• Member Since 14th Feb, 2015
  • offline last seen March 14th



Being the Princess of Love has grown tiresome for Princess Cadance. She used to enjoy helping bring two ponies together, but lately, ponies have just expected her to help. She feels used and abused - her job seems more of a burden than talent.

After a final unwarranted incident (and one too many drinks), Cadance decides to ship at will... Her will, that is.

Audio reading by Agent Fluffy!

Edited and proofread by Deshlune

Featured 4/17-19/17

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 54 )

:pinkiecrazy: LET THE CRAZY BEGIN!

:pinkiegasp: HEY......Why did Cadance ship all those other ponies, I didn't get shipped with anypony.

Pinkie stop breaking the fourth wall please, I loved this story myself and thought it was quite funny, though I got to admit that I'm a little shocked that you didn't have Cadance do a ship with Pinkie with any stallion.

8100663 she wasn't shipped because I was hiding to make sure I wasn't shipped

8100663 Least Cadence didn't ship you with sweets or party decorations Pinkie.

:applejackconfused: spike
:rainbowderp: spike
:raritystarry: Spike?
:twilightoops: SPIKE!
:pinkiehappy: Doomie!
:flutterrage: Angel Bunny
:unsuresweetie: spike?
:applecry: spike
:scootangel: Rainbow
:trixieshiftleft: Glim Glam
:trollestia: cake
:derpytongue2: Another house call!
:moustache: A hot dog?

And then Celestia gave Cadence a time out in the moon.

Joe and a doughnut


Oh does this remind me of a joke by one Jackie Martling.

Anyone wanna hear it?

Chamomile tea.

Y'know, I've read a bunch of fics recently where characters drink tea, and it's always Chamomile (One fic that I remember reading recently was Evil is Easy, Governing is Harder for example). What's so special about Chamomile anyways? Google tells me it's good for upset stomachs and as a sleeping aid, but it doesn't seem like it's used for that as much.

This was a great fic BTW. Super funny, especially with Discord & Celestia.

Not often do I get a fic that contains incest, foalcon, bestiality, interspecies and dubcon all in one fic.

Especially without any actual sex!

Good job.

poor, furry face is wet, slobbery kisses.

*eye twitches*

But...but...the story of Nightmare Heart must continue!!

8101616 it good but besides that it's a nice mild sweet tea thats calming, it's a good tea for relaxing

Alright, thanks. I don't know why teas like lavender or peppermint aren't used because apparently they do the same thing, but ok.

Imma guess something to do with cream filling?


Ooh, I should fix that.


Heh. Thanks. I take pride in my atrocious literary work. :pinkiecrazy:

8102916 It actually doesn't. Shokingly. Donut sex joke? That screams cream filling punchline

And the shipping continues!! *dramatic music*

:pinkiegasp: AHHHH

Too bad Cheese Queen wasn't there.

This reminds me of that one Discord Tales thing on Youtube where the alicorn princesses were voiced by dudes.

And that's how Cadence got herself banished to the moon!

Your indentation is so uneven.... I'm going to die of un-even-ness

Guess I missed that... whoops. :twilightsheepish:

You had me at the name of the story, I was already chuckling when I saw the chapter name, and I almost lost it while reading this story. Then I did lose it when I got to the end. Good job :rainbowlaugh:

And in the following year the number of genetic disorders seen by doctors rose drastically. And the birth of outright chimeras, for that matter. :pinkiesmile:

Where did you even get that cover image?


A very dark place on the internet.



Please please write a sequel or epilogue just to see the reactions of everypony shipped.

For Cadance, the was a great opportunity to step up her game. Twilight had no clue about the earlier events, so this would be all too easy.

Wrong word.

Cadance had confided in her sister-in-law that she was having troubles with her talent, and that she'd likely be taking a break if the trend continued.

But didn't she just tell Shining she could never take a break?

Shining snorted. "You and I both no there's no truth in that.


That being said, I'd also love to see some fallout from this.

/clears throat
Flutter did you not fix "Know/No"? If it was pointed out, then that means you didn't... aw well.

Thanks for pointing those two things out, while I know one of those were found... I can't be certain about the other. Too many notes, not very organized. But anyway, hope you at least enjoyed it.

As for you two. You have greatly gone off course from the subject of the story, but for why I've tagged you. What is this "Tinder" you speakith of?


I did fix it, but I guess it didn't show up in the story. I had to unpublish and republish it.

Yeah that happens. After the publication of a chapter it is "locked" and any edits made after won't show up. To have it "unlock" just unpublish the chapter and, naturally like you did, republish the chapter. But the republish "locks" the chapter again. So if you notice the word counts between Story and Chapter don't match just do that, it only breaks site rules if you delete the chapter and make it again(or so I've been told).
Also I sent you corrections on chapter one, I don't know if you saw that yet...

Great story, had me laughing throughout.

I'm really hoping Shining doesn't make Cadance change FancyFilth back. A) because Filthy Rich deserves better and B) now she's got me shipping it, darn it!


I have seen the suggestions​. Sorry. I haven't gotten around to adding them yet. Thank you for your hard work. :twilightsmile:


I'm quite pleased you enjoyed it.:pinkiesmile:


Let the shipfics begin!:trollestia:

But I may take up your advice, and from now on, I'll inform the client of my abilities and inabilities beforehand, so as to not end up in the same situa--

Shouldn't that be "beforehoof"?

Discord shook his head and turned to Celestia. "Have I ever told you that I find your ass delectable?"

Celestia frowned. "I don't have a donkey, and frankly your term for one is quite offensive."

Luna cleared her throat purposefully. "Sister, I believe he was referring to your hindquarters, if I'm not mistaken."

"Ah. Very well then. Discord, have at it."

The utter calmness I imagine her saying this with made my fucking day, I almost keeled over in laughter.


Heh. Glad you enjoyed it. :twilightsmile:

Realy funny, indeed and slightly cloppy ^^

Ponies gone crazy!

"But wait! He's my--" the Mare's response was cut short by an amorous stallion jumping her.

I feel as if I don't want to know what she was going to say. Something tells me, it's better that way.

Anyway, this was a laugh riot. Good show, good show!


Well the title does give some warning. :rainbowkiss:

He sighed and gazed down at the bottle in is lap. "Better not waste this," he said, pouring himself a hefty glassful.

Me: (pours glass) “Well here we go.”

"But wait! He's my--" the Mare's response was cut short by an amorous stallion jumping her.

Crap... incest... (shudder)

Hi there! I did a fanfic reading of your story! The cast and I had a lot of fun doing your story! :pinkiehappy:
Youtube Reading


Oh wow! Awesome possum! :pinkiegasp:

Thanks so much for doing an audio reading of this story! I appreciate the attention and I absolutely love the reading!

"And it's like they don't even listen to me! I repeat myself​ many times, and they continue to demand the impossible! It's so frustrating!" Cadance took a deep breath, and a drink of her tea, slamming it down on the table, startling her hubby. "I almost don't want to help the next pony in line."

god irl lol

The stallion waved her off dismissively. "Forget it! I knew you'd say that! Why can't you just help us the way we want to be helped?" He huffed and turned away, leaving the restaurant just as the waitress came with the tea pitcher.

God be like bruh

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