• Member Since 5th Apr, 2016
  • offline last seen March 21st

MJP


Cutie mark crusaders: taking time away from the mane six before starlight and the young six made it cool

E
Source

Finding themselves with some downtime after finishing a school project, Apple Bloom and Button Mash plot to defeat a certain "favorite cousin" in a game called "Midnight Castle"


Graciously and painstakingly edited by Nightwalker .

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 7 )

Did you mean to have basically the entire story in bold, or did you forget to close one of the bold markers in the beginning? Asides from that, good story. Kinda refreshing to see Button Mash x not Sweetie Belle for once.

MJP

7679908 I think it was a problem importing the google doc, should be fixed now

Well that was... new. (Also, is the title a reference to the original MLP pilot?)

MJP

7685608 yes, yes it is

Wow this i such a cute story!!!!! I LUV IT SOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!:pinkiehappy::twilightsheepish:

lol ended up coming here to read this. Don't worry this has nothing to do with my story. I would say that you might need more editing. I got confused on who was talking multiple times during the fic because there were no said markers. I'm also fairly sure you mixed up a few characters lines or forgot to separate them because there were a few times where you credited Button or Apple Bloom fo someone elses line.

MJP
MJP #7 · Nov 7th, 2016 · · ·

7704062 I know, i need to work on dialogue tags I feel writing "said Babs/Apple bloom-0/button mash" over and over again feels redundant and I was always more for using context clues to determine who is speaking

Login or register to comment