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Rarity has been visiting Spike in his cave ever since he had to move out of Twilight's Library, due to his growth after his sixteenth birthday. They've been dating since then, and she's always been there for him, bringing him some of his favorite gems and keeping him company. This time though, she needs his help sending Princess Celestia a letter regarding the Element of Generosity.
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This is for all the Bronys who say that Rarity is the least representitive of her element just because she loves jewels and wants to be famous.
She's still a huge flirt with Spike though, I agree on that.
Guessing ur fav characcter is Spike?
869482
I look forward to the dramatic U-turn from "d'awww" to "ow-chika-bow-wow".
Sometimes generosity isn't materialistic like giving someone money or cloths. But giving them kindness, comfort, help when the time is needed.
A very nice story. I normally don't really care for Rarity x Spike, but I have always considered the fact that he might have a chance when they're older and the age difference doesn't matter as much.
Well written, and a nice little tidbit with the foal actually being Starswirl.
A fave and a like for you, good sir.
Surprisingly nice story, although it ended a little too anti-climatically and without any deeper reflection on Rarity's part.
One thing though. It's usually conventional when utilizing a very long quote (such as the story that Spike relates) that is split up into paragraphs that each paragraph starts with a quote mark. That confused me for a moment when trying to follow the story, I had little idea that Spike was still telling the story.
"Rarity, is this true? Is it in this bag?" He didn't wat for her to answer.
He wrapped her tighter in his arms and tried to comfort her, but se continued
Princess Celstia realized that the meaning behind her actions had been lost, so she moved the statue to her gardens.
~
Just a few grammar mistakes. Yeah, it was good. But..I dunno. Very anti-climatic. I'll read the sequel. You got a follow out of me, though. So yippee.
That is a very well crafted view of generosity. You sir have worked a masterpiece.
This was really good. However, how big is Spike compared to Rarity?
i dont think rarity isnt generous, i just think she's a drama queen
great story loved it!
870818
Yes, just look at my other story.
870822
There's more than one kind of Lust.
870835
I agree, that's why I chose the example of Fluttershy's modeling, Rarity gave advice and encouragement even though she was jealous
870923
Thank you very much, I don't particularly care for the pairing either, but that's probably because I like Rainbow Dash better.
I actually wrote that backstory as the reason Starswirl became so obsessed with magic and time travel (I've always figured that those who want to go back in time the most have the most regrets). Starswirl developed a huge case of Survivor's Guilt and dedicated his life to figuring out a way to go back and save the stallion, thus his research into magic and time travel that allowed Twilight Sparkle her Solid Snake/Terminator roleplaying.
871057
Hmm, well, most reflection would have been in her thoughts while Spike was talking, and I still don't like Rarity all that much.
Thanks for the information, quotations have been added. Edit: I just redid the ending while fixing the grammar, so see if that's better.
871254
Thank you, thank you and thank you. I didn't actually want to end this part of the story there, but if I moved on to explicit clop directly after all that fluff I felt as if it wouldn't fit together. I could put the clop in a new chapter instead of a new story if that would work better.
871285
My gratitude goes out to you. I had the feeling this would be well recieved.
871413
The same size as in the picture. He would be able to scoop her up with both of his claws, but her legs would stick out. It'll make writing the clop interesting to say the least.
871435
Now that you mention it, this was pretty Spike-centric and Rarity didn't have a whole lot of drama, other than trying to quit being the Element of Generosity. Thanks
871629 Ah. Yea, size differences can be such a bitch.
Also, so the Unicorn that helped the foal and the Earth pony was older Starswirl using the time travel spell to attempt to save them both. Nice little twist there, but without the comment I probably wouldn't of figured it out.
871700
i3.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/008/549/If%20you%20know%20what%20I%20mean..png
I hoped someone would get that, I just can't resisting putting things like that into my stories. I'm always hoping that will give it that little extra zest it needs to be featured.
871711 It is a nice little Easter egg. Sparity fics rarely get featured out of the gate; however, they do seem to have a high update feature rate I've noticed.
871858
I'm going to delete all the non-story related comments now, I don't want this turned into a blog thread.
871861 Solid plan. Have you decided if you're going to make it a new chapter or a new story for the next part by the way?
That is one effing cute picture
871876
This will remain the cutest pic ever in my book:
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5o4rq6fzS1rqvvxno1_500.jpg
872288
Thanks, I was hoping a comfort story with a little sad mini story thrown in would work out.
Where are they? Could you please point them out so I can fix them?
This is a very nice little story. I like the short inner story very much. It's put together in a very nice way and has a very clear purpose, which is always good. So, good job!
There are some random errors in it, but they're not distracting.
872828
I'm glad you like the storyception, I was a little afraid people would say it was off-track or something. Could you please copy/paste the errors into a comment so I can fix them? I've reread it a couple time now for editing and such, but I don't see anymore errors. I'm probably fixing them in my head as I read, like I normally do.
872884 That's what I was doing too. I can pick them out for you though:
"ressonated"
"immediatelty "
"drakness "
"Whas"
"sligtly"
"thouroughly"
872899
Thanks! Fixing...Done.
It is a good story I admit. However the entire relationship between Rarity and Spike is hardly explored at all. The story of Courage though a good one was a rather shift and you don't have much to tell the difference between this story and the story being told in this story... if you get what I mean.
Your view as to why Rarity is the Element of Generosity is a good one, though I'm surprised that Spike read it... and he hadn't sent a friendship report for sometime.
The story has a good concept, but the execution of it leaves much to be desired. The flow of the story seems to come in bursts/stages if you get my meaning there and there is a lot of loose elements that raises many questions without many answers. Plus everything was resolved too quickly for my tastes. I believe Rarity should of spent some more time thinking about things though after hearing the story from Spike.
... Oh Zecora? Back in the time of Starswirl? That's a rather large and glaring mistake.
873335
Congratulations on being the first to notice that Zecora was in the story. What book(s) would you like Twilight to bring to Rainbow Dash and Spike while they are in the hospital in "The Life of a Dragon"? I'll be sure to include at least one of them.
That's because the story isn't about their relationship. How they got together is left to the imagination of the reader while I focus on this one point in their relationship.
I'm not sure about the flow of the story, it basically goes like this:
Rarity gets there, asks Spike to send a letter, he opens it do to curiosity, they talk a little about her wanting to quit being the EoG, Spike's tells a story to show overcoming problems (fear, greed, etc.) are what virtues are about, Spike explains his view on what Generosity means, kissy faces.
It flows well to me and nopony else has complained so far. If you give some suggestions, I'll see what I can do to fit them in though.
As for how fast it was resolved, how long does it normally take to change someponys mind? Just as long as it takes to find the right words.
873410
Uh... I'll get back to you on that one (Is Life of a Dragon Dash-Spike shipping BTW?)
Perhaps it isn't about their relationship, but some better clues or ideas about their relationship would make things a lot easier to understand. Honestly I had no idea about their relationship at the begging and almost none at the end.
The flow of the story isn't the order of scenes and what the scenes are, its the transition between them... and personally I can't feel that. You just seem to jump from one to the other, without much connecting them. There isn't any build up or hints as to what might happen next, it just... happens.
Suggestions.... maybe Rarity shows a bit of nervousness before or during her request for Spike to send the scroll, which then can lead give him a better reason to read it over simply curiosity. The talk of how Rarity feels that she doesn't deserve to be the EoG is very short before Spike's story appears, so that could be lengthened with Spike trying and failing to comfort her before remembering the story. As for the story itself well I think Rarity should be a little confused and reluctant to hear it at first and when the story is being told you separate from the rest of the story using a break/scene change and do something like put it into italics. After the story there is the talk about vitrues being overcoming the problems with Rarity still unsure about it, so Spike urges her to think about it. As something as big as that isn't decided in an instant. It takes a lot of thought and soul searching. Oh and please don't have Rarity think about one thing then Spike bring that up right away, its very jarring and feels wrong.
873458
Yes
Hmm, I don't want to add too much to the beginning of the story, it is a one-shot, but if I add something in the description of the story about them getting together and stuff would that work?
Well, I'll try and add in the nervousness about sending the letter, as well as her trying to get Spike to send the letter a little more forcefully before she hears the story. I'll also try for some more thoughts on Rarity's part after the story, but I'm not very good at that kind of writing. I would try and seperate the story more, but as you can see in one of the previous comments, some people already had trouble knowing that Spike was telling the story.
873513
Adding it to the description feels cheap to me...
Separating the story being told from this story should make it clearer to tell he his telling a story.
871629
Yo Bro I faved that story and Im watching you. Nuff Said, k thx.
872032 Good call.
873833
Your welcome.
873844
Can I haz RainbowSpike clop dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Spike_lolface.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Rainbow_Dash_lolface.png
873853
That's going to be awhile, I still have to catch back up to Elise asking Rarity to the Gala, then the Gala itself, then Spike and Rainbow Dash have to start hanging out, then date, then CLOP CLOP CLOP CLOP. For now, go read Xenophilia for some RD clop.
873869
Read my story cuz I am also starting a RainbowSpike clop dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/lolface_Celestia.png
874000
It's okay, somepony listed a few of them already, so those were probably fixed. Though I did do some editing to the beginning if you care to reread that.
spike got all "gandalf wise man" in a short period of time
important thing you missed though
DOES HE STILL LIKE MUSTACHES?
874375
Somedrake has to be the man in that relationship, and it certainly won't be Rarity.
How could you think otherwise?
Great job, With bot the characters as well as the story. In both what happens in the chapter as well as the story Spike tells Rarity.
Keep up the great work and i can not wait to see what else you write.
874693
Thank you very much, did you happen to notice the Easter Egg in the Starswirl story? 871700 Did.
874714 No I did not... but now I do.
I think I enjoyed the Starswirl bits more than the actual story, to be honest.
Spike goes all Yoda on Rarity, and he's supposed to be like 16? I don't buy it, really. 16 year-old boys are stupid, hormonal, and egotistical-- not wise. I would know, I was one. As far as size difference goes, I'm guessing that he's in one of his growth incarnations that we saw in "secret of my excess", but not a huge one. If they're still size-compatible to "kiss thoroughly", I'm guessing that he's gained enough height to make it hard for him to get in the door, is all.
I'm a little head-scratchy about Rarity and her element-- but no more so than Applejack or Rainbow Dash. Applejack is a proven, chronic (TERRIBLE) liar in several episodes-- and Rainbow Dash has all the jadedness to match hers to portray the element of (brutal) honesty. I've never really questioned Rarity's element before, though (her intentions may come across as controlling or overbearing, she does mean well).
877307
I enjoyed it more than the original story as well, I like describing the stallions fears and him overcoming them a great deal.
Well, as a "baby" dragon he was raised by Twilight and grew up in a library, so him picking up some intellectual traits from her and the books he probably reads when he's bored (and not helping Rarity) isn't too much of a stretch, right?
I tried to describe him as the size in the cover picture I used for my story, but his size while raiding Sweet Apple Acres, or the next one after that works as well.
I'm glad I put a new thought in your head, that's what the point of this whole story was.
Also, thanks for the watch. I'll try not to dissapoint.
So..many feels!
893614
Yay! I caused people to have emotions and feel alive, my life is awesome now.
This story is so sweet. The thing I don't understand is how Spike is 16 and still so wise. All of the other teenage dragons are just Cranky-Doodle-Donkey holes. Oh Spike, you're the most interesting dragon in Equestria.
871997 ... N... Neh... IT'S SO CUTE!!!!
Fluttershy is the only pony capible of carrying this ammount of cute.
934553
Well, I blame Spikes wisdom on being raised by a Librarian/Scientist (Twilight Sparkle) and being taught by her as he grows up. I find that I tend to take after some of my parents traits/habits so I thought it would be reasonable for him to start being more interested in books/science/math/etc. than dragons raised in the wild, surrounded by other guys(huge factor), and having no access to books or other learning materials.
869482Another another!
1311439
WoW wiki Soon
1313551YAY!
1313593
You didn't google that, I know because otherwise you wouldn't be saying yay.