• Published 4th Jun 2017
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Ofolrodi - Imploding Colon



Rainbow Dash traverses the perils of the Dark Side of the world to reach the Midnight Armory.

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We Your Prey Alone

"Bring them back, Discord!!!" Rainbow howled, teeth barred.

Wildcard jolted, looking all around.

"Wait, what?!" Ariel glanced left and right. "Discord? He's responsible for—?"

"Now!" Rainbow stomped a hoof. "I mean it!"

"Well, okay then!" Discord wriggled with suddenly existing sleeves. "Let me just pull out my magic chaos wand and bibbity bobbity boo until I understand exactly what in the blue fudge you are talking about!" He planted his ghostly knuckles on his hips, frowning at her. "Honestly! After all Mommy and Daddy did to raise a prim and proper east horse, this is the attitude you have to give me?!"

"Discord, I'm not joking around!"

"And, for once—which makes me perfectly nauseated to confess—neither am I, Sparky." Discord stifled a yawn. He examined his talon's claws as he muttered on: "Not that I wish to understand any better, mind you. It would eliminate the suspense, and eliminating the suspense would eliminate the thrill and eliminating the thrill would—"

"Rrrrrrrrgh!" Rainbow Dash flapped her wings and hovered directly in front of him. "You wanted me to talk to you?! Well, here I am! But if we're gonna chat, then you're going to have to level with me!" Her eyes flickered red-on-yellow. "Where. Are. They?!"

He blinked at her. "Huh..." His matching eyes squinted back at the mare. "Almost like looking in a mirror." He pinched two paw pads together. "You might wanna dial back the edge. Just a tad bit. All I ever did in my 'angry' phase was listen to yaks banging their heads against stones. Such a talented group... that is until they sold out with 'Woolywall.'"

"Rainbow..." Ariel nervously hovered up towards the mare, reaching a hoof out. "Please. Calm down and just talk to us—"

Rainbow batted her fetlock away without looking. "Where did you send them, Discord?" Her eyes flickered again, and a monsterous hiss filled her words. "Are they gone forever?"

"Okay." He folded his forelimbs. "I'll tell you what I know. But only because you look sooooooooo adorable right now." He plucked his tooth out, turned it into a pipe, and proceeded to blow bubbles. "It was a dark and stormy twilight..."

"DISCORD!!!"

He shrugged. "They just... fallopian tube'd to wherever it is they like to go when it's beddy-bye time."

"The Vanilla Zone?" Rainbow blinked. "Is that where they are?"

"Pfffft! Hah!" Discord grinned maniacally. "Is that what you prancing ponies call it? What's next? 'Blue Sphere?!?'"

"The Vanilla Zone?" Ariel remarked.

Wildcard gestured something.

Ariel responded, "If that's the case... then th-they should be perfectly fine!"

"I can't believe that," Rainbow stammered, shaking her head. "Not for one second." She scowled at Discord again. "After all, he's obliterated them before. What's stopping him from doing it again?"

"What's stopping your friends from turning me to stone again?" Discord belched. "Ghost stone, that is? Harmony or Chaos—the deus ex mallot swings both ways, Sparky. Or at least, it once did. Alas..." He yanked a chunk of his chest meat away, dissolving it into ectoplasmic strands. "We're both mutually busted, methinks. Gone are the days of rainbow zaparooni. No offense to your bloodline, of course."

"Then..." Rainbow panted, her ears drooping. She looked helplessly up at the floating rocks and levitating debris. "...you h-had..." A gulp. "...nothing to do with this...?"

Discord spread his arms wide. "Do I wear a pink diaper?!" A beat. "Hmmm... sounds rather nice, actually..."

"Rainbow..." Ariel shrugged. "Maybe it wasn't Discord. Whatever happened to your friends—maybe it has something to do with what's happening around us."

"Wowwwwwwwww..." Discord split into four copies of himself for group applause. "How very astute!" He pointed at the Heraldite. "You should listen to side-waifu here. She speaks truth. Also, she's fuzzy."

"But... what?" Rainbow panted, sweating visibly. She pivoted about, and her eyes flickered again and again. "If not you... then what could have caused them to vanish?" A beat. She squinted at the dragonequus. "And for you to appear so vividly...?"

"I know, right?" Discord gestured at his brightly-lit self, as if he was standing on an invisible stage. "Front and center! I belong on the cover of a magazine that middle-aged mares everywhere would read!" He winked. "For articles, of course."

Wildcard's hands lit the air. Rainbow only caught enough to read "chaos" and "unleashed."

"H-huh?" she stammered, short on breath.

Ariel cleared her throat, drifting closer. "Wildcard brings up a good point. What's going on around us... what if we're in an area of pure chaos?"

"Pure... ch-chaos...?"

"Y'know... cuz of the Dark Side and all?" Ariel bit her lip. "It happened before, didn't it? In Verlaxion's lairs? Where she sprung chaotic traps for you? Your friends vanished! Now... it's happening here. Only there's no harmonic filter..."

"Hah! I knew I stayed around for something!" Discord shrunk back into just oneself and grinned. "Good thing I didn't see my own shadow on the Light Side! I would have hibernated for another book, at least. Maybe two!"

"Then... that..." Rainbow panted, hyperventilated. "Th-that means..."

Wildcard's goggles rattled with concern.

"Rainbow?" Ariel floated closer. "You're not looking too good. What's...?"

Before the Heraldite could finish that question, Rainbow Dash looked down. She gazed beyond the heart of the slowly swirling maelstrom of mountainous debris. Far below—past the floating rocks and drifting chunks of earth—she saw a cluster of reflective pale material. Like silver. Glossy, pallid, unearthly. The largest collection of chaos metals she had ever seen lingered far beneath her, drowning, engulfing.

Poisoning.

"Hrmmfff..." Her eyes flickered again. Two fangs protruded from her muzzle as her ruby pendant dimmed even more. "...Luna Poop."

She fainted.

And...

"Rainbow!" Ariel shrieked.

It was too late. The mare fell... plunged. She fell faster than gravity could allow—as if something was purposefully pulling her fragile body towards the nexus of metal.

Ariel flew after her.

Wildcard flew faster.

Sw-Sw-Sw-Swiiiiiish!

Wildcard skirted past rocks and boulders and floating minerals. For a brief moment, Rainbow Dash spotted him... saw the silver glint in his goggles as he pursued her into the heart of discordant energies.

And then she saw nothing. Her eyelids rolled over—hairier—and all she gave the crushing earth below was a guttural growl.

The blackness was her only respite.

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