• Member Since 3rd Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Sunday

Fex


T

I am Granite and I woke up in a place called the Cursed Salt Plains. Now I try to find out about who I am and where I came from. While unraveling where my kind came from and their history.

A Chess Game of the Gods fic that will slowly go towards Equestria at some point.

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 24 )

The pic got me interested XD

You have run-on sentences and a lot of spelling mistakes. I'd advise a re-read.

Fex

I use words as spelling check and it said it all was good but I probably need a pre-reader

Faved on the fact you have a stone/crystal dino:yay:

:pinkiesad2: "stay away from my family, if they see you, you could die"

Fex

For those following this story. Sorry it took so long I had a bit of a writers block about the beginning and the end.

it's all good. now were gettin somewhere! :pinkiehappy: moar please.

I see your muse is back.
Lovely chapter to get back in the groove!

Fex

1860352 the muse wasn't the problem life was the problem

some how i was expecting some survivors but...

Fex

1873312 who knows maybe one of the ponies in the temple or the town was able to get away before Granite saw it. Or this is all a dream. Its a mystery woOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

...
Please get an editor if you dont have time to edit this yourself, this story is quite good but there are multiple errors in every sentance.
No offence intended but is english your second language? Nah, it doesn't matter, even the best authors have editors and there are plenty of people who are willling to edit.
I suggest the "proof readers" group (if my memory is still correct) or you can just search 'editors'.

This chapter is good storywise and I hope you are better and write more.
:3

Just want to mention something that maybe somewhat funny.

Have Granet say sumething near spike if they should meed and have Spike respond just as he would like he understood the lizard. (Since spike is a dragon it's possible that Dragons would communicate with other creature especially lizard or reptiles easier) Then have someone say, "Wait you can understand him?" But then again it may not work. But I just want to leave open this idea if you want to use it.

You should really look into getting a prereader and also MAKE MORE CHAPTERS

888861 I Second that and also try and get an editor.

Fex

3571347 I had a pre-reader but I haven't heard much off him so I have to find a new one. Since I am in the middle of moving out I got no time.

i need more it makes me feel like jumping off a skyscraper singing numa numa

hey I can be a proofreader if you need one I may not be the best but I can spot as many as possible

Fex

5742395 sorry but I lost all inspiration for this story. Maybe when it comes back I might continue it again.

:fluttercry: Why? Just why? Why does it have to stop here. it seemed like a good story and then it just stops. Shame on you

Why? Just why? Why does it have to stop here. it seemed like a good story and then it just stops. Shame on you

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