• Published 23rd Apr 2017
  • 11,059 Views, 6,166 Comments

Magic School Days - Dogger807

When the CMC asked Discord to help them attend magic school, he pulled an owl out of his hat. Only he didn't exactly have a hat. Which was okay, since their new school had a singing one laying around. Where the hay was Hogwarts anyway?

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Author's Note:

I have received several PM informing me that my prologue and 1st chapter do not reflect my current writing skills. It has been suggested several times that I either rewrite them or leave a notice at the start, stating that the level of readability sharply increases half way through chapter 1 or beginning of chapter 2, depending on who you ask.

I currently wish to continue with new chapters, as my muse demands. So, I will go with the notice idea, for the time being.

Since beginning to write this story I have been introduced to the Ezn guide and had helpful criticism aplenty. If you, as a new reader, would please attempt to maintain curiosity until chapter 2, you may find the story to your liking.



If your idea of a good story is dependent on Dumbledore not being called out for his gross criminal actions, then this tale is not for you. The author is well aware of all the rational that people use to justify Dumbledore's actions and does not accept any of the arguments. Willingly and knowingly leaving a child in an abusive environment is unacceptable and deplorable to the highest degree. The excuse of blood wards is flimsy at best and, even if true, do not negate Dumbledore's complicity to the crime. To do what Dumbledore did in cannon takes either maliciousness or a startling degree of incompetence.

While Dumbledore was never meant to be the pivotal point of this work, too many have commented on how they feel showing Dumbledore in a bad light ruins it for them. All I can say is remember this is is an alternate reality fiction. You are not obligated to share the same view of the original Dumbledore as the author.

Once again, it was nearing the end of summer, leaving for a beautiful day in Ponyville and the surrounding countryside. The birds were in their trees, singing the songs birds sing. The frogs were in their ponds croaking their joyous chorus. The young fillies were lying in the grass, panting and covered in tree sap, well, three fillies, anyway -- three little fillies who were tired of being blank flanks -- three industrious fillies determined to meet their destinies head on by any means possible -- three fillies in desperate need of a bath. The sap was sticky.

“Aaaaaaand,” the first filly, a little orange pegasus named Scootaloo, began, “Check Cutie Mark Lumberjacks off the list.”

“I can’t believe we didn’t see that one coming.” The unicorn of the group groused, rubbing her white pelt, “With our record, why would we think that taking a saw to a tree was a good idea?”

“Ah still say it was a good try, Sweetie Belle.” The final filly, a yellow earth pony known as Apple Bloom replied, “How were we to know that tree would be that aggressive?”

“Good try?!” Sweetie Belle squeaked, “That tree shot out a stream of sap at least ten trots long. We barely nicked it and it started playing target the pony.”

“Well, it stands to reason that it would be a might mad after we tried to cut it down.” Apple Bloom untied the bow in her hair because the excess sap was causing it to sag into her eyes.

“Trees aren’t supposed to shoot sap like that,” Sweetie Belle tried to explain to her. “Trees aren’t supposed to target dodging pegasi who dodge the first squirt.”

“Yah, it sure had surprisingly good aim for an overgrown stick.” Scootaloo sighed. “But I’m sure that it’s normal tree behavior considering all the times we’ve been covered in sap.”

“But trees aren’t supposed to be sapient!” Sweetie protested, “They’re supposed to be trees.”

“Ah don’t rightly know what sapient means,” Apple Bloom interjected, “but it has sap in it, and I sure can vouch trees have sap, so it stands to reason that they’re sapient.”

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Scootaloo quickly agreed.

Sweetie Belle wisely let it drop. After all the tree had been aiming at Scootaloo, and they did live next to the Everfree. “Still, that was a lot of sap to get out of such a little nick.”

“It’s not like they got anything better to do than stand around and make sap to shoot at ponies,” Scootaloo reminded her.

“Enough sap talk.” Apple Bloom stood up. “Let’s go get cleaned up.”

“Can we wait a bit?” Sweetie Belle asked. “I want to give Rarity a little more time to get involved in her dress making so she doesn’t see me covered again.”

“Y’all don’t need to go home,” Apple Bloom stated. “Before we got started, Ah asked my sister to set the washtub out behind the barn for us. It should be ready for us to go get cleaned up.”

“That works.” Scootaloo stood up, shook like a dog, and started to head toward the barn.

“Wait. What??!” Sweetie jumped to her hooves and faced Apple Bloom. “You knew we were going to be covered in sap?”

“We were planning on taking a saw to a tree.” Apple Bloom shrugged and started to follow Scootaloo. “How could Ah not see that coming?”

Bringing up the rear, Sweetie Belle thought that there was something really wrong with that whole conversation, even if she couldn’t quite put her hoof on what.


Ten minutes later, they were in a wooden tub, scrubbing the sap out of each other’s coats and manes. Not one of them wanted to voice it, but they were each surprised and glad they hadn’t earned their sap remover cutie marks. No matter how good they became at the chore, none of them wanted to wear that on their flank.

“Well,” Apple Bloom sighed around the scrub brush in her mouth. “School starts next week. That’ll mean we’ll have ta cut back on our crusading an’ we still ain’t got our marks to show for it.”

“I’m not looking forward to hearing Diamond Tiaraaaaaaa! Hey! Watch my wing there, Sweetie! I almost wish we were going to a different school just to miss out on that.”

“Sorry, my brush slipped. I kinda wish we were all going to Celestia’s school in Canterlot. Not that I wouldn’t miss Cheerilee, but there would be soooo much more to do and learn.”

“That school’s only for unicorns. An’ Ahm an earth pony, they’d never let me in.”

“I heard my sister talking to Twilight. They’re gonna start an earth pony and pegasus pony program there this year.”

“Really?” Apple Bloom brightened. “That’s not so far, we could be home for the weekends. We’d meet all kinds of new ponies.”

Sweetie Belle’s ears drooped. “The problem is they’ve closed the enrollment for this year.”

“Then why’d you bring it up?” Scootalooo scoffed

“I don’t know.”

“That’s ok Sweetie, we’d probably have ta pass all kinds of hard tests and follow all kinds of rules ta get in.” Apple Bloom dipped her brush in the water and began attacking Sweetie Belle’s flank again.

“Yeah, but It sounds cool. I bet they even have an advanced flying class. Pity about the whole rules thing,” Scootaloo said.

“Wait a minute!” Sweetie perked up, dropping her brush in the water. “Who do we know that practically makes it his mission to get around rules?”

There was a moment of silence as all three fillies looked at each other, all knowing this idea just had to be tried. They all knew they’d regret it if they didn’t at least give it a go. Still it had to be said, so Apple Bloom broke the silence and said it. “Thar ain’t no way this is gonna end well.”

After their collective bath, three fillies went looking for trouble, and everypony knows trouble’s name starts with a “D”.


The obvious place to start looking was Fluttershy’s cottage. So, the three friends decided to start there, arguing on the walk as to how to handle the situation. Scootaloo thought it might be a good idea to bribe him with cupcakes. Meanwhile, Sweetie Belle was thinking that some kind of trick might be more effective and better received from the trickster. Apple Bloom was having none of that and stated flatly that they were just going to be honest about the whole thing, proving that some things are just genetic no matter what other ponies might think.

“Anyways,” Sweetie Belle murmured as their destination came within sight. “What are the odds of him actually being here right now?”

A voice behind them smugly asked, “What are the odds of who being here right now?”

Turning around they beheld an outlandish, yet familiar, figure. With serpentine body and mismatched limbs, Discord was smiling down on them giving undivided attention.

“All right,” Sweetie Belle deadpanned. “Everypony who saw that coming, please raise your hoof.” They all raised their front right hoof except Discord, who raised his rear hoofed leg.

“Am I getting predictable?” Discord pouted. “And here I thought you wanted to have a conversation with little old rule-breaking me.”

“Yup,” Apple Bloom thought. “Thar ain’t no way this is gonna end well. Ah wonder if it’s too late to run away screaming at the top o’ mah lungs.”

“We do!” Scootaloo chirped in, forgetting all about the cupcake angle. “We wanna go to magic school, and we need your help to get us in.”

“You three want to go to magic school? Hmmmm.” Discord rubbed his chin as he studied the girls. “Well, I must say, that is rather unexpected. Most fillies your age want my help avoiding school, not the other way around. Still, I suppose I should give credit where credit is due and outfit you for this little quest of yours.”

“Going to school is a quest?” Scootaloo tilted her head to the side with a questioning look.

“Oh, my my my. Yes, it is. Especially as you get older,” the draconequus answered. “And as I said, it’s time to outfit you. It’ll make it easier for you to get all of your hidden achievements later.”

Three young ponies stared at him, lost.

“First on the list is acceptance letters.” Discord reared back to his full height and stretched out his lion’s paw. “That should be easy enough.” He snapped his claws. In a mild flash of light, a startled owl appeared and reflexively perched on the proffered limb. Discord smiled and untied three letters from the owl’s leg. “Here we go.”

“Who?” the owl hooted looking more surprised than any owl had a right to.

“It’s just me,” Discord replied




“You know, Discord.”


“The spirit of chaos.”


“Never mind.” The fillies watched the exchange like cats watching a tennis match.

Discord floated the letters down to the waiting children and continued. “Step two is to send back an acceptance of your acceptance letters. Since the deadline is past someowl is going to have to go on a trip in time as well as space.” Another snap and a new letter was tied to the owl’s leg.

“Who?” the owl managed to hoot, looking worried.

“I think you know who,” was the answer, followed by a snap of claws. The owl disappeared in a flash of light as if it were never there.

“Okay, now you’ll need money for tuition and supplies. That’s not even going to take much magic.” With yet another snap of claws, one of Rarity’s work cupboards appeared. “I don’t think your sister would mind contributing toward your education.” A drawer opened and some gems floated out only to end up in a pouch Discord was holding even though nopony saw him pull it out. “Just take these to the bank and you should have more than enough.”

Snap. This time the cupboard disappeared to whence it had come and was replaced by scroll tied in a red ribbon. The draconequus was on a roll. “This is your ticket home when you’ve learned enough magic.” The scroll disappeared into the pouch even though it was obviously too large to fit. “Oh, one more thing.” Suddenly there were three pendants hovering in the air only to make their way into the pouch as well. “You’ll need these to fit in at first, but I suspect you’ll make friends fast.”

Discord tied the pouch and tossed it. Somehow it ended up on a lanyard around Apple Bloom’s neck

“There we go. You’re all equipped, except for the wooden sword,” Discord relayed to his audience. “Off you go now.” With one final snap of his claws, the fillies were no longer on the path leading to Fluttershy’s.

Blinking their eyes the young adventures found they were in an alleyway, a dirty alleyway, and right after they had taken a bath.

“That went better than I was expecting,” Sweetie Belle said around the letter in her mouth.

“Less than two minutes after asking Discord a favor we find ourselves in a strange alleyway?” Apple Bloom shot her a look. “Ah’d say that’s about average.”

Meanwhile, Scootaloo was giving into curiosity and was reading her letter. “Girls?” she asked “What the hay is Hogwarts?”

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