A dragon is dying; a dragon who stood for so much, and was loved by many. Gathered around her death bed, the dragon's family grieve as they realise the future they face without her. A desolate and bleak future.
A father: who is to lose the love of his life and now has the responsibility to raise a child all on his own.
And a youngling female whelp, who shall soon have no mother. The mother who was supposed to be her guiding force and inspiration, to show her the joys of life.
But from the dying embers a new fire shall start, one that heralds a new age. An age of hope and enlightenment for those of dragonkind.
Chapters (1)
Emotional to be sure. But you the basic dragon tenant is 'want, take, have', and don't take from a dragon horde unless you want your home town burned to the ground, and Torch just had what was most precious to him above all else stolen from him that can never be realized. But at least this answers where the heck Ember's mother was.
Good story, though kinda a wall text here.
7893551 Thanks.
Is it better with the spacing now? I'm still trying to get the hang of Finfiction formatting.
7892912 Thanks Alex. I certainly did push it a bit for Torch but the way I was trying to weave it was that this was the catalyst for Ember and Torch to become who they are in "The Gauntlet of Fire." It's supposed to be that the mother was a dragon that wasn't as violent as the rest, and that Ember was trying to continue that legacy.
7909374 much, thank you.
Full review here, but in brief: nice to see an Emberfic. Fairly predictable, but nice that you leave what caused Blaze's injuries open. Solid proofing, too. Always good to see someone publishing their first story. I hope it's not your last!
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Thanks Logan, I appreciate the feedback and agree with your criticisms. Sorry it took me so long to get back. It’s certainly far too predictable and Torch's character really bugs me. I really couldn’t figure out how to write him in such a context. Blaze feels considerably one dimensional to me too.
This fic was written for a weekend competition and I was aiming to challenge myself to write something to time whilst keeping it quite short. If I were to do it again, I think I’d probably scratch Torch entirely and give the story some more length to lead the plot somewhere unexpected - either that or limit the scope so it doesn’t feel so crammed and emotionally forced.
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Thank you for replying! The best of luck with your future writing, too.