• Published 2nd Mar 2017
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Jeff's Equine Misadventure - Jeff Belinger



Jeff Belinger, a master weaponsmith from a post apocalypse earth is displaced into Equestria

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The Portal

It was roughly around noon, local time, and the sun was high in the sky and the temperature only kept on rising. For the locals, this would be an average day if it wasn't for the fact there was a crowd around the local military bunker held by the mythical Brotherhood of Steel. Of course, since the Brotherhood of Steel was jealously guarding this base, there must be something going on inside.

Rumor had it that Written in Blood was conducting experiments with hardware acquired from a previous raid on the Chinese Conglomerate. The Raid had been organized by Written in Blood, lead by the Brotherhood of Steel and Phoenix Company and consolidated by a few other tagalong groups of wastelanders. Phoenix company was providing overwatch with their rangers as well as doing vehicular patrols around the bunker to prevent any raiders from taking potshots at the locals gathered at the gate of the base.

"Let us through you assholes, we wanna go in", said Roach, as he was stomping around, being a general nuisance to the power armored guards. A vocal majority cheered as Roached was failing to convince the guards from letting the crowd through. Knight Captain Quinn sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Roach, you know we can't let you in, we have specific orders to shoot to maim if anyone comes in. Besides, you know Elder Price, he has made a base so solid you won't even manage to break through without getting your butthole torn apart by at least three M-60 shooting down the hallway. Also, Elias said to me I could kill anyone of you if you start to riot like a bunch of monkeys", Quinn whined. This did not please Roach at all.

"Whatever, I'm just gonna put down my vendor and sell food to people who are starving around here", Roach said as he deployed his vending machine, solar panel and gas generator out of his Hammerspace inventory.

Inside the base, Jeff was making some ammunition for the rest of the Brotherhood of Steel, as they decided to resupply themselves with their gigantic stockpile of resources. Head Paladin Elias Burning was on edge, as per his usual. "I know something fucked up is going to happen, mark my words, something is going to go wrong with this experiment" Elias rambled on.

"Probably some abominations are going to spawn out of the portal and we're going to be stuck in here having to fight them and getting ourselves murdered".

Jeff gave a side glance at Elias and grunted. "You'd almost be correct if it wasn't for the fact that Price made sure to build a containment area near the portal, if anything happens, it's going to be stuck in the containment area". Jeff continued making the pulse ammunition through his pulse assembly station.

"There, I'm done with the pulse ammunition. A thousand rounds divided in batteries of fifty charges. Do you want me to make some microfusion cells for those of us using laser and plasma weapons" Jeff asked Elias.

"Yeah, sure, hold on, let me give you the resources for that" Elias answered as he handed him over the massive resources for the ammo. "Alright, " said Jeff, "I can make about thirty-five microfusion cells with that, hopefully we won't be needing more than that for the next two weeks".

Torres and Crucible were talking to each other near the command panel of the portal device. "I'm sure everything will be fine, It's not our first time messing with Conglo tech. What's the worse that can go wrong" asked Torres.

"We could literally open up a portal to hell and be overwhelmed by hideous monsters from another universe, or the portal was rigged to open up in mainland China and we'll be overwhelmed by Conglo guards" Deadpanned Crucible, ever the pessimistic one.

Leon Price walked over to his two friends and former Brotherhood member, now member of the reclusive Written in Blood faction. "So, gentlemen, are we ready to start the experiment?" Asked Leon Price, Elder of the Brotherhood of Steel of this region.

"Not yet, we're still missing someone to oversee to operation, we're waiting on Aesir", Crucible replied.

"Speaking of the Devil, I'm here you jackasses" Said the ghoul in his dry voice as he went through security.

"I saw you tightened security, Price, I even spotted the Phoenix Company lookouts over the dunes and hills and on vehicles around the base, You and Sheppard upgraded security since the last incident" Aesir said in a sarcastic tone.

"Yeah, we did that because last time was a clusterfuck and we ended up shooting each other" Said Price as he remembered the last large scale operation organized by Written in Blood.

"So, are we ready to start this show or do we have to wait some more, I assume you've already fixed all the possible hardware and software issues, correct" asked Aesir.

"Yep, everything's ready, we're about to-" but Torres was interrupted by the sound of the alarm being raised.

"Price! There's a bunch of Raiders on their way down to the Bunker, they're coming on vehicles from the south. It's a huge raiding party of about twelve or fifteen vehicles, no clear count, there's at least four armored personnel carriers and the rest are four seaters. Phoenix company has already started engaging them on vehicle, but at the speed they're going, they're gonna arrive within five minutes", stated Quinn over the squad radio to the rest of the base.

Jeff had finished making the ammunition and turned towards Elias. "I guess you half right, we are getting in trouble, but not from the portal. Alright, let me switch from my scribe robes to some actual armor and I'll get my M249 SAW". Elias picked up his M60 and went over to the gate of the base, passing through security gates.

Over up top, Quinn and his men were retreating back to the bunker's fortifications. The crowd that had gathered there previously had, for some, fled the area and the rest had decided to switch to their heavier armors and weapons to help defend from the raid in hopes of getting fat stacks of loot from the raiders. The Brotherhood of Steel didn't mind the extra civilian support, but it was going to be superfluous and an inconvenience since there would be more bodies between the Brotherhood of Steel and Phoenix Company.

Aesir laughed. "We can still do the experiment, Price's defenses are near impenetrable, the idiots won't stand a chance against Price's anvil and the hammer of Phoenix Company". Torres and Crucible looked at each other and winced.

"We'd prefer to defend from the attack first and then do the experiment, I mean, it's only logical-" Torres was interrupted.

"Don't you see, the raiders are here for the portal, they are thirsty for it, they know it's here because the people couldn't shut their loud mouths. We're doing the experiment now" Aesir declared.

Aesir went over the console, typed in the console, flipped a few switches and pressed the large red button. Unberknowst to them, Jeff had went around the barricades surrounding the portal device to put on his armor and grab his weapon from his Hammerspace inventory. At the moment the button was pressed, Torres threw a look over to the portal barricades and saw Jeff finished putting on his armor.

"JEFF WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THERE GET OUT WE'RE ACTIVATING THE PORTAL" Crucible yelled at Jeff, who was caught unaware.

"WHAT" Jeff said as the portal opened and started sucking air at an alarming rate, enough to throw Jeff to the ground. Jeff was gripping the floor as hard as he could, he was strong, but the vacuum was too strong for him.

Half of Jeff's body was through the portal already and slipped even further in every second.

"SHUT DOWN THE PORTAL, DO SOMETHING", Torres yelled at Aesir.

"I can't. If I close the portal now, he'll be cut in half, believe me we don't want that, its his stupid fault for being there in the first place" Aesir said in his raspy voice. Torres, Crucible and Aesir could only watch as Jeff was slowly engulfed into the portal and into another dimension.


It was a warm day in Equestria, a few clouds had been placed by the weather patrol, a typical day in Ponyville. Twilight was in the library of her castle, going over some magical treaties about Swift Wit's advanced conjuration spells. It was a relaxing for Twilight, she liked to keep up to date with the new spells being developed by Celestia's Academy for gifted unicorns. Everything was normal until a tear in the fabric of reality opened fifteen meters away from Twilight. Twilight turned around confused and utterly flabbergasted.

"What's going on now" She asked.

"This better not be me trying to tell myself about some terrible thing that would happen again" Twilight groaned as she went over the portal, her hair being blown by the incoming wind. Suddenly, something came out of the portal. At first Twilight wasn't sure, what it was, legs being pulled by the wind force, then, an entire person.

Twilight was curious, but cautious about this stranger. The portal closed and the wind subsided, leaving twilight's hair in a mess. The person on the ground grunted and picked himself up and whatever machine that was next to him. The creature had his back turned to Twilight, she was about five feet four inches tall, but the man was about five feet eleven inches tall wearing some sort of armor made of metal and Kevlar. The man turned around, weapon in hands.

"Where, the fuck am I now?" Jeff said as he was awed by the crystalline walls of the castle. Twilight cringed as she heard the man curse.

"Language mister! I don't know who you are and where you come from, but this is no way to talk in a civilized society" Twilight said as she undid the mess that was her hair.

Jeff looked over the purple skinned person in front of her. "Ok, I'll apologize for swearing, but you have to tell me where I am and who you are" the large man said inquisitorialy.

Twilight scoffed and answered. "You're in my library, in my castle in Ponyville. Now tell me who you are".

"My designation is Senior Scribe TEC77-5-13, my name is Jeff Belinger, Brotherhood of Steel". This only confused Twilight further.

"Ok, that doesn't tell me anything except you might be some sort of warrior from another dimension, maybe" Twilight said as she started walking around Jeff, examining him closely.

"Well, I'don't exactly know where "Ponyville" is but looking at you, little missy, you obviously aren't the warrior type, more of a scholar I presume?" Jeff Said as he followed Twilight with his eyes.

"Well, you're at least sensible and able to make rational thought, so there's at least that. This is a weapon in your hands, right? I've never seen anything like it before", Twilight questioned the man.

Jeff Was getting a bit tired of the questions, but he knew it couldn't be helped. What if she had been dragged into their world, she would have been made prisoner immediately and questionned by Elias and Price for a good three hours.

"Well, as much as I want to answer more question, I need to know if there's any danger around here, if there's any threats to my life right now", the senior scribe asked.

"Threats? In Ponyville, maybe some things in the Everfree forest, but nothing came out of there for a good two years now" Twilight said as she giggled.

"I'd still like to go see how the outside looks, just to understand exactly where I am, if you can understand what I mean, this is a new land and I need to get some bearings".

"Of course, we'll go over to a balcony, you'll be able to see outside and get a feel for what the world looks like." Twilight told Jeff.

They walked outside of the library and into a corridor going along the circular shape of the castle. They arrived at the main balcony at the front of the castle and Jeff saw something he'd never seen before.

"The land is green and fertile with life, there's no violence outside, no gunshots in the distance, you can actually hear the birds singing, and not just crows, this place looks beautiful, nothing like Earth" Jeff told Twilight.

"Wait, no greenery, no birds, no violence? What kind of world do you come from" Twilight asked.

"A wounded world, ravaged by war, torn by greed and ravished by evil".

"So that's why you have this armor and big weapon with you" Twilight assumed. "Yes, If you don't mind, I'd like to take off my armor if nothing dangerous is going to be coming our way, also store my weapon and ammunition too, if you wouldn't mind" Jeff said.

"Oh, of course, I'll take you to a vacant room of the castle for you to use during your stay here, obviously you won't be going back to your world for a while". Twilight and Jeff walked and went to a vacant guest room where Jeff could stay. Jeff took off his armor and placed it back in his hammerspace inventory as well as his ammo and M249 SAW.

"Wait, you can do magic? where did your armor and weapon go" Asked Twilight.

"Well, that's the beauty of this little device here, " Jeff pointed at his arm, where a wrist mounted computer device was placed. "This might not be a Pip-boy brand wrist computer, but it does essentially the same thing, it also allows me to build things and have a garage of vehicle in hammerspace, a private place between world if I go by what Crucible told me, a real marvel of technology this thing".

"Wow, we don't have that kind of technology here in Equestria-" Twilight said as she was interrupted by the chuckle of Jeff.

"Equestria, what are you, horse aficionados in your world".

"I'm a pony, for your information, and if you want to see a horse, maybe you should go to Saddle Arabia" Twilight said as Jeff laughed even harder.

"Okay, Okay, this explains the long face and the hooves, but not your horn, what are you, a magic unicorn princess or something" Jeff laughed with a tear in his eye.

Twilight unfurled her wings from her back and displayed them to him.

"Ok, winged unicorn, that's even more into fantasy than I imagined" said Jeff as he tried to compose himself. "Yes, I'm an alicorn princess as a matter of fact, the princess of friendship-" Twilight had been yet again interrupted by Jeff laughing his life away.

"Princess of friendship, okay, that's pretty good, I'll take you at your word because i have no choice, but this is funny to me, because" Jeff laughed more "Because in my world, people are real dic- jerkbags".

Jeff Stopped laughing and composed himself. "Anyway, now that I'm here, I'd like to actually do something productive. I'm a weapons manufacturer, but I also dabble into mechanics and medical sciences, oh, I'm a mean cook in my spare time as well".

"Oh, wow, you have a variety of fields, what's your cutie mark like" Twilight asked

"My cutie-what now?"