Cell Vs The Rainbooms #CellGames

by Dawn Flower

Cell vs. Vignette Valencia

Perfect Cell stood, as usual, in the exact centre of his ring, waiting patiently for the end of the week, wherein the Cell Games would finally begin; though by this point, thanks to all of the constant interruptions from pre-emptive challengers, his patience was beginning to wear thin. In his annoyance, he let out an exasperated sigh.

“Okay, just a few more days to go until the Cell Games Presented by Hetap officially begins; then I can finally say goodbye to all of these annoying little interruptions and I can finally have my long awaited fight with Goku.”

Suddenly, his soliloquy was interrupted when he sensed a new presence approaching the ring. Since this was nothing new at this point, he just lazily turned his head in that direction to see who it was this time. “Speaking of annoying little interruptions...”

This time it was a young woman, with bright yellow skin, and pink hair with white highlights, who seemed to be around the same age as the other girls that had approached the arena lately. She wore a white crop top, with short shorts, and high heels, underneath a thin, brown leather, tasselled overcoat.

“Oh, wow, another young woman,” Cell drawled sarcastically. “I mean, I know that I’m the most perfect specimen so naturally women would be drawn to me, but you’d think that there would be at least some strong dudes showing up. It’s getting to be a real clam bake around here.” He then let out another sigh. “I miss Goku.”

“So, you must be Perfect Cell,” the young woman finally spoke up, having reached the spot of the ring where all of the other challengers stood when they arrived.

“That’s Mr. Perfect Cell!” Mr. Perfect Cell clarified. “I swear, if one more person makes that mistake, then I won’t even bother correcting them and I’ll just Yamcha them on the spot.”

“Oh, dearie,” the young woman said, casually waving her hand in his direction. “I’m not here to talk about washed up baseball players. My name is Vignette Valencia, and before you ask, yes, I am that Vignette Valencia,” she spoke with pride in her voice. “Word of your Twitter announcement for this little tournament of yours was brought to my attention and I must say that the reception you got was quite im-press-ive… for someone just starting out,” she added.

“Excuse you!” Cell shouted out, feeling insulted. “I managed to get #CellGames trending within just five seconds of me announcing it.”

“And like I said, dearie, it’s a good start for somebody just starting out,” Vignette countered immediately, with an indignant laugh. “But with the proper guidance, I believe that you can become a true social media star, like moi, and I believe that I can show you the way.”

Cell suddenly felt his eye twitch when she said those last two words, but he had no idea why, so he moved on quickly. “You really think that you could do better?” Cell asked.

In response, Vignette smirked and whipped out her phone. “Here, watch this,” she said, as she began tapping away at the screen. “‘Chilling with Mr. Perfect Cell, U know how I do, enjoying a fantabulous business venture, about to change his life for the better. #CellGames #VignetteValencia #Hetap #BYBB’ aaaaaaaaaaand… post. Trending.”

“Wh-what?” Cell uttered. “It’s literally been less than a second since you posted that.”

Vignette just grinned. “Like I said, dearie, I’m that Vignette Valencia. Now then, on to your goals AF,” she continued speaking even as she returned her attention to her phone. “Your face and jawline are very handsome and that voice that goes along with it is just so fleek, so they will be your greatest assets for drawing them in initially, but you’re going to need more if we’re to build on your base platform.

“I suggest a complete makeover, with new brand deals, and switching venues – if we change the whole ‘death tournament’ angle to more traditional ‘battle royale’, it’s going to be a close call, but I think we’ll be able to land a Fortnite sponsorship tie in; eat your heart out, HETAP!

“Also switching over from Twitter to Snapgab,” she added. “I think that it will all go a long way to help you slay them all, become lit and get woke.” She then ended her little spiel with a flashy pose.

Cell’s eyes immediately widened. “Oh, God! You’re one of those millennial people, aren’t you?!”

“Now, we’ll also have to do something your colour palette,” Vignette added, ignoring what he just said. “Sickly puke green and bland grey are just off putting and so 1992. How do you feel about turning your green parts gold and your grey parts purple? I only ask because you’ll absolutely have to do it.”

“Nope, sorry, not doing this.” Cell quickly cut in. “I have put up with a lot of shit over the past couple of days, but this is where I draw the line.”

Cell then extended his arm, to prepare a quick Ki blast to end this moment now; however, before he could, Vignette quickly took his picture, and suddenly everything went white, and a temporary feeling of weightlessness overcame him. Once he felt solid again, he took a look around at his new surroundings, but he could see nothing but a featureless white void.

“Oh, goddammit!” Cell yelled out, steaming in anger. “Mark my words, bitch, I am going to get out of here, and when I do…” He then raised his arm straight up. “I will make you pay!” He yelled, as he fired off a Ki blast into the air, to vent his anger, but he was immediately confused when the roof above him, which was actually there, collapsed on top of him, letting light in, revealing that he was actually just in a very very white room.

Cell blinked in confusion, his anger from earlier dissipating. “Huh.” A brief moment later, letting out a sigh, he found his words again. “Wow, even her victories are underwhelming.”

He then began walking around, taking note of exactly how large the room he was in was. “You know, it’s actually pretty peaceful here, and I’m fairly certain that no one else can get here. Maybe I should just stay here until the Cell Games Presented by Hetap. It would give me some time to myself.” He briefly considered this, but quickly discarded the notion. “Then again, if that girl sends people here whenever she takes their photo, then knowing her, there’ll probably be another fifty people joining me here within the hour, at least.”

Suddenly, he looked down when he felt his foot brush against something. Noticing it, he raised his head up to the sky and yelled, “I don’t know if you can hear me, but I’m eating your stress salad!” He then let out another sigh before kneeling down to pick up the bowl. “I definitely need after these past couple of days.”

Comments

[Raistlin]

To think Vignette goddamn Valencia would be the most successful adversary

[lord Martiya]

9540240
Actually, that would be Kenshiro.

[Dustchu]

Oof, big oof for Cell, lol.

Good show

[Smashbrosarrmagedon]

9540240
Don't worry, he going back again after he chill out... and kill her in the process

SO it's a Win/Win for him

[WorldWalker128]

9540240
Okay, I haven't been keeping up with official MLP material lately, who IS that character? I don't even know who she is and I wish cell had blasted her. Wouldn't want him to eat her, because then he might get infected with her mindset.
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So this is the last chapter? Darn.

[Raistlin]

9660158

Your google-fu is weak: see

[Alondro]

10005788 I know. I am one, after all. But I'm an equal-opportunity Hyper Troll.

[Spellflame]

wow.

[Prince Lightning Charge]

You know, I'm not sure why but this one felt more like one of DevilArtemis's cell vs. Just with less Kermit.