No. I Have One.

by Applejack App

I'm Pretty Sure You're Homeless.

What was Lyra even going on about?

Bipedal apes snatching me up and forcing me into a box?

I came to a slow trot down the road leading towards The Apple Family Farm. Yet suddenly could feel a force wrapping around my waist, yanking me up high off the ground.

“NO! NOT A BOX!” I screamed as the force let go and I hit the ground with a thud.

“What kind of box?” Pinkie Pie gazed down at me in confusion.

I sighed and slowly got back to my hooves, flashing the pink mare an odd gaze. Taking a quick second to shake the dust off my coat and make a soft growling sound.

“Oh! Sorry about slamming you too, was honestly trying to give you a hug!” Pinkie giggled sweetly and used her hoof to smooth out my mane.

“Did I look that upset?” I asked with a slight frown.

“Sort of. Thought I’d bounce over and see what’s bugging you.” The mare spoke in a very quick and bubbly tone.

“Well ponies think I’m homeless!” I pouted aloud and glared down to my hooves.

“Really?”

“What do you mean really!? Yes I have a family!” I snapped back to the confused mare.

“Sorry. It’s just I’ve never seen them.” Pinkie flashed a sheepish smile my way.

“What! I’m with them all the time!”

“Nope.”

“Remember that one time at Burger Barn? I was at the counter with a mare and you bounced up and asked me if I was going to try out…” I began to tell my story as I watched her eyes suddenly light up.

“Oh Yeah! Try The Double Cake Ice Cream Shake!” Pinkie squeed aloud happily.

“Yeah! Remember my mom!?” I smiled happily in return.

“No. Not really.” She spoke in a truly serious tone.

“Short mare! Wild and messy mane…”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Kind of looks like me.” I glared.

“I’m pretty sure you are homeless.” Pinkie just spat out.

“No I’m not!”

“You sure you weren’t like left alone at The Ponyville Home For Lost Ponies?” The mare asked in deep thought.

“We don’t even have that in Ponyville.” I replied in a stone faced manner.

“No! Didn’t your parents get shot in a alley after a ballet?”

“That’s Batmare’s origin…”

“Oh! Again you sure about not being homeless?”

“Pretty dang sure!”

“Home is for the weak?”

“What?” I asked confused.

“Never mind. Well you learn something new all the time! Doesn’t that make you happy?” Pinkie giggled bouncing off into the distance happily.

“NOT ME!” I yelled after her in anger.

What was wrong with ponies today!?

Comments

[Night Music]

“Home is for the weak?”
“What?” I asked confused.

reactiongifs.com/r/2014/01/well.gif

There's the classic Pinkie 4th wall break.

[AzureShade]

If I was in Scootaloo's position at this point I'd be so enraged I'd just go physically GRAB my parents and drag them all over Ponyville screaming some version of 'SEE, THESE ARE MY PARENTS!"

[Applejack App]

8194472 I had the answer to this in the fic, Though was too meta to be shown.

I guess it shall forever remain a mystery.

[Applejack App]

8194084 Nothing beats the classic eh?

[Jonny Bench]

Great reference there

[Bahamuttone]

Hmm Pinkie has a disconnect between Scootaloo and her parents? Because as they are living in Ponyville she KNOWS who they are and at LEAST their birthday ^^;;;

[Vaguely Demented]

If I was given even half a chance at becoming the bat I would go for it.