Twilight's Hourglass

Twilight wakes up after 100 years of unconsciousness and finds that life isn't what it used to be.

Editors:

MadMaxtheBlack

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 11 )

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CoffeeBean

CoffeeBean #1 · Nov 16th, 2016 · · 1 ·

That was fucking heavy...

I feel like there's an anvil on me, jeez. Another awesome fic, Lunatone. Keep it up; I look forward to your next work.

Ratmandango

Ratmandango #2 · Nov 16th, 2016 · 1 · 1 ·

I don’t get it, Twi. Why did you have to make a potion to put you in a permanent sleep for Celestia only knows how long?

Only Twilight would do these kind of things.

Commander Darklight

Commander Darklight #3 · Nov 16th, 2016 · · ·

di...did she die at the end

Cross Lament

Cross Lament #4 · Nov 16th, 2016 · 4 · 1 ·

I don’t get it, Twi.

I'm with Minuette on this one. Why would one want to do this?

Ocean Man

Ocean Man #5 · Nov 16th, 2016 · 4 · ·

I like this idea. But there are some things that but me.

1. Minutte doesn't need to be in the story. It would make more sense if it was about the Main 5.
2. There really isn't a reason for Twilight to do what she did by drinking that potion.
3. The story is way to short. We don't really get to see anything. That is something that does bug me. She going and exploring the world. And having to go and meet with Celestia and Luna.
4. Then lastly. She's an Alicorn. But yet she saids that i should be all old now. This could be used for the advantage of the story. Have her have to come to grips with her immortality. But if you do this her body would of have to grown as. Into more of the body type Celestia, Luna and Cadence have.

So yeah i like the idea of it. But not so much the execution of it. I still enjoyed some parts of it

Lunatone

Lunatone #6 · Nov 16th, 2016 · · 2 ·

7726040

Fair enough.

The story isn't perfect by all means.

I appreciate your thoughts.

Ocean Man

Ocean Man #7 · Nov 16th, 2016 · · ·

7726163 Well with the Minuette thing. I feel like it should have been one of the main 5. Or even Shinning. It would make us feel a lot more sorry for Twilight. Minuette she isn't really a big character. If this was a sequel to another story. And Minuette was a main character in that. I feel like it would make more sense. But having a character that has very little relationship with her. It makes us less sad for the readers. Having her brother have to tell her goodbye while he was on his deathbed that pulls at the strings more.

And with the Potion i guess there could be a reason. But there is really no way for us to try and guess what it is. For all we know it could have been that she drank it to defeat a bad guy or maybe she just got really drunk. I understand its meant to be open. But a lot of the time when people do open things like that. They give a little reasoning for it. The way Minuette said it just made it sound like she did it cause she felt like it. Could have done something such as " Why did you have to go and be the hero" ( Sorry if that's crap i always hated having to write stories. Or any thing with a plot in it) But having something like that would leave it open and us guessing.

I did enjoy the story. And funny that you said it wasn't a attack on me. I was worried that the way i wrote the comment would seem like i'm being to critical. But i did enjoy the story there is

P.s sorry if grammar bad. Been up all night being sick. Really shouldn't even be up right now.

Cyonix