Bedtime Stories

by Incredible Blunderbolt

Munchies

Rustle rustle rustle...

Crunch crunch crunch...

Twilight lay shaking in her bed, eyes closed tight, pretending that the ominous noises coming from downstairs weren't there. She'd awoken about an hour ago to the sound of muffled thumps around where she judged the kitchen to be, and had grown steadily more concerned as the sounds persisted through the minutes. The noises were soft and light, but careless and disrespectful—like somepony who didn't want to be heard, but didn't particularly care what they broke, either.

Rustle rustle rustle...

Crunch crunch crunch...

At first, Twilight had thought that Spike had simply gotten hungry in the middle of the night, and had decided to go downstairs for a little snack, but soon remembered that Spike was spending the night at Rarity's after he'd helped her search for sapphires earlier. It couldn't be Owowliscious—her pet was almost certainly still out hunting for is breakfast. The noises were most certainly not of Twilight's making, so that left only one option: A...a... Twilight gulped and pulled the sheets over her head, still very much shaking. A break-in!

Rustle rustle rustle...

Crunch crunch crunch...

Twilight had read about break-ins. Heck, she'd studied Equestrian Law under the very mare who'd written it! She knew the reasons that they happened—poor ponies often needed money or food to simply survive—and that, statistically speaking, one in four houses in Equestria would be burgled per year, but she'd never expected that such a thing would happen to her!

Rustle rustle rustle...

Crunch crunch crunch...

Twilight bit her lip and blinked back a few nervous tears. Stay calm, Twilight! she reassured herself. Just stay calm and let them take what they want! Criminals generally don't turn violent unless they're put into situations where they feel threatened. Just stay where you are, and stay calm! A shadow darted across her room, and she nearly screamed before she realized that it was just coming from the bough of an outside tree in the moonlight.

Rustle rustle rustle...

Crunch crunch crunch...

The noises died down for a moment before the sound of something smashing the floor echoed up the stairs. "Aw, shoot!" came a voice that was definitely not Twilight's.

Thump, thump, thump...

Twilight's heart stopped as she realized that the rustling had died down, only to be replaced by the sounds of hoofsteps coming up the stairs! Suppressing a squeal of sheer terror, Twilight tunneled herself deeper into her bed and wished that her brother were there to help her. Shining Armor would certainly have never allowed somepony to scare his sister and ransack her house!

Thump, thump, thump...

The hoofsteps drew ever closer, and soon, Twilight could hear them just outside her door. They stopped just outside and, for a moment, everything went deathly quiet. Twilight bit her lip and hoped that the intruder would continue on down the hallway and raid her storage room instead.

Then, the door knob clicked.

Slowly, the door opened. A figure stepped inside her room, dragging a long cylinder behind it.

The burglar was a bit short, Twilight realized, and rather small looking, but way too wide to be anything that she could recognize. Certainly, if she had to, she could defend herself against such a criminal, but hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

Twilight covered her mouth with her hooves as the trespasser's eyes fell upon her bed. Gradually, the shadow neared her, breathing heavily.

As it got closer, the figure reached out to her lantern and flicked the flint fire-starter, flooding the room with light, and revealing the one face that Twilight had never expected to see on the pony who'd made her experience such terror.

"Heya, Twilight!" Rainbow Dash said cheerfully, a few sandy-colored seeds dropped from her muzzle to the floor. "Your snack-tube was empty, so I thought I'd fill it up for you, but, uh..." She held up Twilight's prized bird-feeder, now smashed beyond repair, and blushed. "By the way," she said, rubbing the back of her neck. "You're outta that awesome seed..."

Twilight grit her teeth and fought the urge to scream out every indignity in the Equestrian language—and several known only to griffons—at Rainbow Dash's infuriating antics. Then she noticed something. Uh, oh...

Dash's wings twitched. "So, uh, you lonely in that bed or what?" she asked, tossing the now-useless bird-feeder to the side and giving Twilight a wink.

Author's Note:

Prompt was "munchies."

As your can probably tell, this whole thing is a reference to Twilight's Birdfeeder. This was written partly because I love the fic and partly because I wanted something to laugh about. I'm not quite sure that I pulled it off exactly the way that I wanted to, though.

Also: the next mini-fic will NOT focus on TwiDash, like you guys wanted. However, I have no-idea what to write for it, since I get most of these ideas from the TwiDash Prompt Tag thread (fics preceding "Chocolate" exempted.) So go ahead and tell me what you'd like to see in the comments; I've already gotten asked for PinkieMac, Cadence and Shining Armor and the ever-vague "not TwiDash," but if you want, you can give me a single-word prompt, and I'll pick the one with the most thumbs.

Comments

[Karrakaz]

Twilestia ?

[Incredible Blunderbolt]

2218149

...:

I don't think I understand what you are trying to get at... Is it Spike? He's a child; someone his age would never be sent to war, unless their leader was a slave-driving tyrant...

[SgtFrog]

A fic about Derpy's glass eye! (Yes, I do subscribe to the headcanon that Derpy's wandering eyes are because one of them is a prosthetic that never seems to point in the right direction.)

[Desol]

Single word prompt? Ritual.

[Incredible Blunderbolt]

2219033
Nope, I remember the watermelon fic AND the refrigerator fic.

[Incredible Blunderbolt]

2219145

YOU are asking ME for AppleDash?

I'm not sure if I should be humbled, or if you just wanna see more AppleDash...

[GoG ToXiC]

Ants.

That is your prompt. Write something involving the most horrendous creatures to ever stalk the earth, preferably something that portrays them as the six-legged physical incarnations of evil that they really are.

[scootaloo_the_chicken]

PINKIEMAC PINKIEMAC PINKIEMAC
sorry. PinkieMac is just my absolute most favorite shipping...

[xBeeCharm]

Huh... coincidence that Twilight's Birdfeeder updated

[Hyzaku]

Just got linked to this. Dashie was so adorable.

Still totally shocked I actually inspired someone to write something. Almost feels like have a measure of skill.

Totally reading the rest of these now.

For a prompt: Twilight shipping. If I can't get more TwiDash, then I'll go for the next best thing TwiSomethinglivingthat'snotinherimediatefamily.. I know, I'm so picky.