• Member Since 11th Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen Nov 19th, 2020


Just a nice, polite Canadian.


If there's one thing that King Sombra misses most, it's being inside his old Empire. Sadly, both Shining Armor and Princess Cadence currently rule there in his stead.

Now if only there was a proper way around those two idiots.

Original artwork by Keriwi1: HERE!

Chapters (14)
Comments ( 453 )

Yep. Get yer crazy-shields on, for this is going to be one wild, ride.

Poor Sombra's testicles, tho.

Brilliant. Now have Sombra answer the add to be Flurry Hearts babysitter.

Oh yes, I am very much looking forward to crystal empire shenanigans.

I can already tell this is going to be a crazy story...:pinkiecrazy:

Why am I even surprised at this point?

But can the guards 360 noscope?

7727924 i can! stickers for everyone!:derpytongue2:

I shall watch this for it amuses me.

the blackened abyss of all consuming knowledge

all-consuming knowledge.

Chopping down trees for firework.

Surely you mean firewood.

was the Red Barron

The word is normally spelled baron, but Barron is apparently a surname.

to resent divorcees


As for the story itself...

*puts on goggles*

Holy bejaysus this is funny. And what? Barely a thousand words!

a little strong, a little sweet, served piping hot. (A few terms Cadence had used on the stallion over the years, he thought to himself with a sly grin, as he later pissed out that very same coffee not thirty minutes after drinking it. Coffee had that effect on everyone, though.)

A perfect Like/Dislike ratio, and what's the first thing we get? Sex jokes and potty humor. I too should have peered down the blackened abyss of all consuming knowledge and seen this coming.


That would count as cruel and unusual punishment, right?

Well, this seems intresting.

Think Wylie Coyote trying to catch the Road Runner type of ridiculous.

Now I'm expecting dynamite and at least one catapult :derpytongue2:

"Think Wylie Coyote trying to catch the Road Runner type of ridiculous."

There better be a rocket involved..


This is already glorious, keep it up!

You can do it Sombro!

7728720 Agreed. Let it be done! :Luna Emoticon:(Someone should make that)

Oh my goodness this is gonna be good. Sombra with what I can only assume is massive amounts of brain damage.

7731511 Yes, this'll most likely end up as my stupidest version of Sombra. :derpytongue2:

7731202 I do back and forth dialogue in my head while at work. If it makes me laugh, I write it down and save it for later. My co-workers don't look me in the eyes anymore. :unsuresweetie:

“That would explain all those black hairs I keep on finding,”

"Uh, yeah... that's the reason all right. Yup, no need to go any further, mystery is solved!" Cadance said, frantically kicking at what appeared to be a hoof sticking out from under the bed.

7733397 Sombra's younger, more articulate brother Sumbra.

Whoa, 95 up to no down? You're technically really high on the fimfiction likes!

...wow. I can't really think of anything else to say. Another!

That was hilarious. However this ends, Flurry heart loving Sombra is the funniest thing ever.

Maybe you should write an alternate ending in which he becomes Flurry's babysitter. The shenanigans would be endless!

Well, this isn't surprising, really. Babies ARE Evil... It's why I get along with them so well.

Cadance and Shining Armour got OWNED by Flurry Heart!:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

I got a pretty goof chuckle out of this.

This is hilarious

Daddy's Little Beserker

Holy hell, how no dislikes..?


Blood for the Blood God!

This is amazing. Wow.

For the record, you're at 130 likes and no dislikes. I don't think I've ever seen that on here. Honestly I figured there was a bot account that disliked everything.


That one uncle you love because he's so stupidly smart.

One thing can i please beat him up in a chapter with my sisters oc long story short angerd a unicorn got sent back in time she was hes slave/magicle soilder experiment and is mad about it and would like payback

Wink wonk. ;)

Amusing. I was really expecting this chapter to end with Flurry Heart blasting him into low orbit, though. :pinkiehappy:

|'//|_| -\|-\ <=|[//~] \//_|-=

Flurry Heart is evil. Any surprises here?

Hahahaha! XD This... this was funny, nicely done.

Hahahaha, oooooh I love those headcanons where Flurry has a blood thirsty mindset, hehe.

nice job

well... I approve. this is pretty good.

“You’re ruining my mac and me time!”

It would be weird to hear that out of context.

And Cadence must have it rough trying to take care of a baby and Flurry Heart.

Add another NBD story to the list of "What Not to Read in the Middle of a College Library".

"I know Twilight passed that mandatory reading bill only last month, but—”

Thanks Obama.

This chapter was supposed to have a more "explosive" ending, but was getting a little long.

That's not a spurting cum joke is it? Because I noticed the other sex jokes scattered in this fanfic. even the, ah, cheeky and well hidden ones which i have no choice but to congratulate you for.

You don't want to know what Suzypants means to us British folk.

7738482 Sorry. No cum joke for you. :pinkiesick:

7738105 Your pic matches that last statement pretty well.

7737756 Nope. :eeyup:

7737496 Any time now. Just wait for it. :trixieshiftleft:

7737248 Thank you! :yay:

7737095 Tempting. :trollestia: Sombra + baby = cute and dark at the same time?

7739443 You already made it with the Suzypants.

Over here, a Suzypants refers to women who drench their underwear with lady juices after men rub their clits long enough. so you already made it. Dirty boy. Did you really not realize that? Then again you are Canadian so I shouldn't have expected you to have known that.

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