Act II
Frozen Heart
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Chapter Nine
On the Finer Points of Delinquency
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There was never anything to do in this town. Sunset sat down by Mirror Pool Lake, skipping stones across it and wishing she were inside. It was mid-December, and the weather had recently taken a turn for the worse. The lake must have started freezing over in the night, as there were still bits of ice floating around it. Soon enough the whole thing would be frozen solid, which would ruin her favorite place to hang out, but at least it was safe for the time being.
Sunset debated leaving, but she didn’t know where else to go. It had been seven years since she had been discovered wandering alone and without her memories, and in that time she had explored everywhere. She had been all over the town, always searching for the por–
‘For answers,’ Sunset reminded herself. Sunset had been looking for answers, and nothing more.
She never found any. In seven years, she never found a place she recognized. No memories flooding back, no sign of who she used to be. Even her name, Sunset Shimmer, was only a possibility. Sure, it was on her bag, but since she had no idea if the bag had even been hers originally, Sunset Shimmer could be anyone.
Whoever she was, Sunset Shimmer was never found, so the name passed on to the girl who was carrying her bag. And she had to admit, Sunset Shimmer felt right. But there were other things that felt right to her. Impossible things.
So she searched. She’d visited every district in town and never once came across anything that resonated with her. Eventually, she gave up. It was the only thing left for her to do. She could keep searching for answers, sacrificing whatever was left of her sanity in the hopes that something would turn up, or she could just resign herself to never knowing. It wasn’t like it really mattered. If anyone from her past was still alive, they clearly didn’t give a damn about her.
Sunset skipped another rock across the lake, watching it bounce a few times before sinking. She sighed and stood up, not sure where she was going to go, but sure she was tired of being there. She shoved her hands into her jacket pocket and started walking aimlessly.
It was too early to go to the library or any of the stores she liked. Best to stay out of the main part of town, really. She could go to Everfree National Park, but she usually avoided that; it was far too close to her least favorite part of the town. She was tempted just to go back to the orphanage. She could sneak into her bedroom, she’d done it before. But it always came with a degree of risk. The noise from opening the window or climbing through it could easily attract one of the caretakers. Unfortunately, that had happened before as well.
Well, standing around wasn’t doing her any favors. She started walking towards some houses. She would be fairly safe in the neighborhood.
That is, if she could get there. While Sunset was still in view of the lake, a car pulled up alongside her. Her first instinct was to run, but that wouldn’t get her anywhere. Instead, she just continued along as if she didn’t notice it.
The car pulled ahead of her before pulling off to the side the road in front of her. Sunset stopped walking and waited. The passenger door opened and a man stepped out. “Sunset Shimmer.”
“Officer Blue Stripe.”
The police officer sighed. “You know you’re supposed to be in school now.”
Sunset furrowed her brow. “What are you talking about? It’s winter break!”
“That’s next week, Sunset.”
“What?” Sunset facepalmed. “Oh man, how did I mix that up? Hey, think you guys could give me a ride to school? Geez, I’ve already missed so much.”
Blue Stripe just stared at her for a second, before opening the back door. “Get in.”
“Thanks, you guys are the best.” Hardly believing he could be so gullible, she climbed into the back of the police car. She turned to the driver. “Hey there, Officer Swift Star. How’s the wife?”
He grunted in response.
“Good to know! Give her my best, won’t ya?”
Once Blue Stripe got into the car, Swift Star started driving. At least the heat was on, so feeling began seeping into Sunset’s fingers and toes again.
She watched the town roll by through the window. Everything was quiet in the world outside. It was a Monday morning, so most of the citizens of the small suburb were likely at work or school. The ones who weren’t would probably be spending the day inside. Some snow had fallen the night before, but it was still warm enough that the sun was making quick work of it. It made for an unappealing day to be outside, as Sunset had found out firsthand. True, no one would need to shovel any snow just yet, but in its place was a layer of slush that covered everything. It was just a cold, wet, miserable day.
Really, school wasn’t looking like a bad place to be. Sunset didn’t like school, but the subjects all came easily to her. If she ever decided she cared, she could easily climb her way through the grades. But she had given up pursuing a better education long ago, and was content to remain in seventh grade. Things were easier that way. She could skip half her classes, ignore most of her homework, sit out on every group assignment, and still ace every test to pass her classes.
Yeah, she’d just go to school, sit in the back of the class, ignore her teachers, and enjoy the heat. She should have just gone in the first place. If anything, her day would actually improve by going to school. So of course, that wasn’t the direction they were heading.
“You’re not bringing me to school, are you?” Sunset asked in an annoyed tone.
“ ‘Fraid not,” Blue Stripe answered.
“Why not?” Although she knew it had no real chance, Sunset had already committed herself to a story. “It was really just a mistake! Come on, I want to go to school!”
“You just want to not be sitting in the back of a cop car,” Swift Star said.
“Nonsense! Would this face lie?” Sunset pointed at her face as she gave the biggest smile she could manage.
“Yes,” they answered together.
Sunset sunk back in her seat, dropping her cheerful persona. “Well damn. There’s no need to be a bunch of dicks about it.” She wasn’t sure why she had assumed anything else would happen; her luck was never that good. There was no need to ask where they were actually going, she already knew.
Sure enough, she recognized the path they were taking. And since the lake was within walking distance to the orphanage, it was only a few minutes until they pulled into New Horizons Home for Children.
Blue Stripe stepped out of the car and opened Sunset’s door for her. Wordlessly, she followed him to the building. There was a time he would have lectured her; it seemed that since he and his partner had been the first people with extended contact with her, he had taken a personal interest in her. But that had been years ago, and Sunset had long since changed his mind. They’d had a few too many run-ins with one another over the years, which usually was a result of Sunset getting caught misbehaving. She was getting better at avoiding the whole getting caught part, but sometimes these things still happened.
Still, there was one person who hadn’t given up on lecturing her. Rose Petal stood waiting for them as they walked in, and her glare was sharp enough that even Sunset turned away from it.
“Good morning, Ms. Rose,” Blue Stripe said in a businesslike tone. Swift Star just waited off to the side, silent as usual. Blue Stripe may have held out hope for Sunset for a while, but Swift Star had always kept whatever feelings he had to himself.
Rose sighed and turned away from Sunset. “Thank you, officers. I’m sorry for the trouble she’s caused you.”
“It’s no trouble at all, ma’am,” Blue Stripe reassured her. “We found her down by Mirror Pool Lake, and it doesn’t seem like she was up to anything. Aside from skipping school, of course.”
“At least there’s that, then.” Rose turned back to Sunset, although she was beginning to look more exasperated than angry. “Oh, Sunset… What am I going to do with you?”
Sunset pointedly looked away.
Blue Stripe scratched at the back of his neck. “Er, have you possibly reconsidered what I said about –”
“It’s still out of the question,” Rose said sharply while fixing a harsh glare on the officer.
He frowned, but still nodded his agreement. “I’m sure you know what’s best for her. Is there anything else we can do for you?”
Rose’s expression softened, leaving no trace of her momentary hostility. “No, I think I can take it from here. Thank you, boys. You’ve been so helpful.”
“You’re quite welcome, ma’am.” Blue Stripe turned to Sunset. “Believe it or not, things would be a lot easier for you if you tried to behave yourself once in a while.”
Sunset just rolled her eyes. Despite what he seemed to think, she did behave herself. Once in a while.
Without any acknowledgment from Sunset, the officers left. She waited expectantly for Rose Petal to lecture her, but she didn’t say anything. It seemed Sunset would have to go first. “I tried to get them to take me to school, for the record.”
“So it was the police officers that kept you from going to school, then?”
“I didn’t say that.”
Rose folded her arms. “Well then, why don’t you tell me what did keep you from school?”
Convincing Rose that she hadn’t done anything wrong wasn’t going to be an option, of course. The best she could hope for was damage control. “I only wanted to skip my first class ‘cause I already finished the project we’re doing, but the rest of the class is still working on it. I wouldn’t be doing anything in that class anyway.”
“Is that so?”
To some extent, it was. The class really was working on a project, and Sunset wouldn’t have been doing anything while they were all working on it. Although in actuality, that was not at all because she was finished with it, as she had no intention of doing it at all. Likewise, she hadn’t planned on going to school after her first class, either. “Yes. I was going to go for the rest of the day, honest.”
“You know very well that you need to go for the whole day, regardless of what you will be doing.”
“But it doesn’t make make any sense!” Sunset said defensively.
“Remind me, what grade did you get in that class on your last report card?”
“I got a C.”
Rose regarded her skeptically. “A C?”
“What? It’s passing!”
“I seem to recall it being a little lower.”
Sunset frowned. New Horizons had twenty-three other kids for her to keep track of; how the hell did she make a point to remember Sunset’s report card? “I thought it was a C.”
“It was a D, but we can check if you’d like.”
There was no need to check. Sunset had known what her grade was. “It’s still passing,” she mumbled.
Rose continued to hold her stare for a few more moments, then broke her composure with a sigh. She walked over to the side of the room and sat in one of the chairs for potential adoptive parents to wait in. She nodded towards the seat next to her, so Sunset sat down as well.
“Sunset,” she said gently, “you’re such a smart girl. I know you could do better if you applied yourself.”
Since she lacked any way to explain herself, Sunset just turned her eyes to the ground.
“What do you think is going to happen if you don’t pull your grades up? You want to work with computers, but you need more than just the knowledge.”
“That’s so stupid,” Sunset said, not directly addressing Rose. “I know enough about computer engineering to practically start a career in it already. Who cares about my grade in history class?”
“That is the world we live in,” Rose said, not unkindly. “All the knowledge in the world won’t help you get into a good college if you don’t have the grades to match.”
Sunset frowned. “And no one will hire me in a competitive field without a college education. It’s stupid, and not fair.”
“You’re right, it’s not.” Rose turned to look directly at Sunset, who still wouldn’t look at her. “There are kids here who are smart, who would do well if given a real chance, but who can’t test well, or just don’t learn best in a school environment. And then, there’s you.”
The return of an accusatory tone caused Sunset to look back at Rose, and she regretted it. The disappointment in her caretaker’s eyes looked all too familiar, and suddenly all she could see was someone else’s magenta eyes staring at her.
“You could excel in school, but you refuse to even make the attempt.”
“You could make friends easily, if only you would put forth the effort.”
“Is school really so bad that that you’ll risk your future to avoid it?”
“Are other ponies so bad that you’d rather be alone instead of trying to befriend them?”
“Sunset… what’s the real problem here?”
“Sunset… what’s the real –”
“I’m sorry,” Sunset said, placing her head in her hands. “I’ll do better, I’ll go to school, I’ll do the work, I’ll get my grades up.” ‘I’ll do anything, just make her go away.’
Recognizing what was happening, Rose changed her tone entirely. “It’s okay, Sunset. There’s no need to worry, we can work on it.”
It was all Sunset could do to nod meekly. She was afraid to pull her hands away from her face, afraid of what she’d see. She did it anyway, refusing to allow herself to look weak in front of Rose Petal. Nothing out of the ordinary was in the room – it was just her and Rose.
“What’s going on, Sunset?”
It was clear Rose wasn’t talking about school anymore. “Nothing. I’m fine.”
Rose gently placed a hand on Sunset’s shoulder. If it had been anyone else, Sunset would never have allowed it. Then again, Rose Petal was the only person who ever tried to touch Sunset in the first place. “You know, I’m always here to talk about anything you’d like.” Rose gave a warm smile. “Somedays I think it’s all these old bones are good for anymore.”
Sunset didn’t want to talk about it. She resolved to put the incident behind her as if it had never happened, turning to face Rose with a carefully composed expression. “I’m ready to go to school now.”
Rose hesitated, and Sunset could tell why. No matter how much she controlled her body language, her voice had sounded frail. “I think it’s well enough into the day that we can just resolve to do better tomorrow.”
Although she had been trying to get out of school the whole day, Sunset didn’t want to miss it for that reason. “I’m fine, I can go.”
“You know, you can take it easy when you have an honest reason to.”
Sunset wanted to argue, but she didn’t. She never did. It didn’t happen often, but hearing things – usually her – wasn’t new to Sunset, and she was always left shaken afterwards. Too shaken to offer any real resistance, especially when the thing she was resisting was the chance to be alone in her own bedroom.
“Okay,” Sunset answered in a defeated tone.
“Is there anything you’d like to talk about?” Rose asked hopefully.
“No.” It was an easy answer; there was nothing to gain from telling Rose what she was experiencing. She would just wind up with another therapy session, in which she’d carefully control her responses to show a perfectly normal girl. The same routine as always.
Rose had also come to realize therapy sessions got them nowhere. Unfortunately, that didn’t mean she had given up on finding something that would work in its place. She waited for a moment, clearly debating if she should push for more, before resigning the day as a loss. “Alright then… Why don’t you relax for a bit, and I’ll come check on you later?”
“Yeah, okay.” Sunset stood up and shuffled to her room. The building was mostly empty since school was in session, so she didn’t meet anyone in the hallway.
She kept her head facing forward as she walked in, not wanting to look at the mirror that hung on the wall beside the door. As tempting as it was to just collapse on her bed, she didn’t like the idea of sitting in silence, so she hit play on her stereo, letting whatever CD was already in begin again.
Softly strummed acoustic guitar chords began playing. It wasn’t exactly what she wanted to listen to, but it was a good CD for the moment, so she left it in. The gentle sounds of the folk album would be calming, which was what she needed.
Sunset sat on her bed and sighed. She looked around the room for a bit, trying to figure out what to do with her time. That was her life these days – she was either trying to shrug off responsibility to get some free time, or trying to figure out how to fill it once she had it.
Lacking anything else to do, Sunset grabbed a book. She wasn’t really in the mood to read, but it would pass the time. The CD eventually came to an end while she read. True to her word, Rose Petal stopped in to check on her after a few hours, and was relieved to find Sunset was looking better.
By the time other kids began to return from school, Sunset’s boredom had peaked. She needed to go out for a bit, but wasn’t so sure that Rose would be okay with it. Even though Sunset was clearly more relaxed now, her caretaker would probably want her to take it easy.
Not that she would let that be a problem. She put away her book and turned instead to her stereo, ejecting the folk CD from earlier. She chose a very different one to replace it. A distorted guitar drone sounded, followed by the drummer counting the band in, then the sudden start of the full band launching into a synchronized explosion of noise. She turned the volume up, careful to leave it low enough so that no one would complain, but loud enough that everyone would know she didn’t want to be disturbed.
With her distraction in place, she grabbed her purse and moved to the window. No one was in sight, so she opened it up and climbed out, closing it behind her. She shoved her hands into her pockets and began walking.
She’d bought herself an hour. After that, the CD would be over and she would no longer be guaranteed any privacy. An hour was more than enough time, though. The store she walked to was only twenty minutes away at a leisurely pace, and the cold motivated her to move faster.
Along the way, Sunset contemplated how much she would follow through on her promise to do better in school. On the one hand, Rose made a valid point about her future. On the other, Sunset wasn’t sure if she really cared.
In the end, she would just do whatever she felt like at any given time, so it didn’t really matter too much. By the time she arrived at the store she had already put the issue behind her.
The warm air as she walked in was a welcome relief. The young man behind the counter greeted her with a smirk. “Well if it isn’t my favorite customer.”
‘Good, he’s here.’ The cashier was nothing short of a creep. He was out of school, so he had to be at least eighteen. And still, he was always distinctly flirtatious every time Sunset had seen him, despite the fact that she was twelve. She worked it to her advantage. “Hmm, favorite? You sure about that?”
“Of course.” He leaned across the counter as he talked, so sure that she thought he was oh-so-cool.
Sunset grinned and gave an overly exaggerated eye roll, which ended with her eyes pointed directly at his. “If you say so. I’ll be up in a minute.”
“Take your time, I’m not going anywhere,” he said.
‘Thank goodness for that.’ He seemed harmless enough, but Sunset was always content in the knowledge that he wouldn’t be able to follow her once she left the store. Still, his creepiness had its advantages – she sailed right past his suspicions.
The store was Sunset’s favorite for reasons other than the willfully blind cashier. It was large enough that the aisles made for suitable hiding places, leaving her only visible to others within the same aisle, and yet it was small enough that it didn’t have a dedicated liquor section.
She found the beverage aisle completely empty, as she had hoped. It was too early for the after-work rush, and too cold out for many people to want to shop anyway. Free of prying eyes, Sunset casually walked along the wine bottles and grabbed one without stopping, slipping it into her purse as she went. It was the only reason she ever carried a purse; backpacks had to be left at the front of the store, but purses went unquestioned. Even, apparently, oversized purses. Ridiculous fashion trends were good for something, it seemed.
Further along the same aisle, she stopped to grab a two liter bottle of soda. It was the perfect cover-up, since no one would question why a kid would walk to the store for a bottle of soda.
Without wasting any time, she brought her purchase up to the counter. The wine bottle weighed down her purse, but it didn’t create too much of a visible difference. And of all the things that sleaze might have been paying attention to, Sunset doubted her purse was what he had on his mind.
“Just this?” he asked as he rang up the soda.
“Yeah, that’ll do it.” Sunset pulled out her wallet, discreetly keeping the bottle tucked away. “Unless I can pay for a candy bar with my good looks.”
“Hmm…” For a moment he looked like he might have actually been considering it, but thankfully he shrugged off the request. “Ask me again in a couple years, maybe.”
Fighting back the urge to remind him she’d still be a minor in a couple years, Sunset paid for her soda and left as quickly as she could without causing any sort of alarm. Not that she was worried he’d ask to check her purse – she’d been doing that sort of thing for years, and knew she’d get away with it – but everything about him gave her the creeps. She still stopped to give a friendly wave on the way out, though. Creep or not, she wanted him to stay hopelessly oblivious to her behavior.
The walk back was spent trying to decide how to while away the rest of the day. She couldn’t keep sneaking off in hour long intervals, so resigning herself to spend the day inside seemed like the only thing to do.
The CD was still playing when she returned, as she knew it would be. She carefully climbed in through the window, closing it soundlessly behind her. Leaving the CD playing to cover any further noises, she shifted her mattress to get to the box spring underneath, which had a hole in its fabric covering. It had always been there. They must have decided that since it hardly impacted the effectiveness, they might as well still use it. Sunset was very grateful for this oversight.
When it came down to it, she didn’t trust anyone. She suspected that while the kids were at school, at least some of the caretakers were nosy enough to go looking through their belongings. She’d get caught easily if she were using any of the default hiding places – under the bed, in the closet, in her dresser drawers. They were all too predictable. But no one would ever think to check inside the box frame.
She reached through the hole, stretching her arm as far as she could. Even if someone decided to check the hole, for whatever reason, they still wouldn’t know where her stash was hidden.
Her fingers found the pillowcase, and she pulled it towards her. A small shiver ran down her spine as she opened it, revealing the brown journal tucked away inside.
She ignored it, and reached for her purse instead. For whatever reason, the brand of wine she had grabbed had always been Sunset’s favorite. She suspected it was the label, which depicted a sun that could either be rising or setting. The overblown name, Versant du Soleil, amused her as well. She suspected it was just a marketing ploy designed to make the wine seem fancier because it had a foreign name.
But it would have to wait until later. Even Sunset wasn’t bold enough to start drinking in the middle of the afternoon, when people were awake. She shoved it in the pillowcase, making a point to place it on top of the book so she could just reach in and grab it without being reminded of what else was hidden away. Not that she ever forgot.
Once she tucked the pillow case back into the corner of the box spring, Sunset replaced the mattress. Since she didn’t really feel like listening to something so angry, she stopped the CD before flopping onto the bed. With nothing else to do, she sighed and picked up her book again.
Ok, But considering my personal life experiences, and given that Sunset literally has the knowledge of a person at least 16 years older than her physical age, I'd say she's roughly the equivalent of a shiney evee.
I'm not suggesting that she's not entirely responsible (becasue she's not), but even in the human world she's in the same position she was in Equestria. Her actual abilities exceed her growth privilege, and she has to pass time until that potential becomes unlocked. The only difference with her general appraisal system is now submitting from exhaustion instead of rebelling in alarm.
7854303
Twelve, although your point still stands.
I'm guessing you mean something along the lines of a complete oddity? If so, then you're completely correct. A magical unicorn who was turned into a human child and lives in a world that believes (and quite justly so) that she'd be crazy for believing that? There's really no way to turn out normal from that kind of situation.
Not really. She could absolutely apply herself more, and be in a much better place. It literally says so in the chapter, in fact:
If she put forth the effort, she could have skipped grades no problem. By this point in time, she'd probably be in college and on her way to earning a degree in computer engineering. Money wouldn't be an issue, since grants would come exceedingly easily to a twelve-year-old genius. She could hardly ask for a more supportive home life, given the circumstances (while she lacks parents to take care of her, Rose Petal and Violet Dusk would bend over backwards for her if she would just let them).
That's not to say she's not entirely responsible. She was the one who got herself into this situation, although Celestia shared some blame (Celestia something wrong, yes, but Sunset reacted to it in a horribly stupid way). But okay, we take the mistake of going through the mirror as a mistake and move on. From there, a lot happened that wasn't her fault. She's been placed in some horrible circumstances, ripped away from the life she knew and understood to be placed into a new one that's so different it's causing her to doubt her own sanity. But that's sort of the thing here. Sunset has been handed situations that are genuinely bad, and consistently reacts to them poorly, causing more bad situations, which thus continues spiraling downward.
7854332
You're still assuming all personal efforts are recognized and that an authority is necessary to direct those efforts. Emancipated and homeless (assuming the unlikely fantasy that development companies genuinely care about her education and would be fighting over a supposed prodigy) is not necessarily a better place considering the myth of arrival and all that. Without a challenge, reward, rest, and recognition it isn't technically work anyway. Obviously the parts where she is below average are going to be history, social studies, potentially physics, and given the pony newspaper Sunset would apparently be dyslexic.
YUSS Pre-teen Sunset is a go!
So nice and simple chapter. It really shows Sunset's state of mind. She is definitely in a vice circle, in which she needs to control the world around her; but guess what? The world doesn't let itself being controlled. The more she tries the more unhappy she becomes, and then she mistakingly keeps the fight against it.
Can't wait to see more of this stage of Sunset's life. Thanks for this!
7854380
Indeed, this chapter was meant mostly to set up her situation after the age jump. It's an unavoidable thing to do, since I don't have the time to dedicate to taking this story any slower, but I'm really way more into the rest of this act. With this chapter out of the way, we're finally about to be at the part of the story that I've been most looking forward to
7854379
I'm not assuming that at all, I'm just saying her current failure is her own doing. If she applied herself, yes, she could fail. But as she's not, she's failing by default. "Well, I would do this thing that will probably benefit me, but my efforts might just go unrecognized anyway." Not a particularly great way to go about life.
I never said she'd be better off emancipated or homeless. I said she'd be better off if she applied herself to achieve something and work towards a higher education.
Colleges want money. It's honestly that simple. If they want a second thing, it's alumni who make the college look good so that other people will want to go there and thus they'll get more money. I didn't say that the colleges themselves would be fighting over her (which they would, but I'll come back to that), I said she could get grants to pay for college effortlessly because of her high intelligence and ability to handle social situations (when she actually cares to do so). So with the grants, yes, colleges would want her because they're getting paid to take her. And because her early success (going from elementary to high school grad in a very short time period), they would actually want her aside from the money, because it would be a safe bet that she could continue to succeed. Not to mention any publicity she gets will be because of her education, so "Local prodigy is attending Blah Blah Blah college" nets them free advertisement. So no, it's not that they give half a damn about her. That's just irrelevant.
I'm unsure what you're referring to. If you mean her current situation, then absolutely. I wouldn't classify anything she's doing now as work. If you mean the act of getting herself into a better situation, or her life once she's in said situation, then I don't see how that wouldn't meet those four criteria (I also don't see how that's a criteria for what is 'work' except for the challenge part as well, but that's neither here nor there).
7854435
If she has nothing to loose except her newly discovered freedom, safety, security, family, friends, comfort and joy, then she has nothing to gain from taking her self to higher places. Sometimes guided cage is better than a mental one of shame based responsibility. In other words, a bigger cage isn't necessarily a better one.
She has clearly chosen to develop her judgement instead of her sense of duty in this case. Why is it more wrong for her to become a sovereign citizen instead of a working one?
Keep in mind sovereignty was the ultimate goal of her ambition.
It's not that some people of average or below average intelligence are incapable of achieving higher education, but there are limits to what can be done with the resources that a person has available.
Yes, she would be able to attain a bachelor's degree before she was thirty years of age, even with a double standard (like being more than a decade older than her percieved age) set in place against her. That achievement would still be possible and is without question.
However, professionalism if not mastery would be unattainable without the aid of an apprenticeship, 'friendship,' 'help,' training, or assistance program. That is becasue there is an actual system in place which prevents social development from continuing on a straight path, (not growth, physis, morphogenesis, or the aeon from occurring) without interference.
Just becasue something is twisted, bent, or broken doesn't mean it is worth less than something that is rigid and cannot bend. Still, it cannot be called the same thing as unfettered, undamaged, straight or pure.
Tell me more about these grants a ward of the state can get, besides the obvious one set aside to assist poor and the one provided to government personel. Not everyone has the same luck or ability to obtain scholarships. However, given her age, I'm sure she could easily rack up a debt that could force her to sacrifice her immediate freedom and work for the pittance afforded most teenagers.
Challenge > Work > Achievement > Reward > Rest(oration)
Academia is based on the achievement model of working (and yes, I had to look this up). You have a challenge which consists of a standard or measurable goal that is possible to achieve by the person in question. A coach (like a teacher or manager) is there to assist a person in achieving or discovering a specific (if not higher) level of performance that produces it's own reward and is followed by the restoration (or revitalization) of consumed energy.
Sunset is burned out (depressed) becasue she went from alarm, to resistance, and is now in a state of giving up from exhaustion. A general apraisal system is being used instead of the kubler-ross model becasue it's not a genuine counseling model and not everyone realizes bargaining and negotiation is a form of resistance nor does everyone roll over and accept the inevitable.
While I'm not denying Sunset is responsible for her performance, the very act of withholding technical information, without demonstrating the proper skills for her to obtain them, and not correcting her deficiencies as a human being (or homunculus) in general, goes beyond Sunset's current inability to adhere to a schedule due to lack of interest.
7854435
maybe this will explain Sunset's mental state better...
after all, there isn't any point there's never any point.
7856092
Is this meant to be sarcastic? Because that, uh, that sounds like a hell of a lot to lose, you know Not that she has family (at least not in a traditional sense, and not anyone that she would acknowledge as family) or friends to lose in the first place.
The point is she should work towards a future that would make her happy, no matter what that future is. She's miserable at the moment, so it stands to reason that she should work on changing that. It's stated several times throughout the story that Sunset's highly interested in technology, and that it's the only thing she genuinely enjoys in the human world. Rose comments about working in computer engineering, which is then verified by Sunset to be the future she genuinely wants. My argument that she ought to get her shit together and work towards going to school is not based on a belief that that's inherently the better path for a person to take, it's based on that being the path to the thing she specifically wants.
I would say her goal was more so to be number one than to simply be sovereign. She always looked to put herself on the top, not simply to be independent from others.
In fairness, I should have used the word 'scholarship', not grant. That was my mistake, and you're correct that she would not be eligible for more than the basic government assistance programs in the grant department.
But on the subject of scholarships, she does absolutely have the ability to obtain them. It's ridiculous to say she doesn't. A few of your comments about her age seem to be referring to her as an adult, but that isn't how the world views her. She was already more or less a genius as a seventeen-year-old unicorn, then she retained all her knowledge when being turned into a five-year-old girl. Yes, she had to learn some new subjects, but given her skill at learning, she's able to do so easily. With those out of the way, her age becomes a huge asset. The world views her as a child, so thus it views her intelligence as even more impressive. If she had been working on achieving her goal (and again, her goal is to work in computer engineering because it's a genuinely interesting field to her), then she could have graduated high school before this point in the story without much difficulty. She is twelve here (as far as anyone is aware), and scholarships are not going to be difficult to get for a prepubescent high school graduate.
I agree, honestly. I realize that it may look as if I'm saying it's a simple thing for Sunset to fix her problems, but I don't really mean it that way. I'm just saying that these steps would help her, not that it would be easy for her to take them (mentally speaking).
Slight suggestion's for the chapter name's of the two next time skips. "On the Finer Points of debauchery", "On the Finer Points of nihilism" Based on the current decline so far this seems like a likely stop and endpoint.
Yielding one's only passion in life will not make you happy, wounder if there will be a suicide attempt at some point. Current heading in mind that does seam like a good inference.
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I hadn't thought about naming the chapters in any kind of pattern. It'd be amusing, I'll see what seems fitting when those chapters come up
This story just keeps getting better by the chapter! I always look forward to the new chapters; you're writing style awesome. This is pretty much the only story I'm tracking that actually gets updated regularly.
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Smol Sunset was so popular that I was worried people would be grumpy to see her getting older so soon. Glad that doesn't seem to be the case though Getting better by the chapter should most certainly apply to the next chapter (in my totally unbiased opinion), as it'll be kicking off the story arc I'm most excited for
And I do take a lot of pride in my weekly updates. I don't think I'll have any problems keeping them consistent for the remainder of the story
7858417 So I idly reread the chapter one's more after being drawn back to read the response on the comment. With a timeskipp of any kind you are forced to infer what was skipped, but infer as i might i can't see why she would abandon her desire of learning.
Academic pursuits was her sole joy in life and she seemed to cling to it along whit some personal items as her way of adapting to an alien environment, literal in her case.
She's portrayed as bored the majority of the time, and she is clearly intelligent enough to obtain the literature herself if denied by others. So why giving up her one passion and enjoyable source of stimulus in such a drastic way to entirely shun it.?
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Largely it's because I just never interpreted her as being primarily interested in learning. Twilight likes learning for the sake of learning, whereas Sunset likes learning when it will benefit her. She was rather fixated on skipping grades, but it was more so because she wanted to get away from younger children. She was also interested in learning about the new world she was in, because she is interested in learning even if it's not her primary interest, but that was to take said knowledge back to the world she wanted to be in.
I've always considered pre-reformation Sunset to care about power above all things. Not necessarily physical power (although in a world with weaponized magic, knowledge most certainly translates into that), but power over others. Why else would she spend time bending a high school to her will, when we've seen in Friendship Games she's intelligent enough to get out of high school if she wants (the Acadeca sequence against Sci-Twi, even if she didn't get the equation right it was well beyond high school level)? As Celestia's student, she advanced through her knowledge, getting ever closer to the top.
But like I said above, she was genuinely interested in learning. She still is, to some extent. She enjoys reading and learning new things, but she doesn't necessarily feel the need to apply that knowledge in any kind of beneficial way (the chapter does say she aces every test, despite not paying attention to the classwork. She is still learning on her own). But still, the point remains that she isn't applying herself the way she once did. Even if the odds of her becoming a human princess through studying alone are even lower than they were as a pony, she could still attempt to get herself into a position of power through knowledge. But over the years, she eventually gave up on getting back to Equestria, then stopped believing Equestria even existed. She's now having auditory hallucinations as a result, and her entire mental well-being has been thrown off. She's depressed, which causes apathy, which causes her to not do anything to make her life better, which causes deeper depression, and so on.
7860739 "Largely it's because I just never interpreted her as being primarily interested in learning. Twilight likes learning for the sake of learning, whereas Sunset likes learning when it will benefit her"
That just hit the nail straight on its head, thank for the time.
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No problem
Without reading the other stories in this series and just reading this as a stand-alone fic, it seems a little jarring at times. Sunset appears to be forgetting all her time in Equestria, but this fic also reads like it wants to lead into Equestria Girls, merely presenting a potential path that lead her there where she came into the human world as a little kid instead of a teenager. The two plot points don't mesh very well.
That said, I can expect that one day Sunset will tour the high school she expects to attend, finds the portal as she remembers it, then starts studying her butt off to make certain she gets into that school.
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This story is intended to be readable as a stand alone story, or as the first story read in the series (I do kinda suggest people wait until this one is done before moving on to the majority of the series). So, ideally, it shouldn't require understanding of the other stories at all. As for Sunset no longer believing in Equestria, it was just the more logical way for things to go, I think. She went to a foreign world with no way to get back to her native one. She looks like the creatures that inhabit that world, and she consistently tells people that she doesn't remember her past. Her brain has physically been altered, so she doesn't have the full memory functions of an adult. One of the only people that she's told about Equestria has given the perfectly rational explanation that it was a delusion created to fill in the gaps. All of these things combine to make a situation where her grip on her past would reasonably be shaky at best. But it will coincide with the Equestria Girls movies in time. She's 12 here (by human standards) which means she still has roughly five years before the events of the first movie, and quite a lot can happen in that timeframe.
I'd like to again thank you for commenting on every chapter along the way. I dunno if you noticed, but I did reply to quite a few of your comments (when staying on a story, Fimfiction doesn't always give notifications that that you've been replied to on said story). Hope you enjoy seeing how things unfold from here
7863217 You replied to my comments on at a time on the chapter the original comment was made on. That's what's happening when people don't get system notifications - if a story has 2 or more chapters and a person makes a comment on Chapter 1, and a second person replies to the first comment from the front 'cover page', that comment defaults to Chapter 2, and so the first commentor doesn't get a sys note over the reply.
And yes, I do leave chapter-by-chapter comments a lot.
That said, something will obviously happen to make Sunset believe again, if Equestria Girls is any indicator.
“Sunset,” she said gently, “you’re such a smart girl. I know you could do better if you applied yourself.”I hear this every bucking day
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That’s certainly something I’ve heard quite a bit as well And it’s never really as great of a pep talk as the people saying it seem to think it is. Imagine that
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Maybe because it is generic and don't really adress the reason for the other lack of effort. To tell soneone they coukd do better if they tryed means nothing sice if the person wanted to do better they would alread be trying to do so.
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Not to mention that often they are trying to do better, they just have a more difficult time doing things than others believe is reasonable, so they get branded as lazy
All in all, we'd get a lot further with attempts at understanding than immediate judgements.
Now this is a gripping way to showcase the difference between Sunset in Act 1, Equestria Girls, and here. The mix of drama and her characterization/sense of humor is working really well.
I've gotta hand it to you, I've barely scratched the surface, but if I want to be worth anything at work tomorrow I'd better put this down. I'll continue on at work.
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Haha yeah, probably for the best. Glad you're enjoying it though
To beer the cause, and solution to all life’s problems
Would have loved to see the innerconflict within sunset as she set out to not only have alcohol for the first time but to steal it and consume it as a 12 year old, but seeing it as almost a part of her routine was great in a depressing kinda way.
Alas you like your dramatic reveals (like in *CENSORED* when *CENSORED* happened) and this is a drama piece after all.
Also wonder if she ever drank as a pony she could probably create it with magic but I assume would view getting drunk as a waste of time when she could be studying.
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Another one of my WWB stories, In Pieces, has Sunset recounting the tale of the first time she drank alcohol. It's probably not as interesting as you're hoping for though lol
How is it that noone remembers where they originally found her in the first place? It shouldve been in the police report if anything
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It would certainly be in the police report, but Sunset doesn't have access to that. She could probably find out easily enough if she wasn't so determined to think people are against her.
Delinquency?
Oof
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I am: Not Good At Spelling
Seeing weird parts of my middle school self reflected here. Huh. Honestly, I think this is the first time I've read something that reminds me of that version of myself in a long time, or at least that I remember. F in the chat for Sunset Shimmer, and also twelve year old me lmfao.
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Oof relating to Sunset in this story isn't exactly a good thing, hope you're doing better now.
This reminds me of a time back in my life too. Trying to keep some things hidden away...a thing that is personal to you and you alone inside of a home that could have any number of family members. Not to the extent that Sunset is showing, where she's clearly skirting and breaking the law, but things that would concern a parent or authority figure to know an adolescent is doing all the same. Knowing that there are some things that you can get away with or count on in other's behaviors or characters that would give you an edge, or certainty in how they would respond in a given situation. Not exploiting it, but still using it to your advantage to circumvent some of those pesky questions that would come up otherwise. Knowing that you should and could do better, but there are some days you just don't give a damn.
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I have a lot I want to say to this comment, but I'm a little weary of dumping it all on you. Basically I'm just really honored to have written something that people relate to. It's been a highlight of my writing, and reading your comment here has filled me with pride at having written this story. So ultimately I just want to say thank you for sharing your thoughts, it means a lot to me, and I hope you continue to enjoy this story.
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If you want to let something else out, you can go ahead. I like this kind of back and forth dialogue, and it's revealing at times to learn a little more about the person behind a piece of work. If you feel shy about doing it here, you could also throw me a private message. Still making my way through the story bit by bit, but it's a rich and believable narrative you have managed to craft. At least from what I've seen...as at any time things could come crashing down. Buuuut I figure that's doubtful with what's here so far.
Yer more than welcome my good chum! It's a good read like I've said so far, and I'm still finding more along the way to like about it. Still pluggin' away when I have the time and drive to give it a go!
Cursed time skips! D: I'd have gladly read a blow-by-blow of the last seven years!
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I always kinda wanted that too tbh. If there was going to be a fifth act to this story, that's where I would have expanded it. Maybe set it in like 3rd grade or something, and have it be about her slowing loosing touch with Equestria. I even had ideas for things to do with Sugar Breeze and Dew Drop. But alas, this story is quite long and cuts needed to be made
This chapter really makes me wonder what would have happened if in this cercimstance if child sunset was ether A adopted but B what would have happened if she ran into someone bigger and stronger then she was.
Like what would have happened if sunset tried pulling the manipulation game on some and get someone else in trouble only for that person to come around and put her in a hospital bed for her trouble. Make her so scared that they will come back would she have struggled out her act.
My only complaint with this story is that it makes sunset feel lazy I think if sunset were as smart as she is supposed to be in this story then cannon sunset would be angling that for power and would already as you say be in college right now. I mean if she were say as old as she is now when she first arrived then I could believe it but this just feels lazy of her and she's smarter then this.
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Those what if scenarios are always fun. As for laziness, I would describe it as apathy. She's become very mentally unwell since the story started and just honestly doesn't care enough to apply herself anymore.
oof, sounds like the process of her current brain possibly eroding at her sense of identity and sureness of memory has run much further on its course
love that this is now just as much a part of the tapestry of her past now. the formative experiences of a second childhood
oof, what a contrast in contrast to being stuck in human kindergarten. this feels like that Sunset just worn down over the years
well that is very extremely creepy!
oof, again that sense of being worn down by the years and the younger brain she is in. she used to be precocious for her apparent age but now she is just a very ordinary preteen delinquent! what happened to all of her drive? almost feels like Stockholm Syndrome, but for a life situation