• Member Since 30th Sep, 2014
  • offline last seen Dec 9th, 2023

CartoonNerd12


Sequels1

E

A Dragon Warrior whose actually a dragon?! Spike grew up among the ponies of Canterlot and worshipped his heroes, The Elements of Harmony. Never had he imagine he could actually become one of them!

Chapters (10)
Comments ( 57 )

:pinkiehappy: I haven't read it yet, but I will as soon as I can. :yay: I :heart: Kung Fu Panda.

Okay, let's see:

Po-Spike
Mr. Ping-Discord
Shifu-Twilight Sparkle
Tigress-Applejack
Mantis-Rainbow Dash
Viper-Fluttershy
Monkey-Pinkie Pie
Crane-Rarity
Oogway-Celestia
Tai Lung-Trixe

Omg, instant water later. Kung Fu Panda is my movieeeee bruh.

Just read it. So awesome! :rainbowkiss:

7953732 Yeah, it's just cause I have no time rn to read it XD

7953732 THTis is cool.

Want to know what would be cooler?

Take plot and screw it all around.

You have an interesting premise. Don't deaden it by just following a Cookie Cutter style.

Go! Be FREE! MAKE YOUR OWN STORY!

THIS IS FANFICTION!

7954780 Don't worry, I intend to twist things around. :twilightsmile:

tracking :trixieshiftleft:
kung fu panda is my favorite dreamworks franchise; httyd is good, but it doesn't make me feel the way kfp does.
however.
I have some criticisms :pinkiesick:
i'm no stranger to crossovers like this. I'm currently writing one of my own.
this fic lacks... the small details :rainbowhuh: by writing this type of story, you're creating an entire world. you can't skip out on the textures, the inner thoughts. we don't read any thoughts until the very end. we don't get to read what spike's house looks like, or what the stadium looks like. imagery, that's the word. (not an intentional ultron reference :facehoof:)
perhaps a better way to say it was that I can't hear your voice as an author yet. it feels generic, like a children's chapter book.
the characters, too, don't feel quite right. in the first draft of my own story, it was kind of like this. you have the mlp names, but the dialogue from what it's crossing with. that feels... unnatural. there's things that these characters would not say.
Something that I did like was the bit with the Pegasus guards.

"Halt!" one said, "No unauthorized merchandise in the stadium."

that felt like it belonged. write more stuff similar to that, this will be a fun story :pinkiehappy:

I fear how his first day of training is going to go compared to Po's.

He had only seen the outside of it and it was even bigger on the inside! 

All the buildings in Equestria have TARDIS physics. :rainbowlaugh:

7956252 well fire pit wont work on him

nit pick time!

A voice said, "At least you're humble* to admit it, I'll give you that."

*humble enough

"Well, I say you're not. Not until you have the Dragon Scroll in your hands*."

*claws

Rarity was priming* herself in front of the mirror

*primping

Dragon Warrior or not, I can't see me getting together with him…
Twilight saw the look as well and thought, If he can get distracted by a pretty face then he definitely has no business being on a battlefield…

there should be a space in here.

What is this warm bubbly sensation I'm feeling?

this sounds like AJ's thoughts, but the way it was written it looks like spike's.

okay, you're overall tighter in this chapter. more stuff sounds in-character, and this does feel different from the original. still missing the imagery though. they seem to be in celestia's castle, which feels a bit odd. I almost feel they should be in twilight's castle.

I also kind of missed the 'fanboying' scene. spike, I feel, would definitely fanboy over the Elements, and they should definitely have collected a few trophies over the years.

I think i'm going to rate your chapters now.
prologue: D
chapter 1: C-
chapter 2: C+
getting better, but you've got some ways to go.

Interesting.

Good so far, but I think, Discord and Spike, could have still went with the cooking angle instead of the joke shop. Will be hard to get around that in the later chapters with, Pinkie, there.

That ending was a total mood whiplash. :applejackconfused:

Great job, and Applejack's talk with Spike made me see her as Sugarcoat for that moment. Being brutally honest with him.

Sacred Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom

think this should be the tree of harmony, but whatever...

wasn't pinkie supposed to be monkey? why's she mantis all of a sudden?

I'm very interested in this story.

Awesome work again. I'm glad you're not making the girls jerks to Spike the way Shifu and half the Furious Five were to Po

Great chapter. Great work show that Spike will work hard to be the Dragon Warrior. Awesome job show off the main six.

So no 'the past is history. ...."?

"Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them… The Monster Book of Monsters… The Monster-pedia…"

That made me laugh. I actually just watched 'Fantastic Beasts' over the weekend. I believe the second book is from an 'Alvin ant the Chipmunks' cartoon, and the third one was mentioned in 'The Bonds of Family' at some point, I recognize from something else, only I cant remember what.:twilightsmile::twilightsheepish:

This... This is good

Love the flashback on how they came together

Hmm... I'm absolutely amazed of how you kept true to the Secrets of the Furious Five and also seamlessly combined it with the stories of the Mane 6. I love how you incorporated the backstory of Spike, it reminds me of how Twilight hatched Spike but keeping the one who hatched Spike a secret is very well done. Keep it up.

Great job. I loved that bit with Rainbow acting like Mantis.

While I get having Celestia leave on matters of state, it doesn't have the same emotional impact as the movie... But it's nice to see the how Spike reacted to the news and the calling out of Twilight's lack of faith.

8204927 totally agree with you on that!

I am surprised no pony thought that Celestia might be pulling a prank on them... you know like in A Bird in the Hoof with the Cakes continuing to pour Celestia tea...

To admit I thought you would have twilight catch spike doing something more amazing other than him using his fire breath, to me that seems pretty basic for spike.

Applejack and the others are one their way into trouble,

Spike has to realize the deeper meaning behind the scroll before it's too late

This is beautiful, I can't wait for the sequel^^

Awesome job. Glad it didn't have to escalate into an all our battle

Congratulations

it looks like the sequels have potential, but yeah it does feel... rushed.

Discord makes a pretty hilarious Mr. Ping. :rainbowlaugh:

I feel like Megalovania from Undertale would be fitting right now.

Well this was a pretty good story. I loved the reunion with Twilight and Trixie. :pinkiesad: Thx for an awesome story. :twilightsmile:

Well this was a pretty good story. I loved the reunion with Twilight and Trixie. :pinkiesad: Thx for an awesome story. :twilightsmile:

Comment posted by JazzTheFox53rd deleted Feb 5th, 2018

I like the story, but why Trixie? Wouldn't Starlight Glimmer or Luna fit better?

Comment posted by CartoonNerd12 deleted Oct 25th, 2018

9250847
You did read my author's note back in Chapter 1 right?

KFD3 is here!

Here goes nothing... LITERALLY, because there’s nothing written on it. It’s blank!

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