Prologue
My life has run its course; I’ve planted my hooves firmly on the ground and ridden the ups and downs to my greatest potential. I’ve loved, I’ve hated, I’ve cried, I’ve laughed… but most importantly I’ve overcome.
Overcome my upbringing, my sorrows, my regrets, my downfalls, my losses and my failures. I’m complete, or almost complete.
All that’s left is the smooth keys in front of me and a final wish. I could do it; I would call her to me and see her for a final time.
Taking a deep meditative breath I brought my left hoof down on a key. It gave off a pure sound, one that rung out crisply and reverberated pleasantly; I could feel the bass undertone rattle deep in my chest. An electric blue light had flashed before my eyes; a mere spark, or a compound that, when combined with another, would begin to manifest.
A brief smile tweaked the corners of my muzzle.
I still had it in me.
I played a second note, and the blazing red spark elicited rose to accommodate the blue one. Together they danced momentarily before combining together as a crackling blue and red orb.
I played a fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh.
The new colors began to combine with the orb, circling it, changing it, becoming a backdrop for a picture. The scene began to unfold before my very eyes.
I would call her back… even if it killed me.
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Woah, good hook
I like it. =)
Just a little nitpick:
'in the process of doing so.' is redundant.
Here are two better endings to the sentence:
...even if doing so killed me.
...even if I were killed in the process.
I hope that helps.
not quite sure what i just read...
Wow... Very well done!
Ummmmm....... What did I just read?
whats happening?
1382889 keep reading and find out
Holy shit, Best hook ever!
You got me.
and already hit the feels for me.... sometimes the description just reminds ya of the personal things in your life.
1382889 pinkie pie is mafia!!!!!
A story that gained my like with less than 500 words? Well then.
Interesting Beginning, leaves a lot of questions, which I suppose is good. Not much learned except that Vinyl longs for someone, and has a piano-like instrument that summons colors. Count me interested.
Beautiful sounding beginning. It leaves so much unanswered that the readers are compelled to go on. I've put off reading this story for a couple of weeks, it's time for me to fix that.
~SolidFire
Does anyone else feel that the prologe doesnt start from vinyls perspective? this pony wants to call some one back and the first 2 colors are 2 of vinyls main colors? is the prologe octavia?