• Published 2nd Mar 2017
  • 1,940 Views, 163 Comments

Hard To Find The Right Words - Nameless Narrator



There are thousands of stories about changelings lost and broken after the explosion ending the invasion of Canterlot. After all, there were thousands of changelings caught in it. Some found love or peace, and some found death. I'm just one of many.

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Admission

[Attention all passengers: We have arrived at the Upper Canterlot station-]

“Careful, Fury. Steps down.”

“Yeah, yea- aaaaa?! Phew, thanks for the quick grab. These aren’t steps, these are craters leading into the abyss.”

“I didn’t hear you complain when getting onto the train.”

“Then you weren’t listening hard enough, Crest.”

*Clink clank clink clank.* *Swish.*

“Commander, we have company.”

“Common Crest, chief of Riverside police?”

“Whoah, that guy sounds super cereal.”

“Fury, I’d reign down that tongue of yours for a moment. There’s a dozen of heavily armed Royal Guards pointing their spears at you.”

“I didn’t know I was THAT hot, but it makes sense.”

“Celestia-damn it!”

“We are here to detain the changeling and escort you to the castle immediately.”

“No.”

“Boss?”

“Commander?”

“Crest?”

“I said no. She’s coming with me. If she’s to be imprisoned then thesame goes for me. She might be a changeling, but I’m a murderer.”

“Hey, guardponies, punch him for me, please.”

“Silence, changeling.”

“You can take my life, but you can’t take my tongue. I should know, I did some fun throat stuff to you during the invasion.”

“...aaaaa- I r-r-r-remember her, she-”

“Heeeey, I recall that voice. Last time I heard you, you were swearing undying loyalty to me as long as I didn’t stop. Heh heh heh.”

“Corporal Strike?”

“She hypnotized me!”

“I didn’t have to try too hard, to be honest. Eeeeh, you guards were fun. Good times, good times.”

“Common Crest, you have no authority here. The royal orders are to-”

*Click.*

“Crest, leave the shackles for later. I have some ideas.”

“Here, umm, sargeant. Now I’m shackled to her. I’m not letting her out of my sight.”

*Audible facepalm. Armored horseshoe on steel helmet.*

“While I appreciate the gesture, Crest, I’m already having trouble walking. If I have to move for ten minutes tied to you I’ll kill you, no hard feelings. Now stop being my knight in shining armor and get the shackles off.”

“Well, Fury, I… didn’t have the time to take the key with me from Riverside.”

“Hey, armored lunchbags, if you get him away from me I promise I’ll do a flip when you throw me down the mountain.”

“Hey, what are you-”

*Bzzt!* *Clink.*

“I thought the standard-issue shackles were resistant to magic, Commander.”

“Royal Guard unicorns learn an emergency spell to unlock any type of standard police restraint in case it’s used against them. Now if you please stop this and come with us…?”

“You saved me from Crest, I’ll follow you to Tartarus and back, armored lunch.”

“I’d really feel better is she was in chains.”

“Sargeant, she’s blind and she can barely move. Palisade here has been carrying her around whenever it was necessary.”

“And few times when it wasn’t. Her back is awfully comfy.”

“So are your belly and forelegs. I noticed you rubbing my chest a lot.”

“Muscular but squish pony - best pony.”

“I do my best to stay in shape.”

“QUIET! Must you do this all the time?”

“Yes, Crest. That’s the best part of my charm.”

“Nah, I’d go with the holes, and I’m not talking about-”

“Shut up, Palisade. You too, Fury. Commander, will you?”

“Thanks, Bladehoof. So, ehm, this is how things are. Please, lead us away, but I will object heavily if you split us up. We need to inform anypony in charge of the Riverside rescue operation.”

“There is more going on than you know, but if you are intent on staying with the changeling, then so be it.”

“Should we check them for mind control?”

“Do it on the way.”

“Let me inform you, sargeant, that we’ve all been repeatedly fed on by Fury and might contain traces of changeling venom.”

“If I had to rank them from the tastiest to the least, I’d say- ow! That’s gonna leave a mark!”

“Good, now you have a cutie mark of Bladehoof’s horseshoe on you ass. You’re finally a real pony.”

“Heh, got you, Crest!”

“What?”

“I’ll let you stew and figure it out.”

“Come oooon, I know you love to gloat.”

“You know me so well. That’s why you’re in my top three most favourite lunchboxes.”

“Top three?”

“I’m not good at picking favourites. Jokes aside, Crest, I got you. You’re not so brooding anymore.”

“I know what you’re doing.”

“Talking, Crest. Talking is all I can do now. Fortunately, it’s enough to take your mind off of certain things.”

“...”

“Fury?”

“Yes, my faithful steed?”

“Please, stop calling me that. The guards have flying carriages here and we can’t all fit into one.”

“Crest and I into one. You two into the other.”

“Why is the changeling-”

“Shut up, guard, or I swear to whatever star is keeping me alive I will fill your ass full of eggs faster than you can say broodmother! We escaped damn Chrysalis herself, and we’re here to help you save some ponies who will after what happened probably hate my kind even more now, but we’re still here. So shut up, chain and muzzle me if you need to, but let Crest hold my fucking hoof the whole way!”

“...you didn’t have to make me sound like some weakling, Fury...”

“Sargeant?”

“Corporal, the police chief and the changeling are coming with me and Crusher in the first one. You and Stunning go in the second. Pegasi are on the watch around. Move.”

“Yes, sir!”

“See, Crest? There’s a pony you can learn a lot from.”

“I’m not one to yell.”

“You can threaten quietly. I’ll give you a quick course if you want.”

“Careful, high step. The carriage is right in front of you.”

“Hmm, not much room, but being sandwiched between you and a muscular guard does have its charm. I have some suggestion for improvement. First, the guard takes his armor off-”

“I don’t find you threatening or attractive, changeling. My duty is to get you to the castle dungeons for question- get that foreleg away from my shoulders before I’m forced to pacify you.”

“Crest, he’s mean to me.”

“He’s supposed to. Did you forget that you were kept with us based on false orders?”

“Huh, yeah, actually, I did. So… these guys-”

“The REALLY have no reason to like you.”

“Hey, guard, don’t you want to tap this?”

“Fury, stop wiggling your butt in a small, open, flying carriage.”

“I’d tap you only with a hammer, changeling.”

“Buuuuurn.”

“Creeeest, he’s sassier than you. I don’t like this place anymore. I want to go back to effortlessly teasing you all the time.”

“I did put up a fight sometimes.”

“No, you didn’t. Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Sargeant, do you still have the muzzle around?”

“Ready at hoof. Should I put it on or are you going to do it yourself?”

“He’s been doing it himself for the past decade!”

“Ouch!”

“I may be outnumbered, but never out-snarked!”

“You’re taking being in Canterlot rather well, since, you know, you’re an enemy again.”

“I’ve got a plan, Crest.”

“Do I really want to know?”

“Should you be talking in front of Royal Guards?”

“My plan accounts for that as well.”

“Well, Fury. We’re descending into the courtyard, and from what I can see there are a bunch of Royal Guards standing around, as well as… oh no...”

“That sounded even worse than usual. What’s going on?”

“Star Trail.”

“Ohohoho...”

“No, Fury… if you dare make fun of Puff’s-”

“Funny how little you know me, Crest. When we land, let me talk before you say something you’ll regret for the rest of your life.”

“How about your life? Are you ignoring the fact that these ponies still think about you the way I did when I found you?”

“I have an excellent advantage.”

“Holy light I need to hear that one...”

“Mine will be much shorter.”

*Thud.*

“We’ve landed. Be careful about- HOLY?! FURY!”

*Hoofsteps rushing closer.*

“Did she just vault over the railing? I thought she was in bad shape.”

“Sh- she is, I swear.”

“Then she can’t see the Royal Guards ready to stab her?”

“She can hear them, let’s move before she or they do something really dumb.”

“STAR TRAIL, ARE YOU THERE! STAR TRAIL! HEY, YOU OLD FANATIC, GET OVER HERE!”

*Approaching hoofsteps crunching on grass.*

“Stop screaming, bug, what do you want?”

“I am here to inform you about, and take full responsibility for, the death of your apprentice Puff.”

“...because Crest doesn’t deserve the hate...”