Chapter 4
A single spot of bright orange stood out in sharp contrast to the blanket of white that buried Ponyville. Up in a tree, still clinging to a naked, almost skeletal branch, a lone leaf remained, a leaf that refused to let go, a leaf that refused to fall. Somehow, it persisted. It persevered, and something about this resonated deep within Sumac Apple.
Sitting in his sled, being towed behind Lemon Hearts, Sumac focused on the leaf. So many thoughts flooded into his mind all at once and he was overwhelmed. After his encounter with Queen Chrysalis, Sumac knew without doubt how fragile life was, and he was all too aware of just how close to death he had come. But this leaf, this solitary, lone leaf, it made him think about how resilient life was. The leaf had defied its expiration and now continued to persist, not just existing, but also bringing a little spot of much needed colour to others. It was an inspiration, and Sumac was quite taken by it, so much so that he felt a lump rising in his throat.
“Stop,” he begged, and much to his relief, the sled came to a halt. Sumac watched as all three mares turned their heads to look at him, all of them snorting steam in the frigid weather. Trixie had an eyebrow raised, Lemon Hearts had a curious expression, and Twinkleshine looked alarmed. For Sumac, their faces all reflected how they responded to a situation, a reminder of the purpose and function that each of them served in their little budding family.
“What’s wrong?” Twinkleshine asked.
Trixie began to look around, her eyebrow still raised. “Why are we stopping?”
With a great deal of effort, Sumac lifted his foreleg and pointed upwards, at the leaf. “It still exists.”
Trixie, Lemon Hearts, and Twinkleshine all looked up, and each of them focused upon the solitary leaf. Boomer poked her head out from beneath Sumac’s poncho and began to look around, all while snapping at any snowflakes that came too close. Based upon the curious, confused expressions of the three mares, Sumac began to realise that he was having a moment, one of his special moments, the kind of special moment where he was going to have to explain himself to other ponies.
It was a bit disheartening.
Octavia would understand, because she was an introvert. She understood the sudden flood of emotions that seemed to happen for no reason. Sumac let his foreleg fall, then he pulled it back beneath his poncho and the old saddle blanket that covered him. He blinked a few times, rapid blinks, focusing his vision upon the vivid orange leaf that somehow maintained its precarious connection to the tree.
“It still exists,” Sumac said to the three mares.
“I don’t get it.” Twinkleshine tilted her head to one side, then the other, and she stared upwards while snowflakes clung to her pastel pink mane. “It’s just a leaf.”
Feeling a growing sense of frustration, Sumac stared at Twinkleshine and felt a moment of foalish anger that left him feeling hot beneath his winter outwear. “Everything is dead, all of the other leaves are gone, but this one still exists. It still has something to offer to the world. It’s still hanging on and it won’t let go.”
“It’s just a leaf,” Trixie said to her son and now, she focused on him. “You feeling okay, Sumac?”
“I’m fine,” Sumac snapped and he could feel the crankiness overtaking him. He began to wonder if one of them might suggest he needed a nap, and he hated it when that was brought up. Yes, he needed naps, but there was no point in bringing it up. “Don’t you see how meaningful it is? It’s beautiful… it has meaning… can’t you see that?”
“I suppose it is kinda pretty.” Lemon Hearts blinked and several snowflakes clung to her long eyelashes. “It’s just a leaf though, and it hasn’t fallen yet. The wind will pick up and it’ll be gone, soon enough.”
Feeling as though he was just wasting his breath, Sumac chose silence. He stared up at the leaf, watching it tremble in the wind, and the three mares began to stamp around in the snow, impatient. It wasn’t so much of an icy crunch, but more of a slushy squish. It didn’t take long for them to start moving again, and there was a jerk when Lemon Hearts began to walk, tugging the sled along behind her.
As the sled began to move, Sumac focused upon the lone, solitary leaf, determined to draw as much meaning from it as he could, to think and contemplate its poetic beauty. To the five year old, the lingering leaf was a profound moment in his life, a realisation of deeper meaning, of ideals, an awakening of the concept of aesthetics, though he had no name yet to call it.
It was also a sad moment, in a profound sort of way, as he also realised that others just saw a leaf.
Ponyville Cemetery was buried beneath the snow with most of the headstones swallowed up in the vast expanse of white. The trees were naked, bared, they looked like bony hands reaching up from the graves, all save one. This tree had leaves, it was green, and for whatever reason, the snow did not accumulate upon its branches.
Beneath this tree was a familiar looking mare wearing a familiar looking hat and she had a familiar looking red ribbon tied around the tip of her tail, a ribbon that stood out in sharp contrast against the white snow. Upon seeing her, the lone surviving leaf was forgotten and Sumac became quite excited, so much so that his legs began twitching on their own without him thinking about it.
As the sled passed through the iron gates, the mare turned to watch, her eyes squinting beneath the brim of her hat. After a moment, her head turned once more, and she resumed looking at the strange tree that seemed untouched by winter’s killing cold. The sled traveled over the slushy snow with a wet squelch and Sumac was thankful that the tow rope was long enough that no fly-back from Lemon Hearts’ hooves landed upon him.
“Howdy,” Applejack said as the three mares and the sled drew nearer. “It’s a wet snow, and I didn’t think anypony would come out to these here parts today.”
Sitting in the sled, his head propped up on a folded blanket, Sumac could hear the pain in Applejack’s voice. He felt awkward, there was a lot he wanted to say, but all he could think about was the recent revelation about their relationship. Not only was Applejack his cousin, but due to a bit of unfortunate amorousness among Apple family members, Applejack was also his aunt. This left Sumac quite confused on what to call her.
“Sumac wanted to talk to his dad,” Lemon Hearts said to Applejack. “So, we all got bundled up and made the trip. It looks like you wanted to talk to his dad too.”
“I suppose I did,” Applejack replied in a flat voice. “I suppose I did.”
“What’s wrong?” Trixie moved a little closer to Applejack, lifted Sumac out of the sled, and set him down upon her back. Then she began to smooth out his poncho, making sure it wasn’t bunched up or otherwise uncomfortable.
“Time is a funny thing.” Applejack began to shuffle around in the snow, and she looked up at the apple tree that seemed to be in the throes of spring. Her eyes focused on the bright red and white knitted scarf that somepony had tied around the trunk. “Time passes, and with each passing day, sometimes, the things you felt was right, you don’t feel that they is so right no more.”
“Regrets?” When Twinkleshine spoke the word, the steam coming from her lips almost, but not quite, looked like it formed a question mark.
“Plenty.” Applejack closed her eyes for a brief moment, when she opened them, she glanced around at the three mares that had joined her around the tree. “I done told him that if he ever laid a hoof on Sumac ever again, that I’d beat him to an inch of his life, and I did. At the time, it felt like the right thing to do. I was real emotional, ya see…”
Trixie nodded.
“I done tried to act like it was a noble thing I done, but that’s a load a horseapples.” Applejack’s lips pressed together and protruded outwards, making her muzzle look elongated and a bit silly. “The long and the short of it is, I did it for a lot of reasons, and not all of them good. I hated him for what he’d done to the family name, ya see. And now, after some time has passed, and I’ve done seen Princess Luna coming and going through the doors that show up in my dreams, I have come to realise that I have made a mistake.”
“So you came out to apologise?” Lemon Hearts asked.
“Eeyup,” Applejack replied, sounding very much like her brother. “I’ve done been beating myself up, a wondering if there might have been something I could’ve done, some way I could have pruned away his wickedness and made him behave. We Apples, we have this rash temper, ya see, and sometimes, it messes with our judgment.”
“I hadn’t noticed,” Trixie said with a wry smile.
Applejack too, smiled, let out a sigh, and then turned to look at Sumac. The wind picked up a bit and the falling snow blew a bit sideways, tugging and pulling on winter outerwear while threatening to steal Applejack’s hat. Boomer, tucked beneath Sumac’s poncho, seemed to be asleep, or just not moving at the moment. After staring at Sumac for a bit, Applejack returned to looking at the tree.
“Sometimes, I worry if’n Big Mac and I are good examples for Sumac,” Applejack said to the ponies around her. “Big Mac has some rather old-fashioned ideas about the mare-folk that nice ponies call quaint, and not-so-nice ponies call something else entirely. I ain’t perfect either, though sometimes I act like I am. I know I look down my nose at others, and I can have some trouble admitting when I done did wrong.”
“But you’re doing it now,” Lemon Hearts said in a soft, supportive whisper.
“Yeah, but if I was a good pony, I’d’ve done did it before the guilt chewed up my innards. The only reason I’m spilling my guts now is ‘cause I can’t stand myself or this feeling I done gots inside. I’ve done been feeling like a bit of a hypocrite lately, on account of how I point out everything wrong with others, while a lot of the same is also wrong with me.”
Sumac, lying prone on Trixie’s back, rested his chin against the damp collar of her coat. He took every one of Applejack’s words to heart and hoped that one day, should it be necessary, that he would have the same sort of courage to be so honest about himself. He drew in a deep breath, filling his lungs with cold air, and started to wonder if he had anything meaningful to say.
“Big Mac means well,” Lemon Hearts said while her hooves shuffled in the wet snow, and white flakes clung to her damp fetlocks. “He’s what you call courtly. I’ve never felt belittled or slighted around him, even if his views are old-fashioned.”
“Yeah, well, he set me off the other day and we done had ourselves a fight.” Applejack, unable to look anypony in the eye, turned away and stared at the distant fence.
“What’d he say?” Twinkleshine asked, because somepony had to, otherwise there might be an awkward silence.
Baring her teeth, Applejack let out an angry whinny, and tossed her head around a bit, causing the snowflakes on the brim of her hat to slide off. “He said something about y’all.”
“He did?” Lemon Hearts head tilted off to one side, and her eyes were filled with warm concern. “I’m sure he meant well. What did he say?”
“I dunno if I should—”
“Applejack, I think you’ll feel better if you let it out.” Lemon Hearts’ tone was both maternal and insistent.
“Oh, he done made it clear that he was fine with how y’all are, he ain’t got no problem with that, not at all, and he kept telling me that over and over while I cussed him out… what he does have a problem with is that Sumac ain’t got no daddy and Big Mac is real, real worried that you three mares won’t raise him right, that you’ll turn him into a sissy, and Mac is real upset that Sumac doesn’t have a male perspective in the house. He thinks that you three should have a stallion in y’alls little herd for Sumac’s benefit.”
“I see.” Lemon Hearts voice was one of utter quiet and calm. “Big Mac is entitled to his opinion and he is allowed to be concerned.”
“How can ya be so calm about it?” Applejack demanded. “I wanted to give him a black eye for sayin’ it!”
“I don’t think Big Mac meant any malice when he said it,” Lemon Hearts replied, and she shot a preemptive glance at Twinkleshine, whose face was turning a ruddy shade of pink. “Big Mac loves Sumac and he is allowed to voice his concerns, even if they are worrisome or come from being misinformed. Ponies make a lot of assumptions about we three mares, that we’ll raise a sissy, that we can’t keep Sumac safe, and that it is somehow wrong for three mares to raise a rugged, masculine colt. I don’t even bat an eye anymore, because I want to be a good role model for Sumac.”
“That’s part of the reason I done come out here today, was to get out of the house for a spell and clear my head.” Applejack turned to look at Lemon Hearts and gave the lemony yellow mare a nod. “When Mac and I start fighting, it upsets Hidden Rose and Ambrosia a whole lot.”
“Why do you think he’s still green?” Sumac asked, hoping to change the subject.
“Say again?” Applejack looked Sumac right in the eye.
“Flam. He has leaves and even apple blossoms.” Sumac’s eyes angled upwards. “Why do you suppose that is?”
Squinting, chewing on her own lip, Applejack craned her head back and looked up at the green, leafy branches up above her head. “Tarnish done thinks it’s ‘cause this tree has a soul… and with that soul comes a bit of magic. This here tree will never know winter. It’ll stay a strong, hardy tree.”
There was a long, low groan, and Sumac hoped it was the wind. He really wanted it to be the wind, but he had his suspicions that it might be something else. Looking at the scarf tied around the trunk, he saw that somepony had left a peppermint stick tucked into the folds of the knot.
“Say,” Lemon Hearts said in voice that seemed to warm the winter air, “who wants to go to Sugarcube Corner to get warm?”
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While it may be against my better judgement to say this one... Discords.
8090206
I am a fluffy pillow... and so I shall remain until the hurt goes away. Why won't the hurt go away? Why?
Lets take a look inside the head of Flam. I think that would be a Tree-at.
I hate my humor sometimes.
I'd love to hear what this part is all about, but I know you've stated previously that you only have plans for Applejack to be a background character, nothing more.
8090229
Even if she was a main character, how would it explain this, seeing as how it has to do with another pony entirely?
I would like to see Olive's and Silver Linings. I'd like to get their views on how Sumac's recovery is coming along.
8090237
They will actually be in this story a little later along. I'll see what I can do.
8090229
Has this come up before? I must have glossed over it. Could someone please point me in the right direction? Thank you.
I want to see Twilight deal with her manipulations and following in her mentors footsteps using children as weapons. (I know they had an argument about it in one story but I want to see the fallout of her realizing she's essentially doing the same thing)
Also, that whole scene with the leaf was sad, and poignant, and profound. Some have said that adulthood is where imagination goes to die. I hope that Sumac takes up painting, or poetry, or finds some way to express that which he sees around himself.
So many heads to get into I really want to see when Sumac meets Megera for the first time.
8090265 Its not using children as weapons as much as the realization if she doesn't at least protect them others will use them. Sumac was right about the nature of the people that want him in his talk with Chrystallis at the end of "Princess Twilight Sparkle's School for Fantastic Foals". What Chrystallis did to Sumac is mild to what others will do and
It would be nice to get in vinyl's head. We know alot about her from other ponys, but we never get those lasting monolauges (out loud or internally) that we get from other characters like Tarnish and Sumac.
8090369
In Skyreach, we explore Vinyl's headspace.
She's complicated.
8090232 Well, if she was a main character, then the reason she's both a cousin AND an aunt could be explained later. As she's only been a background character up to this point, we know very little about her family or the events in her life.
8090393
But what makes you think I would explain that?
In this instance, it is something best left to the reader's imagination. It is more engaging this way. Why mess this up?
Whose head? Well we get quite enough of Tarnish. Dare i say that Maud and Pebble, while we get many looks from others on them, not much from them is shown.
Vinyl gets explored in Skyreach, Octi here and there, Twilight gets covered.
Starlight needs some i would think.
Ooh! Discord.
We do need some Olive, and many other students on that matter.
8090206 Living up to your name, ain'tcha?
8090371 Thanks. Loving all of your stories, including skyreach. Any chance MFD will get some love?
If those lazy earth ponies had just done their jobs properly, there wouldn't *be* a last lingering leaf to make kids get weird ideas about death.
8090274
8090446
Maybe? I really do need to get back to that.
8090215
win
I'm not entirely sold on the bit about the leaf. Couldn't you have used another adult not as close to Sumac to deny his epiphany? Those mares, more than most others, would at least try to humor him from your depictions so far. They'd try to understand what he was seeing, even if they had to ask or talk him through it. They're too close to him to (at this point) just brush aside something that he's shown is important to him in some way like they're ready to ignore him and get on with their day. They, especially, understand that it's moments like those which shape a young unicorn's outlook and such.
8090451
That, to me, raises the question: is he finding the beauty on everyday things, or is he externalizing his own feelings?
8090569
To be fair, it's easier to be open to poetic epiphanies when you're not trudging through the slush, pulling a sled.
8090569
8090593
This. Poor Lemon, a unicorn, being made to pull a sled through frozen slush, freezing her tuchus off, all because some wacky colt wants to visit the cemetery in the middle of fronking winter.
8090262 The MFD story does to a degree, enough to understand this.
It might be odd, but what about Luna as she tries to calm their nightly thoughts on these issues, maybe a narrative from her while mending minds?
8090611
Swans.
I'm trying to puzzle out Sumac and Applejack's connection and the apparent solution is that Hidden Rose and Ambrosia's father is Flim.
I get the leaf Sumac. Life has a tenacity all but unmatched.
I would like to get in the head of Twinkleshine.
8090765
No no no... Hidden Rose and Ambrosia's father is not an Apple.
8090767
I never got much practice with family tree dynamics, my bad.
Flam tree makes candy?
Not sure if we have gotten into Twinkleshine's head as of yet in any of the weedverse stories. She could be an interesting perspective since we haven't had her express as much of her worries, insecurities, hopes, and so on that a lot of other characters have expressed to a greater extent.
8090453 Just rereading Venenum Iocus and the MFD references made me smile.
The reread also makes me look forward to this and getting more of a peak into Pebble's family life. It will be fun to see Grr and Flamingo during the holidays along with Pebble's sisters and brothers.
That and I can just imagine Tarnish razzing Sumac for dating his little girl.
I really kinda wanna go into Twinkleshine's head. We don;t get a whole lot about her perspective.
8090323 She has literally fed him Zap Apple tincture so she, and others, can fight better. As much as I love Twilight (and I do) she doesn't just protect an asset, she puts them to use. She has no qualms about feeding that poor sorcerer stupid juice and turning him into a pale brown vegetable if it furthers her current need.
8090274 Oh, Mac will just love that tidbit.
I'd like a peek into Pebble's head, meself. It was always interesting to read what she thought in the, what, two times it happened last story? I mean PTSSFTF, not Gift of Gab.
8090801 No more like concentrated peppermint oil burns. Some animal trainer have used it to discourage biting or chewing. Its also way of discouraging mice in places were you wouldn't want poison rather than using moth balls
8091893
8091905 No one ever reads the group forums
I didn't even know that was a thing that existed before you pointed it out. Most readers just check the stories' description for this sort of thing.
Goddamnit, an Apple somewhere reinforcing all those "country bumpkin" stereotypes.
8090592
Can't it be both?
8090930
I'm more interesting in seeing Meghara. We've seen some of her, later on, but this is when she's just arrived, with practically no experience with pony society at all.
8093411
Sucks.
It's not so much that he used the word, it is the fact that he wasn't thinking when he said something negative. That could cause big problems later, so Lemon is trying to curb the problem now.
8090225 Methinks you're barking up the wrong tree with that, mate. Leaf the jokes for others.
8093417 ah okay, makes sense. Honestly it just doesn't even register to me sometimes. My mind just goes "I'm not good at combat spells" which didn't seem particularly negative.
"Big Mac is real, real worried that you three mares won’t raise him right, that you’ll turn him into a sissy, and Mac is real upset that Sumac doesn’t have a male perspective in the house. "
Don't worry. Spike will teach him how to belch, scratch, and grunt when talking about hoofball.
8120268 I think Sumac will have good father figures in Big Mac and Tarnish Teapot. Though Big Mac is right, Sumac needs a male perspective in his upbringing, ideally a father but that isn't always possible other relatives and family friends will have to pick up the slack.
What did I miss?
I don't remember this at all.
So, this is something I had been wanting to hear from Applejack for awhile, as those of you who read my incredibly long posts are no doubt aware. It makes me feel good about Applejack, truth be told. It doesn't ease my concerns about what happened in the first place, as there's a bit more to it than Applejack doing a bad thing, but I'm glad AJ has come around.
Big Mac makes me uneasy. I'm not sure how to feel about him.
I feel for you Sumac. It kinda sucks having to explain everything that comes out of your mouth to everyone around you.
8142692
You didn't miss anything, Sumac just learned about the family tree a bit, that's all.
You know, I can't help but find it interesting that Sumac now is so averse to be snuggled and such by Trixie, when later in life he acts different around her specifically to so he won't change the kind of parent/child relationship he grew up with. It's the same character at different points of his life, but it seems to flow naturally. It's not easy to pull that off, so I admire how you've managed to do so.
Somehow, this reminds me of Pinkie Pie, and how she's had a journey all her own, a lot of which has only ever been alluded to or described long after the fact. Her first boyfriend cheated on her and broke up with her because she wouldn't sleep with him. This seems to stand in stark contrast to her and Seville having a one-night stand (if I recall correctly). Yet, add in her chasing of Cheese Sandwich, and it because easy to see how her story likely played out. By all accounts, Pinkie has been on an emotional roller coaster. Her journey has been a rather depressing one, and I'm glad good things seem to be on the horizon for her.
I'm not really sure these two paragraphs fully relate, but I'm quite tired as I type this.