• Published 6th Jun 2017
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Pyrophobia - VilkaTheWolf



I've woken up with a hangover to discover that everyone I know is gone, and I'm a dragon. (A Ponies After People Story)

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Chapter Eight: A Hangover You Don't Deserve

Everything was spinning. Maybe I had a bit too much to drink last night. Looking at the ground around the bed I was on I saw six bottles of various spirits… six plus the three or four I had earlier.

What the fuck!? I should be dead. No one can drink that much.

I remember one time where I only had a bottle of vodka and passed out for two whole days. Had becoming a dragon increased my tolerance to alcohol? I shifted awkwardly on the bed, it was very uncomfortable with my new body and appendages. These things didn’t matter when I was drunk and tired, but they did now. I needed to stretch.

Getting up slowly I felt the blood rushing to my hand followed by a sudden rush of nausea. I didn’t want to throw up. After a few deep breaths the nauseous feeling subsided and I began to rise out of bed. I used my tail for balance, but balance was soon unneeded when I found myself looking up at the ceiling.

Ow, fuck! I fell. Looking down at my feet I noticed what I had tripped over, a bottle. Reaching out to grab it I got a weird feeling, the hungover hunger where you’ll eat anything. But I couldn’t eat a glass bottle–I’d slice up my insides.

Crack. Crunch.

My hands were empty. I ate it. I was surprised at myself for not remembering something I just did, but more-so to the fact that inedible things were apparently now edible. It tasted… fine. The kind of fine that ice tastes like, just not as cold.

It would suffice for a snack, but is was not enough to sate my hunger. Looking around at the other bottles strewn across the floor I soon consumed them also. If I ate them all I won’t trip over them, my logic was flawless.

I wondered what the bottle tops tasted like, they were steel after all. Perhaps they had a different taste to the plainness of glass. After digging into a couple I had my answer, steel tastes sweet–almost like honey. A couple of them were aluminium, the taste was still sweet but it more like golden syrup. I couldn’t wait to try eating other things to see what they tasted like.

After my snack I really needed to stretch everything out now. I reached up to the sky then to my toes. Arching my back I felt my shoulders pop, it was a good pain. There was some restriction of movement however. After pondering what it could be, I realised it was my wings–I got annoyed at them and strapped them to my body. I hope I didn’t cause any irreversible damage. Although I wasn’t happy about being a dragon, I was somewhat interested in the prospect of flying.

I quickly took off my hoodie and threw it on the bed. I carefully undid the belts holding my wings down and let them unfurl. One wing looked bent but it quickly fixed itself after I flicked it back. I was then momentarily overtaken by embarrassment. I was naked and in front of the window. I was a chick now too, I covered my chest for some reason. I didn’t have tits or anything–it was just scales–I was just acting on instinct, albeit an unfamiliar one. My figure was undeniably female, but by no means was I voluptuous. That was enough gawking at myself–I shook off the feeling, and sure that no one was watching me I put my hoodie back on. I didn’t restrict my wings like before, instead they burst out from the back of my hoodie by themselves. Saves me having to cut holes. It felt way better not having them restricted.

I looked up to a clock mounted on the wall, still ticking along after who knows how long. I needed to know when I was. Being isolated from time messes with people. Focusing my attention to the hour and minute hands I could tell it was something like 6:15am.

Time. I needed to find out what the date was, how long was I out?

Upon closer inspection of the clock, I found it had a digital section that read 5-6-16, so June 5, 2016. Triple said the world ended on May 23, 2015. I was out for a whole year, I wasn’t sure how to feel about this revelation.

I slowly opened the unlatched door to peek outside seeing my ute, unmoved. I also saw the familiar forms of three ponies curled up, their bodies’ occasional rising and falling being the only indication they were asleep.

Good, who knows what I would’ve done if it was stolen again.

Looking back inside the barracks cabin to my graffiti I smiled. I don’t know why but it made me feel good. I hadn’t smiled or laughed since I woke up in this world. Did that make me a bad person? Graffiting stuff felt liberating however, I vowed to myself to do more.

Walking out of the cabin, my now unrestricted wings shivered in the cold. They’re super sensitive to temperature, noted. I still need to get used to them, I doubt I would anytime soon. I walked over to the still slumbering ponies and simply sat down. Waiting until they woke up I would guard them vigilantly.

A couple of hours passed until Triple started stirring. She was the first awake. Seeing me looming over them was probably an alarming sight to wake up to. Her gaze was fixated on my wings as they were new to her. I shushed her and motioned for her to follow me. Tentatively she followed me, and we walked until we were outside earshot of the others.

Sitting down on my haunches I instructed her to do the same. I made sure to keep my voice down and without any hint of aggression.

“What do you wanna do?” I asked. Eager to know if she had a plan, now that the world ended. I recalled she had a refinery or whatever back up where I found her but surely simply squatting in a throw-together building could be called a plan.

Triple paused. Caught off guard by my question.

“Cos sitting around in that shitty hideout you guys had forever wasn’t much of a plan.” I answered for her.

“Well, I guess looking for any others would be a priority?” She answered uncertainly.

“Are you asking or telling me?” My classic sarcasm coming back into my voice. I hadn’t had the chance to be sarcastic lately–too busy worrying about other shit.

“Telling?”

My god woman.

After catching my waiting expression she cleared her throat and changed her answer, “Looking for others is a priority.”

“Good.” I said as I pat her on the head in a condescending manner. She only looked mildly annoyed.

I decided now and then that I would be nicer to Triple. Coming to terms with my recently harsh attitudes towards her was what I was doing in the hours awaiting her awakening. But I felt that she had more to say herself, I would let her speak before continuing.

“I still won’t forgive you.” She said indignantly.

That stings.

“But I’ll give you a chance.” Triple declared.

It sounded like it’d be a final chance. Two strikes and you’re out. I gulped, I didn’t want to lose my first and only friend in this wasteland. However a smile crossed my jaw. Suppose I should call it a snout now. A smile crossed my snout, marking the second time today. It was a nice smile if I do say so myself. The toothiness of it may have unnerved Triple, but she smiled back.

“Is there anyone–or ‘anypony’–” I add in mocking air quotations, “that you wanna visit? See if they’ve come back.” I asked, letting my plan come full circle.

“Not particularly. My parents were overseas on holidays at the time of the incident–I hope they’re okay.” Her response was quite nonchalant, but it had a silver lining. She didn’t have anyone she wanted to go see. So we’d just do my plan then.

“I’m gonna drive south. I have a friend in Tasmania. I need to check on her. I don’t know how long it’ll take, but I will make it. You’ll come?” I conclude. Not really asking her if she wanted to come, more posing it as a suggestion.

My friend in question was Isobel. We met through a school event and had kept in touch ever since. A somewhat long distance relationship, she even said she would have dated me. Not that it did me any good, she moved to Tasmania a while ago so any plans to visit kinda went out the door. There was never enough time in either of our schedules. But now was different, it was the end of the fucking world. She’ll have no other choice but to be with me.

Fuck that sounds bad.

“-I’ll go with you.” Triple finished saying.

Shit, I forgot she was talking. But she’ll come with me, so it’s a win-win. Who cares if I wasn’t listening.

“Great!” I exclaimed excitedly before quickly covering my mouth. I was being loud. My wings were splayed out, probably in response to my outburst.

Triple had started to head back to the others, but I had another question.

“H-hey, listen…” my voice getting caught in my throat, “Now that I’m a girl...can I ask you girly questions?” I sounded pathetic, but I really needed to wrap my head around everything. If anyone could help it’d be the only other girl here.

“Sure.” She replied, flashing me a genuine smile. I liked that smile.

Now all that was left to do was convince the others to come with me. By the off chance the refuse, it’d be no big loss. I walked down a bit further for a quick dart, before heading back to where my three companions were. I had newfound purpose.

Author's Note:

Edited by BaleonRosen.

Might later change the rating to Mature because of all the strong language.

A Hangover You Don't Deserve is a 2004 album by Bowling for Soup.