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Chapter 1: A Startling Announcement4,267 words
Chapter 2: An Uncomfortable Meeting2,909 words
Chapter 3: A Tragic Realisation2,401 words
Chapter 4: A Final Decision2,958 words
Chapter 5 Part 1: A Talk Between Friends2,070 words
Chapter 5 Part 2: A Filly's Reaction2,700 words
Chapter 6: An Adoptee's Rage3,095 words
Chapter 7 Part 1: A Devious Proposition2,562 words
Chapter 7 Part 2: A Cunning Contract3,223 words
Chapter 8 Part 1: A Third Signature2,334 words
Chapter 8 Part 2: The Custody Begins2,609 words
Chapter 9 Part 1 Wakey Wakey2,337 words
Chapter 9 Part 2: What's In A Name?2,253 words
Chapter 10 Part 1: My Way Or The Highway1,811 words
Chapter 10 Part 2: A Very Awkward Meal2,581 words
Chapter 11 Part 1 Progress (Or Something Like It)1,890 words
Chapter 11 Part 2: Eating Out Leads To...2,168 words
Chapter 12 Part 1: Common Ground1,617 words
Chapter 12 Part 2: Separate Lives1,371 words
Chapter 13 Part 1: Conversations1,789 words
Chapter 13 Part 2: A Simple Request1,446 words

Chapter 6: An Adoptee's Rage

The stand-off began in earnest. It was a tense one for sure, as neither one of the sharp (tongued) shooters involved wanted to give an inch. Whoever was eventually declared the winner in this thrilling contest of nerves would be a worthy victor indeed.

What made the final outcome extra spicy was the fact that the two defiant protagonists were none other than mother (at least, until a few hours ago) and daughter. Both were incredibly strong-willed, stubborn, spirited ponies of the highest calibre and there seemed to be a very real danger that either could burn a hole in the other's retina with little added effort.

Eventually though, all tough competitions must come to a grinding halt, and with her eyes watering freely in a room full of absorbed spectators including a princess, Spoiled decided it might be time to concede. Or, as she preferred to put it, change her tactics. This wasn't a case of trying to save face, not at all. She was simply being the bigger pony by concluding things in a more refined fashion.

"Diamond..." she clenched her teeth together into a forced grin, while indicating to the company around her. "I don't know if you've realised this dear, but we have guests. I'm quite sure they didn't travel all this way to witness a mere child such as yourself openly disrespecting their mother in this manner, when we have such important matters to discuss. Sit back down darling, you're embarrassing yourself."

"Embarrassing mysel... what?!" The audacity of the older mare's claim caused Diamond to be the one who blinked first, but frankly she wasn't even bothering to keep score. "The only one 'embarrassing' themselves here is you, 'mother'! Do you ever even listen to half the stuff that comes out of your mouth?! And, to think I used to follow your every instruction without fail while looking up to you as a good parental figure. Thank goodness I finally saw the light..."

"If by 'saw the light' you mean 'let yourself get manipulated off your esteemed pedestal by a bunch of lower-class noponies' darling, then you and I are in complete agreement." Spoiled humphed, before kneeling down to the filly's level to address her in a tone that she thought was very motherly. "Whatever happened to us, My Diamond? We used to be so close... I would give you the best advice I could muster, and you would rush out and enact it straight away. You used to rule the school, and as head of the board there I 'overlooked' your numerous indiscretions in return for your unquestioned loyalty. Those were heady days indeed, my darling, and I remember them oh-so-fondly. But now, now..."

Spoiled then really turned on the waterworks to maximum output, spouting so many fake tears that even a crocodile would've turned away in disgust. She had her eyes scrunched up extremely tightly to complete the illusion that she was a mare on the edge, so she couldn't survey the no doubt devastated reaction from the others present in the room, but she was sure that even at this preliminary stage of her 'breakdown' she was winning hearts and minds to her cause. It's time to step up my game, a little more of this sensationalist melodrama and I'll have them eating out of the keratin in my hoof.

"... N-Now, it's like I don't even recognise who you are anymore! You return from school, telling me about how you rolled in mud with those heathens who took you away from me, and it's all I can do to run outside with my hooves in my ears to stop the mental torture from spreading! You describe your new relationship with that four-eyed grey filly as if you are true equals, even though you know her family has less than a tenth of the Rich's wealth! Also, whatever happened to that lifelong mantra I taught you early on... 'Treat 'Em Mean, Keep 'Em Keen'? Has all we ever had been lost forever, as the result of a single ill-advised afternoon trip to a treehouse on the day after your failed election? I-I just want my daughter back, the one I raised almost single-hoofedly after her irresponsible father has spent the best part of the last decade globetrotting around instead of helping raise his family the way he should. T-The one I sacrificed day after day tirelessly training to be my successor, but now seems in very real danger of turning into just another imbecilic moron who fritters away all of her privilege on the undeserved. A-And the one I cry over every single night, worrying into the wee small hours about her future since she mistakenly cast out my sage life-lessons and decided to heed the words of equine trash instead. W-Whatever the nasty unicorn pretender tells you, never forget this: I'm your real mother, who will care for you and support you endlessly, that soppy stallion over there, for better or for worse, is your real father, and nothing that a simple biology test could prove will ever change that fact."

Mascara running everywhere like greyish drizzle. Enough protracted sobs to make you think she's drowning. Such a tour de force of powerful acting, it's amazing she hadn't been snapped up by a talent agency already. At least, that was the utterly unbiased personal review Spoiled gave of her own stunning performance.

When she eventually stopped the histrionics and peeked between her tears though, to see what the great unwashed thought of her scripted rendition of the tragic victim of all this chicanery, there wasn't a mildly damp eye in the house. In fact, and this was so unexpected she had to rub her eyes twice just to be absolutely positive she wasn't seeing things, those clueless philistines seemed even angrier than they were before Spoiled's blubbering affectation. Even Filthy had ceased his petty whining and now saw fit to stare at his wife with the intensity of Celestia's sun, all grief in his expression lost for the sheer contempt he now held in his face for her.

Completely flabbergasted by this somewhat lukewarm reaction to her debut, Spoiled couldn't help but garble on incoherently as her jaw neatly hit the floor. " I-I d-don't u-understand... I-I d-don't..."

"It's okay 'mother', I don't blame you for not understanding such basic values as decency and humility. After all, it's not like you've demonstrated any knowledge of them since I came into your possession. Anyway, on that note, I think it's about time I said my piece."

Her mask of amiability now having slipped completely, Spoiled could only stay seated mannequin-like as her 'daughter' stood up on her hind legs, leaning against the older mare's paralysed form while addressing her directly. This was less a gesture of affection though than a sign of intent, to emphasise just how much Diamond believed what she was about to say and how they'd be no weaselling out this time by the slippery adult.

"First of all, please don't insult my friends like that. Those 'imbeciles' you seem to loathe so much are actually some of the most well-respected, popular fillies in all of Equestria, let alone Ponyville. The way they helped me and so many other lost ponies discover their true destiny has given them worldwide fame, something you might know if you picked up a copy of a newspaper once in a while instead of languishing around the spa all day, having various body parts covered in gunk which is just as 'disgusting' as the mud I roll in. I dare say they'd even help you out with your unknown mark, if you were a little nicer to them. Also, have you even seen the new, improved Foal Free Press? It's been going from strength to strength ever since my awful tenure there, under the fine management of Featherweight. That's his name, by the way... and my other friends happen to be called Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo and Silver Spoon. You seem to have a real problem with remembering who they are don't you, and just homing in on their most negative feature. That's something you're going to have to work on, I think. Mind you, to give you some credit, others have the same problem. In fact, just in class the other day, Snips mistakenly referred to you as 'that big nosed old bore you have living with you who won't shut up about herself'. I quickly corrected him of course, but I'm beginning to regret having done so now."

Stung by her 'daughter's' insolence, yet seemingly unable to put together a legible response in her head, Spoiled glowered down at the pink filly while testing out the bounds of her own extensive vocabulary. "Y-You... Y-You..."

"See, there you go again... forgetting your own child's name. I'm 'Diamond Tiara', in case your memory's playing tricks on you once more. Another thing that seems to have lapsed from your mind is that I'm my own filly. Not your lackey, not your underling, and most definitely not your clone, thank goodness. I think I'd rather take a bracing dip in the pits of Tartarus than grow up to be cast in your image. I think the reason I now spend most of my time outside this mansion and with the Crusaders is because I'm so grateful to them for having saved me from a fate worse than extra sprouts for lunch. Oh, by the way I should mention... they've just elected me club president. While I'm not an official member per say, it does mean that I'll be utilising my once misused abilities of organisation and leadership to help other fillies and colts out in my position from now on. We might even hold some meetings here sometimes, that treehouse can get a bit chilly in the evening. Who'd have thought it? The symbol I was so confused by and ashamed of for so long actually doing some good. And it took a 'brainless bumpkin', a 'tuneless singer' and a 'helpless cripple' to help me realise that. Unbelievable."

Quite unable to pierce any holes in Diamond's intolerable tirade, Spoiled did something she sought out very rarely indeed: Her husband's help. "Well, are you going to just sit there cross-eyed while our out-of-control child rips me to shreds?! When are you going to stand up and be a real stallion, you..."

"Looks like old habits die hard with you, 'mother'." Diamond shook her head sadly at what she now saw was an ongoing problem of name recognition. "You're either going to call him a 'waste of space', a 'pathetic shell of a pony' or just plain 'worthless'. And you wonder why my Daddy is always so nervous around you, why he rushes off first thing in the morning before even having his coffee so he won't have to endure your constant insults. It's amazing he has any self-confidence at all, seeing as you've made it your life's mission to demoralise him at every turn. Or throw his money away on stupid things, I mean, come on now... who needs a hundred silken hoof warmers in the middle of Summer?! Seriously. 'Filthy Rich' is who he is, he's built Barnyard Bargains up into the most successful business in the world, and he's my Daddy that I love with all my heart and soul. I'd say he deserves more, much more, than being reduced to the status of 'whipped mule' or 'bottomless wallet'. The only reason he's been away so much, is because he has to work so darn hard to fund your massively expensive lifestyle. Perhaps, if you weren't so unhappy and unfulfilled with your own shallow existence, that you constantly feel the need to bring down others to your pathetically low level of materialism and selfishness, you'd see all the good he's put back into the community around here and how beloved it's made him. The only aspect of my Daddy that baffles most ponies though, is: 'What made him marry that gold-digging mare in the first place?' I have to say, to all intents and purposes, I draw a blank on that one, too."

By now, Spoiled was visibly quivering in her chair, the sheer force of her 'daughter's' words penetrating every sinew of her shaken being. The haughtiness was gone, the pretentiousness had vanished, and all that remained was a gasping, grasping, nervous wreck... to such an extent that even Twilight almost felt obligated to step in, to stop the pink filly from shattering the older mare's psyche entirely. The alicorn had never seen this day coming in a million years... the day she felt a microcosm of sympathy for Spoiled Rich.

Diamond wasn't quite done yet though, and saved her most scathing remarks until last. "I have to admit, I'm still reeling from this whole 'you're not my mother' thing, but mainly because it's such a surprise, not because I'm sad. It's an entirely different story with Daddy of course, and me and him will probably have a good cry about it later wrapped in each other's hooves. As far as you're concerned though... I'm struggling to see who'd be the worse parent. Somepony who dumped me as a foal into the custody of a total stranger, or a mother who seems to have done everything possible to make me as miserable as she is. Who knows, maybe I would have been better off with the 'certifiable basket case'."

And with those festering final remarks, Diamond turned with intentional nonchalance to trot leisurely back into the comparatively warm bosom of her 'father's' embrace, who now'd recovered completely from his earlier despondency and gazed at his little girl with as much bursting pride as he ever had. As for the others who'd watched this fascinating spectacle unfold with increasingly widened eyes, a conflicted Twilight was struggling to hold back the ghost of a smile, while it was all Starlight could do to stop herself from seizing up her birth filly with magic once more, and hug her tightly as she whispered in her ear "That's my girl".

Returning to Spoiled, and to say she was 'on the ropes' would be a gross understatement of the truest facts. Ego shot to smithereens, self-worth almost crumbled to dust, for the first time in eons she was actually beginning to doubt herself, as unfamiliar and unwelcome questions began to permeate the inner sanctum of her mind.

I-Is that all I am? A freeloader? A leech? A hypocrite? A 'drain on society' with no unique characteristics of her own, a charge which I'm constantly accusing other, less affluent ponies of? How could I have ever stooped so low? Oh Celestia, I hate feeling this way. This is all the fault of that meddling unicorn, who just had to reenter the picture when everything was going so swimmingly. After everything I did for her and her screaming, incontinent little brat. Talk about ingratitude. Why, I oughta...

Suddenly, the nefarious gears of Spoiled's labyrinthine mind began turning once more even in the midst of her uncomfortable bout of soul-searching, and soon her brief soliloquy was all but totally gone. In its place, a dastardly scheme quickly began to unravel in her head: One so cunning and ruthless in its inception that even her teeth were itching at the prospect of exposing it to the world. She'd have to be tread with caution though, because otherwise...

"Oh Diamond, honey..." just as the pink filly was a few merciless inches away from plopping herself back down on her welcoming 'Daddy's' lap, her ears pricked up at the sound of Spoiled addressing her once more. "Could you come back here for a minute please, sweetums? Mummy has a very special proposal she wants to put to you."

"I've already said all I want to say to you..." Diamond had evidently decided that her 'mother's' broken authority and selfish desires were no longer worth her time, and prepared to jump onto Filthy's chair without any further delay. "I have nothing else to add."

"Oh, but you see that's what I want to talk to you about. You're absolutely, one hundred per cent certain that there's nothing you'd like to take back from that unhinged bout of rambling you inflicted on us all just now?"

"Nothing whatsoever. Why is it so important to you, anyway?"

"Because, darling..." and at this point the trademark Spoiled Rich smirk finally made it's non-awaited reappearance. "Based on what you've just told me, I have a deal I want to strike with you. One which even Filthy, with all of his laudable business savvy, might find hard to match."

"I'm quite sure that anything you could concoct would have far too many strings attached, and be loaded with your own self-interest at heart, so no thanks."

"Ah, but you don't know what you'll get if you 'win', though. How does this sound: I shall get a straight divorce from your father, with no needs for lawyers or any of that courtroom malarkey. I'll just go back to live with my folks in Fillydelphia to help out with the diary, as mortifying as that would be. So, how d'ya like the sound of that?"

If the phrase 'knock me down with a feather' held any weight, somepony had just thrown an entire pillow at Diamond. "W-What?!"

"It gets better..." Spoiled chuckled in amusement at the pink filly's stunned response. "I won't even ask for a final settlement. I'll just leave Rich Mansion without a bit to my name, and that'll be that. So, do you wish to know more about what I'm suggesting, dear?"

Diamond however was still recovering from the mere thought of her 'mother' making such a wild proposition in the first place, and could only yelp out 'W-W-What?!" repeatedly as a refrain, albeit at an increasingly higher volume.

Unable to derive much sense from her astonished 'daughter', Spoiled instead looked past the shocked faces of Starlight and Twilight to zoom in on her hubby instead.

"So, Filthy. As sad as it will be for us to part ways, I can see the only way out of this tragic conundrum is for me to be the better pony and embark on this gamble to save our family from utter destruction. So, how about it, then?"

She needn't have bothered speaking to him though, as he was in no fit state to reply to anypony. The clue was in his drooped figure, dangling lifelessly halfway off his chair.

For Filthy Rich had fainted dead away.

Author's Note:

Well, what do you know. I wasn't going to update this story for another week or so... then, I fell out of bed this morning (ouch) with fresh inspiration, and decided to type it all out before it disappeared altogether. Hope you like the fruits of my labour...