• Member Since 28th Nov, 2011
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

HolyCross9


An autistic Christian who likes MLP:FiM.

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Source

After another day of helping patients at Ponyville General, Nurse Redheart heads for home. But on along the way, she runs into an old friend, Tough Talker, now disheveled, disoriented, and battered, lying within an alleyway. Thus after taking him home, getting him nourished, well-fed, and cleaned up, Redheart learned something tragic from Tough Talker: that he had a severe estrangement from a close friend he has known for years. A month had passed since that time and Tough Talker's life has gone on a chaotic downward spiral. Can Redheart help mend her old friend's broken heart? Can she lift Tough Talker of out his depression?

This is my tribute to all nurses everywhere around the world for serving and helping those in great need, both on and off the field.

It is also a tribute to all those diagnosed with autism, Asperger's syndrome, and ADHD, especially those who struggle in real life.

Also, please make sure that your comments are kind, constructive and sensitive. I will block/delete ANY AND ALL flames and negative comments (which includes shaming, long disciplinary paragraphs, and tirades), for this is a story I poured my heart and soul into writing; negative reception is very discouraging and demoralizing for me as a writer, so I ask once again ensure that your statements are both sensitive and encouraging. Thank you very much.

Also, this story was edited and reviewed by Thunderblast and Georg.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 29 )

This is disgusting. How do you not have more followers, this story is a fantastically amazingly awesome piece of literature masterpiece that needs to be known. If I had one gripe with this is that the dialogue was very few and far and between, and an important part (at least to me) of a story is dialogue because that allows the reader to process the characters growth. Fortunately though, you did just that without much dialogue and I loved that. Another thing that I would like to see is that you showed his progress through individual chapters, but you managed to cram what I would use about 7 chapters into a single one-shot.

Just one question, but you don't have to answer if you feel uncomfortable about it, but do you know the user you were talking about?

8641784
Thank you very much! It was intended as a short story, not a multi-chaptered one.

Also, I'll tell you the identity of the user via a PM.

Good LOrd!!

I have a confession to make. I have Asperger's syndrome, and i do indeed have trouble socializing with people. MAny people would think of it as a disability, but i think of Asperger's as a gift.

This story..........is perfect.

8641858
Thanks! I'm joyful that you love the story. I also agree that it is a gift indeed.

8641864
Yeah.

From one kid with Aspergers to you, i say thank you!!

8641873
You're very welcome!

Comment posted by The Bricklayer deleted Mar 4th, 2018
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Comment posted by The Bricklayer deleted Feb 15th, 2018
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Comment posted by HolyCross9 deleted Mar 2nd, 2018

A tribute to people diagnosed with autism and ADHD huh? Well that means me then.

You did a really good job with this story, but I agree about there not being enough dialogue.

8769315
Fear not, for I intend to fix that sometime in the future.

Sorry for taking so long!

Great work and very touching story. I do like this and I like the idea of the main six serving as almost therapists.

I do agree it could have used more dialog, but overall it's excellent as is.

8774987
Thanks buddy! And don't worry, I'm planning on fixing the dialogue issue sometime in the near future.

One of my best friends has autism, so I always like seeing it addressed in writing. I liked the visual of the fire being what kept Luna out.

One thing to watch with your grammar is the tenses: being consistent about past vs. present tense (I recommend past for story-telling; it usually flows better).

8794313
Thanks, I'll be sure to keep that in mind.

One of the underlying themes in my stories is that anyone can be more than what they are, if they have the wisdom and the will to do so.
This story works along those lines. It's interesting that you used this story as a form of therapy for yourself. Writing is great for that sort of thing, which is why I do it, no matter how few views the stories (often) get.
I've lost friends due to my emotion-driven smeg-ups before, so I can relate to Tough Talker. I've matured a lot since those dark times, but the memories still sting.
I'm glad that you wrote this story, so I'm faving it.

9327305
Thank you very much. I really do appreciate that.

It's very heartwarming to see that Tough Talker had friends to pick him up when he fell, and became a better and more confident pony overall as a result.

Wish I had friends like that; the ones I do have, I don't stay in contact with very often.

9573865
Indeed. If you want, I'll gladly be your friend.

Interesting story, thank you for writing. I'm sorry (what happened in the author's notes) happened to you.

I'm all for more autistic ponies around here. The story does make me wonder what care is like in Equestria. The sorts of discrimination unfortunately present among us pesty humans, that ugliness is hard to reconcile with Equestia's love and friendship, so I'd think outright rejection is unlikely. On the other hand, it's possible the average pony doesn't know much about autism, so even with no bad intentions there could be problems. (I've seen that plot device used to stir conflict for stories with trans characters.) Regardless of the resolution of the food for thought ... thank you for this story.

On that note -am I reading too much into this, or is Cinnamon also on the spectrum?

10183557
You're most welcome! Thank you for your sympathies and thoughtful commentary.

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