• Member Since 26th Jan, 2016
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago

Foxhelm


Found the show in late 2015, and fell in love with it. I also like D&D (3 and 3.5), Fansty novel and movie, Sci-Fi movies. MarbleMac is Best Ship and Flashlight is a fair second

Sequels1

E
Source

This story is a sequel to My Little Mages: The New World Map


It has been the better part of a year since Twilight et al faced Starlight, and while much has happened, it has been for the most part a peaceful year. However, after believing she sighted Starlight at a guest lecture she was presenting, Twilight is unsure if everything is as peaceful as she thought. Her fears are revealed to be well founded as she and Spike return to the Castle of Friendship to find Starlight at the Aura Map table. After casting a spell and discarding the scroll it was written on, Starlight vanishes in portal she evoked. And after Spike touched the scroll, Twilight and Spike are sent to day that Rainbow Dash preformed her first Sonic Rainboom, only to witness it being stopped.

Now flung into a preset drastically different from their time, Twilight and Spike must find away to set the time stream on it's proper course. But Starlight has not made it easy to counter this.

Can Twilight correct the course of history?
Can she save Mystica and the rest of the world from ruin?
Or will Starlight have her complete revenge on Twilight, no matter the cost?

A My Little Mages retelling of The Cutie Remarking
Cover art by Didj (go support his work)

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 59 )

Season 8? Season 7 barely ended. :applejackunsure:

8555720
I am only now at tge season five finale and RL stuff. It's my projected schedule. And Season 8 has been cconfirmed. There is an animatic for I think the opener that was first aid at HasbroCon back in September.

Hello there. Sorry I took so long to get around to reviewing this and I have no excuse beyond self-admitted laziness. Anyway, great job on the start of this story. The exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-ups are all quite done in all the right places. And, yeah, I kind of have to agree with you on the fact that there were a few too many alternate timelines in the actual episode . Of course, one of the advantages to this being fan fiction is the fact that you can include greater detail on certain things especially if you are limiting yourself to only ONE alternate timeline, which would allow for greater detail still .

At any rate, I will very certainly be looking forward to more of this, but will also be quite willing to be patient as I know real world concerns must come first.

Hello there. Thanks immensely for getting this chapter up. Again, very good job on the characterizations, action, exchanges and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked you showing the brief scenes of the girls not getting their destiny realizations, the details concerning just HOW the time travel spell was modified as well as the scene with Time Turner and Bright Eyes explaining the situation to Twilight and Spike .

So, yeah, I will most assuredly be looking forward to more of this, but will also understand if it takes a while, both because of potential thinking time and because real world concerns have to come first.

“That didn’t answer the question.” Twilight pointed out.

I know, right? :ajbemused:

By the way, I'm starting to think that this story might need a crossover tag. :raritywink::rainbowlaugh:

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The part going from the arrival of the Tardis to the end of the chapter.

Hello there. Thanks very much for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. I LOVED the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked the Abbott and Costello homage close to the start of the chapter (as lampshaded by Spike), plus Spike's calling Twi out when she started to get particularly desperate and Time Turner's further explanations and suggestion of an alternative time travelling method .

And, yeah, I will very much be looking forward to more of this, but will also be willing to respect if it takes a while.

And, well, Happy Holidays. :-D

The exchange between Twilight and Starlight at the beginning was a real, nice classic touch.

The part where Twilight try to convince Young Dash to do the sonic rainboom is like the show's one, but then I remembered that they are human in this 'verse, so it gets more strange and funny!

Good work, and have a nice Christmas and a happy new year!

"Who's on First?" Really? :ajbemused:

Also, I'm seeing a bit of Lilo and Nani in Spike and Twilight's argument.

“WELL COME ON, ALLONS-Y!!!” he shouted.

This gonna be good. :ajsmug:

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"Who's on First?" Really? :ajbemused:

I regret nothing!:rainbowdetermined2:

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I personally would have found it a lot funnier if you hadn't published the ApplePie recreation of that skit yesterday. Just saying. :applejackunsure:

8621657
As Frank Sinatra once said, "That's Life."

Okay, with all the additions and improvements that you have made to the story already, you're really going to need to beef up Starlight's motivation. I mean, it was fine with the events in canon, but with this story, I'm expecting something utterly heart-wrenching. No pressure. :scootangel:

Hey there. Thanks very much for getting the next chapter up. Again, great job on the action, exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked how Starlight reminded Twilight of the preparations she made and the REASON she and Twilight are so evenly matched as well as Time Turner's pep talk and the extra details concerning Twilight's last ditch plan to get Starlight to listen to reason . And, yeah, I am DEFINITELY looking forward to seeing what extra details you will be going into concerning Starlight's backstory.

And, yeah, I will also strongly respect if real world concerns cut in on your writing time.

8624954
Um... It was Brighteyes that gave the prep talk

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Ooopsie. Thanks for the correction. Serves me right for reading too fast.

I hope you don't mind me hazarding a guess as to how the wasteland happened, but, well, if it's too much into the spoiler territory, I profusely apologize in advance.

Anyway, here is my guess: there was eventually a three-way war between Nightmare Moon, Chrysalis and Sombra with Discord basically sitting back and soaking up the chaos so that his power would be at its peak. Unfortunately, Tirek eventually busted out of Tartarus and after draining enough innocents, then picked off Chrysalis, Nightmare Moon, Sombra and Discord one by one and in that order. Of course, Tirek didn't get a chance to enjoy having the combined power of all four of the other major villains because he got caught by the Plunder Vines. In desperation to escape, Tirek unleashed all of the power he absorbed into one blast, which wiped out all live including the Plunder Vines AND himself. If my guess is wrong, I apologize for wasting your time, but I was trying to think of an apocalypse scenario that somehow involves as many of the major villains as possible.

So, on a scale of one to ten, just how accurate is my guess?

Oooh, okay, you definitely put a whole lot more emotional weight into this resolution than what we actually got in canon. Good job. I still have the headcanon that Starlight is actually an orphan and that the house she was living in was an orphanage, but I understand if you feel like that would be too sad.

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Back in "Revenge of Nightmare Moon", I address the freezing temperature, falling snow, etc, which is what happens with eternal night.
For the rest because the internal harmony of Luna while as Nightmare Moon was never reset, the Elements of Harmony didn't get new bearers and the harmony that Celestia and Luna used to seal away Discord was never broken. Because Twilight never used the spell to travel back in time to tell herself to not worry about the future, Kerberos didn't leave his post and thus Tirek never got out of Tartarus. Due to the eternal night, people died off and the love that Chrysalis was drawn too was gone, and she too suffered under it. Concerning Sombra, Nightmare Moon would not suffer a challenger, but again eternal night and the dying of everything. And that's not addressing the eternal day on the other side. TL;DR, look at the planet Mercury, it spins very slowly in its axis, and the side closest to the sun is stupidly hot and the other side is stupidly cold

8629099
It's not I think the orphan idea is too sad, it's mostly because the orphan trope has been used often enough in my opinion and that I can't see there be anything that her being a latchkey kid wouldn't have already cover. Basically, I ask 'why kill someone off if they can just be offscreen and their absence conveys all the same points?'

8629116

Okay. Thanks very much for the answer. And, yeah, that DOES make sense.

On another note, this is an excellent job on the chapter. The exchanges, characterization and future story set-up are all quite well done. I particularly liked how you put a little more emotional weight behind Starlight's backstory, how well you combined punishment with rehabilitation AND the touch concerning the basically "for old time's sake" letter to Celestia.

But just out of curiosity, did you simple forget to switch the story to "Complete" or is there really one more chapter left? Either way, it's okay.

At any rate, I will still be looking forward to more of your work, but will still be quite willing to be patient.

8629174
I just haven't gotten to switching it to complete yet.

Now Starlight's reasons aren't so petty as in the show! Always hated characters like that...

‘Deposited, one heavily modified time travel spell scroll into Vault 13.’

Nice reference! One of my favourite shows.

Comment posted by titanhades70 deleted Dec 25th, 2017
Comment posted by titanhades70 deleted Jan 6th, 2018
Comment posted by titanhades70 deleted Jan 6th, 2018
Comment posted by titanhades70 deleted Jan 6th, 2018

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At least I don't insult people for having their own opinion and take on things that happen on a tv show.

Do you think that all the members of the fandom who hate Starlight's reasons are wrong and they didn't understand the character? Good, maybe you are right, maybe you are not. It's your opinion to have and I respect it.
What I don't respect is the unnecessary need to insult people for having a different opinion from yours. That's just mean and childish.

I won't make assumptions about you and I won't do and say anything rude, but I simply ask you to refrain from this behaviour and to consider that not everybody likes the same characters as somebody else, and sometimes that sentiment is such that they won't give too much of their time to try and deeply analyze that character. It happened to me many times, so I can understand what you are feeling, and I know that throwing insults it's not the solution, but the cause of many problems.

Having said that, I bid thee farewell and hope that you at least will think about I said.

One question about this that's got me asking something. Because of the Rainboom never happening and the alternate things that would have happened to the main characters, would Twilight not hatching Spike lead to her becoming more like Sci-Twi?

XD HAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! :rainbowlaugh: "Who's The Chronomancer"

nicely done; also, obligatory music/reference, go:

8739919
I hope you enjoy the rest of my works

8740118
I am: I just haven't thought of a proper way to comment on any of them yet...

8629124
So, a synopsis for a future episode involves Starlight and Sunburst visiting their parents, so my whole "Starlight is an orphan" headcanon has just gone out the window. :ajbemused: Wait, if the first pony that Starlight thinks of when Twilight says "first pony you ever cared about" is Sunburst, then (pause) what kind of ponies were her parents that she preferred Sunburst over them?! Hopefully, that question will get answered when the episode airs.

8819860
There is a little more nuance to the matter than that.

“I that was Rainbow Dash, she seemed really you.

I thing you have some typos in this

friends didn’t become the friends.”

I don’t think you need the “the” here

“We need to travel to one second after we they left.”

another one, i cant tell if it’s meant to be “we” or “they”. also you spelled doc’s catchphrase wrong, it’s “allons-y”
besides from those things it’s looking good so far, *thumbs up*

8954995
I mean we, as in Time Turner and Brighteyes, Twilight and Spike were already gone. So why would Time Turner be talking about them when he and Brighteyes need to time travel?

8955113
cant always tell, still have the catchphrase mis spelled in your note at the top

“And if she was able to go to Cumlua,

pre-founding of Mystia Skyborn tribe’s symbols.

Well, after thinking I was stood up and went over to the bar to get a drank.”

Twilight was slightly taken back at the taught that Star Swirl knowledge’s on

You got the “l” and “u” swapped
Left out a “c” in Mystica
Miss spelled “drink”
I think you mean “thought that Star Swirl’s knowledge on”

Comment posted by ChucklesTheJester deleted May 30th, 2018
Comment posted by ChucklesTheJester deleted May 30th, 2018
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