I'm just somepony who wants to finish a story. I hope you enjoy the ride along with me!
This is just an old story I've written for FanFiction.net. I'm uploading it to Fimfiction so you can see what kind of stuff I've written years ago. Anyway, Enjoy!
Ditzy "Derpy" Hooves . . . Rainbow Dash . . . Who will stand? . . . Who will fall?
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Hm... the idea is not bad, that's for sure. The grammar is a little off at times, mixed tenses and was/were, but still readable. But as you said, it's an old story, so I can't possibly comment. I'd like to see this AU as a whole story, the insight was good - though the explanation would need far more space to unfurl
The fight itself was great, again a little more detailed description wouldn't hurt.
7923954 Thank you!!!!
7926877 You're welcome. If you need any help, feel free to drop me a PM or a comment
7926881 Will do!!
I know this was an old idea you had, and therefore I assume there are no plans to ever finish it, but it makes for quite the interesting base for a story. I’m getting cyberpunk vibes and I’m all for that!
The fight between Rainbow Dash and Derpy could’ve been longer and more fleshed out (mind the pun), but if one was to look at this as just the summary for something great it would be just fine. I’m hooked honestly, and I crave more yet I know I cannot have it. Perhaps that’s the most thrilling part about this story. Well, that and wanting to know the outcome of this Matrix-like Equestria.
It always sucks when great things go unfinished, but I got deep enjoyment from reading this regardless, and that’s all that matters in the end of the day.