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It's not even a real holiday.  Rainbow Dash only wishes a certain somepony knew this.

First Published
14th May 2017
Last Modified
14th May 2017
#1 · 2w, 1d ago · 51 · 1 ·

I think I just died.

#2 · 2w, 1d ago · 20 · 1 ·

My birthday is April 4th. I'll consider this a late birthday present, even though we've never talked and you'd have no reason to know this before right now.

Thanks!

#3 · 2w, 1d ago · 11 · ·

Well, that was a very skirtsy story.

#4 · 2w, 1d ago · · ·

My mom's birthday is April Fourth.

#5 · 2w, 1d ago · 17 · ·

>Discord's fault

>Go be the Austreaoh now.

#6 · 2w, 1d ago · 11 · ·

Blame fourths.

#7 · 2w, 1d ago · 1 · ·

This is art

#8 · 2w, 1d ago · · ·

beautiful

simply beautiful

#9 · 2w, 1d ago · · ·

All of my wat for that ending :rainbowlaugh:

#10 · 2w, 1d ago · 15 · ·

petite shadow

Okay Skirts, I know I'm only on the fourth sentence of this, but we need to talk about this little obsession of yours.

Get it?  LITTLE obsession?  I astound myself.

#11 · 2w, 23h ago · 2 · ·

Did...did Rainbow just go Nightmare?  Is that what just happened?

#12 · 2w, 21h ago · 2 · ·

Dash had it up to there with Rarities inharmonius treatment. So decided to give discordant in return.

It Is a Tuesday isnt it? :twilightoops:

#13 · 2w, 21h ago · · ·

>>8161880

Mine too. I'm not sure whether or not to take this personally.

#14 · 2w, 19h ago · 2 · 1 ·

I smiled like a dork at Purrainbow Dash and that mailbox. Not sure if I just found a new favorite ship. :trollestia:

Perched on the edge of the kitchen table, a dumb tortoise bore a dumber smile.  What was dumbest was the polk-a-dot patchwork color scheme of rampant fabulousity dotting the exterior of the reptile's shell.  Each portion sang with a different hue of pastel hoof-polish, and Rainbow could have sworn that her pet tortoise was actually sporting lipstick.  And a bow.  And maybe a tiara.

A soft turtle exhale came from Tank's smiling maw.  A girlish turtle exhale.

“Brrbrbrbrbrrrrr...”  Wincing, Rainbow Dash picked Tank up off the table.  Holding him at full forelegs' length, she gingerly levitated into the bathroom and placed him in the middle of a dry shower stall.  She then deposited a bucket, a sponge, and a tall bottle of window glass cleaner.

The fabulous Geochelone elegante stared curiously at her like a guilty puppy.

“Y-you know what to do, buddy,” Rainbow said, then yawned her way into her upstairs bedroom.

I think Rarity may have, um, helped Tank discover an undiscovered side to himself. This headcanon is now toots accepted. May all fics going forward be full of Princess Tankabellarellaonariel*. Or whatever name they feel deep inside. :duck:

I have no words for how much squees I had reading this through Rarity's POV. Pretty sure she planned to strike at Dash's weakest moment to get the most out of her adorable pranks.

Rarity sure does love angry oblivious hard to get Rainbow Dash.

"Rarity, for the last bucking time MY BARN DOORS DON'T SWING THAT WAY!"

"Oh, darling. I may not be Applejack, but I'm sure I can easily install a... revolving door." Excessive amounts of bedroom eyes follows.

And thus Rainbow Dash went full Discordian Raindoom on Equestria... again.

Thanks for the silliness. Love Cougarity (even if she's not that much older than Dashie, Dashie just has that innocence level vs Rarity's lovey-doviness that just screams adorableness.

This one is more appropriate though.

#15 · 2w, 19h ago · 1 · ·

No!  Rainbow!”  Rarity waved a desperate, dainty hoof.  “Please!  Don't go!”

“Maybe I can find a good hammock to sleep in—”

Oho, IC you sly dog :rainbowlaugh:

Rainbow Dash blinked.  She gnashed her teeth.  “Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...”  Eyes flickered red on yellow.  Two points in her forehead started bleeding as sparks cascaded from her jaw...

O NO

WHAT HAEV YUO DUN?! :pinkiecrazy:

#16 · 2w, 18h ago · · ·

Well that was different, in a most entertaining manner.  Thanks for the chuckles Skirts.

#17 · 2w, 17h ago · 4 · 1 ·

This story made zero sense. But I enjoyed the lack of Pinkie Pie, so it gets high marks from me.

Thanks a lot, fourth.

#18 · 2w, 16h ago · 2 · ·

I'm still not entirely sure what I just read, but I'm pretty sure it was funny so you get a thumbs up anyways

#19 · 2w, 16h ago · · ·

>>8161870 This is your fault!

(This is THE BESSSSSSST.)

#20 · 2w, 15h ago · 2 · ·

W t ha

e h pp

l a en

l t ed

#21 · 2w, 15h ago · 1 · ·

Pure unadulterated win.

[BLAMING FOURTHS INTENSIFIES]

#22 · 2w, 14h ago · 2 · ·

Yes yes yes.

#23 · 2w, 13h ago · 1 · ·

>>8162657 Paint bucket makes all the glimmer stab stabby in the night.

#24 · 2w, 11h ago · · ·

So... Rainbow Dash has a horn now. Two of them, in fact. Demon Dash gets to be an Alicorn Princess now, right?

#25 · 2w, 10h ago · 1 · ·

Dammit, Fourths.

#26 · 2w, 10h ago · 4 · ·

>>8161870

Wait wait -- your first name is April??  :rainbowlaugh:  Jury headcannon accepted!

#27 · 2w, 10h ago · 2 · ·

>>8163273 It is indeed ^_^

#28 · 2w, 7h ago · · ·

This is has to be one of - if not the most - random things I've ever read.

#29 · 2w, 7h ago · · 1 ·

Well. I think that's enough reading for today. My brain has now broken.

(who's a silly pony? you're a silly pony! who is? you is, Rarity!)

#30 · 2w, 6m ago · 3 · ·

dammit fourths.

#31 · 1w, 6d ago · 4 · ·

Skirts, please stop giving us more reason to blame fourths for everything. :heart:

#32 · 1w, 6d ago · · ·

This is basically a "my mind is full of wat" moment, but I still enjoyed it. Greatly. Rarity learned the hard way not to bother a tired Dashie.

#33 · 1w, 6d ago · · 1 ·

I quit!

Although i forgot what I quit from...

#34 · 1w, 6d ago · · ·

>>8162246 wow not sure how that comment posted with triple of the same stuff... wish I had known how borked it was. Oh well, nothing like catching it on a third read I guess! :pinkiecrazy:

#35 · 1w, 6d ago · 1 · ·

I am greatly amused.

Never knew rares had it in her.

#36 · 1w, 3d ago · 2 · ·

Rainbow's house is a cloud. Explain how Rarity boobytrapped a cloud. How? Tell me now.

#37 · 1w, 3d ago · · ·

>>8172805 ESPECIALLY since ONLY TWILIGHT KNOWS THE CLOUD-WALKING SPELL.

Did Twilight teach Rarity the Cloud-walking Spell? Not in canon, and not specified in the story, so I'd have to say no.

Did Rarity steal the Cloud-walking Spell book? Again, unmentioned, so no.

This just makes zero sense whatsoever. If it was Pinkie, it'd be understandable (for all we know, she might be part-pegasus or have an infinite-cloud-walking enchantment as part of her bizarreness), but RARITY?

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