Twilight's 12 Pains of Christmas

by TheDriderPony

On the First Day

Twilight awoke with the morning sun, as she had done since becoming the student of the princess that orchestrated its movement. Getting out of bed, she yawned as she spread her wings, cramped from a night of habitually sleeping on her back. This was an old habit she wished would be easier to break, since sleeping on top of a pair of wings is never a pleasant experience. Unfortunately, years of back-sleeping had left her unable to fall asleep any other way, despite the discomfort. She gave them a few test flaps, stretching the ligaments to a satisfying series of cracks and pops. Sighing, she headed from her bedside to her en suite bathroom. A few minutes later, she emerged with her mane freshly combed and her breath no longer strong enough to wake the dead.

Deciding to be a bit more spontaneous than usual, she jumped off the top of her spiral staircase, taking it in a slow glide. The crystal walls of her castle had retained some of the evening chill, causing the air in the corridors to be refreshingly crisp. She closed her eyes as she glided, her near-photographic memory allowing her to navigate the twists and turns of her castle without so much as scraping a primary. She sighed contentedly as she banked around a sharp corner. Things were about as good as they could get. There had been no friendship problems for some time, all her friends were in good financial and social standing, and the upcoming holidays promised days of fun and frivolity with friends and family alike. There was nothing that could ruin her good mood.

It was about this time that Princess Twilight Sparkle flew face-first into a tree.

Her startled yelp, more from surprise than pain, echoed through the castle as she skidded and spun out on the well polished floor. She opened her eyes, reeling for a moment as she regained her bearing and tried to think of what she possibly could have hit. As her double vision fused back into a single image, she noticed the tree. Not the remains of her former home; that was still hanging faithfully from the ceiling. No, this was a new tree. Inside her castle. In the middle of the hallway.

It was a sturdy sprout. Too large to be called a sapling, but not so big as to be called full grown. Too large for a pot, its roots were housed in a large wooden barrel much like the ones the Apple family kept their half-century aged cider in, (though this wasn't one of those as it lacked their distinctive branding). To its branches clung small, delicate leaves and despite being completely out of season, from each branch and bough hung plump and juicy green pears.

Twilight sat dazed for several long moments, staring at her leafy intruder. She probably would have stayed there even longer if her stunted thought train hadn't been interrupted by the scritching scratching sound of claws running across crystal.

"Twilight!" Spike called as he barreled in her direction, toothbrush still hanging out the side of his mouth, "I heard you yell and hit the ground. Are you alright."

She shook her head a few times to clear the remaining fog. "I'm fine Spike. I just hit this tree."

Spike looked up, actually noticing the botanical barrier for the first time. "Oh. Hey. There's a tree." He turned back to Twilight. "Why is there a tree?"

"I don't know. It's not yours?"

He shook his head. "Not mine. Why would I want a tree? How would I even get it in here?"

"That's true." Twilight raised a hoof to her chin in thought, "You don't think it's Starlight's, do you? No, nevermind. I just remembered she hates pears. Plus, it wasn't here yesterday."

"Maybe it's a gift?" Spike mused as he walked around, checking out the tree from other angles. "You are kinda famous. It could be an early Hearths Warming gift from somepony you helped with a friendship problem. Weird thing to give though..."

"I... suppose that makes sense..." Twilight said hesitantly. "It is kind of thoughtful, in a way. Fresh fruit anytime we want. We'll have to find somewhere to put it for the time being, though. It won't last long outside with the winter snow coming so soon."

"How about the ballroom?" Spike offered. "It's pretty big, and has a ton of windows for sunlight and stuff."

Twilight looked at him incredulously. "I have a ballroom? Since when do I have a ballroom?"

"Uh... since always, I guess? You never use it, so I've been using it as a storeroom and reserve sunbathing spot."

Twilight blinked several times. "I really need to map this castle out, if only to make sure I'm not neglecting anything as important as an entire ballroom. Sweet Celestia, imagine what Pinkie will say when she finds out she'd been missing out on prime partying real estate."

Spike chuckled. "Heh, I can imagine it'd be a sight to see. Let me know when you're going to tell her so I can watch."

"Deal." She took a good look up and down the tree. "I guess I'd better move it then. Doesn't seem too big, I think I can manage it with basic telekinesis." She ignited her horn, as the tree lit up in a similar magenta glow. As the tree began to lift, however, a rustling came from the branches. In a flurry of leaves and feathers, something shot out of the tree directly at Twilight's face. She yelled as she cut off her magic, the tree dropping several inches to slam on the floor. Twilight flailed about madly, screaming and hollering as she attempted to remove the creature hugging her face. In a surprisingly steady and swift motion, Spike darted forward and grabbed it securely in his claws. Twilight continued to flail for a moment more before realizing she was fine. Panting slightly, she turned to her assistant. "T-Thanks, Spike. I may have panicked there a little."

Spike rolled his eyes at her understatement. The bundle in his claws cooed.

Twilight cocked her head. "So..." she began somewhat awkwardly, "What kind of terrible monster was using this tree as a Trojan Pony?"

Spike shifted his claws slightly, allowing a head to pop out. It cooed again, apparently quite content to be held twixt the claws of a fire-breathing reptile. "Oh cool, it's a partridge."

"A partridge?" Twilight asked, "Why was there a partridge in my pear tree? And how can you recognize a partridge on sight?"

"You remember that old tree that grew next to your tower back in Canterlot?" Spike asked. She nodded. "Well, there was a family of partridges living around its base. I got to be pretty friendly with them. Not like a Fluttershy level, but I taught them to fly through hoops and return on command. I kinda miss them, now that I think back on it." His gaze turned thoughtful. "Hey, you think I can keep her Twilight?"

"I don't know..." Twilight began, only to be hit with a dose of puppy-god eyes. Her tentative resolve melted instantly. "Oh, alright. You can keep her." She smiled as Spike's grin widened. "I suppose I was prepared to let you raise Pee-Wee back before we realized it was best to return him to his parents."

"Yes!" Spike exclaimed as he claw pumped in victory. The remarkably calm partridge cooed softly in his other hand. He stroked her head tenderly with a single claw, and she nuzzled it softly. "I think I'll call you Surely."

"Surely?" Twilight questioned. "Why would you call a bird Surely?"

"Wordplay and pun potential." He responded promptly.

Twilight chuckled. "Oh, Spike." Reigniting her horn, she once again lifted the tree in the air. "C'mon, let's move this somewhere sunnier. Now, which way is this supposed ballroom Spike? I think it's about time I see my home in its entirety."

Comments

[Mr cold ghost]

Oh i am liking this! Please continue!

[TheDriderPony]

7793217 I'm trying. My goal is a new chapter every day through the end of the song. Let's just see how that goes.

[Sols Sojurn]

*facepaws* You be a cruel cruel person and I LOVE this idea. At least Twi has the rooms for all that is coming.

[Meta Four]

I like the way Spike thinks.

"Surely you can't be serious!"
"I am serious! But thanks for spelling my name correctly. You have no idea how often people call me 'Shirley'. It’s really annoying."

[TheDriderPony]

7794247 There's actually another reason as well why I decided on that name. I'm waiting to see how long it takes someone to get it.

[Update]: Since no one ever guessed. I'll reveal the secret: Shirley was also the name of the mother in The Partridge Family.

[QueenMoriarty]

This were about as good as they could get.

Things

To it's branches clung small

its

You remember that if old tree

don't need if

[TheDriderPony]

7797204 Corrected. Thanks!

[Swashbucklist]

"Oh cool, it's a partridge."

AhhhhhhhhhIsee where you're going with this.