tattoo you want?”

“Well, not really… I thought about the cloud and thunderbolt, you know… Like my necklace and my bracelet”, she said, shaking her wrist.

“Let me see…”

Sunset Shimmer looked closely at her item, then grabbed a pencil and a notebook that were near her on the counter. With a few lines, she was able to make a sketch looking exactly like the item on her bracelet. She showed her friend the result.

“Like this?”

“Perfect! You’re gifted in drawing.”

“No, it’s nothing at all. Well… Let’s see when it’s going to be possible…”

After she pushed away her notebook, she grabbed another one under the counter, and turned the page at full throttle.

It took Rainbow Dash a few seconds to understand what her friend meant. Before she got any farther, she grabbed her wrist, and plunged a firm look into her blue eyes.

“Are you saying you can’t do this right now?”

“Well… I am. I thought you knew. Our book is full at least until next week. Maybe I’ll find one hour and a half for you Saturday a week on.”

“I don’t want to do it Saturday a week on. I want to do it now.”

“I’m sorry, it’s impossible. No artist is free, we’re overbooked, and as I’m still minor I’m forbidden to tattoo someone unless there’s an adult to supervise me.”

“We could find an arrangement. Don’t need to tell your boss.”

“It’s impossible, Rainbow Dash. I have to be at the reception desk. If I tattoo you and anything bad happen, it would be the workshop’s responsibility.”

“You know what? Forget it!”

After this, she grabbed Sunset Shimmer’s sketches notebook, torn off the drawing her friend had done, rolling it into a ball that she threw in her direction.

“Don’t take it personally, Dash.”

“How do you want me to take it? I thought we were friends. Can’t you even do it for your friend?”

“Precisely. You’re my friend, so I don’t want to take such a risk. Listen… I know today isn’t an easy day for you, but…”

“Shut up. Don’t say another word.”

Above all, never evoking what this day meant to her. If she said so much as the words “your mother”, she could scream of frustration. It was the day when no one could address this topic. She was feeling as if people were trying to stab her whole body with daggers.

“Rainbow Dash…”

“Stop! You don’t want to do this? Fine. Don’t do this. But don’t ever speak to me again.”

Why had she said something like this? Sunset Shimmer was a precious friend, always ready to defend her. Just because she was refusing to give in to one of her whims, and for good reasons, she had thrown this at her face. It was unfair, and she was aware of this.

Nevertheless, instead of apologizing like she was dying to, she turned around and left the tattoo workshop in a hurry, even bumping into a female costumer stepping into the boutique.

If she apologized, she knew what was going to happen… Sunset Shimmer would want to talk about her mother. And she refused to do that. It was better this way, and too bad if she was mad at her. She deserved it, anyway.

------------------------------------

Her story could have stopped here. She could have go back home and get satisfied with her first option in the dead silence and emptiness of her house. Yes, if she hadn’t been able to convince Pinkie Pie to go to this club, things could have stayed this way.

“This friend… Pinkie Pie? You didn’t know her four years ago…”

“That’s right.”

“So, does she know about your mother?”

“She does. All my friends know, even Sunset Shimmer and Fluttershy.”

“It means you’re able to talk about it.”

“I don’t know if that’s the right word to say. I’m always staying on the surface of things.”

It probably was one of her biggest issues. The fact she refused to speak about this topic openheartedly, even with the persons that were the dearest in her heart. Soarin hadn’t even been told about what she’d been through before this gloomy night… It allowed her to keep on pretending, as if nothing had happened. As if at night, when she got home, she wasn’t in front of absence and empty space. As if her nightmares were completely over.

“Your friend Pinkie Pie was with you for the night, am I right?”

She nodded, aware that he was expecting more. And also aware that what was left to tell wasn’t glorious either.

“Was everything alright?”

“You can’t say that. It was… worse than the rest!”

After leaving Sunset Shimmer in this very little friendly way, she went to the Silk Road’s giant luxury mall, where she would never go usually. People running errands here were of the same social rank than her, yet she wasn’t feeling like one of them.

It was the kind of persons her father would have liked her to meddle with. Those who were on the magazines, designed as the future of the country, fashionista princesses, and high finance wolves in the making. Everything she could never be, even by forcing her own nature.

There were glances at her, all along her stroll, or rather her buying frenzy, but Rainbow Dash didn’t mind. She bought a very sexy new dress, black, with a lowcut at the back and sophisticated high heel pumps that Rarity wouldn’t have denied, but that she wouldn’t ever wear again. Then, though she hated to stay inactive for hours while someone was fingering her skin, she went to a spa and even asked for a professional makeup.

Thus painted, she met Pinkie Pie at the opposite side of the city. The area they went to, to be honest, had a very bad reputation. It even was its major feature. Still with this sensation of flirting with danger…

Her friend couldn’t resist the invitation. Any occasions to party – what Rainbow Dash promised her – were good to take. That the place was famous for not being really welcoming past midnight didn’t really matter. She’d been part of a gang, after all. She could defend herself. All she’d have to do would be to tell her former leader’s name. At least, it was what she said to her friend when she agreed to come with her.

They both made a big impression when they stepped into the club they’d chosen. There were very few girls of their social world around here, though Pinkie Pie wasn’t really from the same class than Rainbow Dash. It didn’t matter neither. They were not there to flirt, but to dance the night away.

It all started really good. Rainbow Dash led her friend on the dancing floor from the very beginning, and both spent one hour laughing and moving their hips at the sound of dubstep which they were keen of around here, without anything particular to happen.

That was when they went to the bar in order to get some drinks that things started to get out of hands. They had just ordered a round of tequila shots when a stranger offered to pay for their next drink. They both knew the men and boys going in that club weren’t the desirable kind, so Pinkie Pie politely refused.

But Rainbow Dash said yes, unsure of why she did. Of course, the stranger in question, dressed with leather pants and a grey tee-shirt with the name of a metal band printed on it, wanted to keep them company. The way he was hitting on the young woman lacked subtlety and she couldn’t help but laughing at him. How lucky that he thought she was laughing at his jokes…

Probably because he thought the fact she accepted a drink and she let him talk to her had another meaning. Indeed, when they went back on the dancefloor, the man followed them.

They hoped they would lose him among the crowd, but he was stubborn and tenacious, and able to find them. From then on, determined to get what he thought she owed him, he stuck to Rainbow Dash, trying to grab her hips, to take her hands, if not to kiss her… She rejected him from the very start, but the more his advances were insistent; the more aggressive she became.

“Piss off, you asshole! Stop sticking to me like glue with her calloused hands and your rotten breath!” she finally yelled at him.

It hadn’t fallen on deaf ears. The man, tipsy, lost his kind of lecherous smile, and his face became as hard as reinforced concrete. He grabbed Rainbow Dash’s wrist and shook her with all his might.

“Who the hell do you think you are, you little slut! Who allowed you to call me an asshole?”

“I’m calling you whatever I want!” she laughed in his face.

“I’m going to beat the f*ck out of you, you slut!”

It was at this moment that the man was punched in the nose by someone else.

Feeling it coming, Pinkie Pie also grabbed her friend by the wrist, and begged her to follow her outside. They had to run away. These guys weren’t joking. They weren’t Sunset Shimmer’s former friends, nor Trixie, Lightning Dust or even Mr. Caballeron. They were real criminals. What they were able to do was at the front page of newspapers.

But the man who had hit on her hadn’t come alone. He had a whole bunch of friends with him, all as suspicious-looking as him, and they tried to block the way.

“We’re not done with you, the little prick-teasers. If you follow us without scandals, we’ll only rape you.”

Right then, both thought this would be their final hour. What saved them was that the other guy was in trouble in his fight with their invisible benefactor. He needed backup to help him getting rid of him… or her. It drew the club’s bouncers’ attention, who ran to the place of the action, armed with stun guns.

If they were intercepted by security, they would call the police. What would happen next couldn’t be more logical. They were minors and were forbidden to be here. Their parents would be warned, they would spend the night in a drunk tank for teens, and would have to pay an expensive fine.

This time, they had no other choice than running away.

They ran breathlessly, in a straight line, after escaping by the fire issue, to make sure no one would catch them. They ran until they were far enough from the club not to fear anything. Though they were athletes, they felt as if they’d run after smoking a whole pack of cigarettes.

Hands on their knees, each had to wait to catch their breath before being able to speak. Once the adrenalin down, there was something feverish in the air. At least, that was what Rainbow Dash was feeling.

“Phew! That was close! Fun, wasn’t it?”

“Fun?!” Pinkie Pie yelled. “Fun? We could have croaked!”

Rainbow Dash’s smile fell back. In the half-dark, in front of her, her friend had red cheeks, and temples were beating in an irregular way. Frowning, her usual smile had deserted her.

And she knew. She knew this time; she had gone too far. For good. Fluttershy, Sunset Shimmer… It was nothing in comparison. Everything she had put her other friends through on the same day in the past, it was nothing either.

Pinkie Pie was angry, and yelling at her, what she thought to be almost impossible, as rare as an avalanche in the middle of a desert.

“But…”, she tried to argue.

“There’s not ‘but’!”, Pinkie Pie cut her short. “Those guys were criminals! They threatened to rape us and it’s nothing fun. Who can tell whether they wouldn’t have stabbed us and left us in a gutter or who knows what else?”

Everything her friend said was true, and because she knew it was true, and she was fully aware of what they’d just risked, she was feeling horrible. Even trying hard, she couldn’t help but shake, from head to toes and even her whole face. Tears were coming up soon…

It probably was the reason why Pinkie Pie’s tone went less on the reproach mode. For all that, she didn’t go soft on her. There were things she needed to hear, and too bad if she didn’t like them.

“I know you’re suffering and this is a very hard day for you. You wish you were able to forget everything… But that’s not the way you’re going to feel any better and face the truth. Wake up! It’s as self-destructive as swallowing pills, and it won’t fix up anything. It never will! This day is going to come back every year and you’ll have to deal with it!”

This time, tears were here. They were soaking her cheeks, making everything which had stayed stable until then shake.

Pinkie Pie was right. The only problem was that Rainbow Dash didn’t feel ready to deal with all this tonight. It probably was the best moment for her to, yet each of the words sounded unbearable to her. Just like the rest.

She stepped back, staring at her friend who seemed to have understand what would happen next. Arms stretched out, she made a step forward, but Rainbow Dash stepped back again, and when her foot met a garbage can which had been pushed down the ground, she turned around and ran away once more.

Pinkie Pie’s voice calling her resounded behind her, but she stopped running only once sure she was even more lost. Most importantly, until she was certain she couldn’t be caught back.

So, she let herself fall along a wall and let her pain burst out. Tears she had shed the last time she spoke to her father were nothing in comparison. It was as intense as it had been on the day she realized her mother was dead and gone forever, many days after her funerals, when she woke up from her sideration state.

Something became clear in her mind at this right moment – she would never be really healed. She had thought so, but it was impossible. Her mourn hadn’t been done the right way, and here she was, hurting herself and hurting the ones she loved, as if she was trying to make them feel as bad as she.

Supposing that they would ever speak to her again…

Author's Note:

This new chapter excpetionnally gets published today, because tomorrow night, my BFF and I are having a GoT marathon!

Comments

[MidnightShy21]

I loved it! I hope you'll have fun with your BFF

[Midday Giggle]

I have no words...

[Easy breezey]

Awww this chapter got me

[Dusk_Writer]

Dash…;-;

Enjoy your marathon! Ironically, my best friend and I started watching GoT together the other day xD

[Crystal_Star_47]

I love it!

[TheMareWhoSaysNi]

8365185
It's awsome, isn't it? And I don't even like medieval fantasies, usually

[Dusk_Writer]

8378736
Yeah, it isss! The story so good so far